Back at the main house, the remaining members had just received a report informing that the VSG-U had lost all communication with Team Five- the team both Ant and Dec were part of on the larger scale. On each mission, a certain number of members are assigned to complete the tasks for the day, and later, separately, a different team for the night. Before today to ease members in, allocations were selective - but now - for 'fairness amongst all members' they're random allocations. And it just so happens that tonight was the first mission that Ant would be separated from Dec.
After leaving and saying goodbyes at 5pm, everything went as smoothly as expected. But now, suddenly, something had gone wrong, and base had lost comms with every member out there tonight. All the missions were dangerous, but this one presented a much larger risk than all that came before it due to the severity in the quantity of creatures in this particular, but significant area. The goal of tonight's mission was to take on the rooms little by little, and they were going to start things off. The results of this trial were yet unclear, but not very positive in the least, leaving the VSG-U, and some team members outside of the mission in particular, literally, in the dark.
Dec leaned against the right side of his bed- one knee up, both hands around his leg, eyes down, the only light in the room coming from the natural 7:40pm source through the two large windows in front of him, curtains undrawn.
There he was - sitting alone in his worst nightmare.
In reality though, the report could have said a lot worse. He could have had some real confirmation of the situation, one usually so unbearable he could never think about it. But right now, that possibility was all that was on his mind. And every vision, every anxiety he had of every truth in the situation, was flashing before his eyes. He squeezed them closed in desperation.
Tilting his head back towards the edge of the bed, Dec tried to focus on his breathing in hopes to avoid a particularly large panic attack he knew was coming.
In, and out.
In, and out.
In, and-
'knock' 'knock'
"Dec? It's me, Holly. Are you alright in there? Can I- can we- talk? I just want to make sure-"
She didn't get to finish as Dec opened the door, light came streaming in through the crack in the door from the hallway as Holly stood in front of him, quickly moving into a hug. "Hey.", She whispered to him. "I wanted to make sure you were okay... I didn't want you to be alone."
Dec stayed still and silent against her, but he was grateful for her and her check up, even if he wasn't as direct in showing it.
"He's going to be alright, you know? It's going to be okay. They'll come back, I know they will."
There was as much a chance that Holly was right as to her being wrong, and though her words were nice and it was nice to know she believed them, there was no chance that Dec would too. He had always been a worrier, and this was absolutely no exception. Though he found some comfort in Holly's embrace, it was nothing compared to what he could be feeling with his best mate by his side. He needed Ant to be okay. He needed Ant to be safe. He just had to be. There was no other option Dec would ever accept.
"I should be out there with him, Holly, protecting him, us looking out for each other. The fact that I can't I- I can't help but worry, those guys don't know him, if it came down to it-"
"They'd go back for him, Dec. None of those guys are particularly close to each other, but it's not every man for himself out there. We're all in the same situation, we all want to make it home."
Giving him one final soft squeeze, Holly let go of Dec and stood at arms length. "I'm going to sleep early tonight for tomorrow. If anything more comes up, wake me. No matter how bad it is. Please, Holly."
She was about to question how good that would really be for him but stopped herself midway in thought. Ultimately, this was his decision, not hers.
"Of course I will. And Dec, you know they'll send a search team in the morning if there's nothing back by then, they won't just leave several members behind without help."
"They already are.", Dec mumbled. He sighed. "If it's not random members again, I'll be first in line to volunteer to go. I'll make sure of it."
"Of course. And me and Phil will be right behind you.", She said, placing her hand on his shoulder.
"Thank you."
She smiled empathetically, "Good night, Dec."
"Night Holls."
She flashed him another smile, then headed downstairs.
"How is he?", Philip asked quietly at the bottom of the stairs, following her to the next room.
"Not good, he's worried sick. I can't imagine it.", She admitted sadly as they sat down on the sofa beside each other.
"Well it's to be expected isn't it? I know it's not quite the same but, I think I can, Holly. I know I'd be feeling similar to whatever he's going through if it was you. Not that I'm not worried about Ant, but, well, you know what I mean."
"Yeah. Me too, Phil. Thank you.", She smiled softly.
After chatting for about an hour or so, the two heard multiple sounds of distress coming from upstairs.
"Oh God, Dec- I'll be right back.", Holly hurried upstairs to Dec's room and opened the door carefully.
