(Clementine's Pov)
-Two Weeks Later-
I was sitting by the grave again as I look at the marker. I had a beer in my hand and I take a breath when I hear the others.
"Hey Clem, um... mind helping?" I hear and look to AJ and I nod as I get up.
"Sure, what's up?" I asked and set the bottle down by the grave and walk over to him.
"Well.... We need to go in Violet's-."
"No, we aren't cleaning it out, sorry but not now." I tell him.
"I get it, sorry but we also need to get some seeds, the cabbages went bad." He says.
"We don't have spare seeds?" I asked as we walked to the truck.
"We thought we did, but it's artichokes we have." He explained.
"I wanna come." I hear and look to see Liz running up to us and I nod as she hops in the truck and I look to the gate a bit and I rubbed my eyes.
"You, ok?" Liz asked.
"Yeah just... I'm fine I promise." I tell her as I start up the truck and we exit out the gate. I just drove to the old general store and looked around a bit.
"So... What uh... God I don't know what to talk about anymore." I laughed as I placed my hand to my head.
"It's fine, you're still mourning." AJ says and I look at him and sighed.
"It's not.... I know she's gone; I've just been... out of it." I tell him and I look to the road as I parked the truck and we go inside and look for any seeds.
"It's fine." I hear and I sighed a bit and we grab what we can. It was the last of the seeds in the store and I see an isle filled with Liquor bottles and I go over and see they're empty and I stare at the bottle a bit.
"Mom." I hear and look to AJ and he looked to me.
"What?" I asked and looked to the bottle and laughed a bit.
"Oh this? Shit wouldn't get anyone wasted." I say as I dropped the bottle breaking the glass showing it was empty and I take a breath.
"Do you think you should... stay away from that stuff?" He asked and I look at him.
"I don't have a dependency on it, don't worry." I tell him and we head on over to the truck and drive back to the community. When we did end up coming back the gate was opened and I drive through. I pulled up to my house and I park the truck and I lean back in the seat and then got out with AJ and Liz. I then headed to the back yard again and I look to the grave marker and I take a seat and grabbed the bottle.
"Hey." I hear and look to see Minerva and I sighed and I look back to the grave.
"Sorry I'm just... I'm just... I don't know why the hell I am feeling like this." I tell her as she takes a seat next to me and I look at her.
"Care to explain?" She asked and I took a drink.
"I never mourned like this, it feels weird, like really weird." I tell her and I look to the grave.
"I've never felt so.... Useless, like I don't want to do anything anymore." I tell her.
"Depression is a bitch." She says.
"But that's the thing, I don't get depressed, I'm not allowed to be depressed, I've lost so many people over the years, I've delt with this shit, why am I feeling like this?" I asked.
"Well let's be fair, you and Violet have been married for a very long time." She says and I look at her.
"And you and her have raised a family, so you lost family member, a wife, a partner you've dealt with for so long, AJ lost another mom, Liz lost a potential second mother... it's just... it's just that, you've been with them for so long you know so much about a person and when they're gone... you just... you just lose something." She says and I look at the grave and I take another drink.
"I don't... I... just feel like shit." I tell her.
"Well... does that have to deal with the fact that she had so much to deal with and you feel like she took the easy way out?" She asked and I look at her.
"I mean, she was bitten we know that but I mean... she took herself out." She says and I look down.
"Please don't remind me that I couldn't take my own wife out of her misery." I groaned out and I set the bottle down.
"No, I mean... I didn't mean to say it like that... shit I'm not good at talking about this stuff." She mutters and I laugh a bit.
"No, no you are not." I laughed and I look to the grave again.
"I don't think it's healthy for you to just be sitting here with a... grave marker." She says.
"Look, it's all I have left of Violet."
"How? You have her vest, you have photos of her, your leg was built by her." She says.
"I mean that... I know that she's right here, I wish I could have her physically with me and this is the next best thing." I tried to explain.
