Disclaimer- this chapter is set around Christmas..
IK ITS AUGUST BUT the timeline means the story is in December rn and I can't just gloss over the holidays?
I've tried to make it less overtly christmassy but apologise in advance 🫶
This is the very last thing I want to do. In fact, I couldn't think of anything much fucking worse right now.
This is my own personal form of hell.
Apologising.
Even the word pisses me the fuck off.
Maybe it's because I associate it with all of the empty 'I'm sorry's' I've received over the years. From my ex, my father, friends and teammates that have screwed me over for fame or money.
To me, an 'apology' just means words with no action. And that is the very last thing I want to give Nova.
Because I actually am sorry.
I'm still angry, I'm still disappointed, I'm still fucking infuriated by how awkward and shy she's been acting towards me these past few weeks.
But I am sorry for how I spoke to her. For how I let my anger get the better of me.
"Nova?" I knock on her open bedroom door, leaning my shoulder against the wooden frame.
Her fingers halt their rapid typing on her keyboard. She lifts her head from it's bent position but doesn't spin around in the desk chair.
"Hey." I say to her, my voice coming out all rough.
"Uhm," Nova clears her throat, slowly spinning around in the chair to face me. "Hi?"
I don't say anything at first. Instead, I just study her.
My eyes trace the contours of her perfectly sculpted face and her glossy lips. My fingers itch to take her golden hair out of it's high ponytail and ease out the knots. My mind races at how beautiful she looks without makeup hiding her freckles.
She's stunning.
But she's also a pain in the fucking ass. And those two facts are in constant conflict with one other.
"What're you up to?" I ask hesitantly.
Nova blinks back at me in surprise. "What am I up to?" She repeats slowly.
It's like she can't quite believe my fucking nerve. And fair enough to her. I'm just as shocked as she is.
We've barely spoken a single word to one another since our big bust up in the park 10 days ago.
Since that damn argument, living here has been like we're both holding a fully loaded gun. Anything can set the other one off.
Yet, all of a sudden, I'm stood in her doorway asking about her college assignments? That's beyond fucking suspicious.
"I have an essay due after the new year." She tells me as she casts her eyes back to the computer screen and clicks the save button 6 times in a row.
I nod and edge my way further into the room. "Is it on anything interesting?"
She's going to see right through this bull crap,
"Not unless you find the debate on extracting bone marrow from embryos interesting?" Nova lets out a small chuckle at the mere thought that I could find her essay topic interesting.
I simply smirk back at her with a shake of my head because she's absolutely right. I don't find it all that interesting. "Not particularly."
"I guessed as much." She stifles another giggle and we fall into another fucking awkward silence.
I hate this. I hate this uncomfortable tension, this silence that seems to stretch on for miles. I hate that the last real thing I said to her was cruel. And I hate that I made her sweet, soft, voice yell.
But most of all; I hate that she knows I'm only up here because I want something. That's beyond fucking obvious.
The 2nd floor of the penthouse is only home to November's bedroom, 2 other guest beds, a couple of bathrooms and the entrance to our rooftop deck.
I hardly ever come up here unless I need something or want to go outside. And in the middle of winter in New York City, it's not fucking likely that I want to use my damn swimming pool or sun loungers.
"Is there-" Goldilocks clears her throat as she pushes herself up from the desk chair. "Do you need help with anything or are you just up here to... talk?"
I grimace. "I, uh, I need to ask you something. It's about Stanley whilst I'm away."
While I wait for her to form her response, I let my eyes briefly scan across her cluttered bedroom.
It's not messy but it is full. Full with memories I'm sure- given by what must be hundreds of polaroid photographs that litter her walls and trinkets that look to be from all different decades.
Vintage shit.
She's kept her walls white but I just know that it's going to be a pain in the ass for my decorator to remove the tape residue from her pictures once she's moved out.
After-all, this arrangement of ours isn't supposed to last forever.
"Is this your trip to go see your family in Washington?" November asks, shifting her weight from her left foot to her right.
She only fidgets when she's nervous.
"Yeah, my Mom gets pretty intense about the holidays so I'm kinda forced to show my face." I explain, already feeling bitter about my trip back home.
I get 4 days off from the season this year, for Christmas, and I made the grand mistake of telling my Mother that. Now she's expecting me to fly out to Seattle for the 23rd and spend each and every hour with her and my siblings.
It's not that it's too much of a burden, especially since I'm already flying out west for back to back games from December 19th.
The flight doesn't bother me. And hell, I do miss my Mom a little, but going back to Washington feels like taking taking steps backwards from where I am now. It's like regressing to my old, adolescent, naive self.
Talk about ghost of Christmas fucking past.
"I get that." Nova sighs in sympathy, wrapping her sweater tighter around her body. "My Mom is the same. It can get a little... crazy."
I jab my thumb towards her perfectly made bed and tilt my head as if to say 'Can I?'. Nova nods, a slight blush creeping up her cheeks, as I walk over and set myself down on the very edge.
She shyly looks down at her feet and giggles quietly to herself. I wonder if it's because my 6 foot 7 frame looks fucking ridiculous on the end of her sunflower print comforter, surrounded by her sea of stuffed animals.
The answer is: fucking probably.
"I know you're at college until the 19th but..." I take a deep breath and brace myself for her reaction. "I was wondering if you could fly out to Washington, with Stanley, for the 23rd?"
Nova's eyebrows shoot up in surprise. "Y-You want me to come to Washington with you? For Christmas? With your whole entire family?"
Now that is cute.
My smile is cast down at her bedsheets as I shake my head slowly from side-to-side.
"No, Goldilocks."
She instantly stiffens up at that. At my nickname for her.
It's the first time I've said it in nearly 2 weeks and damn, does it provide me with a rush of relief. It's almost like everything is back to normal. Back to how it should be.
But to her, it probably just sounds foreign and strange. Like a bitter reminder of how we used to be civil before our big blow up.
