*3rd Person POV*
Flashback
"Yesterday this Galveston shoreline was being pounded by ten foot swells and winds up to 150 miles per hour...but today, well, there's not a cloud in sight. Hurricane Tiffany has broken up over the Gulf -" the news reporter said from the TV that was playing while Bobby is working on some sort of magical ritual. He cuts his palm and adds his blood to the ingredients in a large bowl.
"Et ad congregandum...Eos coram me." He recites and he lights a match and sets the ingredients in the bowl alight. Crowley appears in the kitchen doorway. "Been making merry, have we?" Crowley asked. "Bite me." Bobby growls. "If that's your thing." Crowley said then he snaps fingers to turn off TV and steps toward Bobby.
"That Swan dive of Sam's was a thing of beauty. Tens all the way round. Standing ov from the Romanian judge. You should be proud, Bobby. As deaths go, it wasn't too shabby. Cheer up, mate, we just saved the sodding world together. Me, I've been celebrating." Crowley said. "I'd hate to see what you call celebrating." Bobby sneers and Crowley smirks. "Yes, you would." he replied.
Bobby lifts a bottle of alcohol and offers it to Crowley. "Drink?" he asked the demon. "No!" Crowley said, appalled, and Bobby pours himself a drink. "Let me get this straight - we just..." Bobby said then he goes to mock Crowley's accent. "saved the sodding world together..." then he goes back to his normal voice. "...and you're too good to drink with me?" He asked. "Obviously." Crowley said and he points to a bottle on the television. "I doubt that you have my brand." he said.
"What's your poison, your highness?" Bobby asked and Crowley breaths in deep. "Craig. Aged 30 years at least. I've been drinking it since grade school." Crowley said. "Well, I got old rotgut aged 6 days." Bobby said and takes a drink as Crowley watches.
"Swill like that is gonna burn a hole in your soul - oops sorry, my soul. But that's why you called. Our little deal." Crowley said. "Yeah, well, it's about time you hold up your end and give it back." Bobby said. "Give it back?" Crowley asked, confused as he furrows his brow. "Our deal was, we ice Lucifer, you rip up the lease." Bobby growls and Crowley smirks.
"Oh." He mutters then he turns away from Bobby. "You didn't read your contract." He said. "The hell you talking about, contract?" Bobby asked and Crowley turns toward Bobby, snaps his fingers and points. Bobby writhes in pain as writing appears on his body. "Paragraph 18, subsection B, which is on you naughty bits - I only have to make best efforts to give you back your soul." Crowley explains.
"Meaning what?" Bobby asked. "Meaning..." Crowley said then makes a straining gesture and sighs. "I'd like to - but I can't." He said and Bobby glares at him as anger flares in his chest. "You lying sack of -" Bobby growls then Crowley cuts him off. "Ten years..." Crowley said as he walks across the room towards Bobby. "...you come to daddy. Until then, I suggest you start drinking the good stuff." He said.
"I figured you'd say that. So you can rot here till you change your mind." Bobby said. "Why? 'Cause you asked nicely?" Crowley asked and Bobby shakes his head. "No." Bobby said and he walks past Crowley to the back of the room. "'Cause I'm going Dateline on your ass." Bobby said and he turns off the light, revealing a Devil's Trap painted on the floor in glowing paint.
"I hope that's paint. Really." Crowley said before he sighs. "What am I going to do?" He asked and Bobby turns towards the kitchen to walk away just as Crowley lets out a sharp whistle. Bobby then hears the growl of Crowley's hell hound. Bobby grimaces as the hell hound breaths on his face.
"Doggie breath." Crowley said and Bobby covers his face. "Bracing, isn't it?" Crowley asked as Bobby gulps and turns towards Crowley. "Ball's in your court, Robert. Ten years of living or ten years as Alpo." Crowley said and Bobby looks in the direction of the growls and back at Crowley, with disgust.
Crowley just smirks, happily, as Bobby opens his pocket knife and approaches the circle. Bobby scrapes the paint, breaking the seal and setting Crowley free. "This ain't over." Bobby threatened as he holds the knife at him. "I wouldn't have it any other way." Crowley said and he walks out of the trap and pauses in front of Bobby. "Happy hunting." He said and he walks off leaving Bobby fuming.
Kenosha, Wisconsin
Present Day
Children are playing in the playground and not far away as Dean examines a body with a large hole in its chest. "No EMF. Find anything in there?" Peyton asked as Dean takes off his glove and drops it on the ground. "Yeah, I've got some kind of a claw." Dean said and he picks up the claw from the ground. "What in the hell has a claw like that?" Ben asked, disgust, as Dean pulls out his phone. "That is a good question." he said and he makes a call.
At Bobby's house, the phone rings but the room is empty.
Dean is still waiting for Bobby to answer and looks over at the others, who shrug. "Maybe he's in the can." Ben said and Dean rolls his eyes when he hears the phone being picked up.
"Hello?" A voice, that wasn't Bobby's, answered and Dean raises his head at this. "Claire?" Dean said and (y/n) gives Dean a look of worry. "Hi, Daddy!" Claire greets. "Hey, honey, uh...where's Uncle Bobby?" Dean asked her. "He's outside... doing something." Claire replied.
"Well, can you go get him for me, please, sweetie?" Dean asked her and Claire frowns. "Are you and Mommy coming back so we can go home?" Claire asked and now it was Dean's turn to frown. "What's the matter? You don't like staying with Uncle Bobby?" Dean asked her, concerned. "Not anymore. It's like we're always here now and you guys take forever to get back." Claire replied and Dean bites his lips, the guilt building in his chest.
"Do you and Mommy not love us anymore?" Claire asked, sounding upset, and this broke Dean's heart. "No, no, no...honey, it's not that. Your mother and I love you and Ryder very much. It's just...this job we do...it just asks alot from us." Dean said and Claire was about to ask something else when Bobby comes in from the kitchen back door, wiping his hands.
"Claire, sweetheart? Why do you have the phone?" Bobby asked her. "Daddy's on the phone. Said he wants to talk to you." Claire said, sadly, as she holds the phone out to him. Bobby takes it and Claire walks away, looking sad.
