Tarak
The moment I enter the pet hospital, an emergency vet takes her from me. Rigel stays with me in the lobby. Every moment that I do not see her agitates me. How do I know she is not scared? Or not being cared for properly? I clench my fists; I need my Kayla and my Kayla needs me.
A veterinarian calls my name and I follow him into a small hospital room. I rush to Kayla's bedside. She is sleeping and looks small and pale in the hospital bed. Seeing her like this scares me. My eyes skitter over her throat and when I find that her throat bandages are gone, my hands hover near her.
"She was due for an appointment to assess her healing from her most recent operation. You will be pleased to know she is recovering well from that surgery, so we removed the bandages." says the vet and then he speaks to my next fear. "Her vocal cords are strained from the experience, but again, since she has nearly healed, we anticipate no long-term damage. However, it will take a few days for her voice to sound normal."
I swish my tail in satisfaction, and I stroke Kayla's cheek. I yearn for her to wake up and speak to me with her voice.
Rigel rushes into the hospital room. This bird often irritates me, but right now, I am relieved that he is here, although I will never tell him that.
The vet pulls back the sheet covering Kayla's legs. So many butterfly bandages and I cannot help myself; I bellow. Rigel's hand is on my shoulder.
"It's not as bad as it looks," continues the vet. "Most of the wounds on her leg were superficial, except for one on her foot that required a few stitches. The most challenging aspect is that scourge fangs can inject proteins that cause pain, which we have been using antibodies to remove," he says, tapping a long tube attached to her arm. "So, for her medical care..."
The vet explains what sounds like a very simple protocol, although my attention wanes because I am already modifying this protocol in my mind; first, I will need to check and recheck the wounds in her legs, next, I will need to offer her berries every hour and most important of all, I will cuddle with her, constantly.
"We do have a specific medical concern for your pet," says the vet, which draws my attention back to him. "We run models predictive of outcomes and based on her reported experiences. we believe she is at risk of prolonged trauma after the event."
"What should I do?" I say, clenching my fists.
"Give her lots of supportive care to mitigate any of these risks. If you have any routines, do that, and that might make her feel safe. I also suggest a follow-up later with your behaviorist."
This veterinarian is wise, recommending that I do routines to make her feel safe. So, my modified care plan should work well, except... Will my boss cooperate with all the time off I might need? Probably not, which means that I will need the help of others.
I look at Rigel. "My pet will need care, probably every hour of the day, so..."
"You've been given time off to tend to her," says Rigel.
"But my boss said–"
"Don't worry about that now," says Rigel.
Both Rigel and the veterinarian are right. Kayla is the most important. As soon as the vet removes her infusion tube, I pull her into my arms and take her home.
***
I initiate her special protocol, starting with a bath the moment I get her home. She's still unresponsive, but it soothes me to hold her in my arms with her head on my chest as we float in warm water.
It's when I am floating on my back with her that her brow furrows and it sounds like her heart stutters, skipping beats.
"Tarak?"
"Yes, Kayla?"
"Tarak! I need you."
I am staring straight at her, but it is as if she does not see me. Her eyes are wild, darting in every direction.
I kiss the top of her head, and I hug her tighter. "I'm with you, Kayla, I'm holding you."
Eventually, her eyes close, and she falls asleep in my arms.
A few hours later, when we are in bed, she reawakens, and we restart the entire process. Her heart races. She seems confused and disoriented and calls to me as if I'm not even in the room with her. I clench her hand, and after lots of reassurance, she gets quiet and falls asleep again.
Every few hours the entire process repeats. She reawakens, acting lost and confused. I do what I can to soothe her. I hold her. Call her name. Even though I know what to expect, why does my heart break each time it happens?
***
After two solar days, she opens her eyes in the pool, but this time she stays silent.
I tilt her so that she can see my face. "Kayla?"
She smiles at me. Finally, my star shines. I carry her from the pool and feed her a few berries. She doesn't eat much, but the fact that she gazes trustingly at me the entire time calms me.
