Bitter Taste
🍁☂️
The bright scenery began to slowly shift to a dim and misty colour, much like how Kazuha could remember when passing by Dragonspine. The track ahead seemed the most dangerous so far as he had never been so far from his land of birth, nor learned much beforehand of the nation which grew in secrecy under the Tsaritsa.
When he noticed the clouds began to shield over the sun, Scara could feel the cold air welcome them. The darkness of Snezhnaya reminded him of his 'home' in Tenshukaku with its gloomy weather and foggy days, but this was different. Flurries of snow had begun to take form the farther they walked down the winding paths, catching in his veil.
"Last night," Kazuha began, glancing at him. "I had a dream."
Dread began to fill Scara's chest. Is he referring to last night? How much does he remember?
"In that dream, I saw you for who you are, and the vague expression in your eyes." Kazuha stopped talking for a moment, recalling how real the dream felt. "And you were upset. The dream was all broken up, and it might all be actually from last night, but..."
Kazuha fiddled with the pummel of his sheathed sword, searching for the words. "I remember feeling overcome by the loveliness of your stature like I found the bird that carried a familiar and captivating melody."
The wanderer was getting emotional again but in a way of melancholy and longing. "Tell me," he paused and turned to Scara, his expression stiff but not suffocating. "Did I see your face?"
How could he not have prepared himself for this moment? Kazuha would eventually see his face, and what other secrets he had. Scara hid under plenty of false identities to keep himself safe, so why did it matter if he was truthful or not to Niwa's descendant?
"Yes," Scara choked and drew in a sharp breath. "It wasn't a dream." He stared ahead, just anywhere so that he wouldn't have to look at Kazuha. It was only a blessing that no one knew what Inazuma's prince looked like, only by simple descriptions and the most signature feature of 'having lavender-coloured eyes.'
Kazuha was quiet for a period too, staring out to the mountains beyond before a big smile formed on his face. He turned to Scara with a faint redness in his cheeks. "Everything from when I looked into your eyes, even in my drunken state, to your smile is wonderful." It might have been the alcohol in his system that brought him the courage to be so honest, but he still felt embarrassed.
This was not the response Scara had been making up fake scenarios for. Glancing away from Kazuha, his face grew red, "You..You're the only person that has ever seen my face so closely, so you better feel lucky."
Kazuha also turned away, covering his smile before he turned back around with a meek smile. "Would I ever see you without the veil again?" he almost whispered, hope in his eyes.
"Most likely, though we'll have to see." Even though it was beginning to grow cold around them, Scara's face was warm. Ever since he had begun to become..what do you call this? Friends? He felt a whole new array of emotions, as he is a puppet, shouldn't be able to feel.
"Now my turn, what are your guesses about me? I haven't said much about myself, so I'm curious what your assumptions are."
Kazuha paused, a bit taken aback by the question. He had never thought too deeply of Scara's true identity to prevent his curiosity from getting the best of him, but, in all honesty, he already knew Scara was of noble background.
"Well," he began walking down the road again, looking up to the sky as he put his thoughts into words. "I knew when I first saw you in Liyue Harbour by your indigo silk that you were of some Inazuman noble blood. At first, I felt you were travelling for fun without permission, but I see now that it's more than that."
Kazuha glanced over to Scara, his expression relaxed, "You've run away, am I correct?"
There was some hope left that Kazuha wouldn't theorize so well, but he hit him spot on. Was Kazuha always so vigilant or was he just that easy to read? Fiddling with his necklace, Scara told the truth, "Yes, I did run away, but I have my reasons. I might tell you one day." He was risking so much just by travelling with Kazuha, so why did he take the chance? He could have made it to Snezhnaya all by himself, but just why didn't he push Kazuha off sooner? Now it was inevitable what was to come.Just thinking about it made Scara wince.
"You needn't worry about telling me. I understand some things are harder to say, so there's no rush."
It was silent for a moment, nothing but the crunch of gravel, dried leaves, and the howling wind filling in the space. "That reminds me,' Scara broke the silence. "You need to drink some water, Kazuha. It's not good to drink that much wine in one night," he quickly changed the topic and began searching for any lakes nearby.
Kazuha's laid-back expression turned to a burst of laughter. He nodded in agreement, "I suppose I do. I'm sure you wouldn't want to continue listening to my blabbering anymore."
"Of course, all you seemed to speak of were old poetic phrases last night. I couldn't understand a word you said as you showered me with compliments. Do you know how difficult it was to get you back to your room without that bottle of wine glued to your hand?" Scara began letting his true personality show unintentionally. Even if Kazuha was relatively sobered up now, he still could find trust in showing a bit more of his true self to the samurai.
Hearing Scara be so carefree around him made Kazuha emotionally moved. The Inazuman had been very suspicious of him when they had first met in Liyue, but it only took around a week for them to get closer. He could already feel their friendship root deep in his soul. One day, he would have to write a poem about their travels together just to share with the world what great memories Scara brought him.
"How about we fetch lunch there and take some time to rest?" he motioned toward a forest of thick pine and spruce. The bags weren't as heavy as the first few days for him, but he would admit he was a little sore.
