[ C H A P T E R 21 ]
LATISHA VALENTINE
Napatahimik ako sa sinabi ni Nethys. The way he stressed over that matter seems like a grave situation. Naiintindihan ko ang sinabi niya at kung bakit ganito ang tingin nila sa taong paparating. I may know a little about what truly happened during Annabelle's pregnancy, and I also fear the same thing for myself, but Napoleon is needed for the commencement of my plan.
He is also in danger right now. Partly, kasalanan ko kung bakit. He is running for re-election, and if Napoleon Jakare Lamperouge wins this year's Lord of the State position, the stakes will be higher and my freedom will be in grasp. Nababahala man ako sa mangyayari, pero nananaig sa kaibuturan ng pagkatao ko ang pagiging metikuloso.
The war will commence right after the election. Kasalukuyan pa namin inaalam kung ano ang plano ng nasa kabilang partido. I know Magnus is working for the new leader of the Moore Clan, but I have faith that he'll help us. Ito din ang dahilan kung bakit palaging umaalis si Blessime.
"I will be fine, Nethys," mahinang sabi ko. I looked at him with assurance and a simple nod. "You know what I am capable of. Hindi ko hahayaan na may sisira sa pamilya na binubuo ko."
Nethys diverted his eyes in front. I noticed his shoulder loosened but his guard is intact. "I hope you'll not going to hurt the Duke," he said. His voice was filled with worry but there was a threat accompanying his voice.
Napakunot ang noo ko. "Bakit lahat kayo ang tingin sa akin ay kaya kong saktan ang Duke? I already did, but he deserves it naman. Right now, his safety is also my responsibility."
"Forgive me, Valentine. Pero hindi ako naniniwala sa mga ginagawa mo," Nethys uttered. His voice filled with seriousness made me think what got into him to ever say that way.
"Why don't you trust me?" I asked. Hindi ko nilulubayan ng tingin si Nethys kahit hindi naman siya nakatingin sa akin. He is hiding something, I know it— I can feel it.
"Remember who died protecting your father?" he asked. This time, his gaze slowly settled on me. Nakipagtitigan ako sa kanya at bakas ang walang emosyon sa kanyang mukha. "The village thought Burton was dead, but he was in flesh months ago until he finally rested for real. You lied about his identity for years, and made me think you killed him."
"I didn't lie," I uttered. Mariin ang pagbigkas ko sa mga salita. "You didn't ask me directly if I am affiliated. I let it slide because it is trivial, Nethys. Anong kinalaman nito sa kung bakit hindi mo ako kayang pagkatiwalaan?" dagdag ko.
"Because you have a lot of skeletons in your closet, your grace. Hindi man tinatanong ng iba, pero matagal na kaming napapaisip kung bakit ka umalis at bumalik," sagot niya. Nagsukatan lang kami ng tingin. Right now, Nethys is frying me. He's trying to extract something from me.
"Why exactly are you up to?" tanong ko. I feel bothered that Nethys is becoming a puzzle, difficult to understand and decipher. May alam ba siya sa mga bagay na hindi niya dapat malaman?
"Let's just say that I am on the Duke's side," he answered. Inayos niya ang kanyang tindig bago ibaling sa ibang direksyon ang tingin nito. "Hindi ko alam kung ano ang dahilan, your grace. Pero sa puntong ito, hindi ako tatayo lamang at maghihintay ng utos. I am protecting Annika because it's the Duke's order. So, remember, Valentine, if you ever try to hurt the Reidensteigh heirs, I am one of your enemies."
"You know they are both heirs," I said. Hindi ako makapaniwala sa narinig ko sa kanya. "You know who Annika's—"
"Your Grace!"
Hindi ko natapos ang sasabihin ko nang marinig namin ang boses ni Cyan. I glanced at Cyan and noticed he was marching his way towards us. Impatience burst at me when my gaze diverted back to Nethys.
"Mukhang alam mo din," sagot ni Nethys sa akin. "The Clovers knew it already because we were present from the beginning. Right now, I don't have any options to think about why you planned to conceive at this crucial year, other than thinking of taking the position of the heir to the Dukedom."
"I bore no ill-fates," I uttered firmly. Hindi ko na nagugustuhan ang daloy ng usapan namin ni Nethys. Parang nakikipag-usap ako sa isang taong may dalawang personalidad. He was never like this when others were around, and this is the first time he ever confronted me.
"I love the Duke, and even if I can't prove how much I love him, I will not use his grace for my own personal desire," I continued. Napahawak na ako sa aking tiyan dahil sa stress na nararamdaman ko. "If you think I am a threat, you are freely allowed to entertain your thoughts. But let me remind you, Nethys. I am the Duchess of Reidensteigh. I carry the name of the Dukedom."
