Trigger warning- This chapter contains mention of self harm.
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The entire hospital was alarmed as Neil had informed them on prior basis.
Akira was rolled into the hospital with Abhimanyu holding her hand firmly, leading them to the operating theatre.
"Okay team, we need to find out the poison that she consumed to find out the antidote.
Now, quick, quick, quick! Send her samples to the testing lab as soon as possible.", Mahima Birla commanded her team.
"Its not poison. Its a case of over dosage.
Sleeping pills and panic attack medicines.
I know the composition, I know the brand, drug company and have the bottles with me."
Mahima looked at her Nephew, talking mechanically, breathing shakingly and losing control on himself.
"Okay Abhimanyu, great!
Now, it will so easy for us to start working on her, you did the best help.
Look at me, you'll have to stay calm son.", she spoke with motherly affection.
"Please save her, I'll die from guilt.", he pleaded with tears streaming down his eyes.
"I'll not let anything happen to her, you'll have to trust me my kid."
"Team, get working, we need to flush out the medication from her system. Take notes from Dr. Abhimanyu to know the composition.", she switched from her motherly figure to the practical doctor in an instant, keeping a control on her emotions.
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They kept waiting outside the OT, the Birlas and the Goenkas for an hour before the operation room lights were turned of and exited Mahima.
Abhimanyu rushed towards her, pleading a question with his eyes.
"She out of Danger.", she said with a smile.
And for the first time today, he was able to breathe normally.
Addressing the other waiting people, she announced.
"She will gain consciousness within a few hours, probably by the evening.", and they all took a sigh of relief.
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She tried to open her eyes but the lights felt a little too much brighter, making it difficult for her to open them.
Suddenly she felt the lights were dim and she adjusted easing.
Opening her eyes, as she expected, she saw her Abhi near the switch board, making sure not even the lights are harming her.
She saw him walking towards the bed, but frowned when he didn't even utter a single word and started noting down her vitals.
Before she could say anything, Kairav barged into the room, weeping horribly.
"We know we deserve to be punished but this big of a punishment Akshu?", he sobbed.
Seeing her brother cry so bitterly pained her.
"I know we dont deserve your forgiveness but why are you punishing yourself? My chotu sister don't deserve this, please never again try to harm yourself, I beg you my chotu, my baccha.", he said slowly creasing her hair.
"Sorry.", all she could utter in a mere whisper.
"Just rest baccha, take care.
We all are not allowed to meet you at once, but this time we are going to be there, you want it or not."
She slowly turned her head to see her family standing by the glass partition, looking shattered, folding there hands before waving her bye and she noticed Aarohi blowing her a kiss, as they used to do as a kid whenever leaving each other.
Kairav kissed her hands gently holding them in his hand before kissing her forehead and taking his leave.
Once he left she saw Abhimanyu still not paying any attention to her but taking of the medicines and injections.
She wanted to talk to him, apologise to him, just say his name but her throat felt parched as a desert making it unable for her.
"Water.....", she whispered, which was caught by Abhimanyu even when it was barely audible.
He made her bed into a reclining position before holding the glass near her mouth.
She started sipping slowly with her eyes focused on him, but he won't even look at her, keeping his focus on the glass.
She shook her head slowly making him aware that it was enough, he pulled back the glass and wiped the remnants of water droplets with the tissue.
As, he turned around to keep the glass back, she held his wrist.
"Abhi....", she spoke softy.
"Akira!", both of them looked towards the source of this voice.
Nielima stood by the door, huffing with anger.
"Mumma.", she called out happily.
"Don't call me that.
No, Akira don't.", as she marched towards her stupid daughter.
"I saved you that day. For what? For this day? When you try to kill yourself?
How can I be your mother when I failed to keep you safe even after saving you.", she was so disappointed.
"No, mumma, no. Please, don't say that.", as Akira hugged her by the waist.
"I didn't tried to kill myself, trust me mumma it was an honest mistake.
I started panicking and hallucinating, no matter how hard I tried I just couldn't sleep, my restlessness got the best of me, as I completely lost count of my dosage.
Please don't abandon me mumma, I swear to God I didn't wanted to die, believe me, please.
Don't leave me mumma, I beg you, I have no one else.", Akira cried.
This mother's heart melted for her daughter as she creased her head gently.
"Akira, no bacche, please calm down, don't stress yourself.", as she sat on the bed.
"You are my child Akira, you are so important to me.
And if this is how you are gonna treat yourself, then at no cost I am ever leaving you alone, I'll be taking you back to Delhi with me, I don't care about your jobs or commitments, do you get me?", Neilima threatened her.
"I guess I'll leave now, her vitals are all normal, she is fine, you two should sort it out among yourself.", saying so Abhimanyu walked out of the door.
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"Dr Abhimanyu.", Mahima called out when he was about enter his cabin.
"Yes Taiji?"
"I need to discuss a few things with you. Let's get to your cabin."
Once they were inside Abhimanyu saw the line of worries on her forehead.