"I would never ask you to abandon your own family on Christmas, or expect you to work around it." I explain.
"I was just hoping that you could fly out with Stan, keep him company and deliver him to my Mom's house so that they can finally meet. Then I'd fly you back out here in time for Christmas Eve."
She begins to silently mull over my request, her lips pursed in thought. I can practically see her weighing up the pros and cons of the jobs, most likely overthinking every possible outcome.
So I decide to make the choice a little easier for her.
"All paid for by me. 1st class ticket and a holiday bonus."
She immediately perks up at that. "1st class?"
"You'll have the comfiest seat." I confirm.
"And this bonus..." Nova smirks at me. "How big are we talking?"
"It will be 2 days before Christmas and you'll, effectively, be working. Just name a price and it's yours, sweetheart."
My heart almost warms at her reaction. Beaming smile, sparkling eyes and her fingers no longer fidgeting anxiously. That's more like it.
"I'm sure we can work something out." She answers with a smirk. "And this is all to take Stanley to Seattle and fly straight home?"
"Not exactly." I tell her honestly. "I won't have my car down there so you'll have to get a cab from the airport to my Mom's place. It's about a 30 minute drive to our place in Sammamish."
Sammamish, King County is one of the wealthiest areas in the entire state. On average, houses sell for $1.6 million and, thanks to her $7 million divorce settlement from my dad, my mom is lucky enough to be own one of those home owners.
She's not overly comfortable with having paid so much for, in her words, 4 walls and a roof- especially since she grew up without so much as a dime to her name- but I convinced her that the house was a good investment.
And a fucking great way to spite my father.
"That's no problem. I like cab rides, especially if they're pre-paid for."
I roll my eyes. "Obviously."
"Great." She sighs, clasping her hands together. "Is that everything or is there more?"
Now this is where things get a little more complicated... "It's, uhm, not quite that simple. My mom, she's a little anti rich people and-"
Nova scoffs. "She's anti-rich people while living in Sammamish?"
"I know, it sounds fucking ridiculous, but she didn't grow up wealthy. The opposite actually." I tell her.
"She's never gotten used to the lifestyle so she struggles with the concept of having paid help in the home. You know, a maid, a chef- even a gardener. She fucking hates it."
I watch November closely as my words wash over her. Just as I suspected, the gears in her head begin to turn and she quickly puts together what I'm trying to tell her.
"You don't want your mom to know that I work for you..."
My lips twist into an uncomfortable grimace as I lift myself up off her bed. "It's nothing personal, Blondie. Mu mom will just start lecturing me on how I shouldn't have a dog if I can't take care of it myself and I don't have any energy for that bullshit."
Nova shrugs at me. "It's a valid point. I told you the same thing when we first met."
I smirk at one of my first memories of her, in that small dress, waitress apron on, and a nervous stutter. Me with my fat ass ego and damn ignorance.
How things have changed. Sort of.
"So how am I supposed to bring Stanley over to your house without your mom knowing who I am?" She leans her back against her dresser. "Should I just drop him off on the doorstep and make a break for it?"
My face remains stoic as I try to gage what her reaction might be to my plan. My guess is not fucking good- but I can't think of anything else.
I stroll in front of her, my head hanging low so I can catch her eyes as I speak. "There's only one thing I can think of..."
Nova tucks a stray strand of hair behind her ear and waits, with her bottom lip rolled up into her mouth, for my next words.
"You need to pretend to be my girlfriend."
A long stretch of silence follows, both of us unmoving.
I've never seen Goldilocks as stiff as she is now- almost statue like. It's almost as though she's frozen.
"I know it's a fucking crazy idea but-"
Nova scoffs. That's the first sign she's given me that she's not having a Goddamn stroke. "Crazy doesn't even begin to cover it."
"But," I stress, dragging my hand through my hair. "It could work. All it would take is a quick coffee to appease my mom and then we can make up some crappy excuse for you to leave."
She places her hands over her face. "Logan, I know next to nothing about you. If your mom starts asking questions there's no way I'll be able to answer."
"She's not going to pop-quiz you on facts about me, Blondie. We just need to get our story straight. The rest will be easy."
"You are greatly underestimating a mother's instinct to pry, Mr Romano."
She might be right about that. Especially since I haven't even mentioned a woman's name to my mom since I was in college. To go from that extreme to bringing home a 'girlfriend', she's bound to have questions.
My hope is that she'll be too busy being over the fucking moon that I've finally 'settled down' that she won't even notice any holes in our story.
My eyes scan her bedroom for anything I can scribble down on. Thankfully, Nova is one hell of a messy studier so her desk is littered with note books, crumbled up pieces of paper and sticky notes.
It's like a damn paper factory threw up over there.
I reach for her stack of post-it notes and her black pen besides them and scribble down the first notes that come to my head. The crucial information we need to remember to keep our story straight. I only end up with 5, short, bullet points but I'm hoping less is more.
And that my Mom won't do any snooping.
"Here." I pass the pink note to her. "Just remember these 5 things. That's all."
Nova scrunches up her nose as her blue eyes skim over the scrawled handwriting. "But what if-"
I place my hand on her wrist, drawing her attention away from overthinking and back to me.
"Those 5 things, Goldilocks." I tell her, leaving no room for arguments. "I will handle the rest. Okay?"
She anxiously gnaws on her bottom lip, her eyes glued to my hold on her wrist, before she sighs in defeat.
"Okay."
I allow myself to stroke my thumb across her bare skin, only once, and then drop my fingers.
"I'll see you on the 23rd, sweetheart."
✩✩✩
Anger travels in waves. For me at least, it always has.
One minute I'm perfectly fine and the next all I see is red.
When I was a kid, my Mom likened it to the incredible hulk- how he suddenly transforms into this rage-filled beast everybody struggles to control.
