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~~Newt's pov~~
Y/n and I go to breakfeast together after we talked.
I didn't get real answers. She sounded really confused.
But she made me confused, too.
But okay, it's fine.
The boys at our table all smile as Y/n, and I sit down.
"Well, where have you two been?" Minho asks.
"Just talking, why?" Y/n replies.
"Talking about what? Last night?" Winston says.
Some start to laugh a little, and others are trying to hold their laughs in. What does he mean, last night? Do they know about last night? That Y/n tried to kiss me? I look in a little panic at Y/n. She looks away, her cheeks having a pink color.
"What about last night?" I ask them, knowing Y/n can't handel this on her own.
"Do you not remember it, Newt?" Winston answers me.
"There was like this bonfire, don't know if you heard about that. And only two people left it early, you two. And at night, I randomly woke up, from Y/n, calling your name. I don't think I need to make a drawing?"
All the boys laugh, Y/n lays her head on the table, trying not to get involved in the conversation. So I'll have to deal with it.
"That's just ridiculous, you Shanks. Yes, we left early. Because I was tired and Y/n was drunk. I put her in bed and left her room. And I heard it too, but I wasn't there with her. Y/n talks in her sleep sometimes, that's all."
"Okay, okay, I see. So, Y/n, tell us about your dream?"
"I uhm... I can't remember them, actually."
"Sure you don't," Winston laughs.
"Come on, shanks, leave her alone. There's nothing between us. Now stop joking about it before Alby throws me in the Pit."
~~End of Newt's pov~~
A few days go by in the Glade, and both Y/n and Newt try to find out what's going on between the two of them.
Y/n's sudden attempt to try to kiss Newt has made them both confused. There's something between them that they don't have with any other Glader.
So they both try to figure out what it is, seperetly. They don't talk about it with each other or with anyone. They both start to get nervous when it's just the two of them.
This way, it's getting more obvious for the other Gladers. They see the way they act around each other. Both getting nervous, blushing, always looking for each other but are still saying there's nothing.
The only one that doesn't suspect anything is Alby. He's just too busy and all the Gladers, mostly Y/n's and Newt's friends, stop talking about it when he is nearby. Everyone knows there's a rule that forbits them from dating, if Newt and Y/n ever say they like each other. That's why they don't want Alby to find out. The Gladers who know about it want them to be together.
Gally decided to go and talk with Newt.
"What do you wanna talk about, Gally? Did a builer get hurt again?"
"No, Newt, that's not it. I need to ask you something."
"You can ask me anything."
"You feel a connection with Y/n, too, don't you?"
Newt fronws his eyebrows in surprise of his sudden question.
"What do you mean? Feel a connection, too?"
What connection does Gally feel with Y/n?
"Well, don't get me wrong, I do not like her, not in that way. I just think we were somehow connected in the past. And I think you do too."
"I didn't think of it that way. But maybe, yes, I think so."
"You're in love with her, aren't you?"
Newt stays silent for a moment. Then, he takes a deep breath.
"I don't know. But I know it can't. There's a rule that says no dating, so no feelings."
"Yes, and we are the ones that made that idea come true. It was our suggestion, to protect her from guys who fall in love with her."
"Gally, what's your point here?"
"If you are in love with Y/n, which you probably are, think about it. Think about it really good.
I would love to see the two of you together. And you are second in commended, Alby trusts you enough to let the rule disapaire.
But think about it. Don't be the shank that will eventually break her heart.
If you really want her, you'll have to take everything. And don't tell her how you feel if you're not sure. Or if you don't know what you want to do with your feelings.
Do you get what I'm saying, Newt?"
"Yes, you're right, Gally. I needed to hear that. I won't say anything yet, I need to figure it out for myself first. It's okay, we're the best of friends anyway."
"Thanks man, sorry to interfere in your love life."
Gally isn't the only one that has the idea of talking to one of the two.
Minho decided to go and talk with Y/n about it.
'Hi, Y/n, I need to talk with you. Do you have some time?"
"Of course. For you always."
"There is something that graps my attention lately in the Glade. And I'm not the only one who sees it."
"What is it?"
"You and Newt, the way you act around each other."