My Kayla is returning. When she refuses any more berries, even though it is midday, I wrap her up in a blanket and hold her in my lap.
"Sorry... I'm so sorry, Tarak," she says, her voice raspy and strained.
"Do not be sorry, Kayla," I say, and kiss the top of her head, forehead, and cheek.
We are so close I see her pretty freckles. She surges forward and presses her lips into mine, boldly pushing her tongue inside my mouth. I can taste the lingering sweetness from the berries and the back of my throat tingles. She's all right and with time, we both will be.
When we break apart, she blurts, "No, I need you to know. I did something. Me getting hurt is all my fault."
I hug her tight. "You did nothing wrong. Rigel was neglectful and forgot to watch you, I was not smart enough to understand the alert from the wall unit and failed to find you, but thanks to the glowy butterflies–"
"No, I want you to know. It's my fault," she says, clapping and activating my wall unit.
I kiss her nose. "Mimicking. It's so cute how you do that."
"What?! I'm not mimicking. Watch," she says, grabbing my chin and turning my head to face the wall unit. "Computer, show the program trackers."
So many symbols fly across my wall unit. I do not understand any of them, but she tells me that these are programs to track the movement of bandages and sutures on Hydra.
"I even had the program send you alerts," she says, gazing at me. "Do you understand now?"
I look between her and the wall unit. "You found the glitch? This wall unit misbehaves sometimes."
"Glitch?"
"The wall unit does things by itself. Like it ordered berries by itself and now it sends me alerts, although we are lucky the wall unit did that. We might not have found you without the last one... I'm proud of you for figuring all of this out, Kayla."
She huffs. "Tarak, I made programs to track medical supplies, not the computer. That's why I wanted that operation so that there would be a way to track me."
"You did this?" I say, looking at the glyphs on the wall. "How are these symbols related to the alerts?"
She takes my keyboard, taps at the keyboard, and new symbols appear on the wall. She does this for several minutes and then...
"Roar," she says.
"You want me to..." I look at her and she taps my throat. I swallow and bellow at the wall.
"Thank you, Commander Tarak," says the wall. "Halazone will ship your delivery at once."
The wall unit never did this before. "You made the wall unit say that?"
"Yes, do you understand now? It's a simple program. We can select the input and the output, that's all. This time the input is your roar."
"So, you made the glitches?"
"I didn't consider them glitches, more like tools. Do you understand now how this was all my fault? I just... I want you to know."
"If anyone would have found out. Why did you do it, Kayla? You chose to put that device in your brain and... Loviatar could have killed you."
"Other humans were not safe, especially from Loviatar and someone had to try to protect them. How is Ava, Loviatar's human pet, by the way? Have you seen her?"
I nuzzle Kayla, but she keeps asking, so I ask the wall unit. "What is the status of the female human pet of Loviatar Lyth?"
"Registered to the name Ava," adds Kayla.
"Ava is currently being treated in the pet hospital," says the wall unit.
Her brow furrows. "I want to visit her and make sure she's okay."
Suddenly knowing how many things could have gone wrong intensifies my need to reassure myself that Kayla is not injured.
"Later," I say, nuzzling her, inhaling her scent.
Several minutes later, the wall unit chimes. "Your Halazone delivery is here," says the wall.
"What?" I ask, a bit confused.
"That's the output of my program," says Kayla excitedly. "So let the delivery robot enter."
I've been uneasy around those bots since they attacked Kayla, but this robot is well-behaved, and it holds out my favorite snack and a box of berries. I accept it but still warily watch the bot as it rolls away.
"Understand now?" asks Kayla.
"Why did it bring me stuff?"
"That's the output part, and it depends on what someone puts in the program. Do you get it now? For the output of the other programs, I just had it send alerts for tracked movement."
Holding the boxes delivered from the Zon is what makes it real for me and finally, I understand. These programs do real things in the world.
"Kayla, who did you send alerts to?"
She pulls up the names, displaying them on the wall. Some, like Rigel, I trust (even if he is annoying). When I see Sirius from the Pet Welfare Intelligence Agency, I worry.
"Why this scourge?" I ask.