Of course, back then my anger was over stupid shit. Like if I could see broccoli touching my carrots on my plate or if my Dad forgot to put my toy boat into my bubble bath. I'm sure all kids throw tantrums over that kind of stuff but for me, it was a full blown, hysterical, meltdown. I'd be screaming, crying and kicking the living shit out of any object I could find.
All over finding a hole in my lucky socks.
That's when my mom decided to put me into my elementary school's pewee hockey team.
Aggressive kid? Aggressive sport. That was her logic.
And, as they say, the rest was history.
I still channel my frustration through hockey, I let it drive me. It's makes me a better player and, overall, a better man.
But now, as I stare at my teenage self's bedroom, all I feel is anger. And I don't have a hockey stick to help me out.
"God, I forgot how dusty it gets in here." Mom fusses as she draws the curtains back, sending beams of evening sun flooding into the room. "I'll come up with the vacuum and duster later. I can't have you falling asleep with it like this."
I drop my duffle on the ottoman at the end of the bed and turn to her, my arm stretched out so she can tuck into my side. "It's fine, Mama. I can clean it myself."
"Don't be ridiculous, Logan." She scolds, patting my chest. "I won't have your new girlfriend coming to stay with us and thinking I can't provide a clean room for her to sleep in."
And there it is. The inevitable stab of guilt I feel for lying to her.
"Mom, we've been over this. Nova isn't staying over, she's just bringing Stanley down and then flying back to New York."
She looks at me pointedly, her hands on her hips.
"That's the dumbest idea I have ever heard. I can't effing believe you're letting your girlfriend fly all the way out here just to drop off your dog! It doesn't make any damn sense, Logan."
I take my carry on bag from her hand, dropping it onto the crisp white comforter. "She has her own to spend Christmas with, Mom. You don't expect her to ditch them for us, do you?"
That quickly settles her frustration. "No, no, of course not. I just want to spend time with her, my love. Get to know the woman that's made my baby boy so happy."
I swat away her hand as she tries to pinch my cheeks. Even while I stand at 6 foot 7, my Mom still treats me like a little kid. "Who said anything about her making me 'so happy', hm?"
As much as my Mom's coming from a good place with her excitement, I need to seriously fucking downplay this fake relationship. If I don't, she'll get her hopes up all high and will be hiring a damn wedding planner.
That's the last thing I need. To lie and then devastate her when I tell her that we've broken up.
"Well, are you unhappy?" Mom quirks a brow up at me.
There's a real fucking sweet spot with this lie. I've got to act head-over-heels enough to make her believe it's real while also ensuring she doesn't get too attached.
It's fucking tricky work.
"No, I'm good. We're good." I tell her with a nod of my head. "She's good. She's amazing, really."
Mama's face is gleaming with delight as she takes my hand. "I'm so glad you've finally found someone to love and treasure you like you deserve, my baby. I can't wait to meet her."
"I'm sure you'll love her." She smiles at that, leaning up and planting a soft kiss on my cheek.
"One word of advice, though, my love."
I pull back from her and anticipate some batshit comment like 'get making those babies whilst you're still young' or 'don't hesitate to put a ring on that finger'. But instead, she surprises me.
"Put that photograph away." She gestures towards the frame sat on my left nightstand. "No woman wants to see a picture of her boyfriend's ex, especially with it propped up by your bed."
I follow her eye line and squint as the sun reflects off of the glass photo frame. Lucky for me, I don't have to be able to see properly to know what picture it is.
That's half the reason this room fills me with so much fucking rage.
"I'll take it down." I tell her, not looking back at her in fear of seeing unwanted pity in her eyes.
Mom runs her hand across my shoulder blades. "Good. It's about time we all moved on to happier things, hm?"
"Of course." My agreement is like music to her ears as she swipes a line of dust from the top of the TV.
"I'll be downstairs trying to force your brother into waking up. You give me a shout when her plane has landed, alright?"
If there's one thing to remember about Lily Romano, it's that she will never take no for an answer. So I don't even fucking bother.
"Yes, ma'am." I salute her, a small smirk on my face as I know how much she hates to be called ma'am.
She shoots me a knowing look before pulling the door shut behind her and leaving me, in my old bedroom, with nothing but painful, bitter, memories.
The first thing I do is approach my nightstand- the one with the picture on it. Her picture. And despite knowing this photograph like the back of my hand, I still study it inch for inch.
Ashton obviously looks 6 years younger than she does now, which makes perfect sense considering we're sure as shit not 21 anymore.
But she's still exactly how I picture her in my mind.
Gorgeous, of course. She always has been with her warm brow skin, deep brown eyes and neat black box braids.
I always thought she was the most beautiful woman in the room- in every room. And I never failed to tell her so. She knew how much I adored her.
It's just a shame she didn't adore me quite as much.
I let out a long sigh, one that I must have kept pent up for some time now, and pick the frame up from the wooden nightstand.
As I walk into my closet and pull down a box full of crap from the very top shelf, I can't help but feel my wave of anger disappear.
I feel the slow release of frustration as I shove the photograph into the box and effectively repress those memories further back in my mind.
And when I stand and place that box back onto the very top shelf, I can't help but think.
Ashton isn't the most beautiful woman in the room to me anymore. But November might just be.
1) we met after a home game at the bar
2) dating 3 months = not serious
3) i'm allergic af to peanuts. don't feed them to me
4) if mom asks, i'm nice but DONT GUSH - she cant think we're in love
5) you can't stay long. DO NOT LET HER TEMPT YOU NOVA!!
I've read Logan's note over 300 times- at least.
I kept it on my lap for the whole 6 hours of my flight from JFK to Seattle Tacoma airport. I mentally chanted the bullet points over and over, trying engrain them into my braincells before I'm stood in front of Logan's mom.
My confidence in our story is pretty solid. But I'm slightly worried I'll be too focussed on lying that I'll forget the truth.
God forbid Mrs Romano asks me what my dang name is. I'll start fumbling like a fool and will probably end up reciting one of my bullet points back to her.
