Rick was laying in bed with Amanda, watching her sleep. Amanda was having difficulties falling asleep so Hershel gave her medication to help. Amanda had fallen asleep at around 0545 and it was currently 1100. Rick stroked her hair, refusing to leave her side. He looked at her delicately and couldn't help but remember her first encounter with her.
February 2009
Shane, Rick and another officer named Tyler were talking in the break room at work. Shane had been dating Amanda for a few weeks but none of them believed him.
Tyler laughed, examining Amanda's facebook, "Army girl? Nurse? Owns a house? I don't know, Shane. I don't think she would date you. Does she know your history?" He laughed
Rick laughed loudly as he shifted in his seat, "She is pretty, though." He admitted
"She is dating me! Watch, watch!" Shane argued, snatching his phone back. He called Amanda and waited patiently for her to pick up.
"Hello?" Amanda questioned
"Hey baby, what's up?" Shane asked, nonchalantly
"I just got off a 12 hour shift, I'm exhausted." Amanda laughed softly, "Are you okay?" She asked
"No, can you come down to the station? There's a ticket with your name on it. I just need you to sign it." Shane lied
Amanda nodded, "Sure, I'll be there in 10." She said, hanging up the phone
"You're going to hell." Tyler laughed at Shane
After about 12 minutes, Amanda pulled up to the stationed. She walked inside, looking around curiously. She was wearing black scrubs with a white long sleeve underneath and white sneakers. Her hair was in a ponytail with the ends curled nicely. She had false eyelashes on and a little bit of chapstick. She smiled softly at the man working the front desk, "Hi, is Shane Walsh here?" She questioned, smiling as the man called Shane over
Shane jogged over, "Hey, baby." He grinned, leaning in and kissing her lovingly.
Amanda placed her hands on his chest, kissing back, "Hi, you said i had a ticket?" She questioned
"No, Shane just wanted to show you off like a piece of meat." Tyler spoke, coming out of the break room with Rick.
Amanda looked at Shane, rolling her eyes, "Shane." She laughed softly, shaking her head. She looked over as Rick walked out of the room and she smiled, checking him out briefly before turning back over to Shane, her cheeks rosy, "Can i go home?" She laughed softly
"I invited Rick and Lori to the superbowl party we're having, I hope that's okay." Shane said as he rubbed Amanda's hips
Amanda smiled, "not a problem." Amanda smiled, looking over at Rick and Tyler, "I'm sorry, I don't mean to be rude. Hi, I'm Amanda." she smiled, holding her hand out. She shook Tyler's hand politely before turning to Rick. She shook his hand, smiling as he gave her a soft squeeze
"How did y'all meet?" Rick asked as he let his hand linger in hers
"Asked her out." Shane said quickly, "She was wooed by my charm." He said
Amanda laughed, "He pestered me for weeks before i agreed to ONE pity date." Amanda said, "But unfortunately i was also wooed by the charm." She sighed heavily
"So have about half the women's in Kings County." Tyler laughed
Shane looked at him, rage burning in his eyes
"His past doesn't mean much to me." Amanda said, "I'm focused on the present and the future."
"Good luck with that. Not much of a future for this fella." Tyler laughed
Amanda forced a smile before looking at Rick, "So, is Lori your wife?" She asked politely
"Yeah." Rick smiled
Amanda smiled, nodding kindly, "Well, it's been nice but i'd love to get home and sleep." She admitted
"Yeah, yeah, lemme walk you out." Shane said, placing his hand on her bum
"It was nice meeting you guys." Amanda said kindly as she walked towards the door.
Rick couldn't help but watch from the window, examining the interaction outside.
Shane walked Amanda to her car, smiling as he stopped to kiss her deeply. He tangled his hands in her hair, deepening the kiss as he let his hands trail down her body.
Amanda pushed his hands away, keeping their lips connected
"C'mon, it's been three months." Shane whispered softly, "I think i've earned it." he mumbled as he kissed at her neck
Amanda placed her hands on his chest, pushing him away again, "Shane, c'mon." Amanda said softly as she pushed away, but gasped as Shane pulled her back in forcefully
"C'mon, just once." Shane begged her
Rick watched from the window, uncomfortable with the situation. He saw Shane manhandling her but he didn't want to interrupt, in fear of reprisal.