"Yeah?" Bobby answered. "What the hell, Bobby?!" Dean asked him, annoyed. "Hey, look! I just went outside for a bit, okay? I didn't know she was gonna come down here and answer the phone!" Bobby said, defensively. "Oh, yeah, and then she tells me that she thinks (y/n) and I don't love her and Ryder anymore." Dean growls and (y/n)'s eyes go wide and her jaw drops. "What?!" (Y/n) said, confused, and Bobby sighs and runs his hand over his face.
"Look, Dean, I'm sorry. Won't happen again." Bobby said and Dean sighs at this. "So...What's up?" Bobby asked him and Dean takes a deep breath then let's it out. "We're in Wisconsin. Six bodies, chests cracked wide open. No EMF, no sulfur, no hex bags. We did find this though - hold on." Dean said then he takes a picture of the claw with his cell phone.
"Alright, check your Wang." he said and Bobby watches as the image downloads from his email. "That's a new one." Bobby said, surprised. "Yeah. We need an ID ASAP. This thing is on a rampage. Call us as soon as you dig something up." Dean said and Bobby looks anxious.
"Dean, I'm a little busy. Remember? Watching over your kids?" he said and Dean sighs. "You know, this would be easier if you two would tell your kids what you do." Bobby said. "There's no way in hell that's gonna happen, Bobby!" Dean growls. "You can't hide the truth from them forever, Dean." Bobby said and Dean clenches his jaw.
"I mean, sooner or later, one of these monsters are gonna find them and..." Bobby started to say but Dean talks over him. "Bobby, please don't finish that sentence and just....just please help us." Dean pleads and now it was Bobby's turn to sigh. "I'll call you back." He sighed and hangs up the phone then starts his research.
Eventually, Bobby gets frustrated after looking through all of the books in his library. "Balls!" He exclaims as he slams a book shut. Bobby then goes upstairs to the spare room and sees Claire and Ryder watching the spare TV Bobby set up for them and Ace was laying near them.
"Hey, kids." Bobby said and they turn to him. "You, uh...you two wanna come into town with me?" He asked them and the kids smile a little at this.
After loading the kids up, Bobby drives off and passes his neighbor, who waves at him. Bobby waves back and he drives to town. They come upon Sioux Falls University Library and Bobby gets out of his truck to head in but it is closed. Bobby sighs and looks inside.
Bobby then goes around back and breaks a window to get inside. Bobby climbs in the window and falls inside. "Balls!" he shouts, pained, then begins to look for a book.
After finding the book, he goes back to the car and gets inside. "Okay..." he mutters then he looks over at the kids. "How do you kids feel about ice cream?" Bobby asked the kids and their eyes light up. "Really?!" Ryder asked him. "Yeah...just don't tell your mom and dad." Bobby said as he holds a finger up to his lips with a smirk on his lips.
The kids giggle and they nod, enthusiastically. Bobby tries to start the car, but the engine won't turn over. "Come on. Come on." Bobby grumbles as he tries the engine one more time and sighs. "Balls." he growls. "Swear!" Claire said and Bobby looks over at her then sighs again. "I know, darlin'. I'm sorry." He said, exhausted. "Looks like we're gonna be walking then." Bobby said and the kids frown at this but nod.
Later, after getting the kids some ice cream, they all headed back to Bobby's house on foot. "So, uh....how are you kids enjoying your summer?" Bobby asked them, not knowing what to say or even talk about. The kids lower their heads and Ryder said. "Not really."
"Oh, why is that?" Bobby asked them. "It's not anything against you, Uncle Bobby. It's just...we miss Momma and Daddy." Claire said. "Yeah, ever since Ben and Peyton showed up, they've been hanging around them and going to these jobs they keep talking about." Ryder said and Bobby frowns and feels bad for the kids.
"Well, I can assure you two that they are not being forced away from you two by choice. I know they want to be with you. It's just...a grown up thing they have to do." Bobby said. "I guess. But...we just missed how it used to be." Ryder said. "Yeah, we were hoping to go on trips and go to the fair Daddy promised us. But..." Claire said then she sighs.
Bobby didn't know what to say to that so he stayed quiet until they make it back to his house, which was already late by the time they got back. Claire and Ryder were extremely tired and Bobby helped them into bed before he got to work.
He started to nod off a few times but he did fall asleep at one point. He wakes with a start then takes some pills and drinks lots of coffee to keep going.
"You're hunting a Lamia." Bobby tells Dean over the phone, the next morning. "Come again?" Dean asked as he takes a bite of his sandwich. "It's a monster. Juices hearts, chugs the blood. Never heard of one popping up outside of Greece though." Bobby said then he sighs as Dean gets up. "Yeah, well, looks like this freak is immigrating. It's snacking on cheese heads. How do we gank it?" Dean asked and Bobby yawns.
"There's a couple of ways. Easiest is a silver knife blessed by a padre." Bobby explains. "Gotcha." Dean said and he hangs up the phone. Bobby looks at the receiver and speaks to the dial tone. "You're welcome."
Bobby hangs up and puts down the phone as he yawns. "Hey, I'm still here!" A female voice said from downstairs. Bobby then walks downstairs to the panic room. "Hey there, cranky. You were gone so long, I just assumed alcoholic coma." the woman said, her red eyes glaring at Bobby as she is tied to a chair inside a devil's trap.
"Where were we?" Bobby asked her. "Your soul." the demon purrs. "Right. Talk." Bobby demands. "Look at you, all in a rush. Foreplay..." she said as she uncrosses her legs and recrosses them. "...gets you more play."
"I want Crowley's name." Bobby demands and the crossroads demon looks at him and smiles. "His real name, back when he was flesh and blood." Bobby clarifies as the demon changes her red eyes to normal.
"Does tying up demons in your basement make you feel better about that time that you killed your wife?" She asked as Bobby picks up a bag and brings it over to the demon. "What's that?" she asked him. "You don't recognize them? They're yours." Bobby said and he places the bag in a large metal tub then lights a flame thrower.
"It won't work. It's a myth." The demon said but Bobby noticed that she did look a bit nervous. Then he looks at the flame. "Then you got nothing to worry about." he said and he points the flames over the metal tub. The demon screams in pain and Bobby lowers the flame thrower.
"I can't." The demon gasped, painfully, and Bobby makes the flames higher again over the tub. The demon screams again and Bobby lowers the flame thrower. "You don't know what he'll do to me." she said as some of her flesh was already burned. "Right now you better worry about me." Bobby said.
