Nora couldn't remember the last time she didn't want to be in class, loving the way she was able to not worry about anything, being able to drown in reading and writing things down; essentially her happy place. For some reason today she didn't want to be there, standing in defence of the dark art as her professor kept talking.
"Did you hear, the seventh years are throwing a party?" Atticus whispers, purely annoyed. Nora looked away from her professor, not listening to either but pretended to act surprised. "On a Monday too; for what reason?" He scoffed, crossing his arms.
Being able to stand in the back while others stood in front of her, Nora had her side leaning on the wall, looking back at Atticus and shrugging her shoulders. "I don't see the problem." She whispered, her eyes softening.
"What— okay." Atticus stammered out, stopping the conversation.
"This is just a refresher for your N.E.W.T.s, we are going to do riddickulus with the boggart." Professor Cooper spoke, giving a small smile to the class. Nora felt her heart skip a beat, last time they had to do this, nothing showed for her, becoming a concern as to why she feared nothing.
Mostly because she feared everything and nothing at the same time. Thirteen year old Nora was scared of the world, anything that came in her way. It worried her to know she'll have to relive this fear, knowing in the last three years many things have changed.
Nora hated how this class was a mix of all four houses in her year, knowing this'll take a while, a class of 20 people, all having to witness people's fear.
"Alright, everyone line up, Slytherins up first." Professor Cooper said, waving her wand around. Hating herself for standing in the back, Nora pushed Atticus and Snape to stand in front of her, slowly walking for Cassie and Betty to be next, standing between betty and turning to the Gryffindors behind her.
"Don't be nervous, it'll probably be spiders." Her brother spoke, patting his hand on her shoulder. Nora cringed and squirmed, not praying it won't be spiders, side eyeing her brother. "Why would you say that! Now it's definitely going to be spiders." Nora whined, groaning out loud.
Atticus' fear was birds in the muggle world, reading about crows being together was called a murder, having he gets attacked by them in broad daylight. Snape's was almost funny to some people, failing his N.E.W.Ts, almost beginning to cry.
"Is he really afraid of birds?" Sirius asked, both staring at Atticus, him being a little scared. "Very, especially the black birds— crones? Crows? One of the two." Nora whispered, grimacing a little for the boy.
Before she knew it, it was her turn, her heart suddenly beating faster, having her wand out, gripping it hard that she felt her nails cutting into her. Taking a deep breath and watching the wardrobe shake a little before opening, Nora pulled her lips into a fine line, watching the door open.
Everyone began to be quiet when it was a person who stepped out, staring at Nora with her dark grey eyes and brunette hair. It was her, clearly angry as she huffed, shaking her head. She was soaking wet, water dripping down, not wearing any shoes, a scar right across her cheek.
Noras mind felt clouded, the girl in front of her so vulnerable, dropping to her knees and crying, mumbling out something. Noras hand started to shake, trying to hear what she was saying.
"He's gone, they're all gone! You're going to be alone forever!" The boggart yelled, crying more. Nora dropped her wand, realizing what that meant, watching someone stand in front of her, her ears ringing as people tried to console her, Nora pushing them all off.
She wanted to cry, escaping the classroom as she dropped to her knees in the corridor, choking back on her tears, staring off into the distance. Her biggest fear was losing those she loved, clearly during the war.
Her stomach churned horribly, feeling like she was punched, and couldn't breathe, an emotion she hadn't felt in a long time, embarrassed for herself for acting this way; putting her knees to her chest as she put her face in between. She needed to be in darkness, her thoughts being clouded with fear.
As much as it was all fake, her presence being there felt so weird, water dripping on the floor, the scar, her hair looked shorter too; it all felt too real for something like this to not happen.
She heard the door open, two boys bickering to each other, scowling and almost going to fight. "Nora, everything is okay, that was clearly fake." Sirius said, both sitting on each side of her.
Nora wasn't one for physical touch, and neither was Atticus, already having an understanding. Sirius on the other hand, kept patting her leg, letting her know he was there for her, all three still sitting in silence.
"Why did it feel real though?" Nora lifted her head to see them both, sniffling a little. The boys stayed silent, not too sure of what to say, feeling stuck.
"I mean, that's clearly my biggest fear, losing people..." Nora whispered the end, shaking her head and standing up. "I can't do this; I need to go lie down." She told Sirius and Atticus, choking up on her tears.
She didn't want anyone to follow her, Sirius trying to say something as Atticus yells another thing. Her emotions were too high to talk, putting her head down from hoping people wouldn't see her like this, rushing down the steps and corridors to go back to the dungeons.
Rushing into the common room and seeing only Avery and Theo, she noticed they were setting up for their party, immediately stopping when they saw Nora in such pain. "Bloody hell, whose arse do we have to kick?" Avery asks, grabbing his wand from his sleeve.
"I just... I need to lay down." Nora told them, walking up the steps as Theo grinned, knowing they somehow wore off the charm the girls dorms have, grabbing Noras hand to help her go up the stairs.