"I honestly wished we could have cremated her but we couldn't." She says and I look to the side a bit.
"I'm getting another beer." I mutter as I get up and I head inside the house and grabbed a beer before it was taken from me.
"Hey-."
"Nope, we did the same to Violet, you can't be drinking." She says and I look to the woman and then to the ground.
"I just... I want to forget that she's gone." I tell Minerva.
"Look I think you and Ruby should talk, we can't be having you getting drunk in this state." She says and I glare at the ground a bit.
"I would like to just have one night." I say as I grabbed the bottle back.
"Think about it this way, would Violet want you to turn to drink because of her?" She asked as I opened the bottle.
"I'm not drinking to get drunk, just... please leave me alone.... I promise I'll come out later not drunk of my ass." I tell her.
"I want to trust you Clem but I don't think you should be left alone." She says.
"Minerva trust me, I'll be fine, plus there isn't much to drink anyway." I tell her and show her the fridge.
"Alright... fine, but... please talk to us." She says and I nod as she leaves and I look to the back door again and I take a breath and then took a drink. I go over to Violet's recliner and I take a seat then look to the photobook on the coffee table so I grabbed it. I flip through the book a bit and smiled as I see the photo of Violet and I as we were dancing at Joans.
-Flashback-
"Come on Clem, it'll be fun." Violet says as she comes up to me as they played some country music.
"No, I don't want to." I say as I was seated on the porch.
"Come on Darlin' ain't no shame in dancing with me." She says in her country accent and I look at her. She tips her cowboy hat to me and I smile a little bit and I hear her chuckle.
"Come on Clem, dance with me, it'll keep my mind off work." She says as she held her hand out to me.
"What if my leg breaks?" I asked.
"Darling, I made that leg to withstand any damage, please just one dance will make me happy, and I bet you'll be happy too." She says and I look at her a bit as she moves her hand away from me and then takes a seat next to me.
"Clem... I don't want to pressure you into doing something you don't want to do, and I'm sorry if I am... we can just sit here." She says and I look to her as she looked over to the kids and we see AJ dancing with some kids and Mary was also dancing as well.
"He looks happy." I say.
"He does, and look at Mary." She says and I smiled a bit at this. I then look to Violet as she took her hat off and I look back to the others and I sighed a bit and I get up and down the stairs and turn to look at Violet as I held my hand out to her.
"Well, let's dance Darlin'." I joked and she laughed as she gets up and puts her hat back on and then takes my hand and she shows me how to dance to the song. It was funny and I actually laughed when she tripped a bit but not to fall on her face and she looks to me as she grabbed my waist and I look up to her and she looked down to me.
"You know I love you." She says and I look to the ground a bit then look to her.
"I know you do; I love you too." I tell her and she smiled just a little and then kissed my cheek and I look to her and I place my hand to her cheek and kissed her on the lips.
-End Of Flashback-
I stared at the photo for a bit before I took a drink from the bottle and I look back to the photo album just a little longer. I smiled as I saw the photo of Violet as she was looking back to me and giving me a thumbs up while she was covered in oil from the motorcycle. I traced the photo and I look to the side a bit and then take another drink. I got up from the chair and set the book on the table as I go to mine and Violet's room. I haven't been in here since we brought Violet back and I go in the closet and I find Violet's secret stash and I grabbed the bottle and took a drink and coughed a bit.
"How the hell could you drink this with a straight face?" I asked out loud and then laughed.
"Oh, it sucked but I got use to it." I hear and look to see Violet next to me.
"Oh my god, I'm not that drunk, am I?" I asked out loud and she laughed.
"I mean, you drank half a bottle of my moonshine." She says and I look to it.
"You put it in a whiskey bottle?" I whispered and she laughs and nods.
"Uh duh... what has you down to this?" She asked and I look away. I didn't want to talk to her. She wasn't real I know she wasn't real.