"No!" Amanda said, finally pushing him away, "Stop!" She said angrily
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Shane said, putting his hands up in surrender. He leaned in to give Amanda a goodbye kiss but frowned when she dodged his lips. He scoffed, shaking his head, "Amanda, you're making me look bad." Shane said, "C'mon, give me a kiss goodbye. I'm a cop, I could die on the line of duty."
Amanda inhaled deeply, leaning in and giving him a kiss. She climbed into the drivers side of her car and drove off.
Rick was brought back to reality when Amanda began stirring in bed. He gently played with her hair, watching her as she began to wake up, "Good morning." Rick said softly
Amanda opened her eyes, looking up at Rick. Her eyes were red and puffy from having cried so much the night before, "Hi." She said softly, "What time is it?" She asked softly
"Almost noon." Rick said softly, stroking her hair, "Do you remember when Shane called you down to the station and we first met?"
Amanda shifted in bed, nodding slowly
"Did Shane always treat you like that?" Rick asked
"Like what?" Amanda asked softly
"Like an animal." Rick admitted, "I saw from the shop he was trying to touch you in the parking lot."
"Ah, i see." Amanda said, nodding slowly, "sometimes." She admitted, "He struggles with boundaries. He thinks he's Gods gift to women."
Rick laughed, nodding, "he truly does believe that." he said softly, stroking her cheek.
Amanda leaned into his touch, "I thought you were cute." She admitted, "you shook my hand and your palm was clammy."
Rick laughed again, "i was shaking hands with a pretty girl, can you blame me?" Rick leaned in to kiss her but frowned as she dodged him
"I haven't brushed my teeth yet." Amanda replied
Rick rolled his eyes, "Amanda i don't care." He laughed
"I do. Give me like 5 minutes." Amanda begged, crawling out of bed and to the bathroom. She brushed her teeth before running back to Rick, giving him a deep kiss.
Rick smiled, running his hands up her body as he kissed her lovingly, "I think they wanna do the ceremony for Dale at 2." He said softly
Amanda nodded, "okay." she said softly, "i love you." amanda said softly as she pressed her forehead against his
"I love you." Rick said as he looked up when Carl walked in, crying
"Hey, what's going on?" Amanda asked worriedly
"I killed Dale." Carl said, letting a cry out, "I'm sorry, Amanda."
"You didn't kill Dale, a walker did." Amanda explained
"Remember i told you i went into the woods? I ran into a walker." Carl began
"The same one that got Dale?" Rick asked
Carl nodded, looking down at his feet
"That's still not your fault, honey." Amanda said, her heart heavy, "You didn't make the walker attack Dale, you didn't make Dale go out to the field at night. You did not control the actions of that scenario." Amanda soothed
Carl hugged Amanda, crying into her chest, "If i killed that walker, Dale would be alive."
Amanda swayed him gently, "Dale was so old, he was probably gonna die within a few days anyway." Amanda joked, trying to lighten the mood
Carl looked up at Amanda, giving a small smile as he sniffled, "You're not angry at me?" He asked softly
"No, honey." Amanda promised, wiping his tears, "Please don't go out into the woods alone." She said softly as she stroked his hair back
Carl nodded, resting his head back on her chest as he wrapped his arms around her waist, giving her a hug.
Amanda rested her chin on the top of his head, "Have you eaten today?" She questioned, frowning when he shook his head, "Go get some lunch, yeah?" She smiled, ruffling his hair as he scurried off
"He likes you." Rick noted, "I can't be his dad and his friend, he needs you." Rick said with a soft smile
Amanda looked up at him, "I never wanted kids." She admitted, "I couldn't handle having my heart be outside of my body. Especially nowadays." Amanda said, "But I love Carl. He makes me wish i did have a kid."
Rick smiled, "maybe one day." He said
Amanda smiled as she stood up, sliding on a pair of black jeans. She slid on a black blouse and began brushing her hair, tucking a loose strand behind her ear. She looked up as Rick came over and helped her put on her necklace, kissing her forehead.
At 2:00pm, they all gathered around Dales plot for the funeral.
Amanda was standing besides Rick, looking down at the grave.
