Entry 57: February 11, 2015
It had been a total of two weeks since Jaime and I had that moment where we were both a bit confused, I don't know what happened but that next morning he blew up my phone with text messages saying how much he loved me and how he needed me in his life. That itself was enough for me to stop being upset about the whole ordeal and just be happy that I have him in my life.
We ended up talking it out and realized that as much as we want to talk to each other all the time he's busy, and with my new job I get busy too. But he still manages to text me every now and again through the day just to say something goofy like a joke or cheesy pick up line.
I guess our relationship is still so new, especially with the touring, we have those moments of just wanting to be around each other, if that makes sense. If not oh well I understand it.
But I guess I should be going, gotta go pack for Massachusetts!
Arianna Rae
I got off the bed and placed the journal back into my drawer then began packing my large sized suitcase with enough clothes for four days, and maybe some extras just in case, because you can never be so sure.
The girls and I decided it would be a good idea to surprise the guys in Massachusetts for Valentine's Day Saturday, and I couldn't be any more excited. I needed to see Jaime, it isn't just I miss him anymore, it's I need him.
After everything that happened two weeks ago all I want to do is hug and kiss him and tell him how much I love him, in person.
I finished piling clothes into the suitcase and laid out what I was going to where during the flight on the chair across the room then began packing my toiletries into a separate duffle bag, it's so tough being a girl sometimes.
I finished then realized it was time to take Max over to Austin's house for the next few days, knowing I'm leaving him in good hands.
When we decided that were definitely going to surprise the guys I sent a group text between Austin, Chris and I telling them the details and leaving it up to them to decide who got to dog sit Max, which resulted in Austin winning.
I packed up Max's bowls, toys and bed then drove over to Austin's with Max crawling everywhere in the car out of excitement.
I pulled up to the town home and walked up to the door with Max following me closely.
"Hey!" Austin shouts answering the door.
"I brought your favorite dog." I say in a sing song tone.
"Yes! I've been waiting for this; I'm so excited to have a dog around." He exclaims picking Max up and curling him into his arms.
"Well have fun, this is all his stuff, food, toys et cetra." I say placing the bag of things on his black leather couch.
"So when are you coming back?"
"I'll be flying back in on Sunday, I should be here around three maybe? Then I'll come pick him up." I explain.
"Sounds like a plan; I'll call and let you know if anything is needed." He smiles while scratching Max's head.
I place a kiss on Max's head and walk out the door and back home to where all my friends are waiting to stay the night.
---
We woke up deathly early this morning, and may I remind you I'm not a morning person what so ever, so I was a bit on the cranky side.
"Does everyone have everything?" Spencer asks as we each file out of the house.
I grumble a response while Alysha and Danielle throw a thumbs up symbol just as I shut and lock the door, too late now.
We make our way to the airport and were waiting for the intercom to announce our flight when I got a text from Jaime.
Jaime: Have a good day at work baby, wish you were here right now. Love you always.
I stifled a laugh at the fact that he doesn't know he'll be seeing me in just a few hours and sent a text back keeping up my work decoy.
Arianna: I know I wish I could be there too, but I'll text you after work these customers are being so demanding. (Long face emoji)
"Now boarding Flight 277 to Lowell, Massachusetts."
I grabbed my carry on and followed the girls to the gate giving my ticket to the lady and walking down the ramp and to the plane.
"This flight better be fast because I need my turtle." Spencer mutters placing her bag in the cubby over our seats.
"I know they better pedal to the metal.'" I say taking my seat by the window.
"Girls look over here." Alysha says pointing her front face camera in our direction getting us all in the shot and snapping the photo just as the attendant told us to turn off the electronics.
"If only I could post this, we look tiredly cute." Alysha whines looking at the picture.
We turn off our phones and buckle our seats as the pilot comes over the speaker telling us the precautions and what to do in case of emergency.
After fifteen minutes of hearing them talk the plane finally set in motion and I couldn't help but feel the butterflies take off in my stomach at the thought of seeing Jaime again.
"Rae, wake up we're landing." I hear Spencer say while shaking me lightly.