"Come on Clem, you can talk to me, no one is around, and you're kind of quiet." She says and I look at her a bit.
"Is this how you felt? God I was such a bitch to you when it came to this." I say.
"If I'm going to be honest Clem, I did it to myself." She says.
"You're only saying this because you're in my head, it's what I want to hear not what you would actually say to me." I tell her.
"Remember when I talked to you about this?" She asked.
"Kind of." I mutter and took another drink and then coughed again and she laughed a bit.
"Clem, if you remember what I told you, then you should know you're fine." She says and I shake my head a bit and I took another drink.
"Sure, hope you aren't drinking because of me." I hear and looked to the clothes in the closet.
"I'm going to keep bothering you." She says and I sighed.
"Look, I just want to... it's sad that I want to forget you, because if I don't remember you then I can't mourn for you, I can forget you existed and I just hate how I feel right now." I tell her. I look to her and she was looking back to me.
"Am I going to be like you now?" I asked.
"No, God no, I'm not that important to you, I mean.... It might happen when you've drank basically a whole bottle of moonshine, which I'm glad I never told you where the still is, and I literally can't tell you even now." She says and I look to the ground and take a breath.
"I've gone crazy." I mutter and lay my head back on the bed.
"How do you think I felt?" She asked and I look to her as she looked to the wall a bit.
"Why am I acting like this?" I asked.
"I'm no expert but could be, because... I'm dead?" She asked.
"Great, a stupid reply to my stupid answer." I mutter and I sighed at this.
"I mean... it's because the fact that I am dead... I mean that I had to shoot myself." She laughed and I look at her in shock.
"Why the fuck are you laughing?" I asked her.
"I think you want me to laugh at something like this, because if you laugh, you think you're an asshole, so you have me to do it for you." She says.
"God I'm such a moron." I mutter and I take another drink and look to the wall.
"Look think about it, if you laugh you think you're a bad person, if you let me laugh at my death it's not so bad, plus I would laugh at my own death, honest." I hear her say and I look to the side and I look back to the wall then I hear the door open and I see Violet looking at me.
"Time for me to go for now." She says and I look to the door just as she was gone and I see Ruby and I look down.
"Clementine?" She asked and I look to the wall.
"Hey you, ok?" She asked.
"Drinking, thought I saw Violet but it was just her vest." I lied and look to the floor.
"I think you had enough." She tells me as she takes the whiskey bottle out of my hand and I grip it a bit and I place my other hand on top of it.
"I'm sorry but... I want to finish this." I mutter and look to Ruby.
"I don't think that you should." She says and I look to the bottle.
"I want to forget her, god I want to forget her so badly." I cried and placed the bottle to my forehead and I feel the tears.
"Clem, you shouldn't forget her, that's... that's a bit cruel to her don't you think?" I hear.
"How is that cruel? She makes me so angry." I say as I gripped the bottle neck.
"She made a lot of mistakes Clem but look at all the good she's done." I hear and I shake my head.
"She left me, she didn't have the fucking guts to say goodbye before she shot herself, she has no idea how I fucking feel, she... she fucking left me and I just want to forget she ever existed because then... then it'll stop." I mutter and I glare at the wall.
"Honey do you really want to forget her or is that the alcohol?" She asked and I think a bit.
"Maybe both." I mutter and hug the bottle to me and look to Ruby.
"Well, I see that you hate her because she left you." She says.
"Exactly, she left me, she left me, she didn't let me say goodbye, she decided to shoot herself and didn't let me do it." I say getting pissed and I feel the tears in my eyes.
"You're mad because she didn't let you shoot her?" She asked.
"Because I couldn't shoot Lee, she probably thought I was a damn baby, that I couldn't fucking do it." I say getting pissed off and I glare at the wall.
"You think she didn't want you to do it because, she didn't want you to see her being taken out that way?" She asked me and I felt more tears in my eyes and tried to wipe them away but they kept coming.
