2016
The ringing in Natasha's ears caused by the explosion was starting to fade away only to be replaced by the echo of T'Challa's words. I'll kill him myself. She barely knew the Wakandan, but somehow that made her feel anxious, despite knowing Barnes was innocent. The memory of their goodbye was still fresh in her mind, causing an involuntary smile once in a while, as it happened only five days before. Romanoff went to Lagos straight from Romania, where she met with the rest and since then things were going only downhill.
It couldn't have been him. A man who smiled so sincerely while watching a video of his daughter singing getting interrupted by her giggling, on repeat not so long ago. They were laying side by side, with Natasha nestled to his side and her head resting on his shoulder. While he was focusing on the recording, she only had eyes for him, for that utter awe on his face and grin widening with each second.
It wasn't him. Something was wrong and she was sure of it.
The screen of her phone lit up with a notification of a new message. It was from Laura, asking her to call her as soon as she can. A few seconds later, just as she finished reading the first one, the second one came, informing her that Katya saw the news and is almost hysterical with worry about both her parents.
The kids were rather not interested in daytime television, especially the younger Romanoff, but of course this one time, she had to watch the goddamn news. She still didn't know that Natasha reunited with her father over a year ago.
She quickly typed a reply, letting Laura know that she was okay and that she'll call later. She cursed under her breath when another message came, asking what should she tell the girl about Barnes. After a moment of hesitation, Natasha wrote 'Just tell her that I promise that it wasn't him and that he's safe.', hoping that the second part will turn out to be true.
She felt bad about keeping it from her, even though she was occasionally slipping some hints about it here and there, for example suggesting she could draw him something for his birthday and pretend that it was a present, even though she can't give it to him - Natasha did that for her and not long before. She did it also the other way around, passing a gift from James to her, which he bought from that scant amount of money he had, as he refused to take any financial help from Romanoff and later Laura, who was concerned about him much more than Natasha expected when she told her everything.
The birthday gift from him consisted of a book, The Hobbit, and a bunch of sweets that brought Katya a great amount of joy, even if she didn't know who was behind that present and also didn't know the simple story of why she got exactly that book. Reading Hobbit and enjoying it was one of the few memories James had of his life before the war. He also owned a copy of that book, but his was second-hand, while Katya's was brand new.
Natasha remembered the scrunch of the girl's forehead when she read the note inside, a short birthday wishes written in Russian, addressed to zvezdochka. Romanoff had no idea if she made any connections, but even if she did, she didn't say anything.
Somehow Katya never had any more visions about him, nothing that could reveal that her mom was keeping things from her. From Natasha's point of view, nothing stood in the way of finally confessing to the girl. Nothing, aside from James' constant concern about his daughter's safety. Each time she started the subject, it ended up the same. With him saying that he doesn't want anything to happen to her because of him and since he came to terms with never seeing her again before, waiting for a little while longer won't hurt him.
So Natasha kept quiet. She didn't push, didn't force, respecting his wishes and instead patiently waited for Barnes to finally change his mind. She could've told Katya anyway. But how would she explain why he doesn't want to see her? There was a chance she would somehow understand but despite her past and everything that made her different from an average kid her age, she was still just a kid. And knowing about that unique bond she had with him, she wouldn't risk making her feel unwanted, even as a misunderstanding.
Her phone came to life once again, with an incoming call this time. She sighed at the name she saw on the screen. Steve.
She accepted the call. "Yeah?"
"You all right?"
"Yeah, thanks, I got lucky," she answered as her brain started to work at a higher speed as she tried to decide if she should take the matter into her own hands and start the unavoidable subject before he does.
"I know how much Barnes means to you. I really do."
If someone could know that, it was Natasha. She knew both sides of that relationship, that Steve still cared and James didn't. He couldn't, even if a part of him wanted to.
And now to the less pleasant part.
Natasha sighed. "Stay home, you'll only make this worse. For all of us. Please"
"Are you saying that you'll arrest me?"
She wouldn't do that. But she still remembered that promise with a pinch of a threat she made him last year. Considering the way circumstances changed since then, she would have even more reason to take upon it.
"No. Someone will if you interfere, that's how it works."
"If he's this far gone, Nat, I should be the one to bring him in."
"Why?"
"Because I'm the one least likely to die trying."
Natasha had to stifle a scoff. It was bullshit, but that was another thing she had to keep to herself. Rogers' chances were the same as everyone's. Aside from hers. She knew Steve wouldn't listen. He would do it his way. And he would screw it up in the process because one mention of Barnes was all it took to take away his logical thinking.
With that in mind, she made another decision. Hoping their talk will stall him enough for her to get there first, she knew it was time to go back to Romania.
⧗
The apartment was quiet and empty. Aside from the noise coming from the street, the only sounds were the barely audible footsteps. Captain America looked around, moving slowly and carefully, trying to catch as many details as possible. The space was almost bare, but despite that, there were some obvious signs that someone was living there. Someone, who could barely make ends meet, but tried to make it a home.
The side table made of wooden pallets, some extra ones stood against the wall. Newspapers lying around. A mattress with a sleeping bag on top of it and two pillows. A jacket was thrown over the back of the couch. Something else was lying there and caught a stray ray of sunshine, reflecting it, almost causing Steve to squint. He crossed the room and picked it up. A delicate chain with a star-shaped pendant dangled from his fingers. A simple necklace with a broken clasp. He put it back where he found it, ignoring the thought that it seemed oddly familiar like he saw it somewhere before.