"What's wrong?" He asked her calmly, walking her into the dorm. Her dorm was probably the tidiest of all the girls, not a piece of clothing on the ground. Nora closed her eyes for a moment before laying down on her bed, not wanting to talk to him.
"Nothing, I just want to be alone for now theo." Nora drifted off, turning around in her bed and seeing a mover picture of her and her brothers when they were younger, her eyes beginning to water.
Grabbing the picture and watching all of them have such beautiful smiles, Nora looks at how small regulus was, Sirius' hair too long for him. Her mind kept replaying, staring at them and thinking if this is what she meant, losing her two brothers in this war, her life being stripped away from those she love.
Atticus, Evan, James, Theo and Avery, not to mention Lupin sometimes. Was she going to truly be alone all by herself, not understanding by what type of gone. Dead? Moved away, or sold themselves to keep them safe with the dark lord. Her mind was going in a spiral, soon causing that for her to sleep, clutching the picture close to her chest.
His ears felt like they were bleeding, only being at this party because it was his common room, sitting on his favourite spot of the couch and watching everyone get drunker as the night goes by. Regulus hated parties, he didn't know why, but something about dancing, drinking and being totally out of your mind didn't sound fun for him.
He rather drown than be caught dead dancing to music and being too drunk to remember the next day. He didn't know where his sister was, a little worried as he watched Atticus take another swig, leaning against the wall and watching those on the dance floor.
Staring at the ones who stood out the most to him was a game, saying a little scenario and the reason as to why they are doing what they are doing. For Atticus, it was simple, he's been rejected by three girls since fourth year, numbing the pain every time there's a party.
His sister? Using it to numb her mind to or think about the worst, usually using it to stay happy. It wasn't healthy, but their father practically brushed his teeth with liquor, not knowing what safe drinking was.
Nott and Avery loved to party, they were different from those regulus always saw, wanting to have the time of their life under the gloomy days they have, at Hogwarts or at home. Every Pureblood reacted different with alcohol, even if they had the same trauma.
Turning to his left to notice Potter was standing near the girls staircase for quite some time, the two exchanged awkward looks, both not wanting to see each other. Regulus never understood what Nora had seen in him, not sure if they ever got back together after the break, realizing he'll have to figure it out sooner or later.
"Oi, wheres you sister?" Potter asks him in a rude tone, regulus leaning back and noticing him also drinking. "Probably studying, she's not a fan of parties." Regulus raised his voice a little for potter to hear him, shrugging his shoulders.
"I'm worried, after todays DADA lesson she ran off and I never saw her." Standing up and needing to hear tnat again, an alert went off in his mind, wondering what potter meant by that.
"Why?" Regulus asks, Potter swallowing the little lump in his throat before he wanted to talk, putting his drink down. "Her boggart was herself, but telling her she lost everyone." Potter said as if he wasn't drunk, his eyes growing sad.
Her boggart.
Panic hit regulus too fast, excusing himself from potter as he wanted to find Sirius or Atticus, finding his brother first, feeling rhe need to give him hell. Luckily for him, he was standing beside himself, talking to a brunette girl as she went back to dance, leaving him alone again.
"What the fuck Sirius? Our sisters boggart is herself and that doesn't raise any questions for you as to why she's acting weird?" He yells over the music, grabbing his drink and putting it on the table.
"Raise any questions? What are you talking about?" Sirius looks at him confused, running a hand through his hair.
Regulus knew they were going to feel too exposed, demanding his brother come outside, the prefects already done their rounds to not get caught.
"Do you remember the summer before second year for you two? We went to aunt Druellas manor for dinner, Nora went with Bella to see her jewelry collection, next thing she knows Bella is testing her and her bloody boggart is her, telling her she will forever be a mistake and a nobody. Mother had to erase her memories and what her fear was after three weeks after nonstop crying and sleepless nights. No wonder she's confused because in third year, she had no fears, nothing came out."
Panting a little from the adrenaline to say the story, regulus watched his brother come to a realization of her boggart from third year, everything making sense to him.
Sirius pinched the bridge of his nose, taking a second, looking back at his teary eyed brother. "I'm worried about her, this whole time I thought she just wanted to study at the library after hours, but she's been upstairs the whole time because of today?" regulus clenched his jaw, holding his strength, not wanting to show weakness.
"Reggie I'm trying, I was there for her after it happened. I calmed her down before she went back to the dorms. I'm trying here."
"You're not trying hard enough, either help me get her better or just stay away like usual Sirius." Regulus rolled his eyes, walking back into the common room, hoping nobody took his spot, sitting back down and slumming a little, having to wait 'till morning to see his sister, worried for her more and more.
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not totally in love with this chapter; after multiple edits this is my best shot to really portray the downfall of Nora, this is where it all begins for her, the war, Sirius and regulus, and not to mention her relations with James are all going to be tricky now, expressing her feelings and making her have that development from when I started the book.
One thing; don't be mad at things that are to come ;)
-t