Veda and I were settling into our guest house a little too comfortably. Veda's clothes were strewn all over it, and every piece of cutlery or item from the kitchen she had used got left where she had been at the time. There were four mugs beside the couch, and three plates with cutlery in her bedroom, and that was just the stuff that was visible.
Somehow her mess, made me want to be less so, and so I kept my area as neat as possible, and my bedroom just so. The way she was with kitchen utensils made me never want to cook another meal again, and I didn't really have to... because Allie had been cooking for us, mostly, she says, it is to her delight.
Willa and Allie have both been incredible hosts and have not once made us feel as if we were a trouble to have around or in their way. Willa took me into the city and helped me file some paperwork in regards to Vedas temporary guardianship, and she found me a great Lawyer through Teddy, who knew just the person for family law.
Harper and Teddy were actually due over for dinner with Josephine and Bastion this evening. I felt a little nervous to be around, knowing I had broken up with their daughter, and I didn't know how they would be with me, so I declined an invite to join them, made up some excuse, and instead would hide for now and pretend I didn't exist.
I had been lazing in the bath when I heard Veda return from dinner, with a few more voices right behind her.
"Millie... there's someone who wants to see you" Veda called out.
I sat upright as the water sloshed over the side of the bath, and I quickly leapt out and into a towel.
"I'll be right out" I called.
Panicked, I bolted into my adjoining room and slammed the door, drying as if it was for a world record and throwing on some shorts and a t shirt.
I fingered through my wet hair and looked into the mirror, giving myself a once over before I opened the door.
"You look like crap" I cursed at myself. My dark hair appeared black with the wetness of it, and my cheeks were pinked from the steam. I wasn't exactly the creature from the black lagoon, but then everybody usually saw me when I was all put together, and this, wasn't it.
I had no idea who it was who had come to see me, and so as I step out into the living area I'm hoping it's not Wrens parents... and I'm relieved when it's confirmed.
Sat on the couch and playing a handheld game console with Veda, is Bash... and Josie.
Veda looked up and noticed my presence first "Snow white" she gestured toward me "you have guests"
Bash and Josie both look up, and with a beaming smile Bash tossed the game into Josie's hands and ran over to me with arms spread as he leapt into mine.
"Millie" he said lovingly squeezing my neck with his arms. "I missed you"
Josie walked over and put a hand on his shoulder, pulling him back to his feet "he's a little over excited to have you here" she confessed.
I bent down and bopped his nose "well I'm happy you're here too"
"I missed you guys" I confess.
Josie's hazel eyes look me over curiously "are you staying for good"
I stand up and shrug slightly "I'm not sure. At the moment... no... but if things change... I mean ... maybe. Never say never right"
"You mean if Wrens changed... you'll stay" she asks.
"Wren is at camp" Bash explains. "Olympia pushed her off a boat into the ocean and she almost got dead... but she didn't... and my moms were mad"
"Soooo mad" Josie agrees.
I find myself looking between the youngest Nomikos Siblings like a game of eyeball ping pong as they both hurriedly fill me in on their summer so far. It sounded, as expected... a little chaotic.
"But you got puppy's right" I asked them, changing the subject from Wren. I wasn't prepared for how much seeing Wrens family and then talking about her, whilst I hadn't been part of her life these last months, would make me feel so lost...
"We did" Bash says excitedly. His dimples deepening.
It was then that I noticed Veda had Mr Darcy on her lap as she sat with Bash's game console and played it quietly.
Despite Mr Darcy being a baby, he was dwarfing Veda already, clumsily sat on her lap and snuggled into her.
"Mr Darcy isn't allowed in the guest house" I remind her.
"Says who" she asks.
"Says the laws of ownership. He's Allie and Willas and they live next door"
"Gaga and Lala actually said Veda could take him with her, since he had got up and stolen an entire chicken carcass from the table whilst nobody was looking" Josie explained.
"Chicken carcass" I ask, wrinkling up my nose with how unappealing that sounded.
"Josies a Vegan" Veda informed me, despite the fact I knew it already and had forgotten "She makes every meal with meat sound like a funeral for a pet"
"You've only had two meals together" I remind Veda.
"Both of them she put me off eating" she threw back.
Josie went over and lifted a heavy looking Mr Darcy over her arms and into her lap. It looked an effort. He was a fluffy and massively large boned dog. She kissed his nose and lifted him up "would you kill Mr Darcy and chop him up for your dinner" she asked me and Veda.