"Are you alright, Miss?" The cab driver, Rick, asks me as I cling to Stanley's leash like my life depends on it.
Ever since losing him, I've been overly cautious. It's all extremely excessive but precautionary.
"I'm fine, thank you." I lie to the man, clearly getting into liar, liar, pants on fire mode.
My eyes are fixed to the car window as we barrel down the snowy roads. Not a lot is clear due to the incredibly heavy downfall but from what I can make out, this place is gorgeous.
And these house are freaking ginormous.
It had started to become blizzard-like way before my flight landed, which prompted a flurry of demanding messages from Logan.
I think my my favourite message was: 'Either this plane has crashed and you're dead or you're ignoring me. It best be the first option, Nova'.
That was a real treat to read after I managed to collect Stanley from the pet cargo area.
"Are you sure you're okay?" Rick asks again. "You look a little nauseas. Do you need me to pull over?"
"No!" I gasp immediately. I think if we stopped I'd jump out into the road and run all the way back to New York. "No, I'm good. Just nervous. Thank you."
As we get closer and closer to Logan's family home, my nerves only grow. And so does my disbelief.
I can't believe I'm doing this. That I agreed to this absolutely ridiculous scheme of his. That I'm about to play 'girlfriend' to a man that insulted my intelligence, professionalism and personality less than 2 weeks ago.
How we can go from screaming at one another, to barely speaking, to being all loved up in front of his Mom, I have no idea.
But I can at least try. More as an apology for what happened to Stanley.
As Logan firmly believes- actions speak louder than words and this is my action.
Lying to his whole family... Way to go Nova!
It's as the driver pulls into Logan's gated freaking community that I finally pull my phone out from my backpack and decide to face the music. I had been avoiding his text messages the whole ride over here.
Logan: I sent for a cab to get you. He's got a safe car for the snow
Logan: Text me when you've left the airport
Logan: Mom wants to know when to make coffee for
Logan: Nova ???
Logan: You're not dead again are you?
Logan: Don't make me come out and find your dead body in the snow
Me: 2 minutes away
Me: can you come help me with stanley please? 🙃
He responds immediately as the car's navigation calls '1 minute until you reach your destination'.
Logan: No😤
My brows shoot up as I type.
Me: no ?
Logan: I only help people who respond to my messages
Me: and I only 'date' people who help me with the 46 pound puppy in the car :)
"Is it this one on the right, miss?" Rick asks politely, drawing me away from my text conversation with my pain in the behind boss.
"Yeah, it's number 119 so-"I lift my eyes up and look out of the window to my right. To my complete shock, and horror, I immediately find house number 119.
Hidden behind the electronic security gates.
"Do you know the code?"
I gawk at the mere size of the building behind the gates and can't help but feel intimidated by its grandeur and perfection.
"Erm, no. Sorry I-" I stumble over my words, scrambling for Logan's contact on my phone. "I'll just call the owner- erm, my b-boyfriend."
Boyfriend. Yeah, right.
My phone almost rings through to Logan's voicemail before he bothers to pick up, and I'm absolutely positive that that he did that on purpose.
"Yes, dear?" He answers lazily.
I inhale deeply through my nose. "Honey."
He hums and I can practically feel the smirk on his lips. "What can I do for you?"
He knows exactly what he can do for me, smug bastard.
"Can you open the gate, please?" I ask him sweetly, offering Rick a reassuring smile. "And while you're at it, do you mind lending me a hand with your puppy that I flew across the country with?"
Logan has the dang nerve to chuckle at me from down the line. "Look back at the gate, babe."
I narrow my eyes at his patronising tone but still follow his instructions. And sure enough, as I look back at the security gates, they're slowly opening to reveal more and more of the gorgeous house that stands behind them.
And, unfortunately for me, they also reveal more and more of the gorgeous, smug as heck, man that grew up in said house.
"Happy now?" He says, the teasing irritating me even more now that I can see his face.
I don't bother replying, instead abruptly hanging up the call and turning my attention back to Rick. "I think you can park anywhere. Oh, and feel free to run over the jerk standing in your way."
"Trouble in paradise?" He asks, chuckling at me as he pulls into the paved driveway.
"Something like that." I mumble back, my eyes glued to the extreme show of luxury this driveway offers.
And I use the term 'driveway' loosely. It's more like a dang parking garage for sports cars and motorbikes. That is, of course, if parking garages have freaking fountains standing in the middle.
I admire the floor to ceiling windows, earthy tones of the walls and the perfectly pruned garden that frames the Romano family home. But the feature I'm most impressed by is the double story garage. A close second is the ginormous oak front door, expertly decorated with a Christmas wreath and garland.
Wow.
"Do you need help with your bags, Miss?"
My eyes reluctantly tear away from the house at the sound of Rick's voice. "Oh, uhm, I think he's going to help me... Thank you."
He nods in understanding and we both watch as Logan leisurely strolls up the path towards us.
He keeps his hands in the pockets of his grey sweats, his outfit screaming 'no fucks given' yet still managing to look more put together than I do on my very best days.
His face remains passive- his expression unmoving. To most, he would seem totally unbothered that there are people waiting on him.
But I know better. I know that he's taking his sweet, sweet, time just to rile me up. It's like he gets off on getting under my skin.
"You two make a sweet couple." Rick compliments, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel. "Strange. But sweet."
I look down at Stanley's face, which rests on my lap, and smile at his eyes expectantly peering up at me. "It's complicated. He's complicated."
He hums at me and nods towards Logan's reflection in his wing mirror. "I think I can see that."
I follow his eye line and smirk at Logan's bored expression as he reaches out to open my car door for me. Stanley instantly becomes alert at the noise of the door opening and scrambles up off my lap when his Dad finally comes into sight.
He jumps over my legs and pounces out the door, yapping excitedly. Thankfully, Logan anticipates Stan's enthusiasm and catches him as he leaps forward.
"Missed you too, buddy." He chuckles to the energetic puppy, ruffling up the red hair on top of his head.