"What's so special about it?" Y/n asks, a bit nervous.
"I need to tell you something else first. That night, when you were saying Newt's name in your sleep, I also heard that.
I was already awake, and you said something the others didn't hear. You said something as 'I can't lose you.'
And you actually sounded scared and worried. Do you really not remember the dream?"
"No, I don't. But I can tell you, I'm not afraid of losing Newt?
Like, what does that even mean?"
"Maybe it was more a memorie than a dream from in the Glade."
Y/n looks confused at her friend.
He continues: "I think you might be dreaming about the past, and that's why you can't remember it. I don't know, I have no idea how this all works, but that's just what I think.
I think you might have known Newt in the past."
Y/n thought the same, because sometimes being with Newt feels familiar.
"Why are you telling me this now, Minho?"
"Do you like Newt? As in, more than friends?"
"Why do you think that?"
"Girl, It's obvious that there's something. You can see it with the lights out.
Lots of Gladers see it. Please just be honest with me and answer the question."
"Uhm... I think so... maybe a bit?"
Minho smiles, happy she's finally admitting it, at least a bit.
"Then why are you keeping it quiet for everyone?"
"Because I can't have feelings for any Gladers. Newt and Gally are the ones that came up with the rule. It would be like... like an illicit love affaire."
"Illicit? I'm not even sure what that means. Who uses that word?"
Y/n laughs. "I don't know. I think it's from a song that I kinda remember. I don't know how it goes or who it sings. But I do remember that word 'illicit' and that it was in the song."
"Wow, I wish I could remember something from a song. Why don't they let us have some music in here?"
"I have no idea, it sucks. But anyway, Newt won't break his own rule."
"Come on, Y/n, you don't give up that fast and easily. And don't be so sure about that.
I think, if Newt feels the same way, they will consider letting it drop."
"Yeah, if he feels the same way, which he probably doesn't."
"Listen to me, Y/n, I know Newt. I've been his best friend for years. I've known his when he was sad, depressed, even tired of his life.
All before you were even here. And we both know what big decision he made that one morning.
But since he told you about it, since he finally trusted you, he's never been the same after that.
He wasn't that depressed anymore, because you were there. You make him happy Y/n, lots of times. I can see how he's changed because of you.
I maybe can't be 100% sure he's like in love with you. But I know you both need each other. So I think you should maybe talk with him about it."
"Waw Minho. It's really sweet that you're telling me this. But I can't just go to him and say that I like him."
"Tell me about it, what do you like about him? How do you really feel?"
"I like a lot of things about him.
He's literally the sweetest person ever. The way he cares about me and always wants to protect me.
He's like my safe place, you know. I know I can always go to him if there's something wrong or if I just want to say something random.
He will always listen to me. And he's like so cute and handsome."
Y/n is smiling and blushing as she's talking about Newt.
"Why can't you tell him that?" Minho asks.
"Mostly because of the rule. I don't want to cause any trouble. But I also kinda want to tell him.
Being in love like this, it's like the best feeling ever, but it's killing me slow.
It's all so confusing. And I'm nervous all the time when Newt's around.
And just feeling these butterfly's in my stomach, but knowing I can't let them free. It's hard, Minho, it really is."
"That's why I think you should ignore the rule and just tell him Y/n."
"But what if I do, and Newt does feel the same way? And we actually start like dating. What if we don't really work out, and we break up sooner or later?
Or what if he doesn't feel the same way, and we lose each other as best friends? Or what if he feels the same way, but Alby keeps the rule, and we just have to ignore our feelings.
Newt's heart is glass, I don't want to drop it.
In so many ways, he can get hurt. And I really can't have that. Who knows what will happen then, Minho?
What if he jumps again?"
"He won't do that, Y/n.
And, what if it doesn't go in any of those ways?
What if, you tell him how you feel. And he feels the same way, what many people think. And Alby is actually a human and let you guys date.
Then, you'll both be the happiest you've ever been."
"I just need more time to think about it, Minho."
"Alright, I get it. I won't tell anyone about it. Come here." Minho says, and he gives Y/n a hug.
"You know Minho, I also think i've known Newt before we were put in the Glade. It sometings feels familiar when I'm with him, you know?"
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