"Dec?", She said, peeping her head round the corner.
Dec was in bed, sad noises and fast slight movements emanating from him every few seconds, sometimes multiple on occasions. He was definitely asleep. Holly switched on the lamp on her side, then moved close to Dec and shook his shoulders.
"Dec- Dec wake up it's Holly, it's okay, Dec- Dec wake up!"
Dec gasped awake suddenly, struggling to find his breath, whole body shaking-
"Dec, hey, look at me, look at me, it's alright. Breathe in for me? Like this," Holly demonstrated, "and out for me. Just follow me, okay? In- and out. In- and out. In- and out. There you go, keep going just like that for me, okay? It's okay.", She hugged him close, "It's okay.", Holly felt him quietly cry into her shoulder. She rubbed his back and kept talking to him in response to let him calm down eventually. As she felt him doing so and the tears turned to light breaths, Dec pulled away and grabbed a pack of tissues from his bedside drawer. Still beside him, Holly rubbed his back as he composed himself back to normality.
"Did you get anything yet?", Dec asked in a small voice.
Holly shook her head, "No, nothing yet, I'm sorry."
Dec gave a small nod. "What's the time?"
"About 9:30. Me and Phil should be going to bed in a little while."
"Okay. Thank you, Holly for being here. I think I'll try and go back to sleep. I'll be alright.", He looked at her, and as if reading her mind, he added, "Promise."
"Okay, Dec. And of course, anytime."
Deep down, she knew he wasn't alright in the slightest, but he was calm enough that he could manage himself, and clearly he felt okay letting her leave the room, so she obliged.
Holly met Phil downstairs in the kitchen making tea. "What happened? Is he okay?"
"Poor thing was having a nightmare. I had to wake him up, couldn't leave him like that."
Phil handed her a full mug, "Oh, thank you."
"What about now?" He asked, taking a drink from his own mug.
Holly did the same. "He's going back to sleep, or- he'll try to. Seems to be okay enough that he can maybe try again. He didn't talk about what the nightmare was, but I doubt we need many guesses."
"Yeah.", Phil nodded.
The two returned back to their seats on the sofa beside each other, taking slow sips of their tea.
"It's just,", Holly began, "It's so hard knowing what to say, or what to do to really help. I can calm him down to a certain point but after that he's left on his own because whatever I do, what we can do, won't be enough to be better than that, we-"
"We're not Ant.", Phil interjected.
"Yes, exactly. I mean, in any situation Ant could just be in the same room as Dec and that would do so much more for him than I have for him in the past couple hours. And I'm not offended by that at all, it's just a fact. How it is. They have some kind of special magic between each other that only comes out when they're together. It's fascinating to look at and so beautiful, I just wish he was here right now. I know I'm not the only one thinking that."
"Holly... Do you, do you think they're okay? The rest of team 5?"
"I do. And if not all of them, I know Ant's one of the survivors. He has to be, right? He has to be."
Phil reached over and took Holly's hand in his. "He will be."
Holly squeezed his hand and gave a slight smile in response.
"We should go to bed, we might have a long day tomorrow...", She trailed off.
"Yeah... Gimmie your cup, I'll wash them out."
"Thanks, Phil."
As Phil left to the next room, Holly sat on her own, taking deep breaths, her face in her hands, praying all would be alright tomorrow and all the days that would follow of being stuck here. She herself wouldn't know what to do if something bad happened to Ant, and not just how to deal with the aftermath of Dec.
"Please be okay, please be okay, please be okay.", Holly whispered to herself, but called to the world.
Phil entered back into the room and sat beside her, putting an arm around her shoulders.
"It's going to be alright, Hol. We'll make it."
She nodded, trying to convince herself Phil would be right.
'Buzz' 'Buzz'
Holly gasped, leaping out of her seat to instantly grab her phone.
"Oh my god- oh my god, Phil it's Ant, it's him, shit-", She panicked. Phil never caught her swearing unless it was a dire situation.
"Ant?!"
"Holly! Are you okay, are you at the house?"
"Yes, yes we're fine, we're all in the main house. Are you okay, gosh, what happened?"
"I'm fine, Hol- the whole team is, we're on our way back now. I'll explain everything when I'm there- is Dec okay- I've been trying to call and he's not answering,"
Holly put a thumbs up to Phil, and he gave a sigh of relief.
