Being in the 141 didn't give us a big window for personal time. Very rarely did we get to take a nap or have a nice meal at a restaurant. Hell we never had time to even go out for a drink.
So when we got back from our last mission I was frustrated, exhausted, and anxious that my plan wouldn't work. It wouldn't even take that long. Less than an hour even.
"(Y/n) are you sure-" Gaz started. They all had been asking me if I was okay over and over. The question was making me feel less okay.
"I said I'm fine." I snapped. Price shot me a look. Gaz didn't deserve my anger he was just concerned.
But I was fine. I was alive, so of course I was fine. Or at least I would be fine if everyone could just shut up and let me do my own thing.
When the plane landed I stomped off. I didn't even care to properly put my gear away, instead just throwing it in the designated room and sulking off to my room.
When I made it to my isolated area I slammed the door shut and just stood there, breathing heavily.
"God fucking dammit!" I shouted. I began throwing whatever was in my reach. Whatever I had on my desk fell to the ground. Glass in picture frames cracked due to the impact against the wall. The sheet on my bed ripped as I screamed.
When there was nothing else for me to trash I panted and stared at the destruction. Fuck. Everything was wrong it was all too much. No. It wouldn't happen again. I wouldn't let it.
I dug through the pile of shit until I found the scissors. I grabbed them and pushed my door open, stomping down the hall to the communal bathroom.
Using a random cup I filled it with water and soaked my hair. I stared at myself in the mirror.
—- —- —-
I was our teams best sniper. It was a well known fact. My job was to be the eyes in the sky. To watch over my team.
"Targets to your left Captain." I said over the coms. I watched through my scope as Price nodded. He gave some sort of acknowledgment and thanks before dealing with the situation.
"Soap watch your-" I was cut off by a sharp pull of my hair. I let out a small shout as whoever was behind me yanked my hair pulling me back from my gun.
I could hear my team shouting my name over the radio as I struggled to get free. Shit. I struggled, trying my best to ignore the pain as he tugged and pulled at my hair. I quickly knocked his gun from his hand and it slid to the ledge of the roof.
I was panicking. The thing I was trained to not do. Only I wasn't as good in hand to hand combat as I was with my shooting accuracy.
"Get off me." I grunted as I pushed him. He was saying something but I wasn't listening. I was focused on getting free. My team needed me.
The struggle continued for much longer than it should have and eventually the man let go of my hair and wrapped his hands around my throat. I tried to kick and push him but it wasn't working. I was choking and my lungs were screaming for air.
I was going to die.
But I didn't. The sick crack of his neck snapping sounded before I noticed who was behind him. The enemy's body slumped forward and laid on me for only a minute before Ghost pulled him off me. I gasped for air and though he didn't say anything, Ghost comforted me until I was breathing normally again.
—- —- —-
My reflection stared back at me. I could see the anger and disappointment in myself. The image of the man flickered through my mind. "Fuck you." I spat at the mirror.
I picked the scissors up and started cutting.
I had cut my own hair before but never like this. Long strands of hair fell in the sink and to the floor. I thinned out the edges and when I finished I stared at myself. A drastic change, but a needed one.
Just above my shoulders. Short. No one would be able to use my hair against me now.
I sighed and cleaned up my mess. I made my way back to my room. Shit. I did a number on this place. I began to clean up my other mess and when I finally finished I realized it was time for dinner.
I left my room and walked to the mess hall. A few recruits watched me, observing my new haircut. I walked through the doorway and grabbed my meal before taking it to where my team was.
"Woah." Soap said. "I like the new look."
"Thanks." I mumbled.
"Looks like a professional did it. Did you do it yourself?" He continued.
"Yeah."
"Mind doing my hair sometime?" He asked me.
I looked up at him and blinked. His hair had grown out a bit. The shaved parts of his Mohawk were no longer finely shaved. I looked at Gaz and Price as well. Their hair had grown out as well and they were looking a bit disheveled.
"You all could do with a bit of a refresher." I mumbled. "Price, I think the mustache needs a bit of a clean up."
He shot me a look that said 'if you fuck this up you'll be dealing with the new recruits for the next month.'
"We do have a couple days until we move." Price said.
—- —- —-
Price was first. I his hair was easy but it was the mustache that gave me anxiety. I was careful to not fuck it up and when I finished he gave me a nod of approval.
Soap practically skipped inside the bathroom. He sat in the chair and I turned on the clippers. I shaved the outgrown hair as he chatted away. When I finished shaving the sides I brought out the scissors and trimmed the actual hairdo.
He thanked me profusely and said that he'd be happy to cut my hair sometime.
"Absolutely not Soap. Don't come near me with scissors. Ever."
"Alright. Your loss. I bet I'm pretty good at styling hair." He grinned before walking out.
