Walking out of the stadium, Aizawa, Tiny, Joke, Saeko and Eri had come towards the bus they arrived in. There, they had seen the entire class there talking amongst each other with some laughing. Once they noticed their teacher, they pulled away to see Ochako holding Izuku into her chest and pouting to no end. "Who stole that girl's twinkie? HAHAHA!" Joke tried to laugh this off for Ochako to scowl at her. "Ok. Easy. I just wanted to tickle your funny bone. I didn't wanna pick a fight with you, little miss."
"Mommy!" Eri ran up to Ochako immediately for her face to turn from one of anger to one of joy.
"Hi Eri. How was your day? Did you like spending time watching your mommy and daddy kick butt." Eri nodded as the brunette went over to hold Saeko who was happy to see her mother. "Were you a good little baby while we were gone too?" The small baby giggled as their teacher had everyone start loading up on the bus. Once done, Izuku had sat next to Ochako who was giving him a cold shoulder.
"Ochako. I told you before, it wasn't what you thought it was."
"Oh really, then why did it look like you were more interested in that girl than me? She even waved at you giving a lovestruck image. Do you prefer women that are closer to your size or maybe ones that have a more pulled in chest?"
"No. Of course I don't prefer those types of women. I mean, you are a bit larger than a normal woman-"
"So I'm fat now!?"
"N-no! No no no! Not that type of larger! I-I just mean you're bigger than most women-"
"So you're mad that I'm larger than most girls!?"
"That's not what I'm saying!" Izuku tried to reason with his logic as Ochako kept going on a bit of a tangent. This caught Aizawa's attention, further irritating the poor man.
'Why do I have to hear their lover's spat right now?' "What's the problem?"
"Sir. It's not a big deal. It's really a misunderstanding."
"A misunderstanding!? Then why were you on the ground looking like you were ready to get cowgirled by a girl completely naked!?" Everyone was silent as Ochako said this. All the girl's eyes immediately darted glares at Izuku for him to try and explain himself.
"It's not what it looked like! I swear! She transformed into you, fell, I helped her and somehow, she was able to melt off her clothes and everything! I didn't do anything or coerce her into doing that, I swear to you!"
"I dunno man. That rager you had after definitely gave me a mix of emotions in your words." Sero chimed in for Izuku to glare at him. "I'm just saying. You're saying it's not deep, but you looked like you wanted some action."
"So you were looking to cheat!" Ochako got very mad with Izuku trying to find out the best way to explain it. "How am I so certain you didn't have a quickie with that girl in the bathroom and her waving lovestruck to you is her post bathroom romance!?"
"That never happened!? I would never do something unclassy like that to someone."
"So you never thought of railing Ochako on a toilet seat before?" Jirou chimed in with a deadpan face showing she wasn't too fond of Izuku at the moment.
"W-well, I have thought of it. But I keep it away so I don't come off as a creep."
"I bet Kaminari has thought of doing that with you." Sero says to Kaminari but Jirou manages to hear it and kicks him in the nuts for the joke.
"And after all the stuff we've done in the past, do you honestly think doing it in a restroom would be unclassy compared to that? You've filled a tub up when we held a deeper night of passion. You've used me like a tool before and this is where you draw a line of being too perverse?" The antics of this was starting to get to everyone for Bakugou to finally speak up.
"Are you that fucking dumb to think that the nerd could cheat on you and get away with it?"
Ochako glared at Bakugou and tried to keep him out of their squabbles. "This doesn't concern you, Pomeranian."
"This stopped not concerning me when you started blasting Deku around us and had Ears here join in to try and validate your thoughts." Ochako wanted to argue, but realized she opened the door to have to accept the possible insight. "First and foremost, Deku's never fucked anyone but you. Second, girls wouldn't look his way unless they had use for him and being one to spread their legs for him when we were in middle school was one of the last things they were asking for. Third, on what planet would he be willing to cheat on you when you drain him of everything in the tank daily?"
"K-Kaachan! Stop saying such inappropriate things!"
"My fucking point! He's not ballsy enough to do this shit, and why the hell would he? You're the best catch in our whole fucking school and he married you before we even started classes. Stop bitching and making shit up as you see it and look in the fuckin mirror. You're six almost seven feet tall, have boobs bigger than his fuckin head and big enough to make pony tail look like a she's a member of the itty bitty titty committee like Ears is."
"Go fuck yourself Bakugou, I take that personally." Jirou shouts, flipping off the blonde man.
"Fuck me yourself coward."
