SCANNING the surroundings, Jetty grabs Letty towards the benches and in every gazebo, however, no raven-haired man came to view. Although she wanted to melt like a slime for expecting someone who is not sure of going back, she has her Father's determination and so she's not giving up, at least, not yet.
If Jetty is too eager, Letty feels the same way as her twin sister. Mr. Carl Lumaria deserves to have his notebook back. "Letty?"
"Hmmm?" she hummed, eyeing every possible corner of the park.
"What if naghahanap lang pala tayo sa wala? What if he's not coming back at all?" asked Jetty while her head is bowed, obviously too tired of hoping.
"We can find any possible ways. I know what to do if ever na hindi na siya bumalik dito," the other responded.
Jetty sighed helplessly. "But would he take it back? Sabi niya kasi, he's letting go of it na for real as a way of setting Ms. Venus free."
Letty made a face as she snorted. "I don't know. Hindi ko nga alam kung bakit we're too concerned with this eh hindi naman natin kilala iyong tao."
"Because we care? Sa kaniya pa rin naman ito and if he really wanted to let go of this, he should burn it or bury it. I don't care but we are enough as a witness of his undying love to his best friend," Jetty explains.
"Sa bagay, may point ka nga." Letty then scanned again her surroundings.
Jetty sighed. "Baka kasi if makita ito ng iba, pagtatawanan lang siya knowing how social media people works. They will use it as a clout at baka ipagkakalat pa ang laman ng diary na ito."
Letty eventually nods. "Right, right. Let's just go and find him."
"If we ever find him," Jetty said, "Maghiwa-hiwalay tayo."
"Okay. Doon ako." Letty pointed at the other side.
Jetty then stared into her twin sister's eyes. "Meet me here in 20 minutes. Naiintindihan mo ba ako? Kapag wala pa ako rito after 20 minutes, don't go anywhere to look for me. Call me instead. Babalik ako. Babalikan kita rito kahit mahuli pa ako ng dating."
Letty, annoyed, she deadpanned. "As far as I know, ako ang Ate rito."
"Argh! Promise me, Letty!" Jetty demanded, brows quirking.
"Promiiiiseeee..." Letty then started walking away. She runs towards the other side of the park.
Jetty on the other hand just watches her until she lost sight of her. That's when she started moving. She took her time looking at every nook and cranny of her assigned place but no raven-haired man appeared in front of her. Not even a silhouette nor any trace of Mr. Carl Lumaria's existence there. She wondered if he was really serious about his soul-searching.
What if he's not coming back again? It's his favorite place after all and if he's not yet coming, she is certain that the guy is really serious about setting free of Ms. Venus completely. She's not aware of the story behind that and what happened during the closed curtains since the diary is her only blueprint but from what is written there, she's sure that it's not that good to talk about.
"Nasaan ka na, Sir? Wala ka na ba talagang balak na balikan ang diary mo?" Frustrated, she stomped her feet on the cobblestone. "You're really a coward. Hindi mo na nga inilaban ang taong mahal mo, iniwan mo pa ang privacy mo sa gitna ng maraming tao."
She run out of time so she scurried back to their meeting place with her twin sister. She already saw her there, waiting patiently for her. By the look on her face, she could tell that she also failed to look for him.
"Olats, Jettisha." Letty chucks, rocking herself.
"Same here." Jetty shakes her head in defeat. "So? Paano na iyan?"
"Uuwi na tayo. The very observant Daddy Erick is suspecting that something is up. Patay tayo kapag nalaman niyang nakikialam tayo sa privacy ng iba," Letty informed.
She sighed. "I'll just keep it na lang. I'll make sure na no one can read it again. Itatago ko ng mabuti."
"Sealed it for all I care," Letty added. She is about to speak too when her phone suddenly chimes. "Uy, sino iyan? Jowa mo? Lagot ka kay Daddy Ririk."
Jetty hissed at her. "Huwag ka ngang praning. Ta-tatlo na nga lang ang contacts ko, inaasar mo pa ako."