Veda looked like she smelt something awful and grabbed him back into her own arms "don't say that" she said sitting down and covering his folded back ears "he will have nightmares"
"All the animals cramped up in holding cells awaiting their deaths have nightmares Veda... and you eat them despite it"
Veda looks like she's been slapped in the face. Her cheeks pink up, and she looks like she might even cry.
"Josie don't be mean" Bash tells her as he takes back his console and throws himself back onto the couch "Mama said not to scare people" he reminds her.
"People have to know where their meat comes from... it's sick. And Mama said not to mention it in front of Yia Yia... and the family...she never said not to mention it in front of friends"
"Friends" Veda asked.
Josephine smiled and sat down beside her "I hope we can be. Schools about to start and Gaga said you were coming to Laurelwood. I'd love to show you around if you want"
Veda looked relieved. "I would love that... thanks"
I sat in the armchair across from them and watched how Veda and Josephine hit it off almost instantly, despite the meat dilemma. As it was, within a week of knowing Josephine, Veda would also be Vegan and judging me for the gelatine in my pop tarts.
Veda braided Josephine's blonde hair, and taught her how to braid Bastions, which made them all laugh. It was like a chain of monkeys pawing at each other for flees. They asked me questions, naturally, curiously, about where I had been and why I had left. I kept it as brief as possible, knowing they didn't know a thing of Wrens troubles. Within an hour there was another knock at the door, and Harper and Teddy came in, with Allie and Willa close behind. The small space seemed like a studio apartment at a New Year's party, everyone squeezed together in one space. Puppy's suddenly everywhere. It was giving Beethoven, the second movie.
"We came to collect the rabble" Teddy announced.
"Hey" Harper said coming over and squeezing my shoulder.
I stood and hugged her "Hey, I'm sorry if this isn't okay... they just wanted to grill me on where I've been"
Harper looked to them and shook her head "I raised some nosey little people"
"She says..." Teddy accuses "like she's not going to ask them for the tea as soon as we get in the car"
Harper playfully swats her "Theodora shush"
I bent down and petted the puppies. Henrietta was bigger than Mr Darcy, and Chewy was teeny in comparison. I would be concerned she would smother him in his sleep by accident.
"I love the new family members" I say, standing back up.
Allie sits beside the girls and finishes off the braid in Josephine's hair. "Olympia and Wren left a huge hole their moms couldn't wait to fill" she mused.
"Not true" Harper replied "we just didn't much like the silence"
Willa wrapped her arms around Teddy's shoulders from the back and leant her chin on her black fitted faux leather jacket lovingly "Quiet with this family usually spells trouble... so we will always find a way to fill it with something" she says with a laugh .
"Accurate" Teddy throws back.
"Can I borrow you" Teddy asks, gesturing toward me to follow her back outside.
Everyone stopped and looked her way. Why did I feel like I was about to be told off.
"Sure" I said a little apprehensively.
Willa released Teddy and patted my arm as I passed by her "don't worry... she doesn't bite"
Teddy Nomikos was a force of nature, and despite not knowing her before I met Wren... I had done my homework since. I could see where Wren got her determination and drive from to excel at her sport. I was always impressed when she got up at five am and went to train or to the gym... despite it being cold out, and my warm body pressed to hers. I didn't have that same drive for physical strength, my own Mother had instilled in me the need to excel with mental strength and intelligence instead.
Teddy came to a stop outside on the porch and turned, gesturing to the two white rocking chairs that looked out over Willa and Allie's slice of heaven.
"Don't worry... it's nothing serious" she explained.
"Is Wren okay" I ask, taking the seat beside her.
Teddy nods and gives me a reassuring look, my goodness this woman was beautiful, I hoped to god I looked half as good when I hit my forties. Her glossy curls fell down her shoulder as she leant down to stroke Henrietta who had followed us out, and appeared to be her little shadow.
"She's good. She's at Soccer training. Will be until the end of summer" she says, looking back up and placing one leg over the other to get comfortable.
"That will be good for her" I reply, not knowing how deep this conversation should go into Wrens behaviour before we split.
"I wanted to thank you" she says, looking out over the garden to the lake beyond.
"For what" I ask.