The plane lands safely in the terminal and I unbuckle my seatbelt then grab my purse from the floor while Spencer takes out our carryon bags.
We walked out to the baggage claim and impatiently waited for our suitcases; once we got them Danielle called a cab and told them what hotel we were headed to. Then I decided to text Jaime and confuse him a bit.
Arianna: Oh my gosh it's so cold here. (Snowflake emoji)
Jaime: Huh? California is not that cold.
We pull up to the hotel and grab our luggage from the back of the cab and then pay the driver. We stayed in the lobby while Alysha texted Casey to see what room they were staying in, then felt my phone vibrate again with two new texts.
Jaime: The weather over there is like 86 degrees, what are you talking about you weirdo?
Jaime: Are you in Narnia??!!
I bust out in laughter at the last text and place the phone back in my pocket while Alysha leads us to the elevator with the room number in mind.
The nerves settling in and butterflies threatening to explode as the doors open and we begin our walk to the room they were in.
Jaime: Did you get locked in the freezer, where are you?
I stopped and replied quickly before Spencer knocked on the door,
Arianna: Here.
Spencer knocked loudly getting the door to fly open and Vic's face to resemble one in pure shock.
"Holy shit!" He exclaimed opening the door widely and taking Danielle into his arms.
"What's going on?" I heard Jaime say as I rolled my suitcase with me behind the other girls.
As soon as I saw Jaime I dropped my bags and ran the short distance to him and jumped into his embrace having him spin me around a few times as I clutched onto him tightly.
"Oh my God I can't believe you're here!" He exclaims into my neck before setting me down on my feet and smothering my face in kisses.
"That's why you told me it was cold!" He says in realization.
"You didn't really think I'd travel to Narnia without my boyfriend did you?" I say wrapping my arms around his torso and reaching up to place a kiss on his cheek.
Jaime wrapped his arms around me and squeezed me making all the butterflies tingle in my stomach before letting go and draping his arm around my shoulders.
"Well since the girls are here let's go grab a bite to eat then sightsee?" Vic suggests still holding onto Danielle tightly.
We all agree, equally hungry, and head down the elevator to the lobby. I pull my jacket tightly around my body and adjust the scarf around my neck to warm myself up while the guys get in the van, Jaime and I being last to climb on.
We drive a good forty-five minutes to Boston and choose to eat at the Hard Rock Café for lunch then spend the day here since some of us have never been.
We sat down at the long table the waiters prepared for us and began looking over the menu, everyone talking amongst themselves while deciding if it were too early to get a beer. Mike being the person to tell them it's never too early to have a beer.
I feel Jaime lean closer towards me and feel his breath touch my ear as he whispers into it, "So glad you're here right now."
I turn to look at him and smile placing my hand on his cheek and caressing it gently then lean in to plant a kiss onto his lips.
"I'm glad I'm here too."
We ordered our food and listened intently at some of the tour stories going around the table, laughing at some of the most ridiculous things that happen.
"Yeah so I was putting things away into the storage under the bus," Drew, the merch guy begins.
"And when I walked around to the other side I found two girls trying to press in the code to the bus doors key pad." He laughs while giving himself a face palm.
"I walked over behind them and they didn't even notice me, I stood behind them watching the different codes they were trying to put in and then I just said "You're way off." Man you should've seen their faces."
We all laugh at his mocking facial expression, "These fans can get a bit rebellious."
"But not as crazy as the ones that can literally stand in line for hours in the cold." Tony chimes in.
"That's not crazy, that's pure dedication." Spencer corrects.
We finish up our lunch and each go our separate ways to sightsee, agreeing to meet at the van around six for dinner.
Jaime and I walked around for hours looking at the statues and old buildings; of course I took millions of pictures not knowing when I'll ever come back.
"Come here Hime!" I semi-shout then pull him next to me to stand in front of the Boston Common statue of Paul Revere.
I snap a picture of us and send it Instagram then walk further down the trail with my hand tightly intertwined with Jaime's, as if I'd lose him if I let go. We ended up sitting next to a fairly large water fountain and talk for what seemed to be hours about how touring has been and how I've been back at home.