"Anything you'd like to request for lunch? Fish would be the easiest to catch and make something with, but I'd like to give you the option this time. I'll see if I'll be able to suit the tastes of a noble," he said with a teasing smile as he led the way into the forest, in direction of a creek he could hear.
"Well..." He did have quite a picky palette, but he wasn't left with much of a choice considering they were in the forest. Nonetheless, there were plenty of ingredients they could search for to add to a simple dish. "We can gather some herbs, preferably some berries or mushrooms to add to the grilled fish you make. In these parts, they shouldn't be too difficult to spot."
"We might get lucky and find some chickweeds, sweet flowers, or mints. Some are pretty easy to catch by scent or other common plants, but I'm not as familiar with travelling as you, so I bet you know much more than I do from simple books." He didn't want to bother Kazuha with such trouble, but if the man himself insists, who is he to deny?
It seemed that he had been planning to run away for quite some time given how much he knew about herbs used to cook in the wild. This made Kazuha upset on Scara's behalf, even if he didn't know the reason why Scara escaped from Inazuma.
"I wouldn't want to pick anything you won't like, so it would be best if you sought out the fruits and fungi. I have an idea for what dish I can make for his majesty," Kazuha joked again, smiling like a doofus and carrying on through the woods.
Scara would have laughed at the joke, but it felt too close to home that it began to make him worry if Kazuha knew more than he actually let on. "Oh, don't worry about it," he waved his hands, fiddling with his necklace unintentionally. "I quite enjoyed the meals you prepared for us in the past, so there's really no need to stress making it fancier."
The terrain had begun to get steeper and more difficult to climb around. Scara would have lost his sandals a couple times already if he didn't specially wrap ribbons onto them. "The biggest problem with our lunch plans though-" he cut himself off as he almost tripped, but caught himself. These stupid branches and crawling vines. "-would be finding a river to catch some fish."
"Ah, well." Kazuha turned and pulled a low tree branch down for Scara to pass. "I just so happened to find one." As Kazuha's ears were keen, they arrived at a large river, though the current was slow enough to walk across and steep enough to see the fish. He set down the bags, took off his haori, sandals, socks, and hat, before placing his sword to lean against a tree.
"I got the main ingredient handled," Kazuha said with a thumbs up as he began to make his way through the water carefully to search for a big catch. He had done this many times before instead of purchasing fish or buying a fishing rod, and he found it to be more enjoyable even as it seemed silly from whoever watched his struggle to catch fish bare-handed.
Scara was beyond astonished as he watched. He had recalled Kaedehara having a good sense of hearing, but he had never expected to an extent, or maybe there was more for Scara to learn about being a wanderer. Surely, he must learn everything in the book before he joined the Fatui. "Well.."
The water was clear enough to the point that smooth rocks and common fish could be seen swimming around Kazuha's legs. He stood still with his eyes glued to the water below him as he prepared for a fish to swim by. The sun was relatively blocked out by the trees' shade that afternoon, but it glimmered on the water's surface making Kazuha appear in a different light. His hair illuminated again just like the night before, but with the sun's light, Kazuha appeared like a grand samurai with a radiance that warmed his soul. If Scara had ever seen a real fairytale prince, Kazuha caught in that moment would be the best embodiment.
Kazuha jolted downwards and the water splashed around him for a moment before he stood again, bare-handed. "This might take a while," he smiled at Scara, hoping he wouldn't make himself appear any more clumsy than he already was.
"I don't mind waiting," Scara's words were slow, but that was partially due to the fact of the emotions he felt at that moment.
Firstly, how in Teyvat did Kazuha not mind getting his clothes wet? Scara, being raised in Tenshukaku all his life, which really was for too long, was a sheltered prince. The idea of getting his hands dirty made him feel icky and grossed out.
Secondly, how could he become any cooler than he already was? Is Kazuha plotting to manipulate me like the others? Or betray me? Maybe Kaedehara was trying to seduce me all along-! Wait, why would I think of this now? A big splash startled him out of his thoughts as he turned to Kazuha.
This time, this fish was much bigger than the ones he had caught in Liyue. Kazuha smiled brightly at Scara as he headed back to the dryland with the fish in one of his hands, "Got one."
Scara was dumbfounded as he could only stare. No, wait. Maybe I'm overthinking everything. What would he gain from manipulating me? He doesn't even know who I really am. "You really caught one. Bare-handed, at that..!" he muttered in disbelief before clasping his hands together. "I'm quite impressed."
Kazuha's hair was a little wet but mostly his clothes, leaving him no choice but to take them off to hang up on a branch to dry. "It's not all too much compared to what I would make you if I had all the ingredients I really wanted, but I only feel it's right if I made it up to you for the trouble I caused you last night."
The fish was still flopping around as Kazuha placed it on a rock and picked up his sword. He turned to Scara, remembering the other had never seen him prepare the food before. "It'd be best if you don't watch the following parts. I wouldn't want to ruin your appetite," Kazuha sympathized as he held the fish down from escaping.