Hindi ko na hinintay ang sasabihin niya at naglakad na paalis. I ignored Cyan and walked past him. Halata ang pagtataka nito pero hindi niya ako hinabol para makiuso. Deretso lang akong bumalik sa loob ng Duchy.
Nethys thinks I am a threat, and for sure Laphel can vouch for that too. Alam ko ang pagbabalik ko dito ay hindi maganda sa pandinig ng lahat kahit pa man halos nagkikita kami tuwing gusto ni Roshan na magtipon.
Kakagising ko lang sa mahabang pagtulog at may dumagdag pa sa problema na kinakaharap namin, kaya alam kong ang reaksyon ng ilan ay akusahan ako. I am the one who's making a mess. I am the rebel that is bound to destroy this Empire.
Lahat ng nangyayari ngayon ay dahil sa akin. I know what I did, and is it my fault that I desire for freedom from the chain of my own heritage? Hindi ko pinili ang angkan ko, dahil sa umpisa pa lang, wala na akong karapatan sa buhay ko.
This is the first time I had grabbed my own fate. Unang beses akong nagdesisyon sa kinabukasan ko, kaya malamang patong-patong talaga ang problema na kailangan kong harapin. The only thing I must focus on right now is to prevent my Clan from winning the election. If that happens, the future will change.
"Your grace...?" Napatigil ako sa paglalakad ng marinig ko ang boses ni Logan. Agad siyang lumapit at tinitigan ako sa mukha. Napakunot naman ang aking noo sa uri ng titig niya.
"Bakit? May problema ba sa mukha ko?" tanong ko sa kanya. Bahagya kong hinawakan ang aking magkabilang pisngi. "Tumataba ba ako, Logan? Kailangan ko na bang limitahan ang pagkain ko?"
Dahan-dahan siyang umiling. "Hindi naman, Madame. Ang ganda at sexy mo pa rin naman," nakangiti niyang sabi. Subalit agad nanliit ang kanyang mga mata at tinitigan ako ng maigi. "Sino umaway sa 'yo? Bakit parang galit ka?"
Napakurap ako. "Wala naman, gusto ko lang magpahinga," agad na sagot ko. I held my tummy again when it started to ache. "I will be in my chamber for a while. Report to me instantly once the Lord of the State arrives."
"Affirmative, your grace," he uttered.
I just nodded and continued my stride towards the Duke's Chamber. Sumama talaga ang pakiramdam ko ngayon kaya kailangan kong magpahinga. I am thinking about what Nethys said, and it's disrupting my pregnancy.
Napabuntong-hininga na lamang ako nang makarating ako sa silid. Right now was the time where it all sinks in. I should be careful of how I act from now on. Nethys is suspicious, Laphel is avoiding me, Cyan and Wince seem the same old punks. I still don't know what Erwan and Sir Hasan think.
Ito ang dahilan kung bakit salungat akong umuwi. I should have run away when we got the chance but I feel bad for leaving Roshan for the second time. My plan was to go back to the Duchy after the election, after we eliminate the Moore Clan to the enemies we have in hand. But Roshan was persistent in bringing me home.
Kung hindi lang talaga kami nagkita, hindi ako malalason, hindi maipapasok ang Hashire na 'yon sa sitwasyon, at lalong wala ako sa Duchy ngayon. Ang hirap, sobrang hirap mag-isip kapag nasa bakod ako ng Duke.
"Ah," daing ko. Napahawak ako sa aking tiyan. The pain I felt earlier can't compete with the pain I am feeling now. Muntik pa akong madulas dahil hindi ko nahawakan ang upuan ng maayos. "Calm down, Latisha," dagdag ko.
I almost forget how this feels. How my blood boils making me go insane. How I crave violence over seeing blood. This time, even the absence of blood I can feel it. I'm breaking, she's breaking apart. My twin is breaking apart.
Halos pilitin ko ang aking sarili na tumayo at dahan-dahan na tinungo ang walk-in-closet ng Duke. I don't understand why I would be triggered by words, instead of blood. Maybe, my sister knew I could tolerate it and started seeking other ways to control me.
I reached the closet and pushed a button, making the door automatically closed. It will only be opened from the outside because this closet is designed to trap someone inside. I can't let my violent nature spree on the premises.
"Let's wait here," I whispered. I am reassuring myself that I am safe inside. Ever since I conceived, I am becoming more sensitive, and my behavior goes along with it.
Napasandal na lamang ako sa pader habang hinahabol ang aking hininga. I am trying to overpower my own emotions despite it getting intolerable. Please, stop it.