"Amanda, would you like to speak?" Hershel asked
"I don't know what to say." Amanda admitted, "Dale was a good person but god was he annoying sometimes. He was like... the little angel on your shoulder telling you to put down the bag of cookies and eat an apple. he was so genuine.." Amanda said, laughing softly as she wiped her eyes, "i can't, i'm sorry." amanda said, choking on her own words
"Amanda's right." Rick said, taking over on her behalf, "Dale could... could get under your skin. He sure got under mine, because he wasn't afraid to say exactly what he thought and how he felt. That kind of honesty is rare and brave. Whenever I'd make a decision, I'd look at Dale. He'd be looking back at me with that look he had. We've all seen it one time or another. I couldn't always read him, but he could read us. He saw people for who they were. He knew things about us... the truth... Who we really are. In the end, he was talking about losing our humanity. He said this group was broken. The best way to honor him is to unbreak it. Set aside our differences and pull together, stop feeling sorry for ourselves and take control of our lives... our safety... our future. We're not broken. We're gonna prove him wrong. From now on... we're gonna do it his way. That is how we honor Dale." Rick said softly
Shortly after the ceremony ended, everyone dispersed. Amanda stayed behind, placing flowers on all the graves. She looked up as Shane came out of the woods, his nose broken, stumbling along, "He escaped!" Shane shouted, spitting up blood, "Randall's out!" He shouted
Amanda jogged over to him, "Daryl! Rick!" She yelled, "Oh my god, Randall did this?" Amanda asked worriedly, "He's like 120lbs soaking wet, how did he get you? " Amanda said, suspiciously. She looked behind her as Rick and Daryl came running over with Glenn on their trail
"We gotta scout the woods." Shane said, ignoring Amanda, "He's got my gun, he's armed." He said, "Rick, you come with me. Glenn, Daryl, you guys pair up."
Amanda looked at Rick worriedly, exhaling deeply as she shook her head at Rick, "No." she said
"Amanda, I have to." Rick said, taking the gun from her holster and placing it in his own. He grabbed her shoulders, pulling her in for a kiss, not caring who was watching
Amanda kissed back, closing her eyes before she felt him pull away, "Okay." She said softly, "I'm gonna gather everyone in the house, T-Dog and i will hold it down." Amanda said softly, watching as shane back-briefed Daryl and Glenn. Amanda looked up, reaching into her boot and taking out a knife. She slid it into the opening in ricks jeans, pulling his shirt over it. She nodded at him before jogging off to find T-Dog
Shane and Rick took off into the woods, "So, you and amanda now, huh?" Shane asked Rick, "Lori and Amanda. You get them both?" He questioned
"I assumed you and lori were an item." Rick said as he walked besides Shane
"Nope, she wants nothing to do with me. Says the baby is yours and she wants me to keep my distance." Shane said
"I think scientifically we all know who that baby really belongs to." Rick said, "But i think for Carls sake, she just says me."
Shane laughed, "I knew you were soft for Amanda. I knew you liked her, from the moment you met her at the station, all the double dates we did, the police banquet..." he laughed, "she'll never love you the way she loved me. you're weak. you can't protect this group. you've got a rogue prisoner running around, amanda's emotional over dale and ... and your kid is stealing guns and wanting us to shoot people down. everything in your life is falling apart, rick." shane said, "what is going good for you, huh?"
Rick inhaled deeply, "I think my relationship with Amanda is good. Carl is a kid, he doesn't know much yet." He said as stopped walking, his back to Shane.
Shane was breathing heavily as he took his gun out of his holster
"So this is where you plan to do it?" Rick asked
"Seems as good as a place as any." Shane said
"At least have the balls to call this what it is." Rick said, "murder. you really believe that if you walk back over to the farm, no me, no randall, they'll believe whatever bull shit story you spew? you think amanda won't kill you in your sleep? you think she'll let you walk around that camp? please, she'll put a bullet between you eyes before you even realize what's going on." Rick said
"shut up." shane said angrily, "i saw that prisoner shoot you down, i ran after him, i snapped his neck. it won't be easy, but lori and carl will get over you. they've done it before. amanda? amanda can have anyone she wants." shane said, "you're just a place holder. she's young, attractive, she doesn't want an older man with two kids and a wife."