"You don't get it. He's the King." the demon pleads and Bobby burns her again. "King of the Crossroads. I've heard the speech." said Bobby as the demon groans in pain. "No. King of Hell." she said and then the doorbell rings. Bobby blows out the pilot of the flame thrower as the doorbell rings again.
"You gonna get that or what?" The demon asked him and Bobby scoffs.
Meanwhile, as the doorbell continued to ring, Claire heads down the stairs and rubs her eyes and goes to the door. "Hello?" She asked as she opens the door just a bit to see Bobby's female neighbor standing there, holding a container of food.
"Oh, hi!" The woman greets. "Hi." Claire said as she looks at the woman. "Aren't you just adorable? Um, is your dad home?" The woman asked her, sweetly. "No, he and my mom are out doing a job. This is my Uncle Bobby's house." Claire said as Bobby comes up the stairs and sees what's going on.
"Claire, honey, you know you're not supposed to answer doors alone." Bobby tells her as he comes up to the door and sees his neighbor.
"Marcy." He greets. "Bobby Singer. How long have we been neighbors?" Marcy asked him. "Six months?" Bobby guessed. "Well, don't you think it's time you welcomed me to the neighborhood?" Marcy asked and she offers the tray to Bobby and uncovers it. "My famous ginger peach cobbler." She said, proudly, and Bobby looks at it, then at Marcy.
"Take a whiff. Seriously, I'm a genius." Marcy said and Bobby sniffs, rolls his eyes and smiles. Claire sniffs and hums, approvingly, at it. Marcy also smiles. At that moment, Marcy and Claire then hear the crossroads demon screaming for help. Bobby closes the door slightly. "It's stupid horror flicks. Guilty pleasure." Bobby said as Claire looks around.
"I love scary movies. Hey, have you seen Drag Me To Hell?" Marcy asked him. "Trying to avoid it." Bobby said. "But it's fantastic." Marcy said before she takes a deep breath. "Saturday, seven o'clock, my house. I'll fix you dinner and I'll whip up a batch of my famous white chocolate popcorn and we'll watch it. Deal?" she asked and Bobby looks down.
"That sounds super, Marcy, but uh -" Bobby said as he gestures to Claire. "Okay, no worries. Um, hey, one other thing. Uh, my wood chipper - it's a piece of crap, you know. It just broke down on me and - and I hear that you're quite handy. Maybe you could come over and take a look. You know, just whenever -" Marcy said and Bobby nods. "Yeah. I'll see what I can do." he said and Marcy smiles. "Okay." she said.
The two look at each other, then shake hands. "Well, okay..." Marcy stammers as she holds Bobby's hand for a little longer. "...okay, I'll see you soon." She said as she waves goodbye then looks down at Claire. "It was nice meeting you." She said. "You too." Claire said and Marcy and Bobby turn to leave, each looking back at the other a few times. Bobby closes the door and smiles at the cobbler in his hands.
"Are you really watching a horror movie, Uncle Bobby?" Claire asked. "Uh, yes, honey, I am. And you don't need to be watching it. So you and your brother stay in your room and watch your TV. And don't come down until I tell you to." Bobby said and Claire eyes the cobbler.
"Can Ryder and I have some of that then?" Claire asked, pointing at the cobbler and Bobby looks at it then back at Claire, who gives him a sweet smile. "You are your Daddy's little girl." Bobby said and Claire giggles.
After making two bowls of cobbler for the kids, Bobby walks down the stairs to the basement. "You know, I thought I heard little children up there. You running a little orphanage up there? I mean, they can't be yours." The demon said as Bobby walks past her, ignoring her. "Or are you recruiting?" She asked and Bobby relights the pilot of the flame thrower.
"Okay, then how about that sweet woman you were talking to? You gonna make sweet love to her before you stab her to death? That is your usual thing, right?" the demon asked and Bobby aims the flame at the metal tub and the demon starts screaming again.
"I want Crowley's name now!" Bobby yells and the demon continues to scream, her flesh blister and burn. "Crowley's name!" Bobby demands and the demon whimpers. "Okay, okay." she said and Bobby ttake the flame off the tub. "MacLeod. Fergus MacLeod. I swear. We call him Lucky the Leprechaun behind his back." she said. "MacLeod's Scottish, Einstein." Bobby sneers.
"You got what you want, now send me back." The demon said and Bobby grabs a can of lighter fluid and soaks what's in the tub. "No!" The demon yells, panicked, as Bobby keeps pouring lighter fluid. "We had a deal." She yells. "I gave it my best effort." said Bobby. "No!" The demon screams as Bobby torches the items in the tub.
When he is finished, Bobby blows out the pilot light of the flame thrower.
"Yeah, Garth, what do you got?" Bobby asked as he listens to Garth and looks over a map of Scotland. "Never heard of a vamp doin' that. It doesn't sound like our kind of thing. Better drop a dime to the FBI." Bobby said and he hangs up the phone and places it back on its charger. Another phone labeled FBI Tom Willis rings.
"Willis, FBI." Bobby answers and listens to the caller. "No, Garth, not me, the FBI. The real FBI! How are you still alive?" Bobby said, annoyed, and he hangs up the phone and another line rings. It is labeled CDC Frank Castle. "Yeah, Castle." Bobby answers.
Again and again, the phones would ring and Bobby would answer each one to the phones that are labeled with the title he is to impersonate.
Eventually, he is reading and drinking his coffee when he hears banging on his door. Bobby gets up to answer the back kitchen door. It is Rufus Turner. "Oh, good, you're home! Listen. You gotta help me bury a body." Rufus said, out of breath, and Bobby stares in disbelief, then rolls his eyes.
"Why'd you bring it here?" Bobby asked Rufus as they walked out into his yard. "The law is on my tail! What was your guess?" Rufus asked and Bobby looks at him. "What, what, what? They got lucky." Rufus said and Bobby sighs. "Yeah, or you're getting slow." he said. "Yeah, I'm getting slow - says mister sits on his ass all day taking calls." Rufus sneers.
"Acutally, I've been babysitting, along with sitting on my ass and taking calls." Bobby said and Rufus stares at him and let's out a laugh of disbelief. "You babysitting? I don't believe it." Rufus said. "It's true. You remember Dean Winchester? It's his kids." Bobby said and Rufus stares at him.
