Truth to be told, this fic was always dead last in my list of priorities. I like writing it, but sometime there would be distractions. Like the release of the Fate/Extra: CCC English translation a few days ago. I played the hell out of the game.
Emiya Shirou is popular with married women. Every now and then, when he leaves the restaurant at the hands of his employees. He comes home, opening his house to every mothers and wives throughout the neighborhood.
For what exactly? Is it something nefarious? Something secret? Or is it something adulterous? Well he certainly got the looks- but that's wrong, very wrong. Everything about that was wrong. Today we observe one of certified papa bear Emiya's hobbies.
The tanned man walks around his kitchen, around him were five married women. Each of them sweating for some reason. "Now, is everyone finished cleaning!?" He suddenly shouted.
"Yes Chef!" Everyone replied in unison.
"Yes Chef what!?" He asked once more, in a tone akin that of a drill sergeant.
"Yes Chef Emiya!" Each one of them replied once more, with two of them crying while cutting onions.
"Aright you pansies! Let us make something! Something so good your husbands would forget about drinking and come home early to taste your cooking! Something so legendary that your partners would propose to you a second time!" The single father yelled to his students.
"...But I'm the one who pro-" One of them audaciously raised their hand.
"Did I stutter!?" Emiya quickly cut them off.
"N-no Chef!"
"C'mon move move move! Start cutting the ingredients. Hayase! Heat up the pot! Our daughters might be friends but I do not intend on holding back!" He orders.
"Yes Chef!" The one who answered was Hayami Hayase, Mimi's mom who just recently decided to partake in Emiya's weekly cooking lessons.
Emiya turns his head to the other women in the vicinity. "You two! Start chopping the chicken, double time!"
"Alright!" They answered.
"We've got two hours left until your husbands come home, make sure to make no mistakes!"
...
...
...
One hour later
Emiya and his crew were done, each and every one of them come out of the Emiya household, exhausted by Emiya's Spartan-like training. His cooking lessons has helped many people improve over the years.
Well, he himself knew that he's not one of the best teachers but Rin told him to get a hobby, so he did. It's been two years since he started doing it but it's been fun. As a parent he understands the struggles of raising a child, until they grow to certain age, you would have little to no time for yourself.
He could say that he's an expert on the matter, as mature as Rin is there are still moments where she needs attention. Time flew too past for the two, it feels just like yesterday when he still drives Rin to kindergarten. Now, she's nearing her college years.
He shook his head after reminiscing of the past. No dillydallying, he needs to go to the restaurant to close it.
Emiya opens his car after locking his home. The former guardian grabs his keys and starts the family car. Its engines roared as Emiya drives it out of the garage and unto the street. And just like that, he drove his way to the restaurant.
A few minutes later, he arrived at Copenhagen. He parked his car and peeked through the glass windon of the family restaurant. "Huh, what's she doing here?" What he saw was Rin, Mimi, and a meek looking girl named Kusa. "I told her to bring friends sometime but I didn't expect this. Rin barely brings any friends at the restaurant, especially Mimi, what could have changed?
A Few Hours Ago
Rin Emiya stood in front of the school gates. It had been a day since she went shopping with her grandmother, it was tiring of course, but it was also surprisingly fun. It would be more fun if not for the weird looks that they got. It was understandable, Irisviel is a beautiful woman, the most beautiful she's ever seen.
The school girl took a single step and entered the premises of the school, she greeted the gate guard and proceeded to walk to her class, people greeted her on her way there as usual. Truly, Kazakura has one of the nicest student populations in the whole country.
A few minutes later, she arrived at her classroom. Fellow students were talking to eachother as usual, the typical pandemonium before class was expected. She looked to her right and saw her friend Mimi, the blonde girl was talking to the boys as usual, behind her was Kusa, a meek girl with whose whole thing is being good at videogames. Come to think of it, last time she invited her to play Smash Bros. at home she was utterly destroyed.
"Yo, Emi-chan!" Mimi greeted when she noticed Rin. "Woke up early today, huh."" The gyaru remarked.
"Good morning, Mimi." She greeted back. Rin then turned her gaze to her other friend. "How's Sir Alonne?" She asked Kusa, who was playing on her Steam Deck.
