Kelendria
August 23rd, 2020
Today's the day, it's finally Sunday, and I can't even wait to eat Mama Tina's Cooking.
My mouth is watering just thinking about Mama Tina's Cooking.
I'm honestly surprised that I haven't even gained weight by eating my Mama's Cooking and especially Mama Tina's Cooking over The Years, but at the same exact time I am truly and honestly grateful that I didn't even gained that much weight.
Anyways I'm glad and happy that Mama Tina told me that I can bring a Dish to this Sunday Dinner.
I've been really really trying my best at being a Good Cook, and day by day I'm getting there, unlike Beyoncé.
Listen Beyoncé Giselle Knowles can't cook to save her life and she most definitely can't cook to save other people's lives either, and I'm honestly, truly and completely being deadass serious right now.
Like this one time I really tried to help Beyoncé try to cook, but that didn't even go too well at all.
I had to go to The Hospital and get my stomach pumped.
And from that day on I swore I wouldn't even and ever help Beyoncé cook or eat her Cooking ever in my life no matter if she's my bestie or not, or how much I love her.
Suddenly I then come right back into reality, once I feel my phone vibrate on my lap.
So I pick my phone up, only to see that I have multiple Text Messages from Onika, Lauren and Beyoncé.
I quickly unlock my phone by putting my password in.
I then go straight to iMessage.
I go to Onika and I's Text Thread first, while immediately texting her right back.
Onika and I text back and forth for a little bit til she texts me, telling me that she has to get ready.
So I then go right to Lauren and I's Text Thread, to text her.
Lauren and I text back and forth for a little bit til she texts me, telling me that she has to get ready.
And once I'm done texting Lauren, I go straight to Beyoncé and I's Text Thread, to text her.
Kelly: Hey BB.
BB Bear 🐻💛: Finally damn. It took you a whole Century and a half just to respond back to me. 🙄
Kelly: Pls stawp over exaggerating Giselle.
Kelly: It only took me a good thirty to forty minutes just to respond back to you cause I texted Onika and Lauren before you.
BB Bear 🐻💛: Woooooooooooooooow!!
BB Bear 🐻💛: Kelendria!!
BB Bear 🐻💛: Woooooooooooooooow!!
Kelly: What??
BB Bear 🐻💛: I am hurt that you texted them before you texted me.
Kelly: Beyoncé it's not even that deep.
BB Bear 🐻💛: THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID. 😏😭
Kelly: 🙄😭
BB Bear 🐻💛: But anyways Kelendria it is that deep cause I'm your bestie Kelly, you should have texted me before them.
Kelly: Onika and Lauren are my besties too you know that. I haven't seen or talked and or texted them in a Week or so, so we was just catching up, unlike you who I see, talk to and text every single day.
Kelly: Like I literally seen and hungout with you yesterday, AND I talked to you when you called me earlier today, earlier this Morning.
BB Bear 🐻💛: Okay okay. I get it.
Kelly: Do you, do you really Beyoncé? 🤔
BB Bear 🐻💛: Yeah yeah I get it Kelendria. 🙄
Kelly: So anyways what time are you, Broderick, Blue and Beauty going to your Parents House??
BB Bear 🐻💛: In about an hour or so.
BB Bear 🐻💛: Why?
BB Bear 🐻💛: Do you want me to pick you up?
Kelly: Yeah if you don't mind.
BB Bear 🐻💛: Yeah I got you, I don't mind.
BB Bear 🐻💛: Just be ready when I get to your House.
Kelly: I will.
BB Bear 🐻💛: Yeah right cause me and my Kids are gonna be waiting a whole Century for you in my Suburban.
Kelly: Overdramatic Face Ass. 🙄
BB Bear 🐻💛: Not even cause you do be taking that long to be getting ready and for what.
BB Bear 🐻💛: Like you females really be annoying me with doing that shit cause y'all don't even need no damm makeup just to eat Food.
Kelly: And I hate when you niggas complain when all we females do is look good for y'all when we don't even have to.