"Have I ever told you how much I love you?" I say leaning my head on his shoulder.
"Yes but I love to hear it over and over again." He chuckles.
"Well I love you, very very much." I smile while squeezing his hand in reassurance.
"When I met you I didn't think you'd be this important to me." I hear him say while he begins to play with my fingers.
I pick my head up to look at him and when I do our eyes meet and we lock our gazes toward each other, not saying a word but taking in each other's presence.
I take in all his features for the first time since I got here and get each and every one burned into my memory so I can think about when I miss him.
"You are literal perfection, and the most beautiful girl I've ever seen in my life."
"You make my heart so crazy." I giggle while pulling his face down to mold his lips onto mine.
We stay there for a little while longer then head back to the van, meeting up with everyone else, and then going to eat at another restaurant down the street from the hotel we're staying at.
Jaime insisted on getting our own room for the night so we could be alone, of course everyone threw us smirks only for me to blush and turn red at their assumptions. But once we got up to our floor and shut the door we put the assumptions to rest and took the moment to another level, getting lost in each other like it were the first time.
---
My alarm rang through my phones speaker making me jolt from sleep; I turned to my side to see that the spot once taken by Jaime was empty; I rolled out of bed and walked to the bathroom with my eyes barely open.
I finished washing up and went to rummage through my suitcase for something warm to wear for the day before the guys' show, I settled for light blue jeans, my red converse and a black ACDC shirt covered by my red sweater.
I straightened my hair with Jaime's straightener then placed a black Amish hat on top of my head completing the look perfectly.
I was humming along with the music playing from my phone when I got a text from Jaime,
Jaime: Good morning gorgeous, there's a surprise for you in the second drawer of the dresser.
I furrowed my eyebrows together then walked over to the dresser opening the second drawer from the top and was met with an envelope attached to a box of chocolates; next to it was a single red rose and a tiny teddy bear holding a heart that read "I love you".
I smiled so hard my cheeks began to hurt; I took the items out of the drawer and opened up the envelope to the letter then pulled it out and began to read what it said.
Arianna,
The words to express my love for you are entirely out of this world, because you make me so speechless it's ridiculous, and you know how much I love to talk!
I have never looked at someone and fell in love each time over and over again, but with you it happens every second of the day.
I remember waking up in your room at Spencer's, your face was the first thing I saw and I knew deep down that looking at you right then was the first time I saw love, real love. Not the fake love you see in movies or in some high school relationships that you know will end after a few months.
And now I feel KNOW that your love is the last I need. When the world is coming down on me, I know that I have your love and that's enough to push me through the storm.
I didn't fall in love with you because I was lonely, or lost. I fell in love with you because when I saw you for the first time it was the only time that I had ever wanted to make someone a permanent part of my world.
I could go on and on about how much I love you but that would take ages, just know that I love you so much and always will.
Till the end.
-Jaime
P.S. Happy Valentine's Day baby
I feel tears fall down my cheeks and brush them away with the back of my hand then stare at the letter again rereading it and letting the words sink in.
I hear a knock at the door and quickly put the letter and things onto the desk next to the TV and walk over to the door and open it to see the girls standing on the other side dressed and ready to meet the guys at their sound check.
We got to the venue and went straight to the stage and saw the guys tuning their guitars while Vic was tapping on the microphone to make sure it was working.
I ran up behind Jaime and covered his eyes startling him for just a second before he relaxed and smiled, "Cotton candy lotion, and coconut shampoo, it must be Hayley Williams!"
I pull my hands off his eyes as he turns to look at me, I cross my arms over my chest and fake a mock hurt, just like the day we went to the mall for the first time.
"In reality I look nothing like her." I correct pulling a smile from him.
"You're right. You're more beautiful." He says pulling me into his chest and placing a kiss on my lips.
"I thought I'd steal you away for lunch before Mark comes in and ruins everything." I laugh.
"Sounds like a good idea because I'm starving."
We walked down the street and found a Chipotle just as we were talking about how much I wanted a burrito, coincidence? I think not.
