Iris had only been gone for twenty minutes and Seb was already pacing back and forth in the room, going from the window to the door and back again.
He felt agitated and caged in even though the hotel room was very large and he felt like a run would do him good but he didn't want to head out in case he got spotted and photographed. Ben might have been clueless in the bedroom department but he wasn't completely stupid, it might not take him long to put two and two together if there were photos of Seb in the British press. And it would be even worse for Iris if that happened.
There had been a bit of an argument on the phone between Iris and her mother, with her mother insisting that Iris explained herself there and then while she'd insisted on going to her parent's house to talk face to face. It had turned out that Ben had spoken to them before she could herself after he could no longer keep his heartbreak, anger and bitterness to himself.
Seb couldn't help but worry, the last thing he wanted was for Iris to fall out with her family and Ben opening his mouth like he had had already stirred up bad feeling. He hoped that she'd be able to smooth things over; maybe if she explained her feelings about her marriage to her mum, explained that she just didn't love Ben anymore and hadn't wanted to hurt him then her mum might be more understanding? She hadn't sounded like the understanding type earlier on but surely she'd want her daughter to be happy?
With the traffic in London being quite heavy, it had taken Iris longer than usual to reach the smart, leafy suburbs of Rickmansworth where her parents lived.
A quick phone call by Seb to the hire car company meant that she was now able to drive the Volvo - something else which she was sure she'd be questioned on as she parked on the kerbside outside the house.
And she was right...
"Who's car is that? Is that his? That man you slept with?" Angela didn't even say hello to her daughter as she stood on the front doorstep, her arms folded across her chest and a stern look on her face that Iris remembered well from her childhood when she'd done something wrong.
Walking up the red, brick weaved drive towards her mother, Iris suppressed the urge to roll her eyes and reminded herself to tread very carefully - now was not the time to bring Sebastian into things. "No mum, it's not. It's a hire car I sorted last night." That was half true; it was a hire car, just a hire car that Seb had arranged for her to drive earlier.
Angela sighed and stood aside, holding the door open with an unhappy sounding, "you'd better come in, we don't want the neighbours knowing our business."
Iris stepped into her childhood home and anxiously hovered in the hallway on the black and white chequered floor tiles while her mum closed the door.
"Go through to the kitchen, your dads there," Angela said in a softer tone.
Iris did as she was told, as if she was still ten years old - right now that's the way she felt.
"Morning Iris, coffee?" She was greeted more cheerily by her dad, Joseph, who was reading a newspaper but then he'd always been the more laid back parent. It had always been a case of 'good cop', 'bad cop' with her parents and her dad had always been the 'good cop'.
"No thanks," she sat down on a high, white stool at the kitchen island. She just wanted to get this over with, now didn't feel like the time to be sat drinking coffee.
Angela sighed as she took a seat opposite her husband while her daughter sat next to her. Everything felt like it was such a mess; her daughter's marriage looked to have gone up in flames and Ben's heartbroken revelations had already caused an underlying tension with their close friends - his parents. And while she felt angry at Iris, she knew she had to give her the chance to explain herself. For all she knew there could have been issues in Iris's marriage that neither herself or Joseph knew about.
"I'm so sorry to both of you," Iris began, looking at her hands as they laid on the white marble surface. She suddenly wished that she'd accepted the offer of a coffee after all, she needed something to hold on to.
"I just wish you'd warned us," Joseph spoke up to stop his wife from potentially tearing strips off of their nervous looking daughter, "of course, we all had our suspicions that something wasn't right after Ben disappeared in Bergen but to hear that from him, that you'd slept with someone else... he was broken when he told us, absolutely in bits."
"And you must know he's also told Christine and Nicholas, we had them on the phone last night; they're devastated and understandably angry and wanted to know what we knew," Angela added, taking note of the way that Iris was starting to nervously pick at her fingers, "they thought the world of you, you know that, they saw you almost as their own daughter. They're so upset that you'd do such a thing."
"I'm not proud of it," Iris replied solemnly, "I never meant to hurt him." Inside she was dying to tell them everything, to tell them how she'd met Seb and fallen in love with him and how she hadn't been truly happy in her marriage for quite some time. She was sure that if they met Seb they'd love him just as much as they did Ben. Now wasn't the right time though, not with everything so raw and up in the air.
"You slept with another man," Angela stated, raising her voice a little, "your husband found a photo of you sleeping in another man's bed, how can you say that you didn't mean to hurt him? It was always going to come out at some point."
"We thought you were happy," Joseph leant on his arms on the surface, "you and Ben have been together since your school days, you've always looked so in love."
"I'm not blaming Ben but I've not been happy in our marriage for a while," she admitted.
Angela slammed a hand down with a bang and couldn't help but shout, "then why didn't you talk to him?! Or talk to us?! You don't just jump into bed with the first man who pays you attention! That's not how we raised you Iris!"
"I was drunk and made a huge mistake!" she defended herself, "and for some reason the guy decided to take a photo of me and not tell me he'd done it but in the end it also made me realise how unhappy I was with Ben. It was a wake up call."