Gaz walked in and he looked a bit nervous. He handed me some hair products that he liked and as I worked he led me through the entire process.
He was very particular with his hair care routine. I knew he had an intense skin care routine, so I expected nothing less for his hair.
He walked me through how to put proper braids in his hair. When I finished he carefully examined the look in the mirror. I waited anxiously for him to tell me it looked like shit.
"Not bad for your first time. Actually, lot better than my sister does and she's been doing it since I was a kid." He smiled at me. I let out a breath I had been holding in.
"I'll work on it. Practice so it gets better if you want me to do it again. Maybe you teach me how to do some other hairdos too?"
"Yeah of course. No one I'd trust besides myself to do my hair." He chuckled. I smiled and sent him on his way.
I started to clean up the mess of hair that littered the floor. I hummed as I cleaned.
"Fuck!" I jumped when I turned around to see Ghost standing in the doorway.
"Sorry." He mumbled.
I waved him off. "It's okay. Just startled me. Been a bit on edge since the mission." I admitted. "Need something?" I asked.
He nodded. I shot him a questioning look as he moved in and shut the door. I heard the lock click and moved slowly to sit in the chair.
"Cut my hair?" He asked.
"Oh. Uh, Ghost you don't need to get your hair cut just because everyone else is." I told him.
"No. I need a cut. It's too long and it's uncomfortable in the mask. Distracting." He admitted.
"Okay." I whispered. "I, um, are you sure you're okay with me seeing your face? I can't exactly cut your hair if the mask is on. I can see if the medics will let us take one of their surgeon masks but I'll have to run across base to-" I started to ramble.
Ghost didn't say anything and instead answered my question by pulling the mask up and off his head.
My jaw tightened as I looked down. It felt weird. I felt like I was intruding on his privacy.
"You have to look to do my hair." He reiterated my point from moments ago.
I nodded before looking up. I tried not to stare, but there was a part of me that wanted, needed, to memorize every little detail.
"Blonde." I mumbled. He looked at me through the reflection of the mirror. "I didn't expect you to be blonde. I like it."
His eyes watched my every move as I trimmed the grown out hair.
"How short do you want it."
"Short. Don't wanna feel it in the mask."
I nodded and went back to work. It wasn't a hard or long task, but an unconscious part of me worked slowly so I could spend more time with him like this.
Little was said, but that's how it usually was with him.
I moved around to the front and gently guided his head to where I needed it.
"Thank you." I said. "I never said that yesterday. You saved my ass. You saved my life."
Ghost hummed. "It's what we do. We have each other's back. You've saved me more times than I can count."
I smiled and chuckled. "Did you get shit for breaking protocol?" I asked. He wasn't supposed to come after me if something like that happens. Protocol dictates that ground agents keep moving and I deal with the problem on my own or the problem deals with me. They aren't supposed to abandon formation no matter what.
"A bit." He told me.
"I'm sorry." I apologized.
"It was my choice." He told me. "I was scared."
I paused. Ghost? Scared? I never imagined him to be scared of anything. "You were scared?"
He hummed again. "Didn't want to loose another person I cared about." He said quietly.
I couldn't help the heat that burned my cheeks. I finished the haircut and examined my work. I smiled. "There you go, handsome."
He looked at himself in the mirror for a moment before looking at me. He put his mask back on and stood up from the chair. I looked at the skull painted on the black cloth and tried hard to remember what his face looked like. There was only a ghost of an image that stuck in my head.
"Feel okay?" I asked.
He nodded. He stood there for a moment, just looking at me. He took a step forward and lifted the mask up just slightly over his nose. He planted a small gentle kiss to my cheek. "Thank you."
When he pulled back I looked in his eyes. There was something there I had never noticed before. Something soft and warm.
My heart felt like it was going to burst out of my chest right then and there.
I opened my mouth. I wanted to say something. Anything. But I couldn't think of a single thing.
"I like your new hair. Suits you. Very pretty." He said. I could tell he was smiling under his mask.
"Thank you."
"Come on. Price wants a debrief in an hour." He told me. I nodded and followed as he held my hand, leading me through the base.
—- —- —-
"No way." Soap said as we walked into the debrief room. Price looked between Ghost and I as if he had known the whole time.
"Did you cut his hair?" Soap said coming up to me. I nodded. "Oh coke on. You know what he looks like? You gotta tell me. What's he look like?" He asked. He continued to question me about Ghosts appearance.
"Johnny." Ghost said getting Soap to quiet down. "That's enough."
Soap looked at me with a pleading face.
"He's very handsome." Was all I said.
"What?! No that's not enough! Come on. Tell me more. Give me the details!"
Price shook his head. "Let's get started."