will's Pov
"I'm going crazy. That woman is driving me insane" I say as I'm sitting in the living room with a beer talking to Nate. Juliet is driving me insane by not talking to me because I don't know if we are on the same page or not. She pushes me away like I'm some sort of plague she needs to get rid of, while I try to get close to her. It's not like I'm going to bite her or hit her if she decides to talk to me. I just want to know what she is feeling and if she feels the same way I do. My feelings for her are intense and I don't want to fool myself into thinking that it's a two-way thing if it's not that. I know she has feelings for me, but I don't know if they are as strong as mine.
"Didn't Selena tell you to give her time? I don't know what happened in the past but sounds like it was serious" he argues taking a sip of his beer. "Yeah, I know. But I don't know how much time I'm supposed to give her. And if I'm supposed to push the situation. I've never been in a situation like this with a girl before, and it's driving me up the wall" I groan rubbing my temple.
Usually, girls throw themself at me, but this woman is not like anyone I've ever met. She is stubborn and hard to get to know, but I also really like her. I'm willing to work for her affection if that's what it takes to get her to accept me, but I don't want to throw myself at her if it's not something she wants at all. If I knew that her feelings were growing too, we could work together to figure it out, but she wouldn't tell me anything. It's been a week since our date, and she refuses to talk to me. The only time we have talked is the small sentences on Monday at the ice rink, that's it. Why can't she just tell me how she is feeling? I'm not the best at talking about feelings either, but at least I'm not running from her.
"You so whipped for her will. And I love to see it" he says, and I chuckle. "I'm not whipped. I don't get whipped for anyone. Girls get whipped for me" I argue but he just rolls his eyes.
"will. I know you, and I see how you're acting about her. You're whipped like a puppy seeking her affection and approval. It's not a bad thing, settling with one woman is not a bad thing" he says, and I know that he is right. I just don't like admitting that I'm whipped for anyone, it's not my style.
This woman is changing me, and it makes me nervous knowing the effect she has on me. I'm willing to give a real relationship a shot if she would just talk to me and I would know if she felt the same way. If that's not something she wants I will respect that, but I need to know. The kiss meant something to me, and I think it did to her too.
"You're pretty whipped too though Nate. Selena seems to be someone you talk to a lot these days" I say raising an eyebrow and he chuckles and clears his throat "Yeah, somehow I knew you would bring that up. We are talking and I like her. She is funny and so smart. I'm thinking of developing our late-night calls and texting into asking her on a date. I'm just nervous" he says.
I think he genuinely likes her, and I hope the feeling is mutual. Nate deserves to find someone to fall for, and hopefully, Selena isn't a person that would break his heart. Selena seems like someone Nate would be a good fit with.
Sure she is more extroverted than him, but that's not a bad thing. A lot of the time opposites attract. Just look at Juliet and me. I'm way more extroverted than her, but still, we seem to get along well... that is excluding her refusing to talk to me for the past week. But when we talk or hang out, we get along like we have known one another forever.
"Ask her out. The worst thing that could happen is for her to turn you down. But at least then you would know if she sees you as a friend or something more" I say, and he agrees.
Juliet's Pov
I'm at lunch with Selena to avoid going home just yet. Lilly is at a birthday party for a while longer and I don't want to be at home alone with Will longer than necessary. I'm childish for running away from him, I know that, but I just don't know what else to do about the situation. My core instinct is to run like hell away from anything that feels even remotely good. Because good things can turn bad quickly, I've seen that film before, and I didn't like the ending.
I wish I knew what his intentions were so I could know what to do. Why can't I flip to the end of the book and see how it turns out before I even open the book, just to make sure I don't get hurt again? Not knowing how it's going to turn out scares the shit out of me because I've been burned before. Who knows what his true intentions are? And I won't know that at the beginning of the book, it's something that is revealed with time. Travis was a perfect gentleman before it all went up in smoke, same with Domenic. They fooled me into falling for them and then I was trapped. Love has brought me nothing but pain, so why would will be any difference?
"You aren't even giving him a chance Juliet" Selena argues, and I sigh, she is right, but she also knows how fucking scared I am of what could become of it if I let myself lean into his embrace. He could hurt me badly, just like the boys I've known before. This is all driving me insane with a range of different thoughts going in a million directions.
"I know Selena. But you know me. I'm terrified" I mumble. She reaches across the table and takes my hand in hers. "Tay. I know you and I know you're scared. But I have a good feeling about Will. Not every guy out there is like Travis and Domenic. There are good guys out there and you don't know if Will is your destiny or not before you give him a chance" she says, and I huff at the mention of destiny.
I don't believe in that until I see it with my own eyes. It's crap because I thought Domenic was my destiny, then I thought Travis was my destiny. Turns out that I'm crap at reading what is right in front of me. Now in hindsight, I can see all the red flags that should have been obvious early on, but no I was blinded by the idea of love. As a child I loved reading books about epic love stories where two people were destined for one another found their one true love and lived happily ever after. Now I know that's just something you read about in books, not something that happens in real life. Love isn't like a storybook where good people get a happy ending. Love is the idea of something epic, it's not realistic.
"You have closed your heart sweetie, but maybe will can open it and dust off the hurt leaving you brand new. Letting people in isn't a bad thing" she adds before I can say anything else.
"Will is... I don't know what Will is... he confuses me and gets on my nerves sometimes, but he is also a good person. He plays with Lilly; he shows me that he cares. But what if it's just an act and he is a wolf in sheep's clothing? I can't be hurt again Selena" I say, and my voice keeps cracking, but I refuse to break down in public. I'm not going to lie and say that I don't have tender feelings for Will, because I do, I'm just scared to act on them.