"I could have taken care of her, I... I should have, I should have told her I loved her more, I should have talked to her more, I should have held her as she left, I didn't treat her nice for God knows how long and she still thought I wasn't flawed in her eyes, for gods' sake Ruby she was the perfect woman, the perfect partner and she thought she was worthless." I cried and dropped the bottle.
"How could I do that to her after everything she's done." I cried and I feel her place her hand on my shoulder and I look at the floor and then grip my hands into fists.
"How could she think she was worthless?" I asked.
"Look I shouldn't tell you this Violet, had thought she was worthless because she lost Mary and Tenn, she didn't think she was a good parent, a good sister, a good partner because of all that happened, she told me that she once handed you a gun to shoot her if you were to leave Joans, she felt like she should work more to stay away from people, or she would lose them." Ruby says and I look to her.
"She... I... she wouldn't lose us." I mutter and I look down.
"She felt like she would, because in her mind she thought she had to be perfect but she saw that she never could be, and it made her angry at herself, I tried to tell her that she was a good person, but she couldn't believe in herself." Ruby says to me and I sighed.
"Guessing she thought I was a bitch hu?" I asked.
"Oh goodness no, she thought the world of you Clem, hell she said she wished she could have been more like you, she thought you were strong, brave, hell she said if she were to go back in time, she would search for you." Ruby tells me and I look at her.
"I swear it's true, she looked up to you so much, she tried to keep her emotions hidden but anger was the only one she could truly show, she was angry at herself more than anything... and I wish she talked to you about this but she didn't want you worry or even feel ashamed of her." She tells me.
"How could I feel ashamed of her?" I asked.
"Well, she thought you hated her with what happened at Joans."
"She didn't tell me about Joan and what she did and god I thought she was a monster when she kept us there but I didn't know because she didn't tell me." I say to Ruby and I sighed and grabbed the bottle from the floor and took a drink.
"Well, you aren't being belligerent so you can finish that but no more." She tells me and I nod.
"Not like I could drink anymore; Violet made her own still." I mutter.
"Hu, no wonder she was drinking a lot more." Ruby says and I look to her.
"Yeah... has a secret stash." I say as I finished the bottle and then set it down on the floor. I take a breath and look to the woman then to the wall and I rubbed my arm a bit.
"She got anymore?" Ruby asked and I nod.
"Six bottles, I'll probably save three of them." I tell her.
"For a rainy day?" Ruby asked and I shook my head.
"No just... to have something she made." I mutter.
"Maybe you could pour one out for her? Saw my dad do it at his father's grave." She tells me and I think.
"How about we all have a drink?" I asked her.
"Or we can do that... can you stand?" She asked and I nod as I stand up a bit and I lean on the bed. I was able to stand up fully and I go and grab a bottle from the closet and we head out to everyone and I take a seat with the bottle.
"Hey is that whiskey?" AJ asked and I shook my head.
"Nah it's moonshine, Violet's own making." I say and Ruby came out with some glasses and I smile as she comes over.
"Is it safe to drink?" Aasim asked and I nodded.
"Oh yeah, I just drank a whole bottle myself." I laughed and I handed the bottle to her and she poured some for everyone. The adults grabbed their glasses and I grabbed one myself and I look to AJ and handed him a glass.
"You sure?" He asked and I nodded.
"Sure, no harm plus I think she'd be ok with it." I say and he nods as he takes a drink and he couched at bit and we all laughed at this.
"Oh god, this is stronger than the beer Violet let me have." He says and I smile and took a drink.
"It's really good actually, you said Violet made this?" Omar asked and I nod.
"Yeah... she did... I always thought it was whiskey till she said something one day about going to work on a still, well she muttered it." I say and took another drink from my glass.
"I think we should make a toast or something." Aasim says and I think a bit.
"To Violet, she was one tough bitch." AJ says and I lift my glass up and laughed.