I throw my backpack over my shoulder and pick up the duffle bag filled with Stanley's things, awkwardly shuffling my out of the backseat of the car.
"Thanks, Rick. Drive safe." I tell him sincerely before he waves me goodbye and turns back down the driveway.
"How was your flight?" Logan asks, now crouched down to fuss Stanley properly.
"Pretty shaky, to be honest. We hit some turbulence because of the snow and I was sat next to this poor woman and her screaming baby the whole time." I admit to him, shuffling around uncomfortably.
He peers up at me, hazel eyes filled with mischief. "I was asking Stanley but thanks for the update, Blondie."
"Oh." My lips drop from their forced smile into a straight line. "Well, let me update you again."
My grip on Stanley's ridiculously heavy duffle bag loosens and within seconds, it's dropping to the floor and landing with a loud thud.
"You grab the bag." A lightbulb goes off in my head and I slide my backpack off my shoulder, letting it join Stan's duffle on the floor. "Make that bags. It's the least you can do."
"No fucking way am I-"
"I'll be waiting by the door. Thanks, honey."
✩✩✩
This is a bad idea. A bad, bad, idea.
"You remember the notes I wrote for you?"
We're going to get caught. There's no possible way that we won't. Logan's family will see straight through me and my heaping pile of lies.
"Nova. It's only an hours coffee with my Mom. That's all."
And when we do get caught, Logan's going to have to explain that I work for him and that will be so freaking embarrassing after pretending to be his dang girlfriend all day!
"You overthink too much."
Not to mention Logan will probably be outraged that I let his secret slip because let's face the facts, Mr Stone-Cold won't be the one to crack. I'm the real liability around here.
"Seriously, Goldilocks, you have got to calm down. Everything is going to work out."
I don't think I can take another argument with him. I mean the first one was bad enough- all that yelling, name calling and insulting really took it the heck out of me.
Being mean is exhausting. Especially when it's with someone as infuriating as my boss.
"Nova, if you really don't won't to or if you've changed your mind, we can stop."
If anything was going to snap me out of my paranoid state, it was that sentencing coming from him. "Huh?"
"Really, it's okay if you want to call it all off." Logan shrugs casually. "I would never force you into something that makes you this uncomfortable."
"But you-"
"No buts. If you don't want to, then we won't. I'll call that cab right back here to drive you to the airport."
My eyes are cast down to my thick woollen socks. "I want to help you. It's just... Well, I'm-"
I stop short of the end of my sentence, the right words simply not coming to me in my panicked state. But thankfully, Logan takes the silence as permission to butt in.
"You're nervous. You don't want to fuck up and upset my Mom and you don't want to start a fight with me. And I'm guessing you're also a little embarrassed about this fucking crazy situation we're in?"
He never fails to comprehend exactly what I'm trying to say. It's almost spooky, but it does tell me that, even though our interactions are fairly limited, they're meaningful. This level of understanding proves it.
"Y-Yeah. I guess so."
Logan continues our slow walk down the long hall in his house. I think he said his Mom was setting up coffee in the TV room but I stopped listening after we stepped foot into this house.
My only thoughts have swarmed around this very moment. The meeting. The introduction.
Lily Romano- Logan's Mother. November Levine- Logan's 'girlfriend'. On what planet?!
"Blondie," He sighs as he drags his fingers through his dark hair. "You've done much tougher shit than this. And you've fucking killed it every time. This won't be any different."
My eyes finally leave their gaze on my shoes. When I crane my neck and look up, all I see is pure sincerity in Logan's eyes.
And that's the final boost of confidence I need.
"Okay. Let's get this over with"
His pink lips spread into the most devastating smile as he places his hands oh my shoulders. "That's my girl."
I'm going to spend the next 7 months- minimum- of my life trying to get over that singular sentence.
Damn him.
"Any last pro-tips?"
Logan takes his hands off my shoulders and instead interlocks my fingers with his, so naturally that it almost feels like this isn't a rouse. That this could be real.
"I think as long as you're polite, listen to her endless stories about her Summer abroad in Thailand back in the 80s and don't call her 'Mrs Romano' you'll be fine."
My heart sinks. "What the heck do I call her then? And why did you leave that detail out until the very last minute, you fool?!"
"It just popped into my head." He defends. "She's not married to my Dad anymore so she's not 'Mrs Romano' anymore. Just call her Lily."
"I cannot call her by her first name after we've just met! Don't you know how rude that is, I'll come across as a total B-I-T-"
"Ahem."
Oh. My. God. This is one of the worst days of my life.
"Sorry to interrupt you guys but... Mom wanted me to tell you that the coffee is starting to get cold so..."
Logan stiffens slightly and turns us to face the now opened living room door.
Standing against the doorframe with long dark waves, fluffy bangs that frame her perfectly oval face and eyes ever so slightly darker than Logan's, is a woman that can't be much older than I am.
She wears an off-white knit sweater- the kind that Rory Gilmore would wear- paired with a medium-wash denim skirt and tights. If I wasn't feeling so awkward right now, I'd be asking which stores she got the whole outfit from.
"We're coming in now, Gabi." Logan scolds her like she's still a child, which I'm sure she isn't. "Maybe if you were all a little more patient I-"
"And maybe if you didn't stand out here in the hallway, bickering like a fucking child, with the woman we're all so desperate to meet then I wouldn't of had to interrupt." She bites back, her tone just as clipped as her brothers.
I roll my bottom lip up into my mouth awkwardly, awaiting Logan's jab back, but I automatically freeze when the woman's brown eyes travel to me.
Her icy exterior instantly melts as she opens her arms and squeals. "November, it's so great to finally meet a nice girl Lo is dating for a fucking change! I'm Gabi, this dumbass' little sister."
I love her, I love her, I love her.
"It's so nice to meet you. Logan has told me amazing things." I smile at her and accept her warm embrace. She's clearly inherited the same tall gene as her brother, maybe standing at 6 foot. "And, please, call me Nova. Most people do."
