Hey.
It's a bit late, but life happens; you know how it is. I might be a bit slower for a bit, but not by much.
It's been a hectic and sad few months, but don't worry, no story will be unfinished!
Let us get back to it.
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Back on Azur Lane in the Royal Navy quarters.
"Has she come out yet?"
"*Sigh* No..."
"Well, she can't stay in there forever," The Admiral stated to King George, knocking on Queen Elizabeth's door.
Belfast, Cheshire, Sirus, Sheffield and Valiant watched from the sidelines as the Admiral demanded to see their absent queen.
"Go away!"
The Admiral rolled his eyes when he heard the muffled voice of the queen. "Yeah... Not happening, missy," Before any of the girls could understand what he said or stop him, he reached for the door and went inside.
"Admiral!" They all shouted.
All of them followed the Admiral into the room and joined him, staring at the pitiful sight of Queen Elizabeth laying on her bed holding the envelope she offered Kohaku and could see she had been crying.
"Oh, for god's sake, really?" The Admiral snorted, throwing his arms in the air, and the girls behind glared at him for his lack of sensitivity.
"Admiral... A bit of sympathy wouldn't hurt, would it?" King George hinted politely.
"The Admiral is very impolite," Sheffield looked at the Admiral with a cold face.
The others didn't comment, but they shook their heads in disapproval. None of this was missed by the queen, who looked at them with puffy red eyes from her position on the large bed.
"I told you to go away!" Elizabeth shouted and pointed at the Admiral.
"And I told you to be at the docks when the other fleets arrived, but you didn't," The Admiral countered and crossed his arms, looking down at Elizabeth like a scolding parent.
Jumping up and standing on her bed, waving the envelope in front of the Admiral's face, "Can't you see how heartbroken I am?! I have been rejected... Me! A queen!"
"So?" The Admiral quirked a single brow at her, far from amused at her attitude.
"SO?!" Elizabeth shouts indignantly.
"Grow up, girl. Your idea of gaining his favour was a letter?" Admiral snorts at her, earning him an open-mouth stare from the queen and her servants in the room.
"I..."
"You think he would read your letter and fall deeply in love with you? Like a cheesy romcom, the stars align, and you skip happily into the sunset holding hands?"
"..."
"I get it, you're not exactly used to dealing with the opposite sex, but don't believe those ridiculous romance films I know you are watching; life isn't even close to being like that."
"What do you mean, Admiral?"
The Admiral turned in surprise. The speaker was Belfast, looking at him with an uncomfortable intensity.
"Yes, Admiral, please? We are all curious to know how to... Handle a real romantic encounter should it arise," The soft voice of Hood catches everyone's attention as Hood walks in with a playful and curious smile.
He looked around and noticed every Kansen in the room staring at him with intrigue, curiosity, hope and a desire to know more.
"Come on, old man Admiral, tell us how to court a man, Meow!" Cheshire creeps closer to the Admiral.
The Admiral groans, knowing he's made a mistake. These emotional and touch-starved Shipgirls would jump at any opportunity to understand romance.
"Wait!" Everyone turns to Valiant, "Let's get the others before the Admiral teaches us!"
"Wha? Hold on, I never said I would teach you anything..." The Admiral sweats at their stares.
"Grab him!" Elizabeth commands as she points at the sweating man.
"Hold on, AH!"
The Admiral was 'escorted' out of the queen's room to an unknown location, followed by every Kansen they encountered.
Word would spread fast...
- - - - - - - - - -
"You shouldn't get too close to him, Comrade Commander."
Fubuki pressed a cold pack to the unconscious Kohaku's nose as she sat at his bedside deep inside Gangut's ship in the medical bay, her eyes drifting to the chains her escort Kansen wrapped around Kohaku's ankles and wrists tightly to prevent any funny business.
Not that the chains were necessary, with Gangut refusing to leave her side.
Fubuki looked at Gangut with a scolding glare, "Did you have to smack him so hard?"
"Da..."
"No! No, you didn't!" Fubuki snapped at her.
"If I hadn't arrived when I did, comrade?"
The open question shut Fubuki up, and looked away from Gangut. The answer was not something Fubuki wanted to dwell on.
"I told you... Something was wrong with him."
"Da! He's in a rut," Gangut answered Fubuki's unanswered question.
