Sophia
Even tho only ten minutes have passed since i have been holding Kyle in my arms trying to calm him down, it felt like ten thousand years had passed. I didn't leave his side at all.
Why? A person like me who is considered an emotionless bitch, a person like me who is known to be a heartbreaker and not in the sexy kinda way, the way which destroys a person completely.
But here I am, holding a fragile sensitive boy who is recovering from his breakdown. It felt like thousands of sharp daggers were piercing my heart as i heard his small sniffles.
Why was his pain causing me pain? Is....is this what it feels like to actually care for someone who has managed to put themselves in your heart and now you never want to let go of it? Is this what...giving affection and empathy feels like? Am I actually feeling something in my heart? A feeling so soft yet so beautiful and terrifying.
"Kyle?" I whisper into his ears. "Are you good now? Do you want me to do anything for you?" I asked in the most gentle voice. At least i tried to, i have no idea if it is comforting him in any way. But i didn't want him to feel like i was getting irritated with it.
"C-can i-i sl-eep with you for sometime? I ne-ed s-someone t-to h-hold me." He said with his voice cracking after each word.
Cuddling was something i was terrible at. The times I spent with Brandon and the only kind of skin-ship i had with him was hugs and occasionally holding hands. And now straight up cuddling this guy? I felt a weird current run in my veins.
But how can i leave him alone? Especially when he is in such a broken state. Maybe I should've taken him with me to buy the spaghetti, then this would've never happened. But now is not the time to blame anyone.
"Okay Kyle, i'll take you to the guest room-
"Take me anywhere, j-just please be with me" he mumbled sadly. Sighing i nodded.
I didn't say anything. Like i said I was ready to do anything he wanted me to.
"Okay, hold onto me". He slowly got up and I held him as I lead us to the guest room
I walked towards the bedroom and opened the door. We entered and i laid him down on the soft mattress. I took out a soft blanket and covered him with it. I looked down at his drained out face and sighed. His eyes were red and puffy. It needed to be iced.
As i moved away, i felt him grab my wrist,
"Wh-where are you going? Don't go..." he whispered softly yet the sadness in his whisper was easy to figure out.
"I'm not going anywhere kyle, i'm gonna get a cold press to ice your eyes, it will make you feel better and also the headache won't bother you." I explained and he let go of my hand. I went to the kitchen and brought out a clean towel and dipped it in some cold water and bought it to the room.
I sat beside him and started to press his eyes softly with the cloth. After doing it for about 5 minutes, i kept the towel aside and looked at him, his eyes were better now. He look at me and said, "please hug me...i want to rest."
Every nerve in me was telling don't do it but in the end i did it.
I held him like a delicate flower, I brought his body next to mine and he put his arms around my waist and his face in the crook of my neck. Unknowingly i started to massage his head. His fucking hair is so soft. I could literally do this forever. I felt him hum in satisfaction and within minutes i felt him drift off to his dream world.
What am i doing right now? Why am i doing this? Why am i allowing myself to feel this way?
I didn't bother to sleep. I was there incase he has another nightmare. After about thirty minutes when i felt him falling in deep sleep, i slowly detached myself from him and he whined initially but went back to cuddling the pillow.
I chuckled at this sight. Such a precious human being.
I checked the time and it was 6:30 pm. Still enough time to make some delicious spaghetti for him.
Once all ingredients were laid out, i got straight into cooking.
One and half hours later
Finally the food was ready. The aroma of the delicious prawn spaghetti was in the air. Feeling very satisfied with the results, I decided to check up on Kyle.
Once I entered the room, i saw him still sleeping. As much as i hated the thought of waking him up, i had to cuz the boy gotta eat too. And also i can finally apologize to him properly.
"Kyle wake up food is ready." I softly said. Damn I haven't been this soft to anyone in a long ass time.
"Hmhmhmm five minutes please" he mumbled.
"Nope you have to wake up now, come on I made the spaghetti, don't you want to try it?"
He slowly opened his eyes and thankfully it wasn't extremely red and puffy. Good thing I iced them.
"Spaghetti?" He mumbles.
"Yes now freshen up and come out, I'll prepare the plate for you and then we can eat okay?" I said and exited the room to prepare the plates.
After a few minutes i heard the room door opening and there he was. His lips were slightly pouted. God those lips....wait what focus sophia don't be a fucking creep.
His eyes lit up at the food which was on the table. A plate of spaghetti with some garlic bread. It wasn't fancy but seeing his reaction was worth the effort i put into it.
He sat opposite to me and grabbed the fork and took a bite. He closed his eyes in ecstasy and let out a moan which caused me to choke on my water. Kyle why did you make that sound.