"Most people?" Gabi chuckles as we pull apart.
I nod my head at her bored looking brother. "Logan prefers to call me an array of irritating nicknames. It's when he calls me by my first name that I know i'm really in trouble."
"Typical. He does the same thing with me and our other brother." She tells me, taking my hand and guiding me further into the living room. "I know if I hear an angry 'Gabrielle' comes out of his lips, I'm in for it."
"And it just so happens that you're in for it quite a lot, Gabs." Logan teases, trailing behind me with his large hand on the small of my back.
Gabi lets my hand go as we fully enter the room and Logan wastes no time in coming up closer behind me. His chest presses against my back as he places his other hand on my shoulder.
That's when I'm forced to remember what's really going on here.
This isn't real. I tell myself as a woman with lighter brunette, almost auburn, coloured hair in her mid-to-late fifties stands from an armchair.
He's just playing a part. My mind screams the reality check over and over again while she approaches me, her warm skin creased from smiling so wide.
"Mama," Logan starts, squeezing my shoulder reassuringly. "This is Nova. Nova, meet-"
"Lily- or Mom! Whatever you feel most comfortable with, darling." She gushes, taking my hands in hers and standing in front of me.
"As long as you don't call me ma'am and make me feel like an old lady, like my Goddamn son does, then I don't mind at all!"
"Thank you so much for having me, Lily." I push past my discomfort at calling her by her first name and smile back at her. "Your home is so beautiful. I can see why Logan loves it so much."
Logan has never mentioned his family home- or his family in general- to me before. Ever. I'm truly winging this entire experience and I feel bad for lying to the poor woman but I'll be damned if I'm not polite to her.
Manners don't cost you anything. Even if that means I have to tell a few white lies. It's worth it if I get to see the look his Mom has on her face right this second.
"Does he really? Here I was thinking Mr Big Shot, penthouse in New York, forgot all about his poor old Mom and his Washington roots."
I'd hate to be the one to tell her that, unfortunately, she's spot on. Logan is now a New York city boy through and through. He practically exudes Manhattan.
"No, no, of course not. He talks about you all constantly. I feel like I practically know you all already!"
Logan squeezes my shoulder again, this time harder. That's how I know he's warning me. He's telling me to tone it down.
Buzzkill.
"Logan told me you were a sweetheart but I had no idea he was bringing us such an angel." Lily chuckles, waving me over to the grey couch places directly across from the roaring fire.
I follow behind her, peering up to smirk at Logan from his mother's words. I find his jaw set hard and eyes slightly narrowed.
"Sweetheart." I mouth up to him, not bothering to hide my smile.
"Don't." He mouths backs to me, pinching me where his hand still rests on the small of my back.
"How was your flight here, darling? I hope the snow didn't cause too much trouble for you."
Logan guides us over to the other couch pressed against a large window and takes my hand in his when we sit down, our bodies tightly pressed beside each other.
If I didn't know any better, I'd say this whole act is pretty freaking convincing.
"It was a little bumpy- we hit some turbulence over Wisconsin with the weather being so brutal but it wasn't too bad."
Logan rolls his eyes, draping his arm across the back of the couch and resting his hand on my arm. "I told her not to bother flying out if the weather was so shitty but does she fucking listen? Of course not."
"And I told you that I wasn't going to cancel on meeting your family." I look at him pointedly before returning my gaze to his Mom.
Gabi sits down next to their Mother and chuckles. "It looks like you've finally met your match, Lo. How does it feel never winning arguments anymore?"
"God, Nova, when he was a little boy and got into any kind of screaming match with his brother or Dad, the whole house would shake! I've never seen such a little thing be so dramatic."
"Logan and 'little' in the same sentence?" I joke, poking my elbow into his side gently. "I just assumed that he was born over 6 foot with biceps bigger than my head."
Lily waves me off with a laugh and reaches out for a book sat on the coffee table. "Well, you're not too far off. He was almost 11 1/2 pounds when he was born, I had never seen a baby's head so big."
"Jesus." Gabi winces. "Why the hell did you have more kids after that?"
She ignores her daughter's question and flips open the bulky book on her lap. The first page is filled with photographs from what must be the day Logan was born.
"Mom." Logan groans, rubbing his temples. "I thought I told you not to bombard Nova with baby pictures. Seriously, put them away."
On instinct, I pat his knee and keep my hand resting there. "Stop being such a buzzkill. If your Mom wants to show me you as a chubby little baby then I want to see you as a chubby little baby. End of story."
"Thank you, sweetheart. I'm glad my son has finally found somebody that can put him in his place." Lily grins at me with a wink and passes over the large photo album.
"By that I think she means pisses me the fuck off." Logan whispers down to me, his lips pressed against the back of my head so nobody else hears.
I smirk at his words and let out a giggle at the first picture. "Look at you all dressed in white! I never thought I'd see the day you weren't wearing all black."
"Oh, that's a good photograph!" His mom gushes. "It was when we got him baptised in the Catholic church by our old house. His Grandmother, my ex mother-in-law, is a devote catholic so there was no avoiding it."
"My Grandma is the exact same way. She nearly had a fit when my Mom refused to get me and my siblings Christened."
"Oh God, don't tell Nonna you aren't baptised. She'll start spouting some holy water at you the second you enter her house." Gabi warns, adding creamer to her coffee.
That seems to remind Logan that there are drinks here so he quickly leans forward and starts to pour milk, a dash of creamer and 2 sugars into a mug. I watch with a raised brow as he gives it a brief stir before handing it over to me.
"Just how you like it. Loaded with sugar."
I gratefully accept the warm drink, desperate to shake off the cold from outside. "You remembered?"
"Of course." He admits with a tight nod, sipping his own coffee. It's black, as usual.
"So tell me," Lily interrupts our short moment with a slap of her hands on her knees. "We are dying to know how you two met. Logan has been very tight lipped about the details."
