We're all tasked with an avoidable job
Living, surviving life until we don't have to
It's hard , way too hard , unfathomable- this job
Sometimes we want to quit, sometimes I want to
Somedays more than others
In those days , a lot of blood is spilled
Now now, I ain't a murderer but blood is spilled
In the struggle to keep breathing
When water has filled my lungs
I try cutting the water out
Does it suffice?
Guess so , I mean I am alive
Is it healthy? I can only wonder
Does it hurt ? No not really
At least not as much as my suffocating heart
The latter, words cannot suffice
Am I better? Yes I believe I am
On days when it doesn't flood
On days when I still can swim , I'm better
I mean I even forget the feeling of drowning
But damn sometimes
A storm comes from god knows where
Throwing me off balance
Sometimes the outlet is a bigger , a bigger cut
Cause some waters are angry, frustrated, confused
And those are quite dangerous
But I'll be damned if I don't reach dry grounds
If I don't go trying
Please do remind me of this promise
If ever you find me drowning
I doubt I'll remember it .
I think pork and park are beautiful words 🌀
Perhaps self harm is self love