"It's sooo good!! I love it a lot!" He beams with happiness which unknowingly caused me to smile too. Why did seeing him in happiness caused butterflies to erupt in my stomach.
"Well i'm really glad you liked it kyle."
After a few minutes i spoke up
"Kyle i am really sorry for lashing out at you that day, it's just that I feel extremely bothered when people ask me about my relation with my parents which isn't on the best terms but still that is no excuse for shouting at you. Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?" I spoke with so much guilt. Kyle had his eyes slightly widened but immediately smiled at me,
"I forgive you sophia, and don't worry i am no longer mad at you, infact i was never mad at you, I should've kept myself in my limit and not bombard you with questions. So technically even i'm at fault so-
"Nope you are not apologizing to me. I was the one at fault okay" that immediately shut him up.
Cute. For god knows how many times i've said that in my mind.
We both ate in silence. I didn't bother asking him what the nightmare was about. I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable.
Whatever happened between us today was something I never imagined to happen even in my wildest dreams. This guy managed to bring out a side in me which I never knew even existed.
Time ticked to 8:45 pm and I knew it was time for him to go. But strangely, I didn't want him to go. I didn't want him to go anywhere else. I wanted him by my side. What was i feeling right now? Fucking hell I really need to control my shit.
"How will you go home? It's not safe to walk out in the dark" i asked him as he was packing his bag.
"I texted my dad and he should be here in a few minutes."
"Oh i see."
There. Another silence followed us. I was standing right next to him. We didn't say a word nor did we sit on the couch next to each other. We stood in complete silence.
He was playing with the chain of the bag while looking down. I was staring at this gorgeous human beside me. How did i not notice this beauty when he first entered the class. I now understand why people call him a sunshine. He deserves that title.
But has anyone else seen this sunshine having his own thunderstorm? If so then who comforted him like i did? Who was there for him before me?
I don't know why but the thought of someone else comforting him was making my insides twist. Why? I don't know myself.
He then looked at me. He too started to stare at me. Probably trying to study my face like how i was doing for him. I didn't mind. Let him do whatever he wants. I'll happily comply. Because that's how much of an effect he has on me and that too in such a short period of time.
"Thank you for everything today sophia" he says not breaking the eye contact.
"Don't mention it, i'm glad you feel better now".
He took one step towards me and now we were in close proximity. Facing each other as we could feel our breaths on our faces.
I asked him,
"Do you accept my apology?"
He nodded.
"Is there any other punishment i have to face?" I boldly asked him. Usually he would blush at such words but this time he felt more...more dominant.
"Do you think you need any punishment sophie?" He huskily whispered.
I would lie if i say that didn't make my legs tingle and my mind going foggy. Those sinfully tempting lips of his.
God i wish i could kiss those soft looking lips. I was willing to do anything to claim those lips.
The tension was rising as our breaths started to get heavy. None of us moved. We just stared.
The tension was eased when we heard the car honk.
"Your parents must have arrived, you should go now" i said to him.
"Sophia....thanks once again..." he said with a heavy sigh as he picked his bag and threw it on his shoulders.
He was about to open the door when he looked at me once again. He gave me a soft smile before opening the door and closing it. I heard the car drive away.
I plopped myself on the couch. Today was something......i don't know how to even put it in words.
But one thing's for sure. Kyle Smith was going be the end of me. And you know what? I was ready for it. I'm ready to destroy anything in exchange of keeping that smile on his face. I was ready to destroy and be destroyed for it.
But I had no idea what exactly I felt for him? I know one thing is for sure that someone like him firmly believes in love. He must dream of having a partner who is exactly like him. What am i? Not even close it. Just thinking that was making my heart crack. Why am I so bothered by it? It shouldn't. Nothing will ever happen between us. It's the bittersweet truth
Which i had to accept.
But who says I can't look at him from afar? I will and no one will fucking stop me.
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Two days later :
"So that's what had happened that day". I said as my friends literally stared at me like they had seen a ghost.
"Wow i mean wow....that's some dark shit" Ryan sighs.
"I'm glad you didn't leave his side Sophia, just proves that you are a good person" Ash says as both claire and ryan agree.
I wasn't paying any attention to their words. My thoughts only included Kyle. His nightmares never seemed to leave my mind at all. Why am I feeling so fucking curious? It's none of my business at all, but then...I can't help the inquisitiveness you know. Like i am so intrigued by him. No one and i mean NO ONE has managed to make me feel so attracted towards them. Yet this guy, not even a month and so much has happened. I can't seem to get him out of my head.
"I don't know you guys I just can't seem to get him out of my mind at all." I blurted out and they just gave me a sad look, pitying my condition.
"Sophs why don't you try to find out what happened to him?" Ash suggested which made me again think.
Is it okay for me to just poke my nose into his past life? No it is not. But why does it feel like a good decision?