BB Bear 🐻💛: Oh ummmmm....
Kelly: Exactly your Dumb Face Ass don't really got shit to say now fr fr.
BB Bear 🐻💛: Whatever just be ready when I get there.
Kelly: I will.
Beyoncé and I text back and forth a little bit longer til we both agreed to get ready.
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Just as I walk down the stairs of my porch, Beyoncé finally pulls up in my driveway.
And this nigga had the audacity to say that I take Centuries on getting ready.
"Is that all you're taking." Beyoncé yells out to me as she quickly gets outta the driver's seat of her Suburban.
"Yeah, this all I'm taking, cause I got my phone in my pocket." I tell her.
Beyoncé hums in response as she quickly runs over to the passenger's side.
I smile as I walk over to the passenger's side.
Beyoncé quickly opens the passenger's door, once she seen me approaching the passenger's side.
"Hea hold these for a second." I tell Beyoncé as I hand her four big clear Tupperware Containers.
I then get in the passenger's seat, while I quickly fasten my seatbelt.
"Ight hea." Beyoncé says to me as she gently places the four big clear Tupperware Containers on my lap.
Beyoncé smiles at me as she then closes the passenger's door for me.
Beyoncé then quickly runs right back over to the driver's side, while immediately getting in and closing the door right behind her.
Beyoncé fastens her seatbelt, as she then puts her Suburban in reverse, backing outta my driveway.
Then once we're on the main road, Beyoncé puts her Suburban in drive.
Beyoncé then immediately drives in the direction of her Parents House.
"So, why didn't you wanna drive your own Car." Beyoncé asks me as she glances at me while then looking right back at the road.
"Cause you're my very own Chauffeur." I say to her as I look at the side of her face, smiling.
"Daddy's our Chauffeur too." Blue yells out causing me to laugh.
"Yeah." Broderick yells out, agreeing with Blue.
"Y'all are so hilarious, really y'all are." Beyoncé says to us in a sarcastic tone.
"We know we are Daddy." Blue says to Beyoncé.
"Blue be quiet and just focus on your iPad." Beyoncé tells Blue as she continues driving.
"Giselle, don't be telling my Blue Blue to be quiet." I say to her.
"Thanks Kells Kells." Blue says to me.
Beyoncé sucks her teeth as she mumbles somethang under her breath.
"Of course Blue Blue, you know I always got you." I tell Blue as I turn, while looking back at her.
Blue looks up from her iPad, while looking right at me.
Blue smiles at me as she then looks right back down at her iPad.
I then turn right back around in my seat, facing forward.
"What took you so long to get to my House." I ask Beyoncé, breaking the silence between us.
Beyoncé blows a loud breath out as she lightly shakes her head.
"Beauty was acting up, plus I had to change her outfit a couple of times, and plus Blue and Broderick was taking their sweet ole time getting ready, cause they were too deep into their Tv Screens and or they was too busy being on their iPads." Beyoncé tells me.
"Awh poor BB." I say to her as I try holding in my laughter.
"Yeah, poor BB is right." Beyoncé says.
"Those Kids was really testing my patience forreal forreal." She adds.
"Soooooo, anyways what are you most excited to eat today." I ask Beyoncé, changing the topic.
I know Beyoncé too damn good, so I know when to change the topic so that she doesn't even get too irritated and or just mad.
"Most definitely Mama's Mac and Cheese." Beyoncé tells me while licking her lips.
"Her Mac and Cheese has been calling my name and number ever since last Sunday Dinner." She adds.
"Please, not name and number." I say as I burst out laughing loudly.
Beyoncé glances at me while smiling, as she then quickly looks right back at the road.
"Yeah, I'm being deadass serious tho, like Mama's Mac and Cheese even tried to reach me by Email." Beyoncé tells me.
I laugh even more and harder.
Tears rapidly rolls down my cheeks.
Beyoncé continues to make me laugh as she continues driving us into the direction of her Parents House.
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As Beyoncé finally pulls up into her Parents driveway, I see Solange and Lauren's Car.