"And you never thought to discuss your feelings with your husband? To give him a chance to try and put things right?" Joseph asked as he folded his newspaper in half and put it down.
Iris stared at the marble countertop as she thought about all the times when she could and should have been brave enough to open up to Ben and tell him how she was feeling and how she just wasn't happy with their sex life but she'd always been afraid of hurting his feelings and then she'd fallen for Seb and it felt like her world had changed for the better. "I did think about talking to him so many times but I didn't want to hurt his feelings."
"And look how that ended up," Angela bitterly cut in.
"I know this whole thing is one big mess and that I've hurt other people besides Ben and I'm sorry for that but I haven't been happy with him, we've grown apart. If it wasn't for..." she quickly stopped and corrected herself before Seb's name could roll off her tongue, "if I hadn't done what I've done then we'd have split anyway, I'd have told him in the end."
"Why didn't you give him a chance to make things right?" Joseph asked, "you've been together since your school years..."
"And that's part of the problem," she cut in, "we've grown apart. These past months I've just felt more and more unhappy and as time has passed I've realised that I don't love him like I used to. I know I should have talked to him but I just couldn't bring myself to do it, I could never find the right time."
"And you're prepared to throw away your marriage just like that? Aren't you going to fight for it?" Angela asked, close to grabbing her daughter's hands to stop her from picking at her fingers.
She shook her head sadly and then looked to her dad for support, "no, I'm not. I don't feel the same way about him anymore and I'd rather be single than unhappy in a marriage with a man I no longer love. Ben knows that now."
"Yeah," Joseph sighed, "he did tell us that he'd been prepared to forgive you and that you told him it was over."
There was silence for about a minute as everyone seemed to think about what had happened and let it begin to sink in. Iris felt some relief now that she'd spoken to her parents, though it still niggled at her conscience that she ought to just come clean and tell them about Seb. For her parents; there would be some awkward conversations to have with Ben's parents and hope that their children's marriage breaking down wouldn't mean the end of their friendship. As for their daughter; they wanted her to be happy, they certainly didn't want her to live her life with Ben if it was making her miserable. If only she'd gone about ending her marriage in a more honest and amicable way instead of partaking in a drunken one night stand.
"So what happens now? Where do we go from here?" Angela asked, as all her thoughts led to those questions.
Iris wasn't sure what to say and she stared at her fingers, realising that she'd made her thumb on her left hand bleed where she'd been anxiously picking at it.
Joseph noticed it too and he quickly got to his feet to grab her a sheet of paper towel, handing it to her as he sat back down. "We want you to be happy, you know that don't you?" he said as she dabbed her thumb.
"And I will be," she gave him a weak smile. With Seb, she knew she'd be happy, there was no doubt in her mind.
"So what's your plan? Ben said he told you to leave the apartment, you know you're entitled to half, right?" Angela pointed out. "Where are you staying? You can't live in a hotel until you find somewhere. Maybe you could go back home and talk to Ben, maybe come to some kind of arrangement that means you can stay there."
This was awkward. Overnight, Iris had agreed to spend the rest of her summer break with Seb in Switzerland, how could she explain that to her parents? "I've sorted something, I'll be staying in Switzerland with a friend," she replied carefully.
Angela's eyebrows immediately shot up with suspicion, "a friend?"
"She's going on holiday there and said I could join her, she's been able to add me onto her flight and hotel booking," she felt terrible for lying but didn't know what else to do, telling them about Seb was just too soon.
"Really?" Angela wasn't entirely sure she believed what she'd just heard. In her mind, the man her daughter had slept with was the most likely 'holiday' companion. "Where abouts in Switzerland and who is this friend?"
"We'll be near to Lake Constance, I've heard the scenery there is amazing. I'll be able to go hiking and take some beautiful photos and it'll give me time to think about what I do next. And I'm going with Sarah who's head of catering from the team and a couple of her friends." Sarah wasn't a total lie, she really was head of catering with the travelling side of the team. The rest, however, was made up on the spot. While she would be going to Switzerland, she wouldn't be visiting Lake Constance unless Seb wanted to go.
"You know your problems will still be here when you come back," Angela remarked, feeling placated for now.
"Ange, let Iris go and have a break with her friends," Joseph gently scolded his wife, "it'll do both her and Ben good to have this time apart. Talking can wait until she's back, Ben will have calmed down by then."
Iris smiled gratefully, there was her dad being the 'good cop' again. Now she felt even worse for lying to them. She resolved to tell them about Seb before the fly-away part of the F1 season started at the end of September.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
During the drive back into London and back to the hotel, Iris felt only marginally better about everything. She hated lying to her parents but that was better than them knowing the truth. The less they knew, the less they could tell Ben's parents and the less Ben would know too. It was just easier all round if everyone thought she was single at least for a few more weeks.
