It is a nightmare after all..
It had to be..
I knew I was laid on the bed..and the softness made me realise it was Adonis's bed..
I could hear muffled voices..I couldn't understand what they were saying tho..
But all what happened at dinner must have been a nightmare..Mona couldn't have died..I made myself to believe so..
But..her lifeless body covered in blood..the hole through her heart and my hand covered in her blood.. These scenes flashed before my eyes..
And I knew..Mona was for real gone..
Whose fault?..
Mine..
Borys warned me..not to do anything funny..if only I had listen and not try to get him..he wouldn't have shot her..killed my dear Mona..
Ohh Mona
Mona
Mona
Mona..
His strong hands..shook me..trying to get me out of my nightmare..
"Selena.." He called.
Mona
Mona
"Snap out of it!" He yelled this time..and shook me vigorously..
I snapped my eyes open..almost immediately tears welled up in my eyes..
"Selena.." He called softly..
"Adonis?" I said unsure..the tears clouding my vision..I could see him faintly tho..
"Yes" he stated..and I sat up..
"Oh Adonis!" I cried..as I hugged him..
He hugged me back..tightly..
"Shh.. I'm here now..calm down" he said patting my hair slowly..trying to console me..
I kept on crying.."she..she is dead Adonis..I..I..I killed her" I said.. In his chest..
He drew back..
And made me face him..holding my cheeks..
"No..baby..no..it wasn't your fault..you didn't kill her selena" he said softly..trying to calm me down..
Subconsciously:I thought bab..what now?!!
I kept crying in his arms..
"If only..only..I.."
"Shh.. Selena..don't blame yourself..it wasn't your fault" he said still holding me..
"No.." I wiped my tears.." No..it is..I wasn't able to protect her..or anyone..if it wasn't for Gabriella..Bella would be gone too..or better still..I also would have died!" I yelled..
"Selena..calm down" he said
"Calm down?..calm down?..I can't Adonis..I fucking can't!.." The tears came back.."Mona must have trusted me..believed I could have protected her..but Instead..I stood there..while she was shot through the heart..the fucking heart!!" I shouted again.. Anger consuming me instead..
"Calm the fuck down Selena!!" He yelled back at me..
I didn't say anything..
"She never trusted you to protect her Selena..she was supposed to protect you" he continued..reducing his voice..
"What?..what do you mean?..she is a maid.. How on earth is she supposed to protect me?!" I asked impatiently..
He sighed..
"She knew..Selena..she knew working in my house.. Is also the same thing as signing a death contract.. And has a worker in this house..she was suppose to protect you by all means" He said softly..
And I became quiet..
Of course..working in his house is a death contract..
Like being his wife..
"If your workers aren't even safe..the word safe should be wiped out of my dictionary..shouldn't it?" I said softly..
"Selena..that's why the Mafia world is very..extremely dangerous..and as my wife..you have danger looming on your head.."
"So..I can't join the Mafia?" I asked..
"Hell! Selena..of course not..I can't let anything happen to you..I will always protect you" he said.. As he held my cheeks..
Fuck..I missed him
"You weren't there yesterday.. There was no one to protect us..protect me..you can't be always there Adonis" I said..stating the obvious
And he knew I was right..
"Besides you have to let me join..I must avenge Mona" I said..a determined look crossing my features..
"Avenge Mona?..don't be absurd Selena" he said..
"Absurd?..Mona wasn't just a maid..she was my friend Adonis..and whether you like it or not..I will avenge her" I said sternly..
"I will help you Selena..but you just can't join the Mafia"
"No..I have to do it myself Machavelli..I swore to God..I was going to kill Borys.." I said.. Dead serious..
"You want to kill?..no..No selena..I can't let you become a murderer.. I am one..but I can't taint you innocent soul" he said firmly..
I stood up from the bed..
Then chuckled dryly.. "Innocent?..the day you married me..in that chapel here in Italy..when i became your wife..Adonis Machavelli..I lost all innocence there is" I said..my face void of any emotions..
He was stunned..
He stood up also..and held my arms..
"What the fuck is wrong with you Selena?" He asked..
"Nothing actually..after all I'm a Mafia boss's wife.. Your wife" I said sternly..
"Se.." He started but was cut short by ivy..who came bursting into the room..
She stopped..she was dressed in all black..Adonis too..but I didn't really notice..cause that's what he wears on a normal day..
"I'm sorry..did I interrupt anything?" She asked..
Adonis released me.."No ivy" he said glancing at me..indicating.. That the conversation wasn't over..
Then he left the room..
"Selena.." She said jumping into my arms..I hugged her tightly..
"She is gone..Mona"she sobbed..
"Hmm.." I muttered..she drew back..
"I know..you will try to blame yourself..but it's not your fault Selena..okay?"
"Okay.." I said softly..
She sniffled.."you should freshen up..they are waiting downstairs..the funeral will soon commence..yeah..we don't waste time in the Mafia"
"Oh okay..Mona does deserve a good funeral" I said..the tears welling up again..