Fubuki's head snapped to Gangut, "What? Rut?"
"Da."
"Like what animals go through?"
Gangut smiled, walked to the bed, grabbed one of Kohaku's frazzled tails, and waved it in Fubuki's face, "Da, comrade."
"Gah! I get it, I get it, geez!" Fubuki fell to the floor, spitting out strands of floof.
"I don't think you do. He's a kitsune, not a human."
"If you knew he was in a rut, why did you hit him?!"
"His lack of self-control was... Lacking," Gangut's words were not as deep as she thought, but the smile she gave her Commander was not one of happiness.
"It... It was my fault," Fubuki mumbled and again sat at Kohaku's side.
"Comrade? Explain?"
"Well... Don't get mad, but... I thought he was just super attracted to me and horny like most guys are... sooo... I may or may not have been teasing him..." Fubuki nervously chuckled.
Gangut stared flatly at her.
"Gangut?"
"...There is no future for those who mistake ignorance for a bit of fun, comrade."
"Well, I didn't know he was in a rut!"
"But you could tell something was wrong, yet you still poked the sleeping bear?" Gangut asked sternly, staring down the shamefaced Commander.
"..."
"You're lucky... Kansen aren't humans, comrade Commander! He would have ripped your weak human body apart."
"I'm sorry," Fubuki mumbles, finding her lap interesting.
"Not me you should be apologizing to."
Gangut looks at Kohaku with a hint of sympathy, at least understanding he wasn't wholly to blame for this mess.
"*Sniffles* Can shipgirls tell if he's in a rut?"
Looking back at the quietly sniffling Commander with a hint of surprise at her question, "Da! I can smell it; I'm sure all shipgirls can."
Fubuki looks up at Gangut with red eyes, "How does it smell?"
"Hueheheh, like a cold December morning in the gulag!" Gangut takes a deep breath and grins.
"W-what? Gangut, are you blushing, or have you been drinking again?"
"Nyet! He smells like the north."
"The smell is unique and affects everyone differently then?"
"Da, his unique smell attracts all Kansen to some degree, but only the Kansen with animal features would be almost controllable around him."
"Like other Kansen, such as Lady Shinano and Musashi?" Fubuki asked, very interested in the topic.
No such course or information existed at the Naval Academy. All her years at the Academy, and this was the first time she heard about any of this. Such information could be invaluable to understanding her starter ship.
"Hmmm, Da! Fox girls would go wild for him, heh..."
"What about humans?"
Gangut stared at Fubuki strangely, but a smile grew on her pretty face. "Oh? Asking for a friend, comrade? heheh..."
Fubuki blushed and shook her head in denial.
"From what I understand, the human sense of smell is rather poor compared to ours, but I don't know if humans are affected by a male Kansens rut... It's not exactly a common situation, comrade." Gangut offered any info she could but just shrugged helplessly.
Fubuki was going to ask more, but Gangut grabbed her arm and pulled her away from Kohaku and out the door.
"What? Hey!" Fubuki yelped, caught off guard.
"Ships approaching, comrade Commander!"
- - - - - - - - - -
The Admiral wanted to cry... This was not what he was paid for!
He was standing on the wooden stage of Azur Lane's largest meeting auditorium and writing on one of his many set-up whiteboards, which, at this point, he was running out of space.
He was an Admiral, not a daman school teacher! Why was he even teaching them any of this romance crap?! And why were they all here? He was only meant to be talking to Queen Elizabeth and the Royal Navy, not every damn Shipgirl on base.
The Admiral could feel the eyes of almost every Shipgirl on Azur Lane in this room. Eagle Union, Royal Navy, Sakura Empire, Iron Blood and others sat in their sections, taking notes dutifully.
He would admit the girls make good students, very polite and quiet but very curious, some more than others, so groaning internally, he turns from his writing, hearing the same person's hand rise for the 10th time.
"Yes, Z23? You have a question?"
Z23 sheepishly lowered her hand, "You mentioned giving a man flowers? From our previous lessons on humans, men don't generally like flowers as gifts?"
"Good question, Z23!" Z23 smiles bashfully at the compliment, "The answer is simple: men DO like flowers, but not in the same context as many women."
The large group of Kansen murmured to each other.
"Can you elaborate further, Admiral?" Nagato asked politely.