"Enough! I've had it with this ridiculous argument over some psycho student trying to make moves on one of our friends. Midoriya Ochako, you are overreacting not letting him get a word in edgewise and Midoriya, you should have made it clear from the start that you're married instead of panicking. There! Does that fix this?" Iida shouts, shocking the others so much that they can't even respond to this. "Good, now everyone get on the fucking bus so we can go home. I have a massive headache because my glasses got broken and I've been straining my eyes now for several hours so please keep the noise to a minimum." Iida demands before marching onto the bus, flopping down into one of the chairs. He pulls a sleep mask over his eyes and folds his arms indignantly.
"Never thought I'd see the day where he'd drop an f bomb, much less say anything profane." Ochako says more towards herself than anyone else.
"Why are all the women I know out of their fucking minds? This is why I'm with Kirishima, you all are fucking crazy." Katsuki remarks before walking over to said redhead, grabbing him by the suspenders of his hero costume and dragging him onto the bus.
"Wow... he's so sexist that he's gay. That's a new one." Momo says, causing Jirou to nod as the rest of the class starts to funnel onto the bus.
"To be completely honest, I think calling him sexist with his comment is a little out there since to be frank, counting his mother, Ochako and all of our class, we are a little out of the ordinary. Honestly, the most normal of us is probably Saeko and she's not even toilet trained." Izuku motioned to Saeko who began busting out laughing at the comment.
"So? Does that mean him calling us out of our minds?" Everyone shrugged at Jirou's comment for her to glare at them.
"Uhh...let's just overlook this and pretend the comment didn't happen." Izuku somewhat avoided any more problems before being somewhere they could make problems.
One hour later
The class came back to the school with the sun beginning to set. As they did, Eri began to nod off a bit for Izuku to carry her on his back. Once they entered into the dorms, almost everyone began cheering and looking to have a bit of a party. The only two that weren't exactly fond of the situation that had happened was Bakugou and Todoroki who unfortunately failed the exam and were unable to find out until the end of the second half. As such, both decided to head up to their room. Since the kids were somewhat tired alread, Izuku and Ochako put them to bed a little early. However, they kept the monitor for both in case something had happened. Once they came back, Kaminari and Sero brought out a large bottle of vodka for the two to smirk. "Anyone feel like getting lit tonight?"
"...I think you're more dumb than you look, thinking that's smart." Ochako gave a smirk as Tiny rolled his eyes and went away with a puff of smoke before returning in a similar smoke holding a bottle in his hands. "Where did you even find that?"
"If we are having something to drink, why not enjoy something more enjoyable."
"Well, if you are offering, I'm willing to have a little." Izuku said, accepting a glass from Tiny.
"We stole it from Mr Aizawa."
"Of course you did. Well count me out, I'm still breastfeeding so I can't have any." Ochako says, turning her nose up at the idea.
"I guess if we're having alcohol, I'd go with something Tiny's suggests."
"Ditto." Yaoyorozu and Jirou walked towards Tiny with those that agreed going towards the giant fox.
"OH COME ON! WE BOTH WORKED HARD TO GET THIS AND YOU'RE ALL JUST GOING TO TURN YOUR NOSE AT US!? Kaminari shouted for an 'ahem' to come towards the door.
"Might I ask what you're doing with my coping mechanism?" Aizawa asks, looking towards the class irritated.
"Sir. If you'd like, I can offer you a nice bottle of sake that we infuse with some lovely berries for flavor." Kumasi came out of a poof with a nice sized bottle with a label called 'Friendly Fox' on it and gave it to the teacher.
"What's the proof?"
"It's a rice liquor not a wine so its 120 proof."
"Bitchin. You may proceed." Aizawa says as he snatches his vodka bottle back from Sero then shambles away.
"Why do you both have to be so moronic to steal from your teacher." Everyone stopped immediately and turned to Kumasi who had spoken like an old British man.
"...So when did Kumasy learn to talk?"
"THAT'S YOUR QUESTION, MIDORIYA!?" Everyone shouted at Izuku for the bear to calmly answer him.
"I have learned over the time I had returned home. Tiny has been most helpful in teaching me enough to have a proper conversation with you, young master."
"...And you learned while talking like a man from England."
"Indeed. I find them quite a fresh and reasonable group of individuals and I was able to mimic them well." Tiny had opened the bottle he had in his fur along with a wine glass to pour and drink from it. "*sigh* Quite refreshing if you ask me."