"why now?" rick asked, "i thought we were over all this." rick said
"what did you think man? we tried to kill each other." shame laughed, "we would ride off into the sunset?"
"are you gonna ride off into the sunset? screw lori? screw my girlfriend? have my son call you daddy?" he asked, "is that what you want?" he asked, "that life won't be worth a damn, i know you."
"what do you know about me?" shane laughed, "let's talk about what i can do. let's talk about what you can do. raise your gun."
"no, i will not." rick said
"you're not gonna fight for them? really?" shane laughed, "i'm a better man than you rick, a better provider.. a better father!" he shouted, "when this all went down, i protected your family while you were off kissing my ex girlfriend, letting her change your diapers like a baby." shane mocked, "i'm better for this group than you. i can fight for them, you can't. you got a broken girlfriend, a broken wife, a weak boy... you don't know how to fix it. raise your gun." shane demanded
"you're gonna have to kill an unarmed man." Rick said, reaching for his gun slowly, "nice and easy.." he said softly, "there is still a way back from this... nothing has happened... we can lay down our guns... and we can walk back to the farm... together..." rick said, "back to lori, back to amanda... back to carl..." rick said, "put this all behind us." he said, holding his gun in his hand. He reached into his jeans slowly, taking out the knife Amanda had given him and stabbed Shane. He held his body as he gently lowered him to the ground. Rick kneeled over his dying body, "Damn you, Shane! Damn you, for making me do this! This was you, not me! This was you, not me! Not me!" Rick yelled angrily
Meanwhile, on the farm, Amanda was inside the house with Daryl and Glenn. Amanda chewed the inside of her cheek as they told her about the trails and their findings, "it's a trap." amanda said looking at them, "a trap, shane's gonna try and kill rick." amanda said worriedly as she grabbed her shot gun, running out the front house. She froze when she saw a herd of walkers approach the home, "No!" Amanda screamed, "everyone, start packing your stuff. grab whatever you can, pack them inside the cars." amanda said
"I can't find Carl!" Lori cried, "I'm not leaving without Carl!" She said
"Carol! Help Lori find Carl, he might be hiding. Everyone else, pack up or go outside and start shooting." Amanda said. She grabbed a pistol and some magazines, along with a rifle. She climbed on top of Dales RV, getting on her stomach as she began shooting walkers. She froze, looking up seeing the barn was on fire, "what the fuck is going on?" Amanda screamed in frustration. Amanda saw Jimmy run outside, "Hey! Drive the RV towards the barn! Please!" Amanda yelled
Jimmy climbed in the RV and drove off towards the barn.
Amanda stood on top, shooting walkers as they approached the barn. She laughed in relief as she saw Carl and Rick wave them down. Amanda stood beneath the window of the barn, "Carl, jump." Amanda said
"I'm scared, what if i miss?" Carl panicked
"I'll catch you, I'm here." Amanda promised. She caught Carl as he jumped, "Good, good." She said, grabbing Rick to stabilize him as he jumped besides her.
Rick heard screaming and he looked down, seeing blood splatter on the inside of the RV.
"Listen! Rick, Carl, you guys gotta go. Take the ladder down and run." Amanda said, "I'm gonna provide cover fire. You guys run, run until you get to the farm house." Amanda said
"Amanda, no." Rick said
"Rick, i'm not arguing. Carl needs you. Go." Amanda said
Rick nodded, giving her a kiss before he climbed down the ladder, helping Carl.
Amanda used her rifle to shoot walkers that came too close to Carl or Rick. Amanda sighed in relief as she watched them reach the farmhouse.
Lori grabbed Ricks arm, "We gotta go, let's go!" She begged, leading him to the car.
Rick grabbed Hershel, pulling him along with him. Rick got in the drivers seat, driving off quickly, a sinking feeling in his stomach as he glanced back and saw Amanda wasnt on top of the RV anymore. Rick drove in silence, his hands gripping the wheel as he drove towards the highway. He climbed out of the car, his hands shaking.
Glenn pulled up to the highway, parking the car. Beth, Maggie, T-Dog and Carol climbed out.