"I wasn't planning on telling you this but Will came to me a few days ago asking about how to talk to you and that he has strong feelings for you. He seems like a patient man, but everyone has their limits. Try talking to him Juliet, you owe it to yourself to try. I'm not going to force you or tell you that you need to do it, but I think you owe it to yourself. You've gotten your heart broken in the past, but it has also made you stronger. I told him to be patient with you."
Did will come to my best friend to ask her? It gives me involuntary butterflies and I feel my cheeks heat up.
｡ﾟ•┈--୨♡୧--┈• ｡ﾟ
I was hoping that Lilly would be back home when I got there, but no such luck, she is still at the party so I'm alone with Will. "Juliet," he says and comes towards me when I enter the apartment. He has a look of determination and I know that I won't get away with running away from him once more. My heart rate speeds up when he comes closer, but I don't move from my spot.
Gently he holds my upper arm making me flinch, but I don't pull away as he gently caresses my arm down to my hand taking it lightly and leading me to the living room. "We need to talk Juliet," he says, and I panic but I know he is right, we need to talk.
We sit down on the couch, and I bring my legs close to my chest and wrap my arms around them. This could change the dynamic between us if he decided that he didn't have feelings for me after all. But if he does have feelings for me, I need to decide if I will admit that I have feelings for him too.
"Look, Juliet. I'm going to get right to the point. You keep running away from me and I don't know what to do. The date went so well, and I felt something that evening when I kissed you. But we never got to talk about it because you keep running from me. I have feelings for you Juliet, I'm going to be honest with you and tell you that. But I need to know if you have feelings for me too or if I'm just kidding myself. Because I know that it's hard for you, I know that you've been hurt in the past, but I need to know if you feel something for me too" he goes on a rant. He is saying all the right things, he really is, but I'm terrified. If I let him in, I risk getting hurt again, and I don't think I could take another heartbreak.
"I have feelings for you too. You're making me feel all sorts of things and I don't know what to do William" I say as a few stray tears force their way out of my eyes. It should be a happy thing, for most people it probably is, but when you've been through what I have it gets more complicated.
When I finally dare to look at him, he has a big smile on his face which makes me nervous again "We can work on that Juliet. Don't push me away because you're scared. I'm not going to hurt you; I promise you that you can trust me. Not everyone is like the people that have hurt you in the past and made you build tall walls around you, I'm not like them" he says and gently moves closer to me before wrapping his arms around me.
The tears keep slowly streaming down my face because I'm hesitant to truly open up to anyone, what if he hurts me? He could make me fall in love with him and then break my heart just like the boys I've loved before. both he and Selena say that he isn't like Travis and Domenic, but I can't handle that type of hurt again. Months ago, I promised myself that I would never fall in love again because the pain that I'm risking wasn't worth the moments of happiness that I could get. Getting back on my feet after I ended things with Travis was hard, but I found myself again and I don't want to lose that.
"Love look at me please," he says, and I shiver when he calls me that, it's the first time he has addressed me as anything but my name in private, but I sort of like it. It sounds nice rolling off his tongue like it was the most natural thing to call me.
Hesitantly I meet his soft gaze and he caresses my face softly. When he first touches my face, I flinch but I'm trying to trust him, so I let him touch me. His fingers are soft running along my skin like I'm something delicate.
After a few minutes of silence where he keeps caressing my face and looking into my eyes, he leans in and presses his lips against mine again. It feels so good, so right. Having affection feel good is new because it usually ends up in pain. He cradles my face running his fingers through my hair like it's the most natural thing ever. I kiss him back and eventually, I scratch the back of his neck letting him know I like it.
His tongue delicately run along my bottom lip asking for entrance and I hesitate but let him slip his tongue into my mouth. His tongue explores my mouth and I can't stop a moan from escaping my mouth and getting lost in his. The kiss is intense and makes my body heat up all over. I'm running out of air, but I would rather suffocate than pull away.
will is the one to pull away first and we are both out of breath. He gives me a quick and soft peck before leaning back and letting me snuggle into his side and I'm not going to object to that. Even though his lips aren't on mine anymore they feel swollen from the kissing and are still tingly from the pressure of his lips. a kiss has never made me feel like that before, made me feel safe and like I could trust it. But It's like a switch going back and forth between wanting to be in his arms and then being terrified that he is going to flip the switch and hurt me.
We sit here in comfortable silence for a while until he decides to break it. "This is delicate, and I want to take it at your pace. But I just want to ask you why you flinch. Did I hurt you or is it about something that happened in the past?" He asks hesitantly.
I debate for a moment what to tell him because I want to trust someone with the truth, but it's hard to get the worst to escape my mouth. "I don't have good luck in the relationship department. Affection always comes with pain, so I guess my body is just waiting for it to hurt" I say quietly embarrassed that I'm even telling him this, but he gently tilts my head, so I am forced to look at him.
"Juliet love, I'm not going to hurt you. If I ever do something that you're not comfortable with just tell me and I will stop. When you're ready to tell me about whatever happened before I will be there to listen to you. But affection doesn't have to hurt, in fact, it's not supposed to hurt. It's supposed to feel good because you let yourself feel something tender about someone else. But we can work on it together, I can show you how good it could make you feel. I'm not going to hurt you or touch you when you don't want me to" he says and gently kisses my forehead making my eyes flutter shut for a moment.
His words are filled with care and confidence like he is certain that he isn't going to hurt me. I'm going to try to trust him, but it's not going to be easy. Hopefully, he will be patient with me because I want to be close to him too.
I've never had luck in this department, it always ends up crashing and in flames eventually. But the hopeless romantic in me is still hoping for that happily ever after that everyone keeps talking about that I don't even believe exists. I'm a hopeless romantic but I'm also a realist that has been burned too many times. Only time will tell what will happen to me and will.