"Which only makes us more curious." Gabi points out, tipping her chin at her brother.
Uh oh. Here we go. It's lying our pants off time.
"You take this one, blondie. You always tell it better than I do."
That freaking jerk! I cannot believe he's dumped me with the story.
"Well, my best friend Cece has a brother on the team-"
"Wait a second." Gabi holds her hand up and leans further out of her seat in excitement. "You're friends with Cecilia Hastings? No freaking way!"
"They're roommates. Met at college." Logan tells them, lying smoothly about Cece still being my roommate.
My life would probably be a whole lot simpler if she was...
"Yeah we bunked together our freshman year at NYU." I add, happy to be telling the truth for a change. "Anyways, she practically forced me out of the apartment to watch one of their home games and then dragged me to the bar nearby to celebrate their big win."
"And I'm sure you can imagine how fucking excited Greyson was to introduce me to his sister's best friend. I mean, he's been trying to set me up with all kinds of girls for years."
I allow myself to relax into Logan's arms and rub his knee softly as I continue. "And it's a good thing he did introduce us because, otherwise, I would have assumed you were a self-obsessed, entitled, jerk."
Despite us now being on, mostly, good terms after our argument 2 weeks ago, I justvcan't resist getting a small jab in there. It's the least he deserves for putting me through the torture of lying to such nice people.
"And I would have thought you were a stuck up princess who's incapable of having any fun." Logan jabs back, stroking my arm with his index finger. "I guess we both got proven wrong."
"Mostly, anyway. I'm still not fully convinced." I smile as his Mom and sister chuckle at our interaction.
Lily sighs happily, clasping her hands together. "Logan asked me not to fuss to much but, honestly, I've just got to say that you two are a perfect match. I have never seen my baby boy so at ease with another person before."
My heart skips a beat. Maybe even two.
"Really, Nova, you should give yourself some props. You've really dragged this one out of his hermit shell."
"Gabrielle." Logan warns her, his hand tensing around my arm.
She holds her hands up in defence. "What? I'm not saying anything bad, or untrue! You've not been this open about your love life since Ashton and we have Nova to thank for that."
Ashton. A name I've never once heard pass through Logan's lips. A name I've never even heard mentioned in his presence before.
And I can see why given the way he's immediately built his walls back up, 100 feet higher than before.
I look up at his face to find a locked jaw, his teeth probably grinding together while Lily urges Gabi to stop speaking. His hazel eyes are set in a hard stare. Not quite a scowl but they're certainly not shining with mischief like they were earlier.
Note to self: never bring up this Ashton girl...
"Anyways," Lily coughs, drawing the awkward silence to a close. "You mentioned you're studying at NYU? What are you taking?"
"Oh, I'm studying Nursing. I'm in my Sophomore year so only two more after this one and-"
"Good morning, family." A man sings brightly as he waltzes into the room.
It doesn't take me long to notice that he's wearing nothing but a half undone bath robe and checkered boxer shorts.
And sweet baby Jesus, he looks like a mirror reflection of Logan.
They share the same eyes- from the almond shape to the light hazel, almost green, colour. They even have the same defined cheekbones and clear cut jawline.
"Alexander Romano! What the hell do you think you're wearing? We have a guest over for Christ sake!"
The man, Alexander, blinks slowly at his Mom and opens his arms up to bring her in for a hug. A hug which she refuses.
"Oh, come on, Mama. We're all family here." He teases her, his eyes sweeping across the room before they land on me. "Except for you, Blondie. You're new."
Logan's hand tightens even further, almost to a bruising level. I can practically feel the rage rolling off of him just from his brother's words.
"It's Nova." I correct him, hoping to put the furious man by my side at ease. "And I'm assuming you're the mysterious younger brother?"
He smiles warmly and holds a hand out for me to shake. "Alex. It's nice to finally meet the beautiful woman my brother has been hiding from us all."
"Take it down a few notches, fucker." Logan's voice is strained, almost as if he's having to resist screaming the whole house down.
"It's only because he's scared you'll prefer me. Especially since I inherited all of the good looking genes." Alex winks, mischief gleaming in his eyes.
"Hey." Gabi whines, kicking her brother in the shin. "Most people would argue that I'm the best looking in this family."
Lily hums thoughtfully. "I always thought your cousin Antonio was very handsome. He's got your Nonno's bright blue eyes."
"Mama, you're supposed to be on our side."
"Sorry, my love. I call them how I see them." She shrugs, handing Alex a mug filled to the brim with coffee.
The younger Romano siblings take that as their queue to start bickering, with their poor mom literally stuck in the middle of their cross fire.
I listen as Gabi makes fun of the dark circles under Alex's eyes and he replies with an equally snarky comment which earns him a scold from Lily.
The dynamic sort of reminds me of my own family. You know, the bickering siblings and the Mom caught in the middle.
I guess the only difference is that Arizona and I don't bicker. She throws gut wrenching insult after insult and I try my best to avoid the dull ache her words often leave behind.
Meanwhile, my Mom isn't really caught in the middle. She picked her side long ago. It's just a shame that it's not mine.
"Hey." Logan whispers down to me, his voice low and soft as it grazes past my ears.
I peak up at him and smile softly, now oddly comfortable sitting here in his embrace. Huh. Who would have thought?
"I'm sorry about them." He nods his head towards the other couch. "It's nearly over, I swear."
My shoulders lift in a shrug. "Don't be sorry. I don't mind. In fact, I actually like it here."
"Well now you must be losing your fucking mind. Nobody likes this."
"This is what real families are like, that's nothing to be sorry about, Logan." I tell him honestly and revel in the way his plush lips tip up ever-so-slightly and his hand strokes my arm, up and down, once over.
My hairs stand on end from the brief movement- like I've been electrocuted. And given the way his intense gaze is making me feel, I'm 99% sure that that's exactly what's happened.