May naririnig akong mahinang boses habang paulit-ulit ang pagsasalita nito sa kaloob-looban ko. I know I can surpass this battle because I already did it before. I have to trust myself that I will not let her control me again.
Kill. Kill. Kill.
A sound resonating like a broken drum, constantly repeating itself, making my control slips like water I am barely holding. I could feel my heart pounding relentlessly as sweat dripped out of my forehead. The air is dense, the closet starting to get narrow.
Kill. Kill. Kill. Kill them all.
"Stop...stop...stop..." I muttered as I held my head. I can feel like the world is moving, it's spinning, moving in every direction, making me hazy. "Calm down," I added.
Napaigtad ako ng biglang bumukas ang closet. My entire system panicked and I started losing control. Nang tuluyan bumukas ang pintuan ay agad kong sinugod ang unang taong nakita ko.
I used my right fist to attack first and twirl my leg to hit his hip. It seems like this person anticipated my action, making him respond in defense.
"Your grace!"
I could hear Wince exclaim, but I didn't listen and continued my attacks. I couldn't even see properly because my vision was in a haze. I know I was attacking Wince but I couldn't stop even though they tried to do that.
May biglang humila sa akin palayo kay Wince. I was then immediately tucked into an embrace, and a hand stroke my head trying to calm me down. Of course, I also know who it was but I couldn't control my body. I pushed Roshan and aimed a punch at him. Agad siyang umilag at halos lahat ng atake ko ay walang tumama.
"Wife, calm down, please!"
I could hear him begging, but I couldn't. Believe me, I tried to speak but I couldn't move my mouth. My whole locomotors are being controlled. I used my leg to hit Roshan again and this time, he tried to knock me down.
"Careful, your grace. She's carrying your child!" Wince warned. I know Roshan will not hurt me. Hindi niya ako diniin sa sahig kahit alam niyang pwede akong makalaya sa pagkakahawak niya. Parang doon lang din ako nahimasmasahan dahil sa sinabi niya.
When Roshan felt my body relaxed, he pulled me up and embraced me tightly. I could hear his words whispering in my ears, and my eyes began to water. "Come back to me, wife...please, come back to me."
I was finally able to control my hand, and lift it up to stroke his hair. He felt what I did, making his embrace grow tighter. Nagpadala na lamang ako sa yakap niya kahit halos madurog na din ang puso ko. His heartbeat was not in a calm rhythm. He was scared.
"I am sorry," I uttered. My voice almost broke, but my tears already burst. "I am so sorry..."
"It's okay," he whispered back. "No one is hurt, wife. Everything will be okay."
I don't know if everything will be okay, but I trust his words. Hinayaan niya akong kumalma sa mga bisig niya hanggang dalhin niya ako sa sofa para umupo. Wince handed him a glass of water and he gave it to me. Uminom naman agad ako sa baso at napabuntong-hininga pagkatapos.
"Tell me what happened?" he asked. His hand was rubbing on my back as he looked at me with anticipation in his eyes. "No one was hurt in the Duchy, why would you lock yourself in the closet?"
I stared directly into his amber orbs. There is worry, confusion, and anticipation written all over his face. Hinawakan ko ang magkabilang pisngi niya bago ko sagutin ang kanyang tanong.
"She's getting stronger," I explained. My hands were trembling while holding him, which made him hold them both to calm it. He didn't say anything, so I continued. "Ever since I woke up from that incident, I've been having a weird sensation, Roshan. My sensitivity heightened, I feel trapped in my own thoughts sometimes. It feels like I am not me, and I keep on hallucinating things."
He parted his lips but no words came out from them. I didn't divert my attention and let him find the sincerity of my words through my eyes. I wasn't lying because that is what I've been feeling.
"I can feel it, your grace. I can feel she's trying to control me not just by blood, but my pregnancy," I said. Finally, I admitted something that had been bugging me lately. Biglang binaba ni Roshan ang mga kamay ko at sinandal ang kanyang noo sa akin.
He closed his eyes, trying to suppress his emotions but he failed as he opened them and fear is still there. "Raphael did say that he encountered something inside you while he was healing you. At first I was reluctant to explain your case, but after hearing it, he went on and fixed your blood circulation," he said.
He paused for a while, but he didn't move nor look away. "Wife," he called me. "He said that your pregnancy will test you. He didn't just heal you, Latisha. He puts a binding spell inside you that tames the magic, but it will try to resist, which makes you feel something different." Roshan's voice was filled with worry, and his eyes emit the same emotions as it was looking at mine.
"Why am I hearing this now?" I asked.
"I want you to know that aside from agreeing to his bargain, I also added a deal," he replied. His hands were now stroking my hair. "I want him to take the soul of your twin from you. He can do that, he will do that."
*~*~*~*
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