"Here, here." I say and we all took a drink.
"To Louis as well, man was a musical genius." Willy says and we take a drink.
"Wish we had some music." Aasim says and I think.
"AJ mind getting the... the um... god what is it?" I asked.
"CD Player?" He asked and I nod at this and snap my fingers.
"Yes, that." I say.
"Sure, be right back." He says and I nod as he leaves and I take another drink and Ruby pours me some more and I smiled at this. AJ comes back with the CD player and the music starts up. He then comes and takes a seat next to me and I hand him his glass and he takes another drink. I take another drink from my glass and I look to the others as we all chatted.
"Hey let's dance." I hear and look to see Aasim and Ruby dancing and I look to the ground as I hear them laughing.
"Hey wanna dance?" I hear and look to Minerva and I shake my head.
"Nah my leg is starting to hurt a bit." I tell her.
"Oh, need to take it off?" She asked and I nod and I look at my leg a bit and sighed as I take it off.
"She was a mighty fine craftsman." Minerva says and I chuckled.
"Yes, she was, oh god." I mutter as I look to the ground a bit.
"What's wrong?" She asked.
"What if my leg breaks? I can't fix the damn thing to save my life... and she was working on a new leg that I can't finish either." I say and sighed.
"Well, maybe I can help, Vi wanted me to know how to make a new arm for her just in case hers broke." AJ says and I look to him and I nod a bit.
"Sure, why not." I say and take another drink and I look to see Ruby and Aasim as they danced and I look away from them. We drank and talked till the sun came up and I look at the house a bit and I get up and fall flat on my face. I turn to look at the sky and laughed a bit as I place my hands to my chest. I look up to the sky and I think a bit.
"Hey need some help?" AJ asked and I waved him off.
"Nah, just... ok maybe." I say and he helped me up and he handed me my leg as I put it on.
"I'm just going to go into the house and I might get some sleep." I tell him.
"Sure, Oh Liz wants to go fishing again so I'm going to take her with Willy." AJ tells me.
"Oh ok." I say as he helped me up and into the house. I go to the couch and take a seat and look to the side and all I see is Violet's head turn to the side. I place my hand where her head was but I see that it was a pillow I placed my hand on and I sighed a bit.
"She's gone Clem, you know this, you're just... still drunk." I mutter as I lay my head back a bit and I rubbed my head a bit at this. I groan and then laid on the couch and looked to the ceiling and I place my arm on my face and hand on my chest.
"Two weeks and one day." I mutter and I groan a bit.
"Why am I mad? I shouldn't be mad at you Violet, I'm sorry, it's just... what the hell did you see in me? you never really argued with me, you tried what you could to make me happy, and I was just an asshole to you but I didn't mean to." I mutter and I gripped my shirt a bit.
"No, I'm allowed to be an asshole to you, you were just... broken." I mutter and sighed.
"What the hell am I saying? I'm not allowed to be an asshole to you... you're dead." I mutter.
"Funny thing about being dead, it sucks." I hear and look to see Violet.
"Still drunk." I mutter as I see her looking at me from her recliner.
"Look, I know you aren't going to really want to hear from me right now, which I get, the idea of me being here upsets you." She tells me.
"It upsets me that you are here, bothering me when I want to forget you." I tell her.
"That's fine, just means you need to stop drinking, for me." She says and I look at her and then away from her.
"I'll get drunk one last time... on my death bed." I joked and we both laughed at this and I look at her.
"Good, don't want to be a bother for you." She says and I look down.
"You were never a bother for me Violet, I'm sorry if I ever made you feel like that, I should have never made you feel like that, ever." I mutter and I look to her as she smiled softly at me.
"Darlin, if you were a bother, I would have told you when I was alive, you got to relax, I'm gone I ain't coming back, but... I'm at peace trust me, no more worrying about panic attacks, no more having to deal with my anger issues, my drunk rants, my suicidal tendency." She says and I look to the ground a bit.