Hershel sighed in relief as he went over, hugging Beth and Maggie
"Amanda? Is amanda with you?" Rick questioned worriedly
Glenn shook his head, "her, daryl and andrea didn't make it out." He said softly, "I saw her jump down from the RV and i never saw her come back up." he said quietly, "i heard her screaming.."
Rick banged his hand on the hood of the car, "no! no." he said angrily, "no." he said in disbelief, "no." he said. Rick sat down on the street, burying his face in his hands as he cried angrily, feeling his body get weak. Shane was right, he couldn't protect anyone. He couldn't keep Amanda alive, or Lori, or Carl - let alone a helpless baby. Rick laid down on the highway, staring at the sky, almost paralyzed
"Rick, we gotta keep going. We're vulnerable here." Hershel said softly
Rick perked up hearing a motorcycle. He stood up, running to meet Daryl. He let out a cry of relief when he saw Amanda on the backside. She looked appalling. She was covered in blood, some of her own, some from the walker. Her arm hung loosely in the sleeve of her shirt, showing that her shoulder was dislocated. Rick helped Amanda off the bike, laughing as he kissed her, not caring how dirty she was.
Amanda kissed him back weakly, closing her eyes before she pulled away
"Come here, let me take a look at that." Carol said, bringing amanda over. She helped Amanda take off her shirt, sighing, "it's definitely dislocated." she said softly, "i have to fix it." she said, "bite down on this." she said, handing Amanda her belt.
Amanda closed her eyes tightly, holding Ricks hand as she bit down on the belt. She let out a loud muffled cry as her shoulder popped from Carols push. Amanda let heavy tears stream down her face as Hershel made a sling out of a flannel. She whimpered softly as they folded her arm up, placing it in the sling.
"thank you, brother." rick said, hugging daryl tightly, "thank you." he said softly
"Where's Shane?" Lori asked
"Shane didn't make it." Rick said softly, "He's dead." He said, "We're vulnerable on the highway, let's move." He said, walking towards his car. He opened the passengers door for Amanda, helping her get settled as Carl, Hershel and Lori got in the backseat. Rick drove off down the road.
After a few miles, T-Dog honked the horn on his car, causing them all to pull over.
"You outta gas?" Rick asked T-Dog as he opened Amanda's door for her, helping her down
"Running on fumes." T-Dog admitted
"Glenn and I can make a run for supplies." Maggie offered
"We have to stick together." Rick said, "We don't know what's out there, what if your car breaks down? We can't help you."
"We can't stay here, we need to find shelter." Maggie argued
Amanda looked around, nudging Rick as she pointed over to a small area with some brick walls, "some shelter." she offered
"What're we doing here?" Carol asked, "Rick can't keep us safe. He can't lead us. We're out in the open." Carol said
"Please, feel free to leave." Amanda spoke up, "you blame Rick and I every day for what happened to Sophia. I'm sorry, but that's not our fault. She knew to stay under the car, she knew to stay hidden. we tried. you didn't even attempt to go after her." amanda said. Amanda turned around and saw Rick talking to Lori.
Lori's face looked horrified as she stared at Rick in disbelief, hearing how Rick killed Shane.
"We can build a new life, we just have to find it." Amanda said to the group, "we can't do that if we're all scattered."
Rick walked over, rubbing Amanda's good shoulder, "I'm so tired of all this... this nonsense! this negativity! we've survived. we're alive! we found each other, after all this... this tragedy. for gods sake, i killed my best friend for you guys!" he shouted
"i'm sorry for not wanting to get torn apart be walkers! we need shelter!" Carol argued
"no matter what, we all die, we all turn, we're all infected." Rick blurted out
"what?" amanda asked
"jenner, at the CDC. he told me we were all infected. no matter how we die, we turn." rick said
"and you didn't tell us?" lori asked
"i didn't know if it was true or not. i was trying to protect everyone." rick said, looking at Amanda for support
Amanda's jaw fell and she was staring at Rick. She took a moment to compose herself, "alright, enough, rick didn't know if it was true. now he does and now everyone else does too. if you have any issues with ricks way of leading, please, by all means - step up , step out or shut up." amanda said
"this isn't a democracy anymore. if you're here, you're here." rick said firmly