XXXVI. I AM SO GODDAMN ALONE
"finally," jj sighed as kie and pope pulled up to the end of the dock. "hey! guys, don't tie up. stop it!"
jj ran ahead of the group down the dock.
"what?" kie's brow creased in confusion.
"we're dipping," jj said as he hopped in.
"wait, why?" pope asked.
"what? what are you talking about?" kie said.
"i got it," sarah insisted as john b and briar helped her down onto the boat.
"what happened last night?" john b said, slightly upset.
"we slept on the break. what's up?" pope looked around in confusion.
"slept, right. yeah," jj pat pope on the shoulder. "we were up all night."
"yeah, fucking crazy people," briar huffed as sarah leaned against her.
"we gotta get the hell out of here," john b tossed his backpack onto the boat.
"rafe knows we're here," sarah informed. "so we have to leave, like, now."
"okay," kie nodded and began to undo the boat ties.
"come on," pope helped briar onto the boat.
"you all right?" john b asked sarah.
"yeah, yeah," she panted.
🃏
"look, if rafe and barry know, it's only a matter of time," kie said as the teens settled down.
"before everyone knows," pope finished.
"i told you!" jj yelled angrily. "we should've just gone south, man."
"just stop it," john b snapped. briar sat on his lap, curled into his side. her hair was starting to curl up in the humidity and her baby hair tickled john b's neck.
"why does no one ever listen?" jj yelled.
"i get it. i get it. i understand," john b said.
"i have an idea," sarah said shakily. "with me back, my dad's going to have to choose between me and rafe."
the pogues heads all snapped up. "sarah, honey, no," briar shook her head."
"he's gonna choose me," sarah said feebly.
"just please listen," john b interrupted. "ward keeps lying to you, sarah."
"sarah, he won't agree after all that's happened," kie shook her head.
"no," sarah said sharply. "i . . . i know it sounds crazy."
"yeah, it does," kie said, getting worked up.
"i know!" sarah yelled. "but he's my dad. and i know him, and i know he loves me. i'm just asking for two hours."
"this could be really stupid," briar stood up from john b's lap. "like, really stupid, sarah."
"no," sarah's voice cracked. "please."
🃏
"hey, there she is!"
briar followed jj and kie down to the beach where john b and pope sat.
"sarah!" kie opened her arms wide.
"you made it," pope smiled.
"look who's back," briar smiled wide.
"what happened?" john b asked. "so how'd it go?"
"you guys were right," sarah said tearfully as jj and kie helped hide the boat. "it didn't work. sorry."
"well, then that settles it, guys," jj began. "now, y'all need to load up in the paddy wagon and get the heck out of dodge right now."
"right, you'll need supplies, and you'll have to split as soon as possible," pope nodded.
"everybody stop!" briar yelled. "i can't fucking lose you again, do you understand that? this is fucking ridiculous. i know we're all concerned for john b and for sarah. but what about me?"
"b," kie began.
"no!" briar's voice cracked. "i am so goddamn alone, all the time. nobody ever thinks about me! it's about ward. it's about the gold. well, i'm sixteen and carrying a little baby girl so i'd really appreciate it if everyone cared about me for once."
"it's a girl?" john b's voice cracked.
briar nodded, tears spilling down her face. "yeah, our little girl."
"nice of you to share that info with me," john b laughed tearfully.
"sorry," briar sniffled into his chest. "i was caught up with you being an illegal."
"my bad," john b breathed into her hair. "my bad."
"this is sweet," kie interrupted. "but i think it's too late."
briar's face paled as she heard sirens rushing in. "they followed you hear?" john b asked sarah angrily. "must've been your father."
"we have to find another way out," pope said urgently.
"stay on the beach with your hands in the air!" a man with a megaphone called from one of the approaching boats.
"go now! go!" pope urged. "run! come on! come on!"
john b and kie wrapped arms around sarah to help her walk, her gunshot would still pounding. tears ran briar's face as she clutched her bump and ran.
"go, go!" john b screamed, voice hoarse as him and briar helped sarah along.
"we're good, we're good," briar comforted sarah as the trio ran behind.
"sarah, you good?" kie hollered back.
"yeah, you okay?" john b responded.
"yeah," sarah nodded.
"go! go! go!" john b continued. the teens tossed themselves into another body of water. jj helped sarah down.
"go! come on!" jj urged as the teens swam across some marsh.
"there are people pointing guns at us!" briar screamed as the teens tossed themselves onto the bank.
"go! get up!" pope helped push briar out of the water.
"behind the tree!" john b ordered as the teens ducked.
"we're trapped. they surrounded us," jj groaned.
"i can't fucking do this," briar panted as she cried.
"what do we do?" pope said feebly.
"no getting out of it," jj gave in. "we gotta make a stand."
he pulled the gun from his pants.
"no!" briar snapped. "you shoot them, they shoot us. and i'm protecting this baby with my fucking life."
john b looked down at his girlfriend. briar valentine was crying and clutching her baby bump, blubbering words of false comfort to her cousin. sarah cameron was crying too, clutching her bandaged gunshot wound tightly. jj cocked the gun.
john b grabbed jj's wrist. he took the gun, tossed it to the ground, and kicked dirt over it. it was over.
"it's gonna be all right," john b said tearfully to jj.
"i love you, bri," he whispered to his girlfriend. "i love both my girls."
"john b!" shoupe pulled his gun. "step out into the clearing! get down. do not move!"
"i'm surrendering!" john b yelled as he stepped forward.
"don't move!" another cop screamed.
"hands up, john b!"
"stay right where you are. keep your hands where we can see them," shoupe ordered.
the pogues all stood, teary eyed, with their hands in the air. briar and sarah's hands were clasped above their heads, showing their defiance, even in the smallest of ways.
"hey, listen, shoupe, i wanna testify," john b yelled over the commotion.
"it's about time. get down," shoupe came closer. "do not move a muscle. everybody else, don't move."
officer thomas walked over to arrest john b. only the man threw him to the floor quickly.
"seriously?" jj yelled.
"hey, thomas!" shoupe yelled.
"stop! let him go!" kie gutturally screamed as thomas pummeled john b.
"stop it! stop it!" briar cried as she screamed. "shoupe, please! fuck! please!"
"sheriff, what is that?" jj screamed. "you're gonna let that happen?"
"don't move!" plumb ordered jj as he tried to step in.
"thomas!" shoupe yelled as he stepped in. he was holding john b by the neck of his shirt.
he muttered something to john b before slamming his fist across a sixteen-year-old boy's face, knocking him to the ground.
"you fucking monster!" briar cried loudly. "what the fuck is wrong with you?"
she cried loud and heart-shatteringly. pope and kie were clinging to each other. an officer behind pope was holding him.
her life was falling apart.
SADIE SPEAKS!
word count: 1261
and briar is losing
everything again
poor bby
also! is anyone interested in
making a john b briar video edit?
lmk!