"Of course... Don't give a man a bouquet. That's too much for him and will make it awkward. Instead, give him a single flower." Admiral writes it down on the board, and they all copy him in their notebooks.
"Why a single flower, Admiral?" Amagi asks with a smile, watching proudly as Akagi and Kaga write everything down in their little notebooks. Not at all forced by Amagi to sit down and write everything down as some form of punishment.
"Simple, most men will never receive a flower in their lifetime. Only in death will they be given flowers. You don't understand how meaningful a simple gesture like a flower could be to a man."
All the Shipgirls scribble that down.
"Now, back at the topic at hand, as previously mentioned, men are far more blunt in their emotions, not afraid to be honest, so bear that in mind when you ask for their opinions. You might not like the answer."
"Even if we ask, 'Do we look good?'" Hood asks, sipping her tea.
"Depends, honestly," The Admiral shrugged.
"On?" Warspite butts in.
"Do you look good in that moment? Are you wearing something too revealing? There are many factors at work here, ladies. A man is not obligated to lie to you because you think it will make you feel better."
More murmurs and scribbles from the crowd.
"What if the man in question was an enemy, but I wanted his approval?" A voice at the back of the room called out.
The Admiral stops writing and turns to the speaker, seeing the person who spoke with a raised hand sitting with a bunch of people he didn't recognize, but his eyes weren't as good as they used to be.
The speaker had very long light purple hair and glowing yellow eyes and wore a sailor outfit. The most striking feature was the crooked moustache she was wearing. All the other girls in her row had glowing eyes and wore moustaches.
Sort of like Sirens...
He still narrowed his eyes at the figure, "I don't recognize you, miss?"
"Purif-Ow!... Purina from the Admiralty, Admiral" Not Purifier, salutes mockingly before rubbing her ribs as the familiar form of Observer elbows her for her almost mistake.
"Hmmm..."
Purifier and the other Sirens smile at the suspicious Admiral, but their smiles look more deranged than pretty and warm.
"Whatever, not like they're asking about our secrets," The Admiral mumbles.
"Hehe... My question, Admiral?" Disguised, Purifier asks rather politely.
"*Sigh* There have been many cases of love blooming on the battlefield; most end poorly, but if both sides commit to each other, then their best option is to run and never allow themselves to be found."
"Ahahaha, so If I make Kohaku fall in love with me, we can elope like a silly human love story?" Purifier giggles.
The Admiral groans again. The poorly concealed Siren did that on purpose. The response to her words was instant.
Most of the Shipgirls started shouting at Purifier.
Some Shipgirls tried calming others down and being the voice of reason, like Yorktown, Amagi, Nagato, Hipper and Hood. Still, girls like Akagi, Kaga, Roon, Taiho, Z23, Prinz Eugen, Queen Elizabeth and Warpite were furious at the undercover Siren's words.
"Wait...!" Kawakaze stood, narrowing her eyes at the group at the back.
"Kawakaze? What's wrong?" Nagato asks, standing up.
"SIRENS!" Kawakaze shouted as she pointed at Purifier and her group.
The Admiral could only stare blankly as the room erupted in chaos and furious shouts as the Sirens laughed at the stampede of furious Shipgirls climbing over seats to get to them and activate their riggings.
The Siren's poor disguises were done on purpose. They wanted to be found, to cause a scene.
"Looks like even Sirens get bored. They want to have a bit of fun..." The Admiral theorizes as the room turns into a battlefield.
"Akagi, Kaga, don't launch your planes inside!" Amagi scolds them loudly over the noise.
The Admiral chuckles in despair.
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Done!
It's about time Queeny left her room and did something other than mope around off-screen.
Queeny will get some love eventually.
Poor Kohaku, punched in the nose...It's a nasty place to get smacked by a battleship with OP-level strength.
Surprised he has a nose left.
Did I say poor Kohaku? I meant Poor Admiral, pulled into a room to teach all the girls about love and courtship.
I get that Siren's being there with moustaches as disguises is silly, but that's the point! I could have just had them be invisible with their tech and not get detected, but like in the chapter, they wanted to be discovered and cause problems.
They also learn a bit about romance and courting from an actual human and not just human media—a win-win for them.
I own no Art or Gif's
Thanks for the support and votes!
Zero-