"I... I just couldn't help you." I say.
"You did help me, this isn't in your head I'm being honest with you I had to have told you something related to this, Darlin, you did what you could do, I was just to far gone to be helped... I don't know what else to tell you other than, you'll be ok, you're Clementine Everett a living legend, a kick ass woman, who never let anything break her spirit, you are a strong woman, don't let my death be the one thing to finally make you give up." She tells me and I look at her.
"Don't let me be your downfall, you have AJ and the others, besides I was going to go anyway... people don't live forever, sorry I didn't grow old with you Clem, but hey, least I made it this far, right?" She asked and I feel the tears in my eyes and I look away from her.
"Fuck you and your... fucking sappy speeches." I mutter and I hear her laugh.
"That's why you love me." She says and I hold myself a bit.
"Darlin, please don't drink anymore, I don't want you to see me like this, when you're intoxicated, it's not healthy." She tells me and I sighed.
"Alright, I will stop the drinking... maybe a few here and there, but not enough to... you know." I say and look to the recliner to see her gone. I sighed and closed my eyes to try and get some form of sleep. It was another week and I was in Violet's workshop. I was looking at her booklet and to the leg as I tried to work on it but the pieces just didn't fit and I rubbed my head a bit.
"God damn it." I mutter as I look back to the book.
"Take your time, Violet always said to take your time when building your leg." AJ says and I look at him.
"I know, I know but... damn it I want to get my mind off things." I mutter.
"Need to talk?" He asked,
"... No, I don't need to." I mutter and get back to work and sighed.
"I think you do." He says and I look at him.
"Talk about what?" I asked and he thinks a bit.
"Anything, Violet and I would talk a lot when we worked together." He says and I look at the leg then back to him.
"What exactly?" I asked.
"Hmm, well for one she told me a funny joke." He says and I look at him and raise a brow at him.
"I know twenty-five letters of the alphabet. I just don't know y." He says and I smile a bit and laughed a bit.
"Oh god, that was good." I say.
"Got a million of them." He says and I smiled and worked on the leg a bit and I think.
"Did we bury Violet with her arm?" I asked.
"Of course... why?" He asked and I lean back a bit in the chair.
"Just wondering... you know I would joke with her about her grey hair." I tell him.
"Call her an old lady, and you're old too." He says and I laughed at this.
"Oh I remember when she use to..." I trailed off remembering AJ wasn't that found of PDA.
"What?" He asked. I look to him then to the leg again.
"When we lived here, before Joan, every morning when we woke up, she would always kiss me on my head, it might seem stupid but I thought it was sweet at the time, I missed that." I say to him and I clear my throat.
"Seems like you just miss all the romantic stuff." He says and I nod.
"Yeah... I do." I say and take a breath. I looked back to the leg and sighed as I get up.
"I can't make it work." I mutter and head on out. We both saw the others as they were chatting and I see a map so we go up to them.
"Hey, what's going on?" AJ asked and I look to the map a bit.
"We saw a group heading in this direction." Aasim says as he shows the path they were taking. They seem to be heading near us.
"You see anyone familiar in the group?" I asked.
"Not from what I could see, I wasn't going to get to close to them." Willy says and I nod at this. I don't blame him for not trying to look more into it. I sighed as we got everything ready and I went to the gate and looked at it. The sheet metal acting as a closed door, not really able to see through it, which did us good in some way, but that's fine, it kept whatever Walkers out. I keep looking at the gate for a long time before I feel a hand on my shoulder and I turn to see Omar and I sighed.
"Sorry." I say quietly.
"And what do you need to be sorry for?" He asked.
"No idea if I'm going to be honest with you." I tell him and I look to the gate again. We walked away and I look to the table as they still had the map out and I look at it. It's all I could do, no point in actually trying anything. It wasn't long till there was a knock at the gate.