"Thought he retired and settled down with that chick?" Rufus asked. "Well, was like that til about a month ago. Long story." Bobby said as they reach Rufus' truck.
Rufus lowers the tailgate and uncovers the body of an Asian woman. Rufus gestures at the body. "Vamp, shifter - what?" Bobby asked. "None of the above." Rufus said and he pulls the lips on the body back to expose the teeth and looks over at Bobby.
"Okami? Where'd you shiv it?" Bobby asked. "Get this. Billings." Rufus said as he closes the mouth. "The only time I ever saw one of these was in Japan." Bobby said. "Duh. No one's ever seen one of these except in Japan." Rufus said. "For what it's worth, (y/n) and Dean are tracking a Lamia in Wisconsin." Bobby said. "Get out. I thought they never leave Greece." Rufus said and Bobby shakes his head slightly.
Then he thinks what if this has to do with Eve, the mother of all monsters? That could explain alot of weird behaviors of monsters if she is definitely around. "Yeah well, it's definitely something." Rufus said and he stops pondering and snaps his head up. "So, you got a shovel?" He asked him.
Bobby uses a mechanical digger to dig a hole. Rufus stands by with a shovel, watching Bobby operate the machine. "Man, I know what I want for Hanukkah." Rufus said.
Later, Bobby and Rufus approach a deep, rectangular hole in the ground. Rufus drops the body into the hole then minutes later, Bobby and Rufus are finishing filling in the hole.
"So the son of a bitch's name is Fergus McCloud?" Rufus asked. "That's the son of a bitch's name." Bobby said as Rufus rakes the dirt over the ground. "Where are you gonna look?" he asked and Bobby rests on shovel to look at Rufus. "Scotland. Crowley let slip that he likes Craig. It's, uh -" Bobby said and Rufus stops raking. "It's Scotch. Only made and sold in a tiny area on the north tip of Caithness county. It's peaty and sharp, with a long finish of citrus and tobacco notes." Rufus said then he goes back to raking as Bobby stares at him.
Rufus notices and stops. "Hey, what? What am I, a heathen?" Rufus asked as he throws out his arms. "I know what Craig is." he said. "Well, I got a hunch that that's where Crowley lived and died back when he was a human, a few hundred years before he got the big squeeze in hell and came out a demon." Bobby said.
"You know I've got contacts over there. I could make a few calls." Rufus said before he starts to rake again. "Well, I ain't askin' for no help." Bobby said. "I ain't askin' for your permission." Rufus said then he and Bobby smooth over the dirt.
Later, Bobby is about to cut a piece of the cobbler when the phone rings. He puts down the knife and walks over to the phone. "Yeah." he said. "What's another way to kill a Lamia?" Dean asked him. "Well, what happened to the silver knife blessed by a priest?" Bobby asked and Dean looks down at the dead priest by his feet.
"That didn't pan out. What's plan B?" Dean asked while (y/n), Ben and Peyton were being tossed into some pillars and Dean winches. "Dean." (y/n) said, in pain, before she is pulled away from the pillar.
Bobby is looking in a book and he hears knocking on the front door. "Police!" a voice calls out. "Balls!" Bobby growls. "Come on Bobby, get the lead out!" Dean said, quickly, and Bobby looks through the book. "Where are you?" he asked. "In a church. In a rectory." Dean replied.
"Is there a kitchen?" Bobby asked him. "Yeah." Dean said. "Find salt..." Bobby said and Dean starts scoping out the kitchen listening to Bobby with the creature's growls in the background. "...and rosemary." Bobby said then he raises his head at the pounding at his door.
"Open up, Singer!" The voice demanded and Claire and Ryder come down the stairs, both of them looking scared. "Uncle Bobby?" Ryder asked. "Stay upstairs kids!" Bobby whisper yells at them.
Ben is being tossed around in the kitchen while Dean, still on the phone with Bobby, searches the cabinets for salt and rosemary. (y/n) and Peyton try to fight the monster but to no avail.
At Bobby's front door is Sheriff Jody Mills and a man. Bobby, still on the phone, opens the door and the man flashes an FBI badge at him as the two kids head back upstairs. "Mr. Singer. I'm Agent Adams." Adams said then he puts away his badge. "I believe you know Sheriff Mills." he said while Dean is still searching the kitchen cabinets.
Bobby gestures that he will be with Agent Adams and Sheriff Mills in a moment. "My mom. Just a sec." Bobby said and he turns to walk into the study. Dean is still looking in the cabinets and he gets excited.
"Rosemary!" he shouts as the creature growls. "I got it!" Dean exclaims while Agent Adams and Sheriff Mills follow Bobby into the house.
"Great, great. Now blend the herbs..." Bobby instructs and Dean begins pouring the salt into a bowl. "...saute over a high heat...Cook well." Bobby said and Dean drops his phone and tosses the mix at the Lamia, making it screech in pain. Bobby listens to the screams over the phone.
Dean is pulling the stove away from the wall. The Lamia tosses Ben, Peyton and (y/n) hard into a corner. "Guys!" Dean shouts and he tries to light his lighter. Finally, it clicks. "Fire in the hole!" Dean shouts and uses the gas line as a makeshift flamethrower and aims it at the Lamia. The teens and (y/n) shield themselves in the corner. The creature's screams are heard.
"Okay. Great. Great. Enjoy the roast, Mom." Bobby said and he hangs up the phone and turns to see Agent Adams and Sheriff Mills standing behind him. Adams holds up a sketch in his hand. "Have you seen this man? Rufus Turner, aka Luther Vandros, aka Ruben Studdard." Adams asked. "No, I've never seen that dick." Bobby said, plainly.
"How do you know he's a dick?" Adams asked. "Lucky guess." Bobby said, shrugging, and Jody rolls her eyes. "Funny. 'Cause I got a couple of guys working the highway said they saw him pull in here. Carrying a body." Adams said, accusingly. "Well, that's ridiculous. Look, it's a workday, I gotta..." Bobby said but Adams speaks over him.
"I just want to take a look around." he said and Bobby takes two steps in Agent Adams' direction. "You got a warrant, sonny?" Bobby asked and Adams walks forward to be in Bobby's face. "Well, do I need one, sir?" he asked and the two stare at each other.