As soon as I got my burrito I ate it like I'd never have another in my life, "Babe put your sunglasses on." Jaime interrupts.
"Why?" I whine.
"Because they're rad as hell." He laughs.
I pull out my circle sunglasses and place them on my face when I got a text from Sarah,
Sarah: People are demanding lunch at 10 am. They better get to McDonalds with that shit! Lol
I laughed at the text then saw an Instagram notification saying Jaime had tagged me in a photo; I looked over to him and glared wondering what on earth he tagged me in.
It was of me just seconds ago smiling down at my phone from what Sarah had sent me,
ptvjaime: Valentine's Chipotle lunch with the most beautiful girl in town @theariannarae (Floating hearts emoji)
"Aw babe, you think I'm beautiful." I say in a baby voice.
"The most beautifulest." He replies with a laugh.
We finished up our lunch then walked back to the venue being the only ones there while everyone was probably still at lunch. I sat on a case that was on the floor of arena and watched as Jaime walked the short distance to the stage and grabbed Vic's acoustic guitar from the stand then walked back to where I was sitting.
"Can I play you a song?" He asks tuning it a bit.
"I would love nothing more." I smile.
"When your legs don't work like they used to before." He begins strumming away on the guitar.
"And I can't sweep you off of your feet.
Will your mouth still remember the taste of my love?
Will your eyes still smile from your cheeks?
And, darling, I will be loving you 'til we're seventy.
And, baby, my heart could still fall as hard at twenty-three.
And I'm thinking 'bout how people fall in love in mysterious ways,
Maybe just the touch of a hand.
Well, me - I fall in love with you every single day
And I just wanna tell you I am."
I can't help but smile and watch him strum with his eyes closed and voice ringing out and through the entire venue, the words echoing perfectly in the empty room.
"So, baby, now
Take me into your loving arms.
Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars.
Oh, darling, place your head on my beating heart.
I'm thinking out loud.
Maybe we found love right where we are,
Oh, baby, we found love right where we are,
And we found love right where we are."
When he finishes I get up from my spot and wrap my arms around his neck and smash my lips onto his in a gentle but needed kiss.
"Thank you." I whisper.
"I love you." He leans his forehead against mine and stares into my eyes.
"I love you too.
---
The day I've been dreading, Sunday. The day I have to leave Pennsylvania, the cold weather, and importantly, Jaime.
I rolled my suitcase behind me and walked with Jaime, Tony and Spencer down to our cab where the guys were going to take me and Spencer to the airport.
The other girls decided to stay an extra day, but seeing as Spencer and I have work tomorrow we had to leave and get back in time to rest off the jet lag we'll be sure to get from this flight.
We made it to the airport and successfully checked our luggage in and went to the metal detector line where it was time for Jaime and Tony to leave and we had to return to reality of working girls.
I turned to Jaime and wrapped my arms around his torso tightly, feeling him do the same with his. I took in the scent and warmth of his body before reaching up and kissing him deeply on the lips lingering there for a moment, not wanting to pull away in fear of feeling the coldness of the disconnection come into play on my lips.
But of course time wouldn't stop for just a second and I felt myself slowly disconnecting our lips then the coldness crept in. I looked into his chocolate brown eyes and placed my cold hands on his cheeks caressing them softly.
"I love you." I whisper only loud enough for us to hear.
"I love you more, call me when you land." He replies.
I nod my head in agreement and kiss him one last time before taking the handle to my carryon and wheeling it to the metal detector waving one last time to Jaime before following Spencer to our gate number.
[Don't get upset at how rushed this chapter is, and if it doesn't feel like it to you then it's obviously just me lol but it's true this is probably the worst chapter I've written but I made up for it by all the fluff it has.
So next chapter will be a time jump, so don't be surprised when you see it hahaha.
This update is in honor of the new PTV song The Divine Zero, such a beautiful song. If you haven't heard it, which I'm sure you have, the video will be to the side or at the beginning of the chapter.
Please leave a comment and vote if you enjoyed reading this, because I absolutely love writing it for you guys.
I love you all!
-Adri]
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