When Kazuha first became a wanderer, he naturally always felt a great sacrifice was being made when he began to personally make his food from the first step of hunting and gathering. It took him a while to be able to eat the same when he made his own meals, but he wasn't sure how someone like Scara would handle it. He could sense the differences in their statures from the very beginning.
"Oh." Scara naturally turned around; he didn't want to see what the insides of a fish looked like raw. "Thank you, Kazuha, for everything." He felt himself getting emotional again, and he wasn't sure if it was a good or bad thing any more.
Once Scara turned around, Kazuha turned his attention back to the fish and held it still, "You're welcome. But by how you say it, I can't help but feel we're getting closer to our final destination." With his blade still sheathed, he knocked the fish unconscious before he completely killed it. The task was bloody, but it was something had to get used to after repetition. He could remember the first time he had done so, it was messy and almost traumatic. Just thinking of that first time long ago made him a little queasy.
"We are."
"It will be our final goodbye, won't it?"
It was silent for a time. Scara couldn't find it in him to answer the truth, especially given Kazuha's ultimate end would be sacrificed for Scara's beginning in the Fatui.
"You don't have to answer now. I understand." Once the fish was cut up into clean pieces and cleaned, Kazuha washed his bloody hands in the river. Even if the blood did wash away into the flow of nature, he always felt it there.
"All done now. All that's left is to set up a fire and cook whatever else we might find," Kazuha said as he began to unpack tools from the bags to cook. "I'll set up the fire while you can go look for anything else you want," he smiled at Scara. "And I'll boil some water for tea once you get back."
The idea of tea and a nice warm meal made Kazuha already look forward to settling down. Even if he travelled often and cooked with what he could find alone, it was a luxury to eat with someone. Just as he had learned: 'Sadness is eating alone'.
"Oh, and there's a chance that there are potatoes or radishes, so do look out for those too," he said as he set down a heap of branches into a pile near the bank.
It seemed that Kazuha was evading the topic on purpose for his sake, but it nonetheless was comforting to know there was no pressure in their friendship or with the time they had left. It was all just up to Scara and how fast the Shogun would catch up with him.
"Alright, I'll be sure to find something good," he forced himself to smile before waving and running off into the forest. He didn't understand why he was running away, but maybe that was just how much of a coward he was. Every time he was presented with a human that seemed to have good intentions, it always ended in betrayal, so who was to blame him for feeling this way?
Once Scara got deep enough in the forest, he stopped running and felt his chest ache. It didn't make sense how his heartless self could hurt so much, but Kazuha had brought a new and confusing way to do so.
"Come on. I can't be getting worked up again," he slapped his face and pushed on through the darkening forest. All kinds of branches, thorns, and leaves seemed to catch on his clothes until he utterly didn't care if he would end up bruised and bleeding by the time he got those potatoes, mushrooms, or whatever.
"Screw this damn forest, and screw this damn weather. Just had to make me feel more like shit, huh?!" he shouted out to the sky before he hung his head low. "I don't remember getting so pissed all the time, or maybe being with Kazuha has made me relax more- Wait, no. Snap out of it!" He slapped his face again but with both hands. "I need to stop thinking about that Kaedehara boy and just focus on getting food...even if I don't even need to eat."
Just then, Scara had a feeling he was getting closer to some radishes or carrots. A few familiar plants led him to the green leaves that shot up from the ground. "Perfect, some carrots." He looked around, then down to his clean, pale hands. He really didn't want to do this, but how else would he get the carrots out of the ground.
After struggling with the dirt and avoiding staining his clothes, Scara eventually gathered two carrots. He pat off as much dirt from his hands as possible, but it was no use. "I'll just have to wait until I get back to wash my hands, I guess."
Looking up to the sky, the sun indicated the time to be around five in the afternoon. It wouldn't be long before the sun set and he'd really have a hard time finding his way back.
"I just have to find something that Kazuha can cook with, and then I can get the hell out of here," he sighed and continued on. "Who am I kidding? This is all crazy. How did I even get the guts to get all the way to Snezhnaya? Oh, right. I don't even have one."
The rustle of leaves shocked Scara out of his grumbling. He stared at the bushes until a white bunny emerged. "What are you looking at?" he stared down at the creature. It was just yet another organic being in this world, but he always felt a connection to animals and kids since they never really possessed the ability to be evil, just pure lifeforms.
The bunny stared at him with its wide and piercing red eyes. It reminded Scara a bit too much of the man he was basically running errands for by this point, but maybe that was the problem. He had begun to think of Kazuha non-stop, enough to the point where he seriously debated his decisions in life just to keep the man alive.
"Fine. You'll die soon anyway since it's difficult for an albino bunny like you to hide in greenery," he knelt down to the bunny and held out a carrot to it.
It hesitated at first, but the bunny began to shift out of the bushes and sniff the carrot before taking a bite. The look in its eyes was so simple, but red eyes had begun to make him scared. Kazuha had red eyes, and according to his lessons on literature, red symbolizes anger and danger..but it also symbolizes ambition...and love.