I let Zayn sleep a little more. After he said that, he kind of dozed off again. Probably, he's still got that hangover from his post birthday clubbing. I sighed and got up. As I was about to leave, I heard Ayesha crying. Zayn moaned. He flickered one eye and stared at me. I think he wanted me to take care of her. I nodded at him. He closed his eyes and went back to sleep. I approached to her crib. She was siting up and crying. Her blue eyes all watery. She gestured someone to pick her since her hands were up and she grabbed the air.
"Ok, ok, Bianca is here," I whispered.
"Mommy, mommy," she roared. A tear rolled down my cheek. I picked her up and tucked her under my head on my shoulder.
"Mommy's here," I told her. I patted her back and handed her the sippy cup of water that she was reaching for. She drank it all as I sat down on the rocky chair and rocked back and forth. Is this how it feels like to be a mother? It was kind of different for me. I don't know why but it was. Ayesha pulled back the plastic nipple from the bottle and yawned whilst she rubbed her eyes and stretched. She became tired again. I placed her down in her crib again and she instantly fell asleep. Somehow, I became so tired even though the sun was rising and the birds were chirping I sat on the rocking chair guarding Ayesha that my eyes became heavy and dropped into darkness.
I felt someone poking me. Fingers poking my eyelids open and close. I motioned my hands lazily to those hands and grabbed them firmly. They were chubby and small. I tried to open my eyes. My vision blurred but a figure stood in front of me. I blinked several times. I came to see that Ayesha was the one who was poking my eyelids. How did she ever climb out of her crib and onto my lap? Anyways, she fidgetted in my lap since I grabbed hold of her wrist.
"I'm sorry,"I apologize as I let go of my grip. She smiled. Her almond shaped blue eyes sparkled as she crinkled her nose. I leaned my face just to touch her nose. She giggled showing her nice baby teeth. I bounced her up and down my lap.
"Morning, bedhead," Zayn greeted waking up from his bed. He had messy hair, eyes red, and a 5'0 clock shadow.
"I think you should be the bedhead not me," I corrected him. He pointed at the mirror beside me. I looked my self in the mirror. GOSH! I did look like a bedhead. This is what happens when I don't braid my hair. It all gets tangled and messy.
"Morning to you too Zayn," I greeted. He half smiled and got off of his bed. Damn! He had a nice body. I love how his tattoos complimented it. I never loved guys with tattoos, it was a pet-peeve for me. For some reason, Zayn was an exception since it fit with his personality and style completely.
I let go of Ayesha and went to my room to fix my hair up. I was hideous! But before I could walk out. Zayn pulls my arm and twirls in his grasp. He sways me in his arms. He moved my hair which cover part of my face and placed it behind my ear.
"Where are you going pretty lady?" he asks raspy. I giggled.
"I'm going to my room to fix my hair. I'll be back," I told him. He let go.
"Please come back, babe I'll miss you," he joked and kissed me on the cheek. I blushed a little.
"I promise I 'll be back," I told him. Then he pulled my hand back again.
"May tumse pyaar karta hoon," he quietly says as he followed my eyes. I knew what he said, it was in Urdu.but I felt like he said something sweet and loving to me.
"What does that mean?" I asked.
"It means I love you," he answered and let go of me. May tumsee pyaar karta hoon. 5 little words but could mean so much to me. I went to my room as that phrase just played in my head like a tape recorder. May tumse pyaar karta hoon. Well, Zayn May tumse pyaar karta hoon too! Forever actually. I amended my hair into a loose braid and went back to Zayn's room as promised.
"As I promised, I came back for you," I announced. He wasn't there. I figured he went to the bathroom to clean himself up. I wanted to brush my teeth but I bet it was occupied by Zayn. So I went back to my room and grabbed it and ran downstairs. It was empty but with the exceptions of Zayn's grandma, Mona. She was taking care of Ayesha. Mona was in the kitchen making breakfast for herself and Ayesha.
"Good morning, beta," she greeted me as Ayesha was slumped on her waist.
"Good, morning, Mona. Do you know where your second bathroom is?" I asked.
"Left, you right and you see it," she replied with her broken English, yet I understood what she was saying.
I followed her directions and found my way to the bathroom. After I brushed my teeth and cleaned myself up, I went to the kitchen. Zayn hadn't come down yet.
"Where's Zayn?" I asked Mona who was eating roti with vegetables. Ayesha was on the chair beside her eating a blended substance. I believe it was oatmeal or baby formula. I sat down across her.
"He maybe still changing. He take long time to dress up," she replied through chews of her food.
"Mona, " I started up uncomfortably, "i'm sorry to tell you that I told Zayn about my father. I told Zayn that we are cousins." I scratched my head in guilt. She told me a secret that probably she didn't want me to tell him, but I had to. It was in me to tell him. She grunted and smiled.
"I know you will tell him. That why I tell you. It was my plan," she says as she took another bite of her roti. My eyes grew big in surprise.
"WHAT?! You knew that this will happen?" I questioned as I rose to my two feet and stood there shocked.
She chuckled under her food.
"Yes, my plan was complete and correct to my predictions, I know all," she said. I was still in shock. I took a deep breath in and out as I sat down. My eyes fluttered in Ayesha's direction. She was pulling her spoon into her mouth and laughing as she takes each bite in.
"So you knew all this time? How come you didn't tell me?"
She stared down at her plate that was nearly empty.
"It's better not to give out the whole information but better to be quiet and let one figure out everything for him/herself," she explained.
"Huh?! What does that mean?" I asked.
"Oh, would you like breakfast now?" she suggested ignoring to my comment.
"Ok, then," I shrugged. She got up and pulled out a plate from the cupboard and gave me particularly what she had. Zayn came down to the kitchen.