She looks back to me ever so briefly "for letting her go... knowing it wasn't the right time for this relationship"
"Oh" I whisper, taken aback "So, you're not about to make me disappear for hurting her"
"No, your maturity showed in that decision Millie. Harper and I were so scared for her, and it was obvious to us that she wasn't being herself. She had wanted you so badly that she couldn't wait to go and find you. But, it wasn't the time. She should have waited. I know though, how love makes you step over those boundaries, even when you know you shouldn't" she shares empathetically "None of it was your fault, or even Wrens. She lost her confidence, her focus and drive, and was on a collision course after Max. He truly made my child feel like she didn't even trust herself anymore, and like she didn't know who she even was"
Teddy looked like she could kill him, she bit down on her lip and wrung out her hands.
I felt my heart drop thinking about the change in her, from the moment I met her until the day we parted. She wasn't the Wren I met, not at the end. I wasn't the person she met either. "I know what it is to find out your genetics are one half predator" I reveal.
Teddy sat up straighter, her eyes focused on me intensely. She hadn't known that. I could see how she was trying to find the right words to say, but it wasn't a subject anybody liked to touch on. Being the product of a sexual act that your mother hadn't truly wanted... it wasn't something you could explain without a horrid feeling of guilt for even existing.
"I didn't know that" Teddy said softly, her hand reaching over and squeezing mine. "I'm sorry that you know how Wren feels"
I shake my head and sit forward, taking my hand and running it over my forehead as I tried to catch a breath. I look sideways as I exhale "It's because I know how she feels that I suggested we take a break. We couldn't go on like we were. We both deserved more. We needed to heal... apart"
"So that you can come back together a whole" Teddy questions with a hopeful lift of her lips.
"I hope so. If she will ever forgive me"
Teddy sits back in her chair a little more comfortably and I do the same. The sound of the wind coming through the trees around us lends to the calm I suddenly feel. The wind chimes begin to play a tune beyond the porch.
"My daughter knows what real love looks like Millie... and I shouldn't think she ever missed the way you looked at her. I know none of us did. You love my daughter...and she loves you too. What you did wasn't something that needs forgiveness"
"You think she loves me still"I ask, knowing she hadn't returned one text in four months. I don't know where Wrens head was at, because silence brought only doubts.
Teddy almost seems amused "Millie... if she didn't ... do you think she would have given the Okay for you to stay here"
"She knows I'm here" I ask, that was the first I had heard of it.
"Willa called her to check it was okay. Before Wills had even mentioned she offered you the guest house... Wren suggested it when she heard you got the job at the school"
"She did" I ask, my mind was whirling like a snow storm now. Wren had suggested I stay here, despite not talking to me in four months and never texting me back.
Teddy reads my mind "See... she cares. If she never wanted to see you again she would never have suggested you live in the heart of the family"
"I'm confused" I confess "but I'm relieved too... that she wasn't horrified and mentally packing my bags for me to get out"
Teddy laughed "My girls aren't shy at expressing how they feel. If they wanted you gone you would know about it"
I think of Wrens story's about Olympia and her obsession with torching cars, and look to my shiny black mustang. My mother had got me the car for graduating college. I'd hate to see it licked by flames.
"So stay" Teddy asked "stay and see this six months through, and just see how it plays out. If you are both meant to grow together, and not apart, you will find a way"
"Thank you" I say "for letting me be here... with Veda too."
Teddy stood up and reached out her hand to pull me to my feet "Willa Jameson is the driving force in this one. She can't stand an unfinished story... she gets it from Mary"
"I noticed they watch a lot of romance movies together" I mention as we walked back inside. "Mary told me I need to sit and join them. Apparently purging ones tears to romantic dramas is the kind of therapy I need"
"I think you'll find that's more of a hostage situation for poor Wills, but she secretly loves it, and she's right... sometimes a good cry helps"
"I guess I could do with a purge" I confess as we ushered Henrietta inside and shut the door on the evening air.
And I did, I sat for a whole Saturday with Veda and Mary, and we sobbed our hearts out to 'the fried green tomatoes at the whistle stop cafe' among many others Mary highly recommended.
Why did I have to fall in love?! I had made it to twenty three without its stirrings or its influence over me... and now I was it's servant and obeying loyal minion.
There wasn't a minute that ticked by that Wren didn't filter into my mind...and I had tried to ignore it, believe me... but it wasn't so easy to ignore the one person your heart and soul desired above any other.
Wren Nomikos might currently be my ex girlfriend.... But my heart told me to take the ex right out of it.