Then Jody comes up and pats both men on the chest. "Okay fellas, put the rulers away. Zip up." she said then she turns to Agent Adams. "Look, Bobby here is a kind of a..." she said as she looks at Bobby for the right word. "...crank. And he ain't what you call a fan of big brother, but me and him -" she said to Adams then she turns to Bobby again.
"How long I been arresting you now? Eighteen years?" she asked him. "Thereabouts." Bobby replied and Jody smirks then she turns to Adams. "Yeah, we got a history, so...what do you say just let me scope the place out? That okay? You could just wait outside." She said and Adams looks at her then turns for the door. "Five minutes." he said and Jody watches Agent Adams go outside.
Then she turns back to Bobby. "Why did you send him outside?" Bobby asked her. "'Cause I didn't think you'd want him in here." Jody said. "I don't. I've got a body in the basement." Bobby said. "My point." Jody said. "Yeah, but I've got another body buried in the yard." Bobby said and Jody's eyes get wide. "Damn it." she groans.
"And I got two kids upstairs." Bobby said and Jody looks at him. "What?" She asked. "Remember Dean and (y/n)?" Bobby asked her and she nods. "It's their kids." He said and Jody sighs then she goes to the front door to look outside, then looks at Bobby. "He's not there." She said. "Balls!" Bobby sighs, irritatingly.
Jody and Bobby walk outside and find Agent Adams. "Mr. Singer, come with me, please." Adams said and Bobby and Jody exchange a look, then follow Agent Adams. Agent Adams stops in front of a now empty hole where Rufus and Bobby buried the Okami.
"Do you mind explaining this?" Adams asked Bobby. "What, you never had a septic tank explode on you? I got it pretty well cleaned up, but watch where you step." Bobby tells him and Agent Adams checks the bottom of his shoes.
That night, Rufus is driving while on the phone with Bobby. "Get back here!" Bobby growls at him. "Get back - I'm two states over, Bobby. I can't." Rufus said as Bobby carries a large bag. "The Okami ain't dead." Bobby said. "Of course it is." Rufus said while Bobby pulls various knives out of a bag.
"Did you use a bamboo dagger?" Bobby asked. "Yeah." Rufus said. "Blessed by a Shinto priest?" Bobby asked. "I'm not an imbecile, Bobby." Rufus said, defensively. "Did you stab it seven times?" Bobby asked and there was a pause.
"Five times." Rufus said. "It's seven!" Bobby said, exasperated. "No, I'm pretty sure it's five." Rufus said. "Well, clearly it's seven times. The damn hole is empty." Bobby ed then he sighs as Rufus sits there. "What was it feeding on when you found it?" he asked. "Single white females -While they slept." Rufus replied and Bobby has an oh, no look on his face.
Marcy is getting ready to go to bed as closes an open window and locks it. She turns to go down the hall as a figure quickly passes the window. Marcy locks the front door as something watches from the kitchen. She has just walked away from the door when Bobby kicks in the door.
"Bobby?" She screamed. "Where's your bedroom?" Bobby asked, out of breath. Marcy, still in shock, points the way and Bobby runs down the hall. Bobby pushes open the door and checks under the bed.
As Bobby continues searching the room, Marcy walks in. "Bobby, I'm trying to keep my cool but, what are you doing in my house with a shotgun?" she asked and Bobby stops searching to look at Marcy. "Have you seen anything...weird?" Bobby asked her and she raises her eyebrows. "You mean besides you?" she asked, sarcastically.
Marcy's eyes wander up to the corner of the ceiling and she gasps. Bobby follows her gaze to the corner behind him and the Okami pounces on him and wrestles with Bobby then tosses him out the window. The Okami then turns to Marcy, who quickly backs out of the room, closing the door.
The Okami goes out the same window Bobby did just as Bobby gets up when the Okami rushes him and knocks him back down. Bobby gets up and the Okami lunges at him again, but Bobby sidesteps and it crashes into a tree. He tries to keep it pinned against the tree but the Okami punches him and he flies backwards.
He hits the wood chipper and powers it up by accident. The Okami attacks again. The two wrestle near the blades as Marcy comes running outside. "Bobby, no! Look out!" she screams and Bobby knees the Okami and rolls out from under her.
Bobby shoves the Okami toward the blades and blood and flesh start to come out of the other end of the wood chipper...where Marcy is standing. Bobby is hit with some of the blood as the rest of the Okami is shredded. Bobby then walks towards the controls to turn off the wood chipper and sees Marcy.
"I, uh - I thought your chipper was broke." he asked her as she stands there, covered in blood and in shock. "I just said that to get you over here." she said and Bobby pauses. "Oh. Well, I guess I could come over for dinner some night. Might be fun." Bobby said, hopeful. "I don't think so." Marcy said, shaking her head, and has an figures look and nods. "Story of my life." he said, exasperated.
Later, Bobby is back on the phone with Rufus. "You're still alive, huh." Rufus said, impressed. "Don't act so surprised." Bobby said as Rufus is parked in front of a diner while talking to Bobby.
"How about Godzilla?" Rufus asked. "Put her down." Bobby said as he goes upstairs, opens the bedroom door and sees Claire and Ryder sleeping in the bed, Ace laying on the edge of the bed and looks up at Bobby.
"So you just happened to have a bamboo dagger blessed by a Shinto priest laying around?" Rufus asked. "Wood chipper." Bobby said as he goes and pets Ace. "Oh, okey dokey. Wood chipper, that - that pretty much trumps everything." Rufus said and Bobby scoffs a bit then nods.
"Look, listen, Bobby, thank you. I screwed up." Rufus said as Bobby leaves the bedroom and shuts the door. "Forget it. I figure -I still owe you more than you owe me." Bobby said and Rufus is taken aback by Bobby's words. "Alrighty, then add one more thing to the list. I got a lead on your boy Crowley." Rufus said and Bobby heads downstairs and grabs a pencil and paper.
"AKA -Fergus Roderick MacLeod. Born in Canisbay, Scotland, 1661." Rufus said. "Great. I don't know what that's gonna get me." Bobby said. "Alright -Well, then, behind door number 2, Bob, Crowley had a son." Rufus said and this catches Bobby's interest.
