A/n: warning this chapter might be a trigger.
I wake up for the second time with my face pressed against Harry's back. My arms wrapped securely around his torso. His hands covering my own. My lips tilt up at our sleeping arrangement.
Harry is the little spoon.
I giggle and slowly remove my hands from his. I lay there a second reflecting on last night. The devil spider. Harry asking me to move in with him. Me realizing I love him. I squeeze my eyes shut before getting out of bed, and going to my bathroom looking around. I look around the bathroom double checking for any spiders before I get ready. I shower as quickly as possible and blow dry my hair. Then finish with doing my make-up for the day. I wrap the towel tightly around me before heading back out to my closet. Harry is still sound asleep making me smile slightly. I quickly pick out a two piece outfit and some heels. When I finish dressing, I admire myself in the mirror. I look beautiful. It's hard to believe how much I have changed.
I sigh before turning my bathroom light off and walking back to the bedroom.
"Damn you look gorgeous." Harry's raspy voice makes me jump before I turn around smiling.
"While thank you." I reply before putting in my earrings.
"Where are you going today?" Harry asks rubbing his eyes and sitting up. He is so adorable.
"First, I have to pick up Rose and then I have lunch with my dad." I explain looking at him through my mirror.
"I didn't know you were going to lunch with your dad." He furrows his eyebrows.
"We do this every month since Rose was born so he can see her. I love P, but she can be a real bitch." I shake my head at my sister and walk over to the bed sitting down. Harry wraps his arm around my waist pulling me inbetween my legs. I rest my head against his shoulder enjoying his warmth and bare chest.
"It's going to take a while to get use to your short hair." He chuckles kissing my head.
"Same dude." Harry laughs lightly pulling me closer to him.
"I'm really enjoying this skirt. It's really sexy." Harry purrs like a cat in my ear causing me to squirm aout of his grip laughing. He grips my hip making me laugh harder.
"Are you ticklish?" Harry laughs. He lays me down, straddling me, holding me down, and tickling my exposed midriff. I grip his shoulders trying to push him off me.
"Harry! Stop!" I yell throwing my head back in laughter. Harry laughs just as hard as me as he coutinues his assault. I thrash around finally pushing him off of him. I jump off the bed running as fast as I can in a tight shirt and heels. Harry chases after me our laughter filling the apartment. He catches me when we reach the kitchen. His strong arms wrapping around me lifting me in the air spinning me around pinching my butt.
Our laughs mix together as he sits me down on the counter top. I smile resting my hand on the back of his neck and bring his lips to mine.
I pull back giggling, "You have red lipstick on you now. Red is your color" I giggle, Harry makes kissing noises fluttering his eyes. He flips his hair with his hand dramatically as he walks toward the fridge getting food.
-
Harry puts a plate of food in front of me, my mouth watering. I immediately start eating. Harry chuckles as he starts eating. I debate if I should ask him about yesterday. If I want answers I will have to ask sometime.
"So...um Harry" I clear my throat setting my fork down. "Last night, you said you would explain about yesterday." He sighs putting his fork down.
"Okay. Ask me what you want and I will answer." He rubs his face stressfully.
"Like anything?" I widen my eyes in surprise.
"Anything. You don't hide things about your past or present why should I? You don't deserve to be in the dark." Harry sighs. I can't help but feel slightly guilty that I have told Harry about all my past struggles. It doesn't really affect me today, but it does at the same time.
"You aren't hiding anything right?" Harry furrows his eyebrows at my hesitant.
"Well... I mean- I'm not really. I just went through a lot of stuff in high school. Like emotionally, you know?" I explain taking another bite of food.
"What do you mean emotionally?" I put my head in my hands. How can I expect Harry to talk about his past when I can't even talk about my own?
"I just- I went through some stuff. Can I ask you questions now?" I mumble slightly a bit of edge in my voice.
"Why are you getting defensive? How bad could it be?" Harry says slightly upset.
"What happened?" He pushes. I grit my teeth and squeeze my eyes shut.
"I don't want to talk about it." I say back clenching my fist.
"How the fuck do you expect me to be open with you and you can't even be open with me!?" Harry says upset and angry.