"Sirius was not my first choice, but I had already sent messages to you and Rigel, and no one ever seemed to respond to my alerts, so I did it to maximize Ava's chance."
"If Hydra learns that pets were the source of the alerts..." I swallow, unable to say what I fear most. Humans could be deemed a threat to Hydra. My tail cracks against the floor. "Come on," I say, lifting Kayla into my arms.
I run down the hall and into Rigel's lobby. His office door is open, and I can see him and the back of a scourge. No time for delay. I burst into the room.
***
I grab a chair and sit facing Rigel.
The private is here, as are his colorful glowing pets that fly about the room. Kayla is delighted of course, as are they. One of the rahonis flies straight to her. She coos at the creature, and it curls in her lap.
Rigel clenches his jaw. "Tarak, you need to make an appointment and wait your turn."
"There is no time. This concerns Kayla," I say, certain that they will want to know anything that concerns my pet.
Rigel flutters his wings, but he listens.
"Kayla, show them what you made."
She tells the wall unit to display one of her tracking programs on the wall.
I tell them how these programs tracked medical supplies and sent alerts.
"Kayla did this?" asks Rigel.
"This is very impressive," says the other scourge pet owner, ruffling Kayla's hair. "Good pet."
"There is a problem, though. Kayla sent alerts to Sirius of the Pet Welfare Intelligence Agency. If they figure out Kayla was behind it–"
"All pet humans might be in danger," says Rigel.
"What are we going to do?" I ask. "They already visited me before, asking about stolen medical supplies."
All the rahonis, even the one in Kayla's lap, fly at the wall unit. The wall unit shuts off, plunging the entire room into darkness. The only light in the room is the rahonis, which all now glow red.
"Hold on," says Rigel, clapping his hands several times in a row, although the wall unit does not respond.
Several minutes later, the wall unit illuminates. Kayla's program is still on the wall, but as we watch, symbols disappear.
"Kayla, are you doing this?" asks Rigel.
"No, I think..." She laughs as the wall flickers on and off.
"Kayla, this is important, stop playing," I tell Kayla.
"I think the rahonis are doing this," she says.
"Rahonis can control wall units?" I ask.
"I'm sorry, I'll get them away from there," says the private, whistling. His rahoni pets are rather disobedient; only one flies to his shoulder, while the others stay affixed to the wall.
"No, it's fine... I think the rahonis have the right idea," says Kayla, laughing, although I don't see what she finds so funny. "Rigel and Tarak, did you delete any of the previous alerts?"
"Delete," Rigel and I ask at the same time.
"You don't... You never delete messages?" asks Kayla.
I make Kayla explain to me and she tells me something about making messages disappear and once again, Rigel and I shrug.
"This might be the perfect solution then," says Kayla, taking the keyboard. "Can I examine your old alerts, Rigel?"
Rigel nods and Kayla is fast, her fingers fluttering across the keyboard. Alerts flicker across the wall, and with another few taps, they disappear.
"Computer, show the alerts sent to Rigel from the tracking program."
Nothing appears on the wall.
Kayla is excited. "It works!"
"Why are you happy about a blank wall?" I ask.
"Oh, I think I get it. Is this like deleting the evidence?" asks the private.
Kayla confirms the other scourge's theory. As for me, between the rahonis, the glitches, and the fact that the wall unit now appears to be broken, my head hurts.
Rigel clears his throat. "Well, if the rahonis and Kayla think they have fixed it, we should trust them. Although, I think we all need to have a cover-up story in case anyone asks. And we have more to cover up than just the things that humans can do. The rahonis are very adept, too."
Usually, I wouldn't trust others, but for once, I trust Rigel and the private while we concoct our plan because we are working toward the same purpose: protecting the pets.
***
Worrying about Kayla all day frazzles my nerves. So, when I return home with Kayla, I do every routine to calm me, from baths to berries, and settle into bed early with her.
I turn off the wall unit. Except for the bright pixelated numbers reporting the time in the corner of my wall, the room is dark. Having so little light is good; it helps slow my thoughts.