"Did he now?" Bobby said, interested. "Yeah, by the name of Gavin. Moved across the pond when his parents bit it. Captained a trading ship -that went down in Massachusetts in 1723. Couple of Cousteau wannabes found the wreck about 30 years ago." Rufus explains.
"They fish out his bones?" Bobby asked him. "No. No. They did find his signet ring though. It's part of the Treasures from the Deep exhibit at the Maritime Museum at Andover." Rufus said. "I need that ring." Bobby said and Rufus widens his eyes.
"Oooh. Oooh Are you, um - you askin' for my help, Bob?" Rufus asked him and Bobby looks at the phone like he wishes he could strangle it. "Bobby?" Rufus asked. "I'm asking for a ring. And - I'd appreciate your help getting it." Bobby said, irritated, and Rufus chuckles.
"I'm way ahead of you, brother. I'm headed for Andover now. I should be there about midnight. You're, um...you're thinking hostage exchange, aren't you? I mean, you get the ring, you can summon Junior's ghost. Get the ghost, you can swap Crowley his son for your soul." Rufus said. "Something like that." Bobby said. "Let's hope that works out." Bobby said and he hangs up then starts to make some breakfast.
"Okay, who would like some cobbler." Bobby asked the kids as they sit at the table, later that day. "Me!" The kids said and Bobby smiles alittle at this and begins to cut up some cobbler between him and the kids.
He hands out the cobbler to the kids and they begin to eat it when Bobby's phone rings. Bobby puts down his fork and pulls out his to see the caller ID says John P. Jones. "Oh, it's your dad." Bobby said to the kids and they look up at him, their eyes shining brightly at this.
"Dean. You alright?" Bobby asked him. "Yeah. Yeah, the Lamia grilled up fine." Dean said, tiredly. "I sense a but coming on." Bobby said as the kids look over at Bobby with worry. "It's just..." Dean stops and sighs. "Bobby, am I becoming my dad?" He asked.
"What?" Bobby said, surprised. "Am I becoming Dad?" Dean asked, again, and Bobby sighs. "Dean, you are nothing like your dad." Bobby assures. "But I'm going out hunting and leaving my kids behind. I mean, call me crazy, but that sounds alot like my dad." Dean said just as Bobby hears the other line beeping and checks the caller ID.
"Dean." Bobby said but Dean continues. "Not to mention, Sam would be pissed at me for not sticking to the normal life like (y/n) and I had promised him." Dean said as he looks into the window of the motel room, seeing (y/n) patching up Ben and Peyton as he stands outside of the motel room.
"Dean. I got another call." Bobby said. "You what?" Dean said, annoyed. "Just hang on. I got take this. It's important." Bobby tells him and Dean laughs, humorlessly. "More important than what I'm feeling?" Dean asked then he hears a click on the line. "Bobby?" He said as Bobby listens to the other line, where he can hear sirens over the phone.
"Rufus?" Bobby asked as Rufus is driving very fast with police sirens and lights flashing behind him. "The good news is I snagged the ring, Bobby. However..." Rufus said and Bobby's eyes widen. "Tell me that ain't -" Bobby said before Rufus speaks up.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Three guesses and one of them - it ain't the paramedics." Rufus said as Bobby listens helplessly. "Listen, Bobby. Bobby, I gotta stash this ring." Rufus said. "Well, don't swallow it." Bobby yells. "Right! I'm swallowing it, Bobby!" Rufus said and he swallows the ring. "Don't swallow it!" Bobby yells again then he can hear Rufus swallowing, then drinking something.
"Damn it." Bobby groans as Rufus sighs. "Oh, hell." Rufus said as Bobby hears another voice. "Hands where I can see them!" a commanding male voice shouts. "Whoa, whoa, whoa! That is unnecessary force! I know my rights!" Rufus yells and Bobby hangs up on Rufus and clicks back to Dean.
"Still there, Dean?" Bobby asked him. "Bobby, what the hell?" Dean asked, angrily, while Bobby looks annoyed. "I, uh - sorry." Bobby said as Dean begins to pace. "You know you are the one person that I can talk to about this stuff, about leaving Claire and Ryder. I mean I don't -I don't even know which way is up right now." Dean said but Bobby doesn't say anything.
"Bobby?" Dean asked as Bobby is staring off into the distance. "Hello?" Dean asked as the kids look over at Bobby. "Uncle Bobby?" Claire and Ryder said, worried, and Bobby shakes his head. "I - I hear you, son. I - it just ain't a good time." Bobby said into the phone and Dean scoffs.
"Yeah, okay. You know what - Forget it. I mean I'm baring my soul like a freaking girl here and, uh - And you've got stuff to do. So that is - that's fine. That's fine but, seriously, a little selfish. Not all about you." Dean growls and from hearing this, Bobby gets angry and leans forward in his chair.
"Where's your wife?" Bobby asked, angrily, and Dean makes a face like why do you ask. "Inside the motel room." Dean replied. "Get her." Bobby growls.
"Kids, go upstairs." Bobby tells the kids and they head upstairs to their rooms, but they stopped at the stairs and listen. Bobby pours himself a drink as Dean fetches (y/n) and they go and sit in the Impala.
"You're on speaker, Bobby." Dean tells him. "(Y/n). Dean. I love you like my own. I do. But sometimes -" Bobby said then he pauses and takes a long drink. "Sometimes...You two are the whiniest, most self-absorbed sons of bitches I ever met! I'm selfish? Me? I do everything for you! Everything! You need some lores scrounged up. You need your asses pulled out of the fire. You need someone to bitch to about each other. You need someone to watch the kids while you guys go out and save the world..." Bobby said while (y/n) looks at Dean, puzzled.
"What did you say to him?!" (Y/n) whispered-yelled at Dean as Bobby continues. "You call me and I come through. Every damn time! And what do I get for it? Jack with a side of squat!" Bobby yells. Claire and Ryder look at each other, surprised that someone was yelling at their parents the way Bobby was doing.
"Bobby -" Dean said but Bobby yells. "Do I sound like I'm done?"