"You fit in perfectly." He admits so softly, instantly causing a zoo of butterflies to flutter away in my stomach. "You're doing a fucking amazing job. Very convincing, girlfriend."
I can't help but track the way his tongue smooths over his top lip, wetting it. "I could say the same for you, boyfriend."
"Oh! Nova!" Alex shouts at me from the other couch, his almost deafening volume an extreme contrast to the gentle tone Logan was using before.
Logan adjusts his hold on my upper arm, now resting his hand on the small of my waist. "Use your inside voice, asshole."
"Sorry." He winces awkwardly. "I was just wondering who's room you'd rather crash in. Mine, or Lo's? Personally, I'd vote mine. It's way nicer and way less depressing."
Logan grumbles a couple of not-so-tasteful comments under his breath but I just giggle at Alex with a shake of my head. "And as tempting as that offer is, I vote neither."
Alex's face falls in confusion as I elaborate. "As much as I'd love to stay, my Mom is expecting me back in New York for Christmas Eve. She'd lose her mind if I didn't attend her annual big dinner with the entire neighbourhood."
My Mom claims that the dinner is a way to bring our community together- she's always ranting on and on about how Brooklyn could do with being more like her hometown in the deep south of Alabama.
But we all know better. Even Arizona is clued on to what her real motives are.
She's desperate to show our neighbours that despite all of our problems- my Dad's ill health, my sister's bitchiness, my little brother's tendency to act out- we're still that perfect, cereal-box family.
It's an image my Mom is hellbent on maintaining.
"Well, I hate to be the one to tell you this but... I don't think you have much choice."
My eyes widen. "I- erm. Why's that?"
Alex nods his head over to the big windows on the wall behind my head. "We're practically snowed in. There's no way any flights are going out anytime soon."
My stomach drops to the pits of my stomach as I twist around and stare at the window, astonished and dismayed.
There's no other way to describe the weather than a God dang blizzard- a storm of snowflakes and gusts of wind that look chilling, even from my seat inside.
And there's no other way to describe our situation than completely, and utterly, screwed.
"Fuckkkk." Logan groans under his breath, glaring at the snowy landscape wide eyed.
"I, uhm, how do I check to see if my flight is still scheduled? I would really hate to let my Mom down..." I can't help but sound shy as I speak, afraid that I might come across as too desperate to leave.
I am. But I can't let Logan's family know that.
"I'll start looking now." Logan pats the hand I have resting on his knee and immediately pulls his phone out, ready to search my airline for any flights back to New York.
It's in that moment that I realise, he's just as desperate for me to leave as I am. And I hate that.
"I know I would be heartbroken if I couldn't see my babies on Christmas so we'll try our best to get you back home, my love." Lily takes my hand and gives it a tight squeeze.
"Thank you for understanding." I sigh in relief that Logan was blessed with a empathetic Mother. We're not all that lucky. "I would love to spend more time with you all, it's just that my Mom has bought all of the food and-"
Lily instantly waves me off. "Don't worry about it, darling. I completely understand. Besides, we'll have plenty of time and opportunities to spend together in the near future."
'Plenty of time'.
Little does she know, Logan will be telling her all about our 'breakup' in just a few weeks from now.
"Cancelled."
I whip my head to the side to face a grim looking Logan. His lips are pushed down into a frown, his eyes a little frantic as they flick across his phone-screen.
"They're all cancelled." He repeats. "Every single flight out from Seattle-Tacoma is cancelled."
"King county?" Alex asks.
Logan shakes his head. "None."
"Tri-cities?" Gabi checks with concern.
"Nothing."
"What about-"
"They're all cancelled. Every flight out of Seattle, going East, is cancelled."
Cancelled. They're all cancelled.
And I am stuck here.
"That's awful, darling. I'm so sorry. I'm sure your Mom will be disappointed." Lily sighs. "But on a completely selfish level, I'm glad to have you with us."
Alex chuckles at his Mom. "And that brings me back to my original question; who's room will it be, Blondie? Logan's or mine?"
"I-"
"Mine." Logan answers for me, readjusting his grip around my shoulders.
"She'll stay in my room."
|✩✩✩|
I MADE IT!!! I FINALLY REACHED MY WRITING GOAL FOR THE MONTH
AT THE VERY LAST SECOND THIS CHAPTER MEANS THAT I POSTED 3 TIMES IN AUGUST !!!
IM SO HAPPY RN AH IT WAS A SPRINT TO THE FINISH LINE LET ME TELL YOU
but i'll be back to add to this and edit after i meet my deadline lollll BRB I LOVE YALL
*queue elevator music*
Andddd we're back! It is now September 1st and i'm wishing you all a very happy start of Autumn/fall🍂
It's all too well and scarf season baby!!🧣
Thank you all so much for joining me over here, it's always so great to have you! Especially since you guys have been so patient with this chapter❤️
I don't know why but I just really struggled with this one- hell, i even wrote about 6000 words and decided i hated it so started over!
That leads me to the whopping total of 9700 words this chapter! That might be my longest EVER. I hope thats okay??
Please let me know your thoughts- comments really boost this stories ratings and i ADORE hearing from you guys!
🗣️IN OTHER NEWS🗣️
I am here to OFFICIALLY announce a rebrand!
This story will now, and forever, be called 'Misconduct'. Just like the Hockey term, just like the antics!
I LOVE IT AND I HOPE YOU GUYS DO TOO BCS I THOUGHT ABOUT IT A LOT OKAY
along with a new name- we have a BEAUTIFUL new cover i am seriously obsessed with, designed by yours truly AND a new synopsis with a new sneak peak!!
AND brand new aesthetics & seriously thought out playlist for Logan and Nova.
Please go check all these things out, it kind of took me weeks and weeks to plan/make so...
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I love you all so much. Thank you for your continued support.
In fear of making this authors note WAY too long- i'll leave a life update in the comments if anyone is interested? Please leave yours too❤️
Stay safe my angels.
All my love,
Ellie