"I'm glad we got to see the rahonis. I was worried about them," she says, nestled against my chest and under the blankets.
I am thankful for rahonis, after all, they did help save my pet, although I'm still puzzled as to why she felt drawn to them in the park. Those pets looked like butterflies, which I would have either ignored or hunted.
"What drew you to the rahonis? The first time in the park?"
She stays quiet, so I think she might have fallen asleep.
Except after a long while, she whispers. "Do you remember when you found me? On my ship?"
She had been half-starved and sickly looking when I first found her, and the memory makes me hug her so tight. I never want to see her in such a state again.
"Yes."
"I'm going to tell you about why I first went onto my ship because it's related to why I have this need to look at other life forms closer. The humans on Earth have spent years looking to the stars, dreaming about whether there might be others out there looking back at us, except... Even though we sent radio transmissions, we never got a reply. After a while, some humans on Earth gave up on anything but us being in the universe. With what seemed to be an infinite number of stars and planets, though, I was sure other life forms were in space, although I expected life forms like bacteria or an insect and that maybe I would be the first one from Earth to discover them. So, to finally see glowing creatures from another part of the galaxy brought back my memories of those dreams and... Since they sometimes glowed together, I thought they might be communicating with each other and maybe they were trying to communicate with me, too."
I can't help thinking how I was ready to ignore those rahonis as silly, because of their floppy wings and bright colors on their skin. Yet that's what drew her to them. "Why did you think they were communicating?"
"I didn't know, but... I hoped they were. Maybe it's because of an early encounter with insects that glow on my home planet, Earth, and the way they used their fluorescence to communicate and–"
"Why would you pay attention to insects, such small and insignificant creatures."
"Oh Tarak, that's just a bias," she says, patting my chest. "Maybe I was lucky to see them before I formed such prejudices. My world, Earth, is dying, and lots of the big animals are already gone, but when I was a kid, I was taken to see one of the living game preserves with plants and insects, a swamp."
"A swamp?" Now she has my attention because I haven't been in a swamp in decades, but my blood and my heart still throb at the thought of swimming in the murky waters.
"Yes. I went out in a boat near dusk with a group of other school kids from the city. As kids most of us hadn't seen any life forms besides humans, so everything I saw in the swamp was magical."
"Swamps are magical." Suddenly, I yearn to roam in a swamp. It's not just the hunts that I miss but being part of a pack. We had a way of communicating that just can't be replicated, even on the ship with squadrons. We would run in great hordes, letting our instincts guide us.
"Towering trees jutting out of the water pointed straight up to the heavens. Greeting us was this chorus of frogs, croaking all around us, but what was most interesting to me was these clouds of fireflies. To me, it looked like the fireflies were communicating with secret messages that only they understood because a firefly cloud would flash in synchrony, and then on the other side of the riverbank, another cloud of fireflies would flash the same pattern. So, I asked the guide what those fireflies might be saying..."
She goes silent. Her breathing is evening out, and her heart is slowing. I need the answer, though, so I gently shake her.
"What were those insects saying?"
"I was only a child, but I've looked into it and there is some truth to it... They were sending messages of love and..." She finds my hand in the darkness and squeezes it. "Some females use it to call and find a mate."
I am still amazed that she listened and paid attention to something small and insignificant, especially since a scourge might never have noticed them.
She pokes me. "What, you're not going to tell me how you would dominate them, or they are silly?" she teases.
"I... I..." I huff. I am a scourge. I conquer and dominate other alien species. So how can my lovely Kayla make me unable to speak? I don't want to risk losing her again without saying what is inside me. For her, I must try. "What's the name of those glowing green cloud insects on your planet?"
"A firefly?"
"Yes, they are not silly. I want to be a firefly."
She laughs. "Now I know you are teasing me. Why would you want to be a firefly?"
I nip at her earlobe and her neck, and she giggles. I whisper in her ear. "Because I would light the sky. Everyone will know. I love Kayla."
I would have thought she would complain since my arms were so tight around her, but she sighs and nestles against me, so I hug my little human tighter.