She'd left Rickmansworth behind with things less fractious between herself and her mum. She'd explained once more how sorry she was for what had happened, how she hadn't been happy with Ben and added that if she'd continued on in her marriage then resentment would have crept in and eventually torn them apart anyway. She'd made a point of saying how she was starting to love Ben more like a brother than her husband and would always feel guilty for cheating on him - and that part was very true, she knew she'd always carry some guilt around with her for what she'd done no matter how happy she'd be with Seb.
He checked his watch one more time not only for the time but also to see how many pointless steps he'd done while pacing the room waiting for Iris to return.
This was ridiculous, he wasn't a worrier but yet here he was fretting over how Iris had been getting on with her parents and the grilling she'd probably got. They'd agreed that wasn't the right time to introduce him and he didn't want his first time meeting her parents to be marred because he was the man she'd cheated with.
Losing all rational thought for a moment he grabbed his phone from the bed and quickly selected her number from his contacts. It rang a few times and then went to her voicemail and he cut the call, wondering if she was still at her parent's house or making her way back and not taking his call because she was driving.
It was then when there was a knock on the door and he practically ran the short distance to open it and see who it was, hoping that Iris was back.
"You're back," he exclaimed as the open door revealed his brunette beauty, "how was it?"
"Urgh," Iris groaned as she entered the room and let the door swing shut behind her, dropping her bag to the floor as she walked further in.
Seb rubbed the back of his neck for a second and let out a disappointed sounding, "oh, like that huh."
"I hate lying to them," she moaned as she flopped down on to the bed and kicked off her trainers.
"Lying? What did you tell them?" he asked, joining her to sit next to her.
"Well, I couldn't tell them about you, like we'd agreed, so I had to go with the drunken one night stand story. They were so disappointed in me, I felt like I was twelve or something."
"I did say that I'd take the flack and I still stand by that," he offered, watching her as she gazed down at the carpeted floor.
"You know that I can't do that, I can't have their first impression of you being the man that I...." she trailed off, finding it hard to say the words 'cheated with'.
"I think they'd have got over that eventually, especially when they see how happy you are," he replied.
She stared hard at the green pattern in the carpet, flecked with a gold colour. Even though she'd left her parent's house on better terms with them she still felt bad for lying and for the trouble she'd caused them with Ben's parents.
"You are happy, aren't you?" Seb asked, placing a hand on her jeans covered knee after she'd failed to answer him. He hadn't admitted it to her but he'd been having these unwelcome thoughts that she might leave her husband and then realise that wasn't as happy with himself as she'd probably thought she'd be. Especially after the way Ben had found out about them.
Hearing the worry in voice she looked his way and broke out into a smile, "yeah, of course I am. I love you."And she was happy with Seb; who wouldn't be? He was beautiful both inside and out and she still couldn't believe that he was hers. She just wished she'd met him under different circumstances, that she wasn't married. She'd settled down far too young and now she was paying for it.
"If you've changed your mind or if you ever do, then...." he stopped, he couldn't say the rest but she knew what he meant as she turned to face him and slipped her arms around his shoulders.
"I love you," she said, leaning in to lightly rest her forehead against the side of his head, "I admit that the way we happened wasn't ideal but I couldn't be without you now and once everything has calmed down then I want everyone to know about us."
He broke out into a smile and turned his head to capture her lips in a sweet kiss, "you know I like to keep my private life, private, but yeah, I can't wait to let more people know about us other than Britta, Mark and Antti. And next year will be different, we will be in our own little bubble, away from F1."
The thought of all the time they'd have to spend together next year, how they'd be away from the media glare, gave her a feeling a warmth and contentment and she moved to sit on his lip, straddling him and crossing her wrists over each other at the back of his neck. There was still one not so small hurdle they'd probably have to overcome though, "good luck keeping it private when Ben finds out."
He reached a hand up and began to fiddle with a lock of her hair, giving a small roll of his eyes because he knew she was right, "yeah but we'll sort that out if or when it happens."
He was only toying with her hair and it made her body tingle, she'd never be able to get to grips with the effect Seb had on her, she just knew it. "I know Ben and I know that when he finds out about us...."
"He'll sell his story to the highest bidder," he finished off her sentence for her, "then I'll do as much as I can to ensure that doesn't happen."
"How?" she asked curiously, "I don't think you'll be able to pay him off."
"We'll see," he gave a little shrug and then broke out into another smile as her closeness made him think that he'd had enough of talking about her parents and her ex. There were other, far more pleasurable things they could be doing.
She immediately noticed his smile and then a glint to his eyes which probably meant one thing. She still pretended that she was oblivious though, "What are you thinking?"
Slipping his arms around her waist he let himself flop backwards onto the bed, taking her with him and relishing the little giggle she let out, followed by an "oh, that huh?" as his hands then landed on her behind and he lifted his head to claim another kiss from her.
Tomorrow they'd be heading home to Switzerland and for him it meant they'd be starting a new phase in their relationship, a relationship that was sacred to him and that he'd guard fiercely. Ben could try and do his worst, they'd get through it.