In the kitchen, a few dirty plates on the counter, a butter knife next to them. Some basic ingredients like flour and sugar on the shelves above, next to bowls and a mug. Clutter on the top of the fridge. Rogers took a few cautious steps and came closer. Beneath some candy, there was a notebook with a few tabs sticking out of it. Mostly blue, much less red, and a single green and purple one. Underneath was an unevenly folded piece of paper. The visible edge had some color on it, suggesting that it could be a drawing.
Steve decided to ignore it and picked up the notebook instead before haphazardly opening it on one of the pages with a red tab sticking out. The first thing that caught his eye was the fact that the pages were covered with one word, repeating over and over again, but before he could make out what exactly it was, something fell out from between the pages. It fell slowly, swaying gently before landing soundlessly on the floor, face down. Something was written on the back but unfortunately for Rogers, it was in a different alphabet. He never learned cyrillic.
Steve bent down to pick it up. It turned out that it was a photograph. Both faces captured on it were familiar, one much more than the other. Yet he didn't expect to see either of them there. Frozen in time, staring at him from the photo, were Natasha and the white-haired girl he only met once before, at the Bartons. It took him a moment to recall her name. Katya. The paper had crinkled corners, one edge was delaminating and a stain was near it like it got wet somehow. The caption at the bottom said January 2010.
Only after Sam warned him through comms about the German Special Forces approaching, Rogers finally got his attention away from the picture and noticed what was that word, that covered both pages he saw.
Natalia.
And only one sentence, squeezed at the bottom of the right page stood out.
"She found me, she is real."
Steve put the photograph back between the pages, trying to wrap his mind around what he just saw and find a reasonable explanation for why would he have this picture. If it was only Katya, he would understand. She was his daughter, which was still hard to believe. But Natasha was there too. And it was taken six years ago, so where did he get it?
Nothing else came to his mind and the only conclusion was that she was lying to him and he was scared to wonder for how long and how much he didn't actually know.
"Haven't your mother taught you that's not nice to break into other's people apartments?"
Rogers spun around to see two people standing in the doorway. He was sure before that knew both of them but at the same time felt like he never did. His childhood friend, Bucky, and on his left side someone alongside who he worked for the past few years and who he thought was also a friend. Natasha.
Her gaze fell to the notebook he was still holding. "And also going through people's things" she clicked her tongue "That's not very polite, Steve."
"And lying to your friends is?" he replied harshly. "Haven't your mother thought you that?"
"I never had a mother so the joke's on you." Natasha shrugged. "And never lied to you. You just don't know how to listen, because I'm pretty sure I told you to stay home."
She took a step forward, but Bucky caught her by the arm. It took Steve a moment to realize why. He wanted to stop her. He assumed Rogers was a threat. His stance changed like he was ready to protect her, a glimpse of worry flashing through his eyes as he glanced at Steve with uncertainty. Natasha looked back at him and shook her head.
"Vse v poryadke" Steve didn't understand a word she said but her tone changed to a much softer, almost soothing one. There was no trace of that bluntness she spoke to him with. "On ne prichinit nam vreda."
Bucky held her gaze for a moment before he nodded slightly and took a step back. First, she walked to the couch to pick up a necklace he noticed before and slipped it into her pocket. That's why it looked so familiar. Now he remembered that he saw her wearing it on multiple occasions recently. Then she stopped in front of him and took the notebook from his hands.
Rogers took his eyes away from Natasha's doings for a while and looked back to Barnes. He still seemed very cautious, almost defensive. "Do you know me?" he asked.
His eyes snapped back from Romanoff to Steve. He stared at him silently for a moment before speaking up. "You're Steve. I've read about you in a museum."
"I know you're nervous. You've got plenty of reason to be." Rogers tried approaching him but he backed away. It hurt, deep down. "But you are lying."
"He's not." Natasha chimed in.
She was crouching down and knocking on floorboards. After a few tries, she found what she was looking for and picked a loose one up. From underneath the floor, she pulled out a backpack. She put the notebook inside and threw it at Bucky. He caught it effortlessly.
"You pulled me out of the river, why?" Rogers kept pushing.
"I don't know."
"Yes, you do."
"Enough of it, you'll get to be delusional later." Romanoff cut the discussion off and walked past Steve, bumping into him, most likely on purpose. "We're about to have company. Can I trust you to help him get away safely?"
Rogers stared at her from under furrowed brows, sure that she was joking. She was asking him if she could trust him. He had to stifle a laugh. He should be the one asking that.
"Steve, we don't have all day." she hurried "Either I can trust you and you'll help him or get lost before someone notices."
Captain America looked away and sighed before finally nodding.
"There's an old S.H.I.E.L.D safehouse a few streets from here, he knows the way," she instructed quickly. "Just make sure he gets there and gets away before you get recognized."
"And what about you? What are you gonna do?"
"I have an image to uphold," she said, closing the distance between her and Bucky. "And someone has to be able to get you out of jail if you fuck this up," she added, looking back at Rogers over her shoulder.
He wanted to mockingly thank her for the vote of confidence but what she did next, caught him off guard. She said something to Barnes quietly, almost whispered. His eyes never left her face, and his gaze softened. The way he looked at her, like he was in awe, despite his body remaining tense. He reached for her hand and squeezed it. Then her free hand found its way to his neck and pulled him closer, to a kiss. It was rather short, just slightly more than a peck, but it looked so natural, almost like a habit, something they did on a daily basis and at the same time so intimate, that it made Steve feel like he should look away and wonder what else he didn't know yet.
"Idi, ya naydu tebya pozzhe, mili moi."
And just like that, she was gone, seconds before German authorities broke in.
translations:
"Vse v poryadke (...) On ne prichinit nam vreda." - "It's alright (...) He won't hurt us."
"Idi, ya naydu tebya pozzhe, mili moi. - "Go, I will find you later, my dear."
marathon 1/6 :)