"He's- he's in bed, tried to sleep in case he'd have to go out in the morning."
"Go out? For what?"
"For you. VSG-U would have sent back up in the morning to find you guys. You know Dec would've been first in line to go."
"Yeah... I-I know. How's he been, Holly?"
She knew she should be honest. "Not great, he's really worried, woke up a while ago from a nightmare but I managed to get him to be able to sleep again, if he is. He told me so at least. Me and Phil were about to go to bed, I would've checked on him. He told me to tell him if we got any news, do you want me to-"
"No, we're almost there now, I'll go to him, don't worry. He'll be alright."
Holly smiled. "I know he will be now."
"I'll see you soon, Holls."
"Yeah. See you."
Putting her phone down, Holly felt like she could collapse on the floor in relief and cry. "He's on his way, Phil, he's okay, they're all okay...", Holly and Phil hugged, chanting to herself in her head that it really was okay- he's coming, he's on his way, and he'd be here any minute.
As they heard a car pull in, Holly rushed to the front door, opening it for Ant who came in seconds later.
"Thank god you're okay.", She said, hugging her friend.
Ant nodded, "Thank you for taking care of him."
"'Course, quick go to him, he's still upstairs."
Ant said a quick hello to Phil, then went upstairs to Declan. Reaching his door, he closed it behind him and walked over to his bed, sitting on the edge by his side. Switching the bedside lamp on, he immediately saw Dec's condition. His face was buried deep into the pillow, and he was shuddering from time to time. Ant knew it wasn't just because of the cold.
He reached over and began stroking his hair softly, something he knew made Dec calm, and began to speak just above a whisper.
"Hey, Dec, it's okay, wake up darlin', it's me, I'm back, it's okay..."
Dec stirred awake. He was expecting to see Holly beside him, but instead he saw him.
Dec bolted upright and threw his arms around his friend in an instant. "Y-You're back. You're okay-"
"I am, it's alright kidda, we're all okay."
"Am I dreaming?", Dec asked, not wanting to close his eyes or let go.
"No,", Ant smiled, "No this is real, I promise."
"Thank god.", Dec buried himself in his neck and shoulder, closing his eyes, breathing in deep that all too familiar scent; he'd never felt so lucky to smell something again in his life.
The two held on and rocked a little from side to side. "Stay?", Dec asked quitely.
Ant nodded, "Yeah, 'course. I need the sleep tonight."
The two loosened their hold, "Just give me a minute to get sorted and I'll be back."
"Wait- don't go-", Dec panicked.
"Hey, hey, it's alright, look,", Ant picked up Dec's hand and held it in his, while the other rested on his neck, directing Dec to look at him. "I'm right here, that's not going to change, I'm not going anywhere but here, yeah? 1 minute. That's all. I'll be right back, you get settled, okay?", Ant kissed his hand, then hurried to the bathroom to come back as fast as he could.
Ant comes back soon enough, finding Dec sat up on the bed as if he was ready to leave it at any second if Ant took any longer. But as he entered the room, he observed Dec relax and shift his weight back into the sheets.
Ant climbed in beside him and lay down, offering his arms out to Dec, and, without words, he followed their invitation, settling on his chest, arms wrapped around the other side with Ant's arm around his shoulder, the other resting on Dec's forearm. He laid his head on top of Dec's, and for a few moments they simply lay there, breathing together.
"What happened?", Dec asked quietly, "Why couldn't you communicate to base?"
"Connection. At least- I think it was -- I dunno, they didn't say any different. They might tell us in the morning - if they've figured it out, we'll see."
"I told you I was worried about this," Dec half-complained, "How did you guys even know to come back?"
"Because we couldn't reach them. Though we weren't in any danger where we were, some of the guys suggested going back to make sure and to be safe, and everyone agreed." Ant took a breath. "Whether the whole thing was our fault or not, or if coming back was the wrong decision in the boss' eyes, any one of us would take whatever punishment they give to us rather than losing our lives- especially to those... things. We didn't ask for this, all we can do now is deal with it. But we're in this together. Every single one of us. And no one wants any bad to come to another, especially if it comes to their death. They wouldn't let that happen. I trust them with that, at least- it's one of the only things we can all share here."