"Ash is right sophie, Tyler can help you with it right? Ask him". Claire suggested. Yeah tyler can help me. The dude will turn the world upside down to get any sort of information. But not now. I have to figure out some things on my own before taking his help.
"Yeah Tyler can do that, but not so soon, before asking him for anything I need to figure out who Kyle is exactly before digging deep into his past. Whoever he is, the guy is no simple guy for sure". All of them nodded at my words.
"If you need any help, i can ask Noah too, I mean him and Tyler are best friends so even he can contribute too". Noah was Ash's brother. Both him and Tyler have gone through hell and back but yet their friendship is strong.
"I'll let you guys know if I need anything" i said sighing loudly. This whole situation is fucking me up.
Soon we left for our last class of the day, I need to somehow get close to Kyle to know what exactly happened with him. I had this weird gut feeling that he is somehow connected to a dark world. Yeah a bright guy like him, if something traumatic actually happened to him, then how the fuck is he still smiling so much? Surely you can get therapy and start over but come on? It doesn't always work out right? His nightmares felt more like PTSD attacks to me. But again who am I to.....worry about him so much?
I sat on my seat and to my surprise, Kyle didn't come today. Fuck I haven't seen him the entire day. Is he not well? Did something happen?
Soon the professor entered and started his lesson. I couldn't pay attention to it, not when Kyle was the only thing running in my head. I was busy figuring out a reason to go see him when the universe decided to do it for me,
"Alright class now for your first semester project, i'm going to be pairing you into two and remember this project will be important for your credit scores so do not take it lightly." I was secretly praying to match me and Kyle up when my luck just became more positive when i heard, "Kyle and Sophia, since Kyle is not hear sophia you must inform him about this project okay?" Bingo! Just what I needed. I nodded my head in response and just waited for the class to get over.
I didn't even bother saying bye to anyone, I just wanted to see him. I needed to know if he is okay, I don't care how desperate i sound right now, I need to see him.
After the bus stop at the bus stand, i got down quickly and made a move towards his house. What a good luck I had, bumping into Kyle's mom and then my sharp memory memorized the route to his place. He didn't live far from my house, just a couple blocks away. So in total it was a 10 minute walk.
The bus stand was five minutes away from both of our places.
As i got closer to his house, something felt strange. It was as if I entered an abandoned place. It was awfully quiet, and let's not forget the goosebumps i got as soon as i stood in front of his door.
It's been exactly 14 days since i abruptly left. Taking a deep breath, i pressed the doorbell and when i tell you the way my heart was literally about to jump out of my chest, I wasn't kidding.
I straightened myself as the door opened revealing a....young boy? Oh wait it must be Kyle's younger brother. He looked at me strangely which honestly I couldn't blame him, he had never seen me and considering how young he looks.
"Umm excuse me who are you?" He said not opening the door completely which only allowed me to see his face partially.
"Uh-hello kid, I'm your brother's classmate Sophia and-
I couldn't even finish my words when he opened the door widely and suddenly had a huge smile on his face. What the fuck?
"Oh! You're sophia?! Omg please come in!!" He exclaimed happily and dragged me inside. I almost lost my balance.
"Woah woah slow down kid!" I smiled at him. There's something about this family which makes me smile without my knowledge, seriously what is this sorcery?
I sat down on the couch and he sat beside me. He still had a smile on his face.
"So what's your name?"
"My name is Shawn"
Shawn? That name sounds awfully familiar. But where did i hear this name?
"Well hello shawn it's nice to meet you. Can you tell me where your brother is?" I asked him and he immediately became sad. My heart started to beat fast. Did something happen?
"I'm his project partner and since he didn't come today, I came here to tell him about it". I said hiding my nervousness.
"Umm you see big bro is-
Suddenly the door bell rang and he sprinted towards the door. He opened it and it was...Kyle's parents!
Oh shit i'm so fucked right now. The way i had left without properly saying bye, god I definitely left a bad impression.
They both saw me and widened their eyes. Oh no what do i do now!
"Wait aren't you the girl who helped me at the bus stop?" The man said and i immediately recognized his voice. Wait so this man is Kyle's father!
"Honey! She is the one who helped me find the picture" His mom smiled and said, "she is the one who saved kyle from a few bullies hon"
Unintentionally I had helped this family not knowing that they were related to each other. What kind of game is this universe playing with me all of a sudden.
"Momma She is Kyle's project partner and she came by to ask about him. How is big bro now?" He asks them and I immediately looked at them. What the hell happened to him?
The parents looked visibly nervous and sad. I took up the courage and asked them.
"What happened to Kyle?" And their answer just made my heart stop beating right then and there.
"Sweetie, Kyle is in the hospital, He-he had an accident".