"Oh... you still have Mom's?" Letty smiled longingly. "Same pala tayo."
Jetty didn't respond to that as she tap the receiving button. "Dad? Yes po. I'm with her. We're on our way na po. Labas-labas ka rin kasi minsan. So? Date tayong tatlo? Pleaseeeeee... Yieee, kaya kita love eh. Bye po. I love you daw po dabi ni Lettisha—"
"I. DID. NOT. SAY. THAT!" Letty growled as she grabbed the phone from her twin. She can hear their Father's laugh from the other line.
"Love youuuuu, Daddy!" Jetty chirped happily.
"Love you, Dad—argh! Kainis!" she grunted when she accidentally mimicked Jetty.
Frankly, Letty is not the sweetest type and she tends to bottle up her feelings. She's a composed type of person. What they see is only what she allowed them to see. She is territorial in her own space and while Jetty is the same as her, Jetty tends to be carefree when she's around with her family but she is not like her twin sister.
"Uyyyyy, sinabi niya. Dad, sinabi niyaaaa..." Jetty giggles childishly and now, their Dad is a laughing shack from the other line.
It made her smile because it's been a long while since she have heard him laugh like that. Her heart swells. As much as she misses their Mom, she also misses their Dad's genuine laugh. He's been so sad all this time and if her cheesiness will make him laugh like that then so be it.
"I love you, Dad. So much. Sorry for not being vocal about it but I do."
Maybe taken aback, their Dad had stopped laughing and was quiet for a second. She had mistaken him for hanging up had she not heard his ragged breathing there. "Yeah, same. Mahal na mahal ko kayo. Don't feel sorry for it. Alam ko naman iyon."
If there is one thing that Mr. Carl Lumaria taught her, it is to never box your feelings in your safe. She could've said how much she loves her Mom so much but then, she's too late for that. She would never hear her even if she would shout it to the world.
How she admired Jetty for being so vocal about what she felt and about how clingy she is to them. No, Letty couldn't do that herself. She is prideful and she has this mentality that 'I love you' and being 'clingy' is all but cheesiness so she keeps her cool instead.
It's too late for her to realize such things that it wouldn't hurt to open the bottle. It wouldn't hurt to say I love you to the one you cherished about. It wouldn't hurt to be vocal about how you adore someone.
Being clingy, being soft, and saying such things to your parents and sibling cost you nothing. She realizes that life is too short and she has no idea about the future so she must yield to it; she needed to open her heart and arms for them.
She is afraid that she would be too late again. She knows that she is not the sweetest daughter and sister but when she does, she means every fiber of her being. It still cringes her while she mustered all the courage she has to say to their Dad but it is her Daddy Erick who loves her in her good and bad shape and it is her Father who has protected her in all ways possible and it is her Father who scolded her when she does something wrong and is also the same person who would die for her.
"Lettisha, go home with your sister. I have a surprise song for the both of you." She heard him loud and clear but she wanted to tear up. She just gathered the urge against her aching throat.
Maybe she could cry later in her room.
"Y-Yes. Uuwi na po kami," she responded and by that, the call cuts off.
Letty wanted to thank Mr. Carl Lumaria for the gem that she acquired from his story. She has learned that sometimes, it is okay to say your heart. Rejections are there but never be afraid of it. It's also a reminder for everyone.
Now, she fully understands their Father's point of view about rejection. Their Dad's first-ever song has been rejected by how many recording companies. She really thought the demo is great, the song is great and everything but still, no one wanted to gamble with him. She felt bad about it but their Father told them that it was okay.
Although he said it, she and her twin will hear him cry in silence in the middle of the night and then when the sun came out, he was okay again. He never stops sailing and that great determination inspires both his children to never give up on their dreams too.
Their Dad might be quiet about it but his deeds speak volumes. He is broken many times by tons of rejections but he still manages to pick up his pieces to be broken again despite the murky waters. Their Dad is never been afraid to walk in the scorching pavement.