"That's oddly enough not the weirdest thing I've learned of my family." Ochako came from the kitchen with a large stack of food and began eating alongside Kumasi while also passing him a few sandwiches to eat.
"Ok...what's the weirdest thing that actually have been shown to you by your family?" Tsu asked for Ochako to finish pushing a foot long sandwich in her mouth to chew and think on it.
"Well the rising of the dead I think anyone would have taken the cake. But if we pull that away because I think that was something working alongside Death if we're honest I'd have to put it to...seeing my parents in the buff in the bath a few years back."
"THAT'S NORMAL!" Everyone shouted for Ochako to stare at them like they're a bunch of weirdos.
"You see your parents regularly in the bath naked looking to make passionate love together? Weird."
"LIKE YOU'RE ONE TO TALK!"
"Personally, I think the Spider Crab massacre I've seen is the weirdest thing in your family." Izuku points this out with Ochako shaking her head in disapproval.
"That's not weird. That's a celebration feast on the norm with us."
"So slaughtering monstrous crabs that can snap a knife with just their shell and hearing what sounds like bloody murder in the other room isn't weird to you?"
Ochako shrugs at Izuku trying to think of the logic. "Guess it's just weird to you because you're not around it so often." Nobody wanted to touch this anymore for the group to look at Izuku next.
"So...Any great stories you've got about her family." Ashido asked for everyone to smile and wait for an answer.
"Well...I actually got a few. One time was when I was talking with Ochako's mom. We had a bit of a conversation about having kids with Ochako. She told me about a sweet spot that is in their family."
"...Where's the sweet spot?" Kaminari excitedly asks with wide eyes.
"Right here." Izuku says as he places his hand on the back of Ochako's head before starting to massage her ears. Immediately the brunette almost melted at his touch, tilting her head upwards into his hand as her tails start to wag uncontrollably as he scratches her ears. "It's basically a turn off switch for whenever she gets mad. Let's just say it helped a lot when she was pregnant with Saeko."
"Ohh yeahhhhhaaaaaaa..." Ochako smiled happily as a bit of drool came off her mouth. "Higher. Higher...right there...almost...aaaahhhnn~" Ochako gave a loud moan for Izuku and everyone to stare at her a little uneasy.
"That also happens." Izuku says as Ochako tilts to the side, falling into his lap. "Usually she purrs when I do this, but that only happens when I do it to both ears."
"Like a cat?!" Momo reclaims
"Yep." Ochako hugged Izuku tightly and began passionately kissing him. She pushed him to the ground and began wagging her tails rapidly. "Though if anyone else tries they'll get incinerated. Some guy tried it when we were on our honeymoon and... well it wasn't pretty."
"Ok, clearly we now know how Izuku can turn on Ochako's switch." Ochako eventually pulled away from Izuku for the couple to smile at one another.
"So...would you like to continue this in our room?" Izuku asked for Ochako to whisper in his ear.
"Only if you're ready for more entertainment from me~"
"Ok, lets move on with something else before things go too adult." Jirou mentioned before taking a sip of the sake she was given by Tiny. "Any chance you have something good and sweet."
"Then I suggest having a bit of sake we make with some plum juice inside it." Kumasi offered to pour the girl the drink for her to take a sip from it and smile. "It's quite delightful, isn't it?"
"It actually is. Kinda tastes like juice."
"Just be extremely cautious. That which goes down easier tends to hit you notably harder because you do not hold yourself back."
"Oh come on. Do you honestly think I won't be able to hold myself back?" Jirou said this as she continued to drink another glass.
"Well, I suppose being the voice of reason to you is the best outcome I can give you." Kumasi pulled the bottle away and placed it in his mouth before walking towards the other side of the room and pouring a glass for himself and Tiny. The two enjoyed their drink while talking amongst each other.
"So...Lady Inari said that you were able to learn multiple different languages. Fantastic."
"Yes. After gaining the ability to speak as a human, I was rather inspired to learn other languages *sips* It's quite lovely to find out languages and learn about the world through them." Kumasi seemed happy as he thought about how many different tongues he was able to speak. While this happened, he was given a peanut butter cracker to eat. This however was not the greatest moment for him as he had a notable amount of peanut butter stuck on the top of his mouth to start struggling to lick it off.
"Smart animals we may be, there are still common traits of our species we still struggle with." Tiny commented as he watched Kumasi struggle and the rest of the class begin diverging into madness from alcohol to some degree.
And that finishes this chapter. See what happens next time. Hope you all enjoyed and thanks for reading.