"Yeahhh.." She replied..turning to leave..
"I will be there soon"
----\\[]
I had a quick bath..and got dressed in a simple black gown..matching the occasion..and packed my hair in a messy bun..then used a comfortable black shawl..
Tears sting my eyes..as I looked around the closet..it made me remember the first day I got here..that she insisted that she got me dressed up..a tear fell from my eyes..
And the way she always called me "my lady" I chuckled to myself.. wiping the tears..and leaving the room..
I reached the first floor..everyone was truly waiting for me..dressed in all black..including some Mafia members and the workers in the house..
Almost everyone eyes were red with tears..everyone Loved Mona..
Well..Adonis's eyes weren't red..
Which was pretty normal..
Bella came to me..and huggedme tightly..I hugged her back..
"I'm sorry" I muttered.
"Hell No! Selena..it's not your fault" she said..
Before I could say anything..Adonis cut in..
"The pastor is already waiting at the cemetery..we have to go"he said..
And all of us left for the cemetery..
_>>^>_
The ceremony happened..prayers were said..tears was shed.
Mona might have just been a maid..but she meant something to every single one of us..
It was my turn to pour a handful of sand on her grave..
As I poured it..tears leaving my eyes..
I swore..I'm going to Avenge her death..if it's the last thing I do on earth..
I wasn't going to shed tears anymore..I was going to act..and act fast..
I went back to where I stood before..
My face void of any emotions..
Then I felt a hand on my hand..which was by my side..he pressed it reassuringly
"We are going to avenge her" he said..his voice..cold..
I just nod..
_>>_><_
We returned back home..then we retired back to the first floor living room..
Gabriella sat on the couch..opposite to me..Adonis sat beside her..and Bella sat beside me..Ivy and Diego sat on the righthand side..
"Erm..thanks..Thank you Gabriella for saving our lives" I said sternly..
"Oh erm..you don't need to thank me..it's part of my job" she said giving a small smile..
It's her job?!!
It's her Job to protect me?..when I can myself!!
My blood boiled with pent up anger..
I knew she was just doing her job or trying to console me..but I'm just so tired of everyone constantly thinking I'm worthless..
She can't even protect herself..they must have thought..
I stood up.. and stormed out of the living room..
I didn't run but I walked fast..to the room..
I closed the door shot..and groaned in frustration..
I can't protect myself..
Or the people close to me!
Mona Is dead..all because of me..
As if reading my mind.."Don't keep blaming yourself for her death Selena" his voice said firmly behind me..
I turned to him..
"I should stop?..really Adonis?..no..it's my fault..it's all my fault!" I yelled..
He closed the small distance between us..and held my arms..
"Stop Selena.."
"I can't.."I said softly as the tears threatened to fall again..
"I can't Adonis.."I inhaled sharply.."I'm so worthless..I can't protect anyone or myself..all I can do is wait and get kidnapped as bait..then you..you come running trying to safe my life!..I'm so fucking worthless!!" I yelled again..
"Fuck..it's not your job to protect anyone.." He said..
"It's not?..so I have to sit down and watch everyone die..without been able to do anything?!"
"Yes!!..I mean No..look Selena..you don't need to bother yourself with this " he said.
"But..I can't watch..I have to be able to do something..Machavelli..I'm your wife aren't i?" I asked..
"You know you are..."
"Right..I'm the wife of the most ruthless Mafia boss in the world..and you expect me..to not be able to fight for myself??..as you said..Danger is looming on my head..I need to be able to fight..at least handle a gun!" I said exparated..
He didn't say anything..
"Machavelli..you won't be always there to protect me..I need to help myself sometimes..since I will be here for God know how long" I said finally..
I hope.. I have been able to convince him..
"You are right" he stated finally..
"You do need some training"
"Finally" I breathed out..
"But you are not going to join the Mafia"he stated..
"Then how the hell do you expect me to avenge Mona?" I asked
"I will do that for you" he said as he turned to leave..
I quickly block his way..
"No..please.. I have to.."
"No"
"Okay..no..let me just join..and after I avenge her death..I will leave..i won't do anything related to the mafia.. please Machavelli.." I said
He didn't say anything..obviously considering the idea..
"Adonis?"
"Okay fine.. but I will look over everything" he said at last..
"Yeah..Great.." I said..giving him space to pass..
I turned to go and sit on the bed..I'm exhausted..
But before I could move..he held my hand..I turned back to him..giving him a questioning look..
He drew me into a hug..patting my head..I relaxed into his arms..and hugged him back..
Gosh..I missed him
"I'm proud of you" he said softly..my skipped a beat..
"Proud?"
"You handled the situation boldly" he said..rubbing my back..
I smiled.. hugging him tightly..
Okay..yeah..I'm falling for this man..
He drew back.."You should rest up" he said..
"Hmm" I muttered..as he gave me one last look..and he left the room..
I sighed deeply and sat on the bed..
Borys..
Borys..
You are a walking corpse!
I must avenge My dear Mona..
_>>_<>_
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