"Clem?" We hear and I knew it was Javier. The gate was opened and I look up from the table to see said man along with the others. I look back to the table and I take a breath and looked to AJ and smiled.
"I'm going to go lay down." I tell him.
"Yeah, sure... are you going to visit Vi?" He asked quietly and I nod.
"Yeah, before I head to lay down." I say and I get up and walk to the house.
"No hello?" Javier asked and I look to him then to the house and I walk inside. I head through the back door so I wouldn't be bothered and I take a seat right next to Violet's grave. I sighed as I look to the flowers AJ and I placed on the grave today and I placed my hand on the cross and I look to it a bit.
"Should put some stuff on the wood... make it last longer." I mutter and then looked to the two delapitaded crosses on the other side of the house.
"Funny, didn't think to bury you next to your mom and dad, though I don't think you would have liked that." I say and chuckled a bit at the fact that I'm thinking about this now.
"Hmm... I'll be back tonight, Javier and the others are here, and I really don't want them to bother me right now." I say then I get up and walk back inside. I go and lay on the couch covering myself with a blanket and I laying my head on the pillow. I did fall asleep but it seems to have been short lived when I was woken up by someone knocking on my door and I sit up still tired.
"Clem." I hear and groaned a bit as I get up and groan a bit as I go and answer the door.
"Yes Javier?" I asked.
"Come out and talk to us, why are you so down?" He asked and I look to the others as they looked away from me and I sighed.
"It's none of your business, I'm just tired." I tell him.
"Did someone die or something?" He asked and I feel the tears prick the corner of my eyes. How dare he say something like that.
"Oh... oh geez Clem I-." I shove him away and glare at him.
"You didn't give a damn about her, don't say you're sorry.... I know you don't mean it." I tell him as he looked to me.
"Wait... Violet is dead? That's why you're crying?" He asked and I glare at him.
"Javier." I hear and look to David as he looked to me.
"What, the one person who cause us and her problems-."
"They lost a loved one Javie, do not speak ill of the dead, especially about someone's spouse, you wouldn't have like it if someone said something bad about Papa." David says.
"Papa, didn't kidnap people and forc-."
"JAVIER!" David yelled as the man walked up to us.
"You will let people mourn for their lost ones; you have no right." He says to his brother.
"But she-."
"That is enough brother, we are not going to argue anymore." He tells his younger brother and I look to David as he looked to me.
"Seriously after what that-."
"You can leave." I tell Javier and he looked to me.
"What?" He asked.
"You know you use to be kind and caring, I was there when Mariana died, I didn't know her but I dug her grave for you, I didn't say anything bad about her, no I helped you get revenge on the group that took her away from you... and when Gabe died, I still didn't say anything bad, he was a stupid kid he didn't always tell the truth, after what happened with Conrad too, but I still didn't speak badly about him." I tell him as I get off the porch.
"I don't care if you didn't like Violet, but you can do one decent thing and shut your mouth, while you are here, you don't know what she had been dealing with.... What I'm dealing with." I tell him and I take a breath.
"But-."
"There are no buts, we didn't have to let you in." AJ says as he comes over.
"And I will not have you talk bad about Violet, I am done with your shit, I am done with everyone's bullshit with Violet, she's gone, she's dead, she did so much for all of us even when we didn't do enough for her." AJ says and I look to him as he stood in front of Javier.
"If you say one more thing about Violet, I'll kick your ass out myself." He threatened and Javier keeps his mouth shut. He walked away and I take a breath and saw that David was still by us and I look to him as he looked to me.
"Sorry for your loss." He says and I just nod to him and look to AJ.
"You doing, ok?" He asked and I look to Javier and then back to him and I nod.
"Just.... Dealing with it." I say and I head back inside.
"They shouldn't be here long, I heard they were just passing though, it's only one night." He says and I look to him.
"Hope so." I say as I take a seat and sighed as I took my leg off.