"Shitty hitboxes as always, how the hell did this get pass playtest?" Kusa remarked, her friend has been stuck with that boss for days. "I know he's optional but still."
"Heh? That's just Dark Souls 2 being Dark Souls 2." Rin replied, sure she's not really an avid gamer but she knows enough to not be lost in the conversation. Well... she's beaten Dark Souls 2 twice on New Game Plus so that says something.
The young girl sat down in her usual seat. In front of Mimi, at the middle of the room. "Hey, did you know about-!?"
Before she could speak even further. She was interrupted. The door opened as their teacher arrived at the scene. "Settle down class, we're starting." The teacher said.
"Haaaaii..." Her classmates answered in unison as they all sat down to their proper seats.
A few hours later, the students come to the cafeteria for lunchbreak. Mimi, Rin, and Kusa sat at the same table, Kusa almost let her food fall off the table because her face is pretty much glued to the screen.
Meanwhile, Rin opened the lunchbox that her father has prepared. Mimi looked at the food in utter disdain. 'Why is she looking at me like that?' Rin thought, confused.
"Y'know... I still can't over the fact that your Dad can cook." Mimi spoke before Rin could even utter a question. "That big hunk of a man having such... unfitting profession. I would expect him to have something like a hired bodyguard. Hell, working at the local yakuza sounded more possible."
"Or NTRing the local hot married woman." Kusa suddenly interjected. "I mean he certainly got the looks." The girl shrugged.
Rin's brow twitched in irritation. "Ew no!" Shirou Emiya is a strict but dignified man, besides, he did work at the local yakuza when he was younger, but that's just because he's a good person doing mechanic work.
"Nahh, he won't do it. My mum comes for him for cooking lessons." Mimi rebutted. "Now back to the topic, why can your dad like, cook really REALLY well? You said he didn't go to any culinary schools."
"And how would YOU know how certified a certified chef's food would taste like?" Rin quipped, still irritated. "Wait- lemme guess. You got this gu-!"
"-I got this guy-!"
"Called it." Rin rolled her eyes.
"Aaanyway, I got this guy. Extremely rich, took me on a date on a really expensive restaurant. The chefs there were said to be top class, he said he would pay for the food. So I was like: "Yeah, I'll bite." So I got there, the food took awhile to cook but it was immaculate." Mimi explained in a weirdly serious expression. "But, here comes, Emi-chan with his dad who can cook even better food for some reason!"
Rin palmed her face and sighed in exasperation. "Alright, I'll tell you. Don't be disappointed though." The little Emiya cleared her throat. "Well, funny thing is. It's not really that special. My grandpa, Kiritsugu can't really cook for his life, so dad took up cooking to take care of him cuz dad said that he was really ill."
"Heh? What about your grandmother. Where was she anyway?" Mimi inquired.
Rin's eyes widened. 'Oh shit, the dead wife thing!' "Ah-oh! Remember Grandma Iri?" She got an idea fortunately.
"Yeah?"
"So, her full name is Irisviel von Einzbern, they were said to be an extremely rich family in Germany. So my great-grandfather, Jubas-whatever, felt like he was unworthy of grandma and took her away from grandpa." Rin said oh so casually.
"What the actual fuck!?" Kusa suddenly shouted, having put down her game to eat lunch. Both friends turned their head to her. She had been silent this whole time so they assumed that she was not listening at all. "You're bullshitting me!"
"I mean- Kusa, that's what my grandma told me. I know the rich part was true because of the amount of items that she bought yesterday. Who in their right minds buys four air conditioners because they felt like it!?" Rin's anger suddenly busted out as she recalls how much of an insane spender Irisviel is.
Kusa backed away, intimidated. "Alright, calm down."
"So that's the reason? Emi-chan, I dunno if I have to tell you this but I think your family is full of insane people. No offence" Mimi spoke in a half-sarcastic tone.
"No, you're right. I'm probably the most normal one." Rin replied calmly.
"Not even your dad?"
"Especially my dad."
"So, about the rich family thing. Did you perhaps... inherit some? Just saying." The gyaru sneaked in.