"I'm sorry! Okay! I don't like talking about! I want to forget about it! I'm supposed to be strong and I can't be when I talk about all that shit!" I yell standing up. I start walking toward the kitchen biting my lip. I put my hand on my forehead trying not to cry.
"Sweetheart, I'm your bear, and I'm always here for you. I dont care if I see you weak. Seeing you weak just shows me how fucking strong you are." Harry puts his hands on either side of my face makes me look up at him. I sigh nodding. I just five right in and get it over.
"When I was 15 some kids start picking on me. They called stupid stuff like slut, fat, ugly, stuff like that. I don't know why they called me a slut, I didn't even have my first boyfriend til college."I keep my head down staring at his chest so I don't have to look at him.
"Anyway, when you hear people call you fat over and over and over again for nearly 3 years, you just start believing it. I started just hating myself and everything that was me." Harry puts his hand on my back rubbing my back. I take a deep breath before coutinuing.
"I started not eating, and if I did eat I went and threw it up because I just felt so guilty and ugly. I felt so worthless and my parents were going through so much on top of that so nobody even noticed I was completely spiraling." Silent tears start falling down my cheeks. They barely fall from my eyes before Harry wipes them away.
"My sister was to busy with her boyfriend and hating my dad to even care and Eric hadn't noticed that I wasn't eating. I cried myself to sleep every night and nobody cared. Nobody even noticed. Eric mentioned I had lost weight, but didn't push it because he knew I wasn't a fan of talking about my weight." My hand grips on to Harry's hip for support.
"They would push me into lockers or knock all my stuff out of my hands. It was just embarrassing. Eric protected me as much as he could, but he couldn't be with me all the time. I think part of the reason nobody liked me was because I just was extrodinary. I don't mean to sound self centered but, I excelled at everything I did. I had a 4.0 gpa and I was class president and I did everything involving music I could. I was never mean to anyone either so I don't know what I did?" My voice cracks making me scrunch my eyes.
"Well, I was practicing in one of the band rooms for a huge piano solo thing I had coming up a-and a couple of jocks came in. They had me pressed up against the wall and t-they were taking my clothes off. I tried to fight them off but I wasn't strong enough. I just remember crying and screaming for help, but they covered my mouth so no one would hear. I'm so lucky I had asked Eric to come help me practice because before anything happened Eric came in and just beat the shit out of them. That's why Eric is so protective of me." I break down. All emotions I have buried and not thought about in years surfacing. I wrap my around Harry pulling him closer to me.
"Shh it's okay baby. You're safe." He kisses the top of my head.
"Did they...touch you?" Harry asks. I skake my head no. I calm myself down a bit before I finished the story.
"That day I had enough. I was just...done. I had planned on ending it that day. I was harming myself and Eric walked in. He broke down. I have never seen him more hurt then in that moment. He just hugged me and...cried for hours. He clung on to me like he was afraid I was going to disappear right in front of him. I never even realized someone cared about me so much you know? Eric cleaned me up then just gave me a lot of tuff love. He told me that I was beautiful like every two minutes and he actually made me believe it." I look up at Harry for the first time. "Eric saved my life. He made me happy and whenever I needed someone he was there. Without him, I strongly believe I wouldn't be alive." I wipe under my eyes shaking my head trying to ignore the thoughts I have buried for so long.
"I'm sorry." Harry whispers lightly touching my cheek. I close my eyes shaking my head again.
"It's okay. You know even if I could change it. I probably wouldn't because even with all of that shit, I turned out pretty fucking awesome. I took charge of my life and told those asshole to leave me the fuck alone and it made me confident. It made me strong and it made me the powerful women I am today." I say straightening up a bit. Harry slightly smiles kissing my forehead.
"My strong girl." He mumbled against my forehead. I nod sighing.
"Your turn now that you made me cry, asshole" I slightly chuckle. Harry cracks a smile. He picks me up sitting me on the counter looking up at me.
"What do you want to know?" Harry asks resting his hand on my lower back.
"Everything"
A/n :,( that was sad. I love you lily. Time to find out about Harry next ohhh :(: vote please. I just fell more in love with Eric though.