"Leg being a bother?" He asked and I nod.
"Yeah, but it's fine." I tell him and he sighs.
"Keep the leg off for a few days, I'll fix this as best as I can." He says as he takes my leg.
"Fine, fine." I wave him off and I look at him.
"I'll try and make it as good as Violet made it." He says as he walked away and I sighed and pulled out the photo from my pocket and I look at it. I shouldn't be feeling like this, I know Violet once said it was ok for me to feel down, but this was way worse, the pain I'm feeling, was this what Violet felt? Was this what everyone felt? I hate this emotion, it's showing weakness.
"God damn it." I mutter and set the photo back into my pocket and I look to the cane at the side of the couch. I grabbed it and held it in both hands. It was Lee's dads, the fact that I've had it all these years I never really used it as much. I groan a bit as I stand up and use the cane to help me. I walked out and down the stairs and went over to everyone.
"I'm sorry for your losses." Kate says and I look to her.
"They told us of Louis, and I heard about Violet." She tells me and I nod.
"Hm, Violet like you out of your group... funny." I say as I take a seat.
"Yeah, not the most... reliable person I suppose." She says.
"She said you helped her with her leg." I say and she nods.
"I didn't like how David and Javie treated her and her group, they really didn't do us harm but we were scared, and I was scared when I heard Joan on the radio." She tells me.
"Well, she's gone now, Violet made sure of that." I tell her.
"I know... still I am sorry." She says and I nod again. It was starting to become to quiet so I get up and I decided to head back to Violets grave where I see David looking at it. He then turns to look at me and then back to the grave.
"What are you doing?" I asked.
"Just wanted to pay my respects to a fellow solider." He says.
"Funny, you didn't think of her as one." I say as I go up to him.
"At first no, then I saw how she changed, couldn't imagine all that she went through, and if I'm going to be honest, everyone at some point in this world has to become a solider, or warrior, defending their home, dealing with the tough choices, having to survive against the Walkers, and even the living." He says and I think a bit.
"Have you guy's been to Austin?" I asked.
"No why?" He asked.
"Should have guessed." I say quietly.
"Something wrong there?" He asked.
"Ran into Elenor." I tell him.
"Excuse me?" He asked and I look at him.
"Elenor, she's still alive... and Linguard... they haven't been letting the dead stay dead." I tell him.
"Explain, please." He says and I do just that. I told him about how we had to leave our home for a short while due to Luke busting down our gate, how Violet died too.
"Damn... that... must have been painful." He says and I nod.
"I should leave you be, again sorry." He says and I nod again as he leaves and I take a seat and looked to the cross. I was coming to the grave a lot today, why today of all days? Maybe I just needed to see that she was gone? I have no idea. It's strange when I don't know why. Time would pass us by quickly and Javier and his group left and David was nice and gave us some supplies in exchange for some vegetables from our garden. Another week would pass and I felt more like shit and I just didn't want to do anything.
"Hey Clem I got the leg fixed." I hear and I look to AJ as he comes up to me with the leg and I take it from him gently and look to it.
"You should come out more, you've been held up in here for two days." He says and I look at him.
"Two days?" I asked and he nods a bit and I look back to the leg.
"I know it's close to yours and Violet's anniversary but-."
"Wait it is?" I asked as I look to him and he looked to me.
"I forgot... I can't believe I forgot." I say and run my hand through my hair.
"Shit, I mean you two didn't really celebrate it but I just thought." He tried to say.
"No, no it's ok AJ, I just... you're right we didn't really celebrate it." I say to him.
"Well... let's celebrate it?" He asked and I look at him.
"Yeah, make it a day with family, we can go out the gate for a bit, just you, me and... maybe Liz?" He asked and I look to my leg and I nod.
"Yeah, yeah let's do that, make it a nice day, not a sad day." I say to him and he smiled and so did I. we then made a plan of what we will do and I loved the idea.