"Oh hell no! Dad said that it would be pain to manage and left it all to my aunt."
"Aunt as in, Sister?" It was Kusa who asked.
"Something like that, oh look!" Rin pointed at the clock. "Lunch is almost over! Gotta go!" Rin stood up and wrapped her lunchbox. "Hey, the two of you wanna go at dad's place after school's over?"
"Hell yeah! I wouldn't pass up for some Emiya food." Mimi responded.
"Sure, haven't tasted it yet. I guess I gotta try." Kusa responded as well.
Back to the Present
"Rin, you're worryingly good at twisting stories." Emiya commented as they drove on their way home. Emiya cooked a little snack for the girls before going home.
"Oh, so I'm just gonna tell them that those two were superghosts that can be summoned to fight a secret holy war for the cup that touched the blood of Christ." Rin replied sarcastically.
"Not that." Emiya sighed. "Anyway, are you sure you're ok meeting other servants? Caster said that they would be coming back with more. Their Master's coming too." Emiya spoke of the last line with an annoyed expression.
Rin shrugged. "I mean, it could be fun."
Emiya rolls his eyes. "Yeah fun... for you." HE could just tell how much of a pain it would be.
{Omake: Servant Class: Father}
Rin Tohsaka engraved the summoning sigil at floor of her basement. She checked all the clocks in her manor, it was nearing two in the morning. The perfect time to summon a servant.
'Yosh, let's start.' She thought.
"Anfang." The first word of the incantation was spoken
"Heed my words." The sigil starts to glow red.
"My will creates your body, and your sword creates my destiny."
"If you heed the Grail's call and obey my will and reason, answer me!" The basement gets enveloped in a red maelstrom of light as the wind blows everything away.
"I hereby swear..."
"That I shall be all the good in the world."
"That I shall defeat all evil in the world." The incantation was nearing its completion.
"Thou Seventh Heaven, clad in the three great words of power, come forth from the circle of binding."
"Guardian of the Scales!" A pillar of light bursted through the summoning sigil.
Rin was confident, everything was perfect. Surely she's drawn the strongest card for sure. Her vision returned a few seconds later, only to see-.
"Huh-?" She was confused, there was nothing, no change, everything was as it was before. "What!? I go through all that effort but there's no-!"
*Boom!*
An explosion was heard from the living room. "WHAT!?" Rin exclaimed. She rushed herself to the living room, running as fast as she can until she hit a door. The magus tried to open the knob, but it was stuck.
"Open up, dammit- whoa!" Her struggle was cut short when the door suddenly opened. She stumbles a little, almost falling off the floor. The young magus looked up, what she saw perplexed her even further.
A tanned man with white hair, wearing a denim jacket. The mysterious man has his back turned against her while looking at the broken furniture, HER broken furniture.
"Damned Tohsaka, I haven't even prepared Rin's lunch yet..." Her ears tingled when she heard what the man whispered. 'Tohsaka? Rin? What does he mean about preparing lunch!? It's two in the morning!' She thought, irritated. Now that she thought about it, the man feels wrong... in an unnatural way.
'Alright, Rin. Calm down, you're a Tohsaka, be elegant.' The girl tried to calm herself. "Ahem!" She cleared her throat, getting the attention of the mysterious man. "I was not informed that assassinations include destroying furniture." She said elegantly, as a Tohsaka 'should.'
"Assa- what now?" The man looked at her with perplexed expression. Like he's looking at a lost child scolding an adult.
Tomorrow Morning
So apparently the man was her summoned servant. An Archer class servant. 'Who would've thought that my clocks were advanced by an hour!?' Rin thougt.
Said servant was doing her hair while she was drinking tea. "H-hey, aren't you taking this whole servant thing a little bit literally?" She asked the man.
The man snorted. "It's alright."
'Alright!? This guy just washed did my laundry, dried it all night! Fixed my living room in an hour! Woke me up and cooked my breakfast! All without being ordered too!' Truly, what absurd servant did she just summon? And why did she forget to ask him about his identity?
She thought all of this while her Archer servant did her hair diligently.
I hope you still wait for my updates.
I'll come back when I feel like it. Bye.