Dean and (y/n) jump a bit at this and share a look. "Now look. I know you've got issues." Bobby said as he paces the room. "God knows I know. But I got a news flash for you. You ain't the center of the universe! Now, it may have slipped your mind that Crowley owns my soul! And the meter is running! And I will be damned if I'm going to sit around...And - and be damned! So how about you two sack up and help me for once?" Bobby yells as the kids exchange confused looks.
Dean looks very humbled and (y/n) very worried. "Bobby, all - all you got to do is ask." (Y/n) said to him. "Anything you need...we're there." Dean said and Bobby, still cooling off, shakes his head.
The next day, Bobby is leaning on a car, arms crossed, waiting. Jody drives up, puts the patrol car in park and turns off the engine. "I got a call from Marcy Wards. Seems she had a little home invasion? Told her I'd look into it." she said then she smiles. "Didn't bother filing a report." She said.
"Thanks." Bobby said then he takes a deep breath. "I need a favor." He said. "Luther Vandros show up? Tell him I'm a fan." Jody tells him. "His real name is Rufus Turner. He's being held in Andover, Mass., on a burglary charge. I need you to get him extradited here." Bobby said. "Extradited? Extradited for what?" Jody asked. "Murder." Bobby said and Jody laughs but sees that Bobby is not joking.
"You're not joking?" she asked and Bobby shakes his head. "Do you have any idea what it takes to extradite a prisoner? I'd need a court order, permission from the DA...I -I would have to call in every marker I've got and hand out a few to boot." she said. "So you're saying there's a chance." Bobby said, questioning. "And if by some miracle we can get him here, then what? Then your pal's here on a murder charge. How are you gonna get him out from under that one?" Jody asked.
"Let me handle the B side." Bobby said and Jody laughs. "I like you, Bobby." she said and Bobby lowers his head a bit. "But this could nuke my career." she adds and Bobby sighs. "Look, I've done a lot for this town. Some you know about. Some you don't. And I'm not real good at this whole asking for help thing but -" Bobby said and Jody shakes her head.
"I'm sorry, Bobby. I can't." she said and she starts the patrol car and drives off.
Hours later, Bobby pours himself a drink and he and the kids were about to play some card game when he hears knocking on the door. Bobby opens the door to see Jody with Rufus. "Miss me?" Rufus asked him and he walks into Bobby's kitchen. Bobby looks in shock at Jody.
"How did you -" Bobby started to ask but Jody shakes her head. "Don't ask. You got one hour, then I call the feds and tell them he busted out." she said. "Thanks." Bobby tells her, gratefully. "I lose my job over this, I am taking it out of your ass!" Jody threatens and she leaves as Bobby nods to himself. Bobby then turns his attention to Rufus, who is looking around the kitchen then looks at the kids.
"These the rugrats you've been watching over?" Rufus asked as he gestures to the kids. "Yes. Please tell me the ring is still in your stomach." Bobby said and Rufus fishes in his pants pocket and produces the ring for Bobby. Bobby looks at the ring. "I'll go boil some water." he said as he walks off. "What?" Rufus asked.
Later, Bobby pours a circle of salt and appears to be performing a summoning spell. "Amate spiritus oscorte tae quadaramos aramos nobiscume quarde ahpule nos chikitara." he recites and he throws something at a candle that makes the flame flare high. Bobby can soon see his breath in front of him and there is a ghost flickering to his right.
Bobby slowly turns to look at the spirit. "Gavin MacLeod?" he asked. "Yes." Gavin replied then he looks around. "Is - is this hell?" He asked. "That's gonna depend on you." Bobby said and Gavin stares at him. "You Fergus MacLeod's boy?" Bobby asked and Gavin nods. "You and me...we're gonna have a nice long chat." Bobby said.
Sometime later, Bobby is performing another summoning ritual. This time Crowley shows up and he looks very annoyed. "Well, you look like hammered crap." Bobby said. "And you're a vision as always." Crowley said, sarcastically. Bobby and Crowley look each other over, then Crowley looks up to see that he is standing beneath a devil's trap.
"Don't we both know how this game ends? Really Bobby, you gotta know when to fold 'em." Crowley said, exasperated. "Word on the street is that ever since Lucifer went to the pokey, you're the big kahuna downstairs." Bobby said and Crowley looks at him, impressed. "I see you've been reading the trades." he said.
"Trouble in Paradise?" Bobby asked him. "Mate. You...have no idea." Crowley said as he gets a glass and pours a drink he has brought himself. "I thought...when I got the corner office..." Crowley explains as he drops some antacid in the drink. "I thought it was all going to be rainbows and two-headed puppies." he said and he turns to look at Bobby. "But, if I'm being honest, it's been hell." he said and he takes a drink.
"I thought that was the point." Bobby said as Crowley finishes his drink and puts the glass on the table. "You know what the problem with demons is?" Crowley asked him. "They're demons." Bobby said, plainly. "Exactly. Evil lying prats. The whole lot of them. And stupid. Try to show them a - a new way, a better way. And what do you get? Bugger all. You know, there's days that I think Lucifer's whole Spike anything with black eyes plan wasn't half bad. Hmm. Feels good to get it off my chest. We should make this a thing." Crowley said.
"Do I look like Dr. Phil to you?" Bobby asked, sarcastically. "A little." said Crowley and Bobby gives him a dirty look. "Anyhoo. Obviously not here for a social call. So on with it." he said. "I want -" Bobby said but Crowley grunts to interrupt and puts up his hand. "Save you the recap. In fact I'll do the shorthand for you." Crowley said and he points at Bobby and speaks in a mock Bobby voice. "I want my soul back, idjit." He mocks then points at self. "'Fraid not." He said then he points at Bobby and speaks in mock voice. "But I'm surly and I got a beard. Gimme! Blah, blah, blah. Homespun cornpone insult, witty retort from yours truly. The bottom line is, you get bubkes. Are we done?" He asked.
"Just getting started." Bobby said then he looks over to his left and Gavin appears. Crowley looks startled as he looks at Gavin, then Bobby and back to Gavin. "Gavin?" Crowley said, shocked, as Gavin stares at Crowley. "Is that you? It - it's been so long." Crowley said as Gavin continues to stare. "I love you so -" Crowley said but he can no longer pretend and laughs.
"Sorry. Your soul for my boy, is that it, right? I've got to give you credit for thinking outside the box on that one, but - problem is...I loathe the little bastard. You want to torture him, just let me pull up a chair and watch. Hell, burn his bones and send him down to me and we can have a family reunion. That right, son? You picked the wrong bargaining chip this time, my friend." Crowley said.