Ant's words settled Dec's mind as he took it all in, re-thinking some areas of this place and the judgements he had on its people. If Ant thought he could trust these people, maybe he could too, more than he had been. On the missions he's been on so far, though Ant had been there with him every time, what he said made sense to their characters, and what they were willing to do for each other. Dec felt some of his fears slip away from his mind.
"M' sorry I worry so much.", Dec admitted sadly, but in full self-recognition. "I know you know why I do but, it's just how it is. I can't do this without you. I can't leave without you, either. I need you home, Ant, always."
Ant turned his head to look at him and smiled. "Wherever you are, that's where it'll be."
Dec looked up and met his eyes, smiling back. "Exactly.", He whispered.
The two rested their foreheads together and closed their eyes, smiles still lingering.
"I think... even for us, that was a little too cheesy.", Ant admitted.
Dec chuckled. "Just a corny way of saying I need you. Which I do, by the way, if you haven't noticed 32 years late."
They laughed together. "I know.", Ant said and met his gaze. "But you know I worry about you too, right? They told us when we got out that they let you guys know what happened, I immediately went to call you but you weren't answering, had to call Holly instead, to see what's going on."
"Yeah. I'm sorry, I left it on silent, wanted to get through the night in case...", Dec stopped himself, changing the subject, "I told her to wake me if they got any news."
"She said so on the phone, I told her not to."
"Why's that?"
"I was almost there and thought it would be better if I did instead, so you wouldn't have to wait."
"Mm. Was a nice surprise though."
Ant grinned, "What, waking up to my face?"
"Yeah-" Dec smirked playfully, " I'll get to tomorrow morning as well."
"Oh aye? Well we've set a terrible president."
They both shared a laugh again, but quieter this time for knowing Holly and Phil were either still downstairs, or in their own rooms. Both of them had been too distracted to know which it was.
"Shut up, you know you still look pretty after all these years."
There was no denying it, many people outside of just their friends and family had too shared the same opinion. But even so, it meant something different to hear that Dec still thought so, too.
"Quit flirting with me, Declan. You've had 32 years of chance with this.", He vaguely gestured to himself.
"Don't you worry, I've still got time, yet.", He winked.
Ant rolled his eyes, "Keep dreamin', darlin', Keep dreamin'."
"You wish.", Dec teased.
"You just want me to tell you you're pretty, don't you?"
Dec smiled. "Maybe."
Looking at Dec's little innocent face he was putting on, Ant couldn't resist. "You're very pretty, Declan."
"Thank you, love."
"You're welcome, pet.", Ant replied and kissed Dec's forehead.
Dec smiled into it, eyes closed, as Ant rested against his hair.
"We should sleep." Dec's smile faded. But he knew Ant was right. They'd have to eventually, as much as he wanted to stay awake cuddled with his best friend, chatting and joking and teasing while staying as close as he could, for as long as he could with him.
However long they had left, he didn't want to miss a second of it.
"Yeah. I'll get the light, hang on." Dec turned to his side opposite Ant and he loosed his hold to allow Dec to move and pull the small chain with a 'clink'.
As soon as darkness hit the room, Dec felt a wave of tension cease in his body, fear overwhelming him almost as much as it had just a couple hours ago, until a hand reached out to him.
"Hey, come 'ere, I've got you."
Dec laid in the position he was before, warmth surrounding him...
"It's okay, Love, I'm here. It's alright.", Ant whispered, as he softly stroked and played with Dec's hair, a method he knew worked to calm him, that he liked, and pressed few kisses into the top of it.
Dec closed his eyes. 'He's here, he's alive, he's alive and he's here with you. It's alright. Everything's going to be alright. He's okay.'
As a mix of Ant's words and Dec's own reminders played again and again in his head, and he felt Ant's hand over his shoulder and fingers threading through his hair in slow rhythms, and the upmost comfort of being so close laying on his chest like this, Dec's breathing normalised, and he began to relax, feeling increasingly tired and ready to fall asleep as the seconds passed them by.
Dec snuggled closer to Ant's side, burying himself in his neck while his arm held the other side gently. Ant smiled gratefully for the relaxation of his friend and held him as close in return, resting his head on top of Dec's.
"I love you.", Dec mumbled sleepily into Ant's skin.
"I love you too, darling."
They both shared one last smile, and drifted off to sleep together, peacefully, in the arms of the other, their smiles lasting throughout the whole night.