"Morning, nana," he greets her as he kisses her cheek. I smiled. He sat down at the table beside me and kissed me on the cheek. Ayesha giggled. Zayn made his famous tongue out face with one eyebrow up. A classic. Mona gave us our breakfast and sat down. I took a bite of the roti and it tasted great! It was the best thing I ever had! It was hard to explain that taste but to me it tasted fresh.
"You know, Bianca, my nana makes the best roti in this world," he says as he scarfs the roti down his throat.
"Yes, I agree, it's really good," I complimented and took another bite with the vegetable.
"Good. Glad you like it."
I heard her sigh.
"So what are you guys up to today?" she asks. I stopped chewing. Did she know about our plans for today? Did she know that Zayn and I were going to the archive library, today?
"Um, well, we are going to the Archive library to find where her mom currently lives," Zayn told her softly. I gulped the mesh in my mouth. I drank the water that was placed beside me. A short silence hung.
"Oh, ok. Do Patricia know?" she asked. I nodded.
"Oh, ok. I won't tell her, promise," she winks and leaves as she cleans and picks up Ayesha to the living room.
"So we're going to the archives today?" I asked. I was almost done eating my breakfast.
"Yup, but we must hurry before my parents find out," he implores as he gets up and walks to the sink. I got up, too and washed my plate.
We went to the foyer and pulled on our jackets boots and other accessories to battle the cold but harsh winter. It was snowing but there was a pile of snow lofted onto each side of the yard and around the neighbourhood. People wee out shovelling their drive ways. Children were playing outside. It was snow day. I climbed into Zayn's car.
The engine reeve as he ignited it. The inside of his car was cold and breezy. The air swooped in from underneath the car and tickled my legs. I hugged myself tight. That's how cold I was.
"Sorry, Bianca. The car's just heating up, it'll be warm in a few minutes," he smiled. I could see his nose became super red. Red as Rudolph the red nose reindeer's nose. I giggled.
"What?"
"OH nothing, let's go already," I say still laughing. he shrugged and shifted into the backing up gear.
I stared out my window; looking at the beautiful scenery that I began to believe was a painting of some sort. The snow banks were fresh and luscious. They glimmered as a tree covered in snow dusted off when a Crow sat on a branch. It reminded me of this poem that I read back in high school. It was by Robert Frost. I remembered what it was called. It was : Dust of snow. Funny to think how I still remember the poem itself, too.
The way a crow,
Shook down on me,
The dust of snow,
From a hemlock tree,
Has given my heart.
A change of mood,
and saved some part,
of a day I had rued.
The sun glistened on the pile of snow when Zayn pulled up on a curb, that it reflected off and hit the rear view mirror. Speaking of rear view mirrors. I remembered one of quotes made by Zayn.
"Don't devote anytime thinking of painful memories from your past. You can't drive well while looking in the rear view mirror."
We pulled up at the huge archive library. It was an old building but I knew in my heart that it's going to have what I was looking for. Potentially, I mean. Zayn opened the door for like the gentlemen he was. He even held my hand as we walked from the parking lot to the building.
As we entered, there was an ominous silence. It was too quiet. It looked like a regular library but with only bigger and barely any people. The only people there were the librarians.
"Bianca, wait here, need to go talk to the librarian," he ordered me. I nodded letting go of his hand. I walked causally around the library where I wandered to a shelf full of archived books such as death, birth, history, and even books on adoption dates. I accidentally bumped into one of the books that had their binding sticking out with my elbow. I picked it up. Strange, I thought. It read: " Patients of the mentally ill; 1991-2004." Curiously, I flipped through the book. It seemed to me that it's all the records of those who've been admitted in and out and possibly dead.
A hand touched my shoulder and I jumped dropping the book on my foot.
"AH! You scared me," I panted as I saw it was only Zayn. He moved back a step.
"Oh I'm sorry, come let's go to the computer archive data base," he said as he led the way.
The computer data base was where I could find out where a person is currently living, find out criminals, and other important information. It was that useful. I logged onto with a password key that Zayn gave me. I played around with the data base when something scary and horrid caught my eye. There, I saw a familiar face. A face so distinct that the name came out as a screech.
"Zain," I said in a whisper. Zayn Malik came over wandering what was wrong.
"What's wrong Bianca," he gushed but slowly gulped as he saw the face. I think he knew who it was despite the fact that he had never seen my fiance before.
"My fiance, he's in here. Zain Akbar," I shockingly say. I was still horrified out of my wits to know that my fiance was not only in the data base but under the most-wanted criminal category.
"Oh, but are sure it's his real name?" he asked pointing further down at the big bold letter that read: "ALI AHMED."
I covered both my hands over my mouth and sobbed softly. Zayn wrapped his arms around me gently.
"It' ok, you're safe now," he reassured me. I wasn't crying about my fiance being the most- wanted criminal in Britain or the fact that he had a false identity. I was upset that I read his biography about being a murder, and a rapist. He raped 10 women in 2010 and practically murdered 7 people in the following year. Plus he was in his forties yet he didn't look too old. He was probably more than half my age. It all made sense now, it was the truth to it all. Everything unfolded, well partially, but still it was the truth to it all. The truth to everything. I sobbed quietly as Zayn comforted me in his arms.
_____________________________________________________________________________
Hey guys!!!!!!!!!! I KNOW IT'S BEEN FOREVER. SORRY FOR THE HOLD UP SINCE I WAS EXTREMELY BUSY WITH SCHOOL! I finally got the chance to update. At least you guys can read for now, until my next update. I love you guys. Happy EASTER. Plze don't forget to read, comment and vote, plze.
Thanks!
Luv~ the author!