"What is it Taiji? You look very worried."
"Abhimanyu, we are definitely not evolving police and all in Akshara's case, it was not suicidal but rather a mistake of high dosage, if that's what she say, I don't want her to be more stressed by the interrogation of police.
But...."
"But what Taiji?", he asked concerned.
"Abhimanyu while operating of her we found some burn marks on her body--"
"Did that piece of shit Kunal even burned her?", the mere thought made his blood boil.
"No Abhimanyu, it's not that simple. We found them only in specific areas, her inner thighs, areas near her underarms, you know usually the parts that are not visible to other people.
The quizzing part is some of these are months old, some over the months, some as fresh as a week old, some as new as yesterday."
This information was dropped like a bomb on him, he finally was able to connect the dots, those lighters he found with her. It all infront of his eyes but he couldn't figure it out.
He felt like throwing out at this point.
"We need to get the details for the report Abhimanyu, we can't work on assumptions.", Mahima spoke with professionalism.
He just nodded.
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Neilima was asked to leave for the patient's checkup.
Infront of Akira was sitting Dr Mahima Birla, accompanied by Dr. Abhimanyu Birla with a notepad and pen.
"I want you to answer me honestly Akira.", Mahima said gaining a nod from her.
"We are not involving police in your case, discarding the chance of it being suicidal.
But there are a few things I want to know.
While operating we found various marks on your body, burn marks to be precise, some marks I know are of abuse so dont need to take those into consideration, but the burn marks? You are answerable for them."
Saying so, they both anticipated the answer.
Bowing down her head, Akira finally started to speak.
"I burn myself.
Its my coping mechanism.
Whenever the emotional pain becomes so unbearable I turn them into physical pain.
It helps me distract myself.
And honestly, the physical injuries are more tolerable to me than the emotional ones."
She spoke ashamed.
Abhimanyu felt sick in the stomach as he got up from the chair.
He took a deep breathe before thrashing the notepad and pen on the floor.
"I can't do this, I can't do this anymore.", as he slammed the door before leaving.
"He probably hates me now.", Akira cried.
"He doesn't hate you Akshara, he can't, it is impossible.
He loves you so much that the hate can't ever overtake upon that.
For the first time in his career, I have seen his emotions overpowering him, that's how much you and anything related to you affects him.
In this exact moment he hates himself, he hates himself that no matter what he do, he can never take your pain away, because you may never allow him to do so.", Mahima spoke patiently before leaving now drown in her own thoughts Akira alone.
Neilima saw Abhimanyu walking away in anger and she knew the worst is out.
"Abhimanyu listen to me.", as she followed along.
But Abhimanyu was in no mood to stop as he entered his cabin closely followed by Neilima.
"Please, don't give up on her."
"She hurts herself! She hurts the woman I love more than my goddamn life!
And I am the one giving up on her?
Do you have any idea, she literally burns herself!", he screamed on top of his lungs with so much pain and agony.
"I know."
"What? You know?", he asked in disbelief.
"I feel sorry for her for choosing this coping mechanism.
Don't look at me like that Abhimanyu, apart from a mother I am also a psychiatrist.
She is close to me now, but initially she was very distant from me also, it was hard for her to trust me.
And I was afraid, how will she cope like this?
I was doubting self harm, I have dealt with a thousand of such cases over my career.
My fear came true, I got it out of her mouth with the help of psychological tricks.
It all started just days after this incident, she had a nightmare and no matter how hard she tried she could not get it out of her mind, that is when preparing something in kitchen she burned herself accidentally and she discovered her coping tool.
She noticed how after getting the burn for hours her mind was just occupied by this pain rather than the hurt from past.
She confessed it to me, she has cried on my lap, begging me to make it stop, she wants to stop this.
But no matter how hard we both tried, something or the other pushed her towards her lighter again."
"Why does she have to suffer so much? It hurts me more than even death would.", he slumped back into his chair, holding his head between his hands.
"She was not suffering when you were there.", Neilima stated and he looked at her questioningly.
"You remember when you were in Delhi and Kairav's friend came to visit her. I thought she has reached her loose thread today and will harm herself again.
But she didn't, being with you was enough for her to let this pain go, she didn't even touched her lighter that day.
When you were there, I saw her sleeping peacefully without any sleeping pills, like a child with a smile of content of her face, dreaming the beautiful days tomorrow will bring for her rather than the nightmares from the past.
She is fighting for so long, searching for a reason for every breathe she takes but now you are here, she'll still fight but now atleast she knows a reason."
Abhimanyu had his eyes filled with tears, he couldn't gulp it down and say anything.
"I know you are tired my Child, rest for a while, maybe the rising sun will bring you both some new solace.", as she patted his shoulder.
Abhimanyu couldn't hold himself anymore, getting up he hugged her tightly.
"You have no idea, you have not only saved her, but you have saved me also."
He sobbed as she rubbed his back.
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A/N
We are heading towards the end soon guys.