"He ain't a chip." Bobby said and Crowley looks confused. "I was just using him to dig up dirt on you. And since Gavin hates you maybe even more than you hate him, he was more than happy to squawk." Bobby said and Crowley looks at Gavin. "What did you tell him, son?" he asked and Gavin smiles wickedly. "Everything." he replied and he looks very satisfied then flickers out.
Bobby then walks towards Crowley. "I know it all now. Fergus. You may be king of the dirt bags here but, in life, you were nothing but a two-bit tailor who sold his soul in exchange for an extra three inches below the belt." Bobby said. "Just trying to hit double digits." Crowley said and Bobby smiles at him.
"So, you got a glimpse behind the curtain. And?" Crowley asked. "And - now I know where you're planted." Bobby said and he picks up a cell phone and tosses it at Crowley. Crowley puts the phone to his ear.
"Hiya, Crowley." Dean greets. "Dean. It's been a long time. We should get together." Crowley said. "Sure. We'll have to do that when I get back." Dean said. "Back?" Crowley asked, confused. "Yeah. Me and (y/n) - we've gone international. In fact, we're in your neck of the woods." Dean said as he and (y/n) stand by an open grave.
Crowley looks upset. "Did you really use to wear a skirt?" Dean asked him. "A kilt. I had very athletic calves. What's the game?" Crowley asked. "Dominoes. In fact we just dug yours up." Dean said as he and (y/n) look down at a pile of bones.
Crowley then looks to Bobby. "This is ridiculous. The whole burning bones thing - it's a myth." he said. "I know an employee of yours who would disagree." Bobby said and he explained what happened.
"That's where she got to." Crowley grumbles. "You demons. You think you're something special. But you're just spirits. Twisted, perverted, evil spirits. But, end of the day, you're nothing but ghosts with an ego." Bobby said as Crowley has his jaw set. "We torch your bones, you go up in flames." Bobby said as Crowley hears Dean clicking his lighter.
"You hear that, Crowley?" Dean asked and Crowley looks down at the phone. "That's me flicking my Bic for you." Dean said and (y/n) shakes her head. "Your bones for my soul. Going once..." Bobby said as Crowley hears Dean playing with the lighter. "Going twice." Bobby said and Crowley tosses the phone to the ground.
"Bollocks." Crowley said, exasperated, and he raises his hand palm to reveal the contract on Bobby's arms, he then turns his hand over and in a wiping motion begins to erase the contract. "You can go ahead and leave in the part about my legs." Bobby said and Crowley rolls his eyes, but does as he is told. The rest of the contract disappears.
"Pleasure doing business with you." Bobby said, smiling. "Now if you don't mind." Crowley said as his gaze goes up to the devil's trap over his head.
Meanwhile, in Scotland, (y/n) and Dean were still standing over Crowley's bones. Crowley appears behind them carrying a bag. "I believe those are mine." Crowley said and the couple turn to him. "You know, now that I think about it, maybe I'll just napalm your ass anyhow." Dean threatened as he clicks his lighter.
Crowley just looks at Dean as (y/n) extinguishes the flame of the lighter in Dean's hand. "Dean, he's a dick, but a deal's a deal." (y/n) tells him and Crowley walks past them. "I don't need you fight my battles for me, Vixen. Get bent." Crowley growls and (y/n) scoffs.
Crowley inspects the bones as he puts them in the bag, then rises to look at (y/n) and Dean. "Now, if you'll excuse me. I've a little hell to raise." Crowley said said and he disappears.
"I appreciate you two lending a hand." Bobby said. "Hey, any time we get to punk Crowley works for us." Dean said as he and (y/n) driving down the road of Scotland. "Yeah." (y/n) said. "Still, knowing how much you love flying the friendly skies, I guess a nine hour plane trip was no picnic. What did you do, drink your way through it?" Bobby asked them.
"I was fine." Dean said and (y/n) scoffs out a laugh. "No, he white knuckled his way through four puke bags." she said. "But at least I was sober. If some nutjob decided to try something, I was ready. I had a fork." said Dean and Bobby laughs.
"Hey, Ben and Peyton should be there to pick up the kids tomorrow." (Y/n) said and Bobby nods. "Listen. Um - about the things I said earlier. I was in a tough spot and I - I guess I was -" Bobby said but (y/n) interrupts him. "You were right, Bobby. We take you for granted." (y/n) said. "You've been cleaning up our messes for years, Bobby. Without you, I don't even want to think about where we would've ended up." Dean said and (y/n) nods in agreement.
Bobby is silent for a moment before he speaks. "Okay then, let's roll credits on this chick flick. You two have a safe flight. And, uh -Try some of the local grub, I hear it's...exotic." Bobby said. "Oh yeah, no, definitely. We are. I hear they have an Olive Garden." Dean said and (y/n) chuckles.
Bobby rolls his eyes. "Also, when you guys get back, you two should enjoy the rest of the summer with your kids. They really miss you." Bobby said and Dean and (y/n) share a look. "You know that doesn't sound like a bad idea." (Y/n) said and Dean nods. "Good." Bobby said and he hangs up the phone.
Bobby starts to eat on the cobbler when he hears footsteps and sees Ryder and Claire coming in. "Kids, what are you two doing up? You should be in bed." Bobby said and they come up to him.
"Uncle Bobby, what do Mom and Dad actually do?" Claire asked him and Bobby seemed taken aback by this. "We overheard you yelling at them yesterday." Claire said and Bobby looks down. "Kids, I uh...I'm really not supposed to say..." Bobby stammers but the kids give him this pleading look.
"We're tired of the secrets, Uncle Bobby." Claire said. "Yeah, we just want to know. Who's Crowley? And what did you mean when you said Mom and Dad are saving the world?" Ryder asked and Bobby sighs at this.
"Okay, kids. I'll tell you what is happening. But you two gotta promise me not to tell your parents that I told you." Bobby said. "Why?" They asked him. "Because what I'm about to tell you is something your parents are trying to protect you from and not turn out how they did when they were your age." Bobby said.
"What is it?" Claire asked and Bobby gives them worried looks before he goes in to explain everything.