Until he found one – that one label that invested in him and risk it all. To make the story short, their wonderful Dad is now a bigshot singer, and songwriter and is now starting producing songs too. She's so proud of him.
This taught her that rejection is okay and it is always a part of growing to be better. Rejection isn't just a rejection but sometimes it is a redirection towards the right path and the right love that is really meant for you.
Also, Mr. Carl Lumaria taught Letty that courage is something that is too expensive since not all can have it. Not because they couldn't afford the priceless attribute but because they are ruled by their weakest waves.
In a state called love, strength, and bravery are sometimes not for the faint hearts but still, love will find a way like how water always found its own pathway... if only courage is enough fuel towards your heart.
Honestly, she have learned so much just from a single diary that she called a storm and all she could wish is that wherever Mr. Carl Lumaria was right now, she wished him all the best in life and she hope that someday, he will find his own happiness. All that she hopes is that Mr. Lumaria will have the courage to love again after his healing phase.
"... Letty? Uy, Lettisha Angela!" Jetty called. She doesn't know how long she has spaced out but Jetty seems worried about her. It's all written in her expressive eyes.
She smiled at her. "Jettisha, sorry for not being vocal about it but I love you. Mahal na mahal ko kayo ni Dad."
Jetty who was worried earlier, stared at Letty's misty eyes. A warmth creeps into her heart as she reached for her twin sister's hand. Letty smiled at her as she returned the favor. Hand-in-hand, they both walked out from the Abaga Park, contented and loved as they both hummed their Father's favorite song.
"Jetty?" Letty called after a moment of silence.
The other turned to her. "Hmmm?"
"Nabasa mo na ba ang nakasulat sa paper plane ni Sir Carl?" Letty asked, eyes are lingering.
As if on cue, Jetty jolted. She forgot about the paper plane completely when all along, it's been slipped into Mr. Carl Lumaria's diary. "Weh? May nakasulat doon? Paano mo nalaman?"
Letty shrugged before she fished out something familiar from her pocket. "Nakita ko ito while I was searching for him kanina. It looks familiar so I checked it and I was right. The same penmanship and the same paper. I know it's his."
"I wished on a paper plane that I could get over you sooner. I love you, my very own Olympian goddess."
Jetty blinked. "So, he's not playing that day? He's actually flying them intentionally?"
"Sort of. It's like he's wishing on a paper plane. Parang imposible, right? Pero kung doon siya nakahanap ng refuge on flying his wishes into the air sa pamamagitan ng paper planes, we couldn't blame him. We also kind of... you know, did the same?" Letty smiled a little.
"Gaya ng ginagawa natin if we're mad? Yeah, bakit hindi ko iyon naisip agad? We're writing our rants on a paper boat then hahayaang lumayag ito sa ilog..." Jetty pointed out.
"It's an art of letting go of our painful thoughts just like Sir Carl. Hindi lang naman diary niya ang binitawan niya that day but also wishes of luck para sa babaeng mahal niya." Letty sighs. "He must have really loved her. Kahit kasi sobrang nasaktan siya, wala pa rin siyang ibang gusto kung hindi ay para lang sa kasiyahan ni Ms. Venus."
Jetty chewed her lip as she carefully unfolded the paper plane that have hit her face yesterday. It was crafted beautifully and her twin sister is right. There's a letter in it aside from incoherent doodles there. Unlike the other one, this paper plane has a long note. Upon reading it, they exchange worrisome faces and when Jetty's about to weep, Letty immediately shushed her, telling her that it's okay.
"To my goddess, I wish you all the best in life. I'm sorry that I have hurt you over and over. Sorry for the mixed signals. Sorry that I am a coward. I wished on a paper plane that you could forgive me. I wished on a paper plane that these wounds would heal quickly. I wished on a paper plane to take my pain away. I wished on a paper plane—please take me far away..."
THE END
To God be the glory!
Date Started: July 10, 2023
Date Ended: July 12, 2023