"I see that Solange and Lauren are already hea." I say to Beyoncé as she finally pulls up into a free space and parks her Suburban.
"Yeah." Is all Beyoncé says.
"But obviously not Robyn and Onika, cause you already know Onika be making them late to everythang, and I mean every single thang, every single time." Beyoncé says through her light laughter.
Beyoncé turns her head, only to be looking right at me.
"You know, Onika is really the one who actually Invented BPT." Beyoncé tells me.
I bursts out laughing.
"You right, you right." I tell Beyoncé through my laughter.
Beyoncé smiles at me as she then puts her Suburban in park, while she then immediately turns the key into the ignition, turning the engine off.
Beyoncé takes her key outta the ignition as she quickly unfastens her seatbelt.
Beyoncé then quickly opens her door, while getting out.
"Are those my Babies." I hear Mama Tina's voice.
I quickly turn my head forward, only to see Mama Tina walking towards Beyoncé's Suburban.
"Beyoncé, I got Beauty, you just get my other Grandbabies outta that Suburban, then get those big clear Tupperware Containers that's in Kelly's lap and I want you to bring them in The House and into the kitchen." Mama Tina tells Beyoncé.
"Yes Mama." I hear Beyoncé say to Mama Tina.
I then hear a kissing sound.
I already know that Beyoncé just kissed Mama Tina's cheek.
"Okay, Blue and Broderick get your iPads and the charges that came with them and get out and go into The House." I hear Beyoncé telling Blue and Broderick.
"Okay Dad." I hear Blue and Broderick say to Beyoncé.
Then next thang I hear is doors being opened and closed.
And suddenly I then hear and see the passenger's door is being yanked opened.
"Ight, lemme get this from you Kells." Beyoncé says to me as she carefully takes the four big clear Tupperware Containers from off my lap.
Beyoncé then leans down and kisses my cheek.
I blush.
"That was real bold of you, Giselle." I tell her.
"I know and I know you loved it too." Beyoncé says to me as she winks at me.
I smile as I playfully roll my eyes at her.
I then get out, while closing the passenger's door behind me.
Anyways once all the doors are closed to Beyoncé's Suburban, Mama Tina who is holding Beauty's Carseat with Beauty in it, Blue, Broderick, Beyoncé and I all walk to the front door of The House.
"Mama, you want me to hold Beauty's Carseat for you, cause it looks like you need help." Beyoncé says to Mama Tina.
"Beyoncé, I got this. I know how to hold a Carseat with a Baby in it chile." Mama Tina tells Beyoncé.
"I mean, I did hold a Carseat with you and Solange in The Carseats when y'all were Babies, then I held another Carseat with Robyn in it when she was a Baby." Mama Tina tells Beyoncé.
"Damn okay, I was just asking Mama." Beyoncé says to Mama Tina.
"And I was just telling you that I know how to hold a Carseat Giselle." Mama Tina says to Beyoncé.
"Okay Mama." Is all Beyoncé says to her.
"Wait, Mama. Do you have Beauty's Bag that's full of the stuff that she needs." Beyoncé asks Mama Tina.
"Yeah, do you not get see the strap of her Bag hanging off my shoulder." Mama Tina says to Beyoncé.
Beyoncé glances at Mama Tina, while lightly nodding her head.
"I do now." Beyoncé tells her.
We all finally walk right into The House and we're immediately greeted by Matthew, Solange and Lauren, all except for Robyn and Onika cause obviously they're not here yet.
"I told you. Robyn and Onika are always the last ones." Beyoncé tells me as she looks at me with a knowing look on her face.
I smile at her as I playfully roll my eyes.
"I know, I been knew that." I say to her.
Beyoncé hums in response as she then walks away, walking right in the direction of the kitchen, and Blue, Broderick and their Cousin Lommán rush to The Playroom that Matthew and Mama Tina had some Construction Workers build for them.
Anyways the rest of us walk right to the living room.
We all find seats once we're in the living room.
Beauty makes this cute sound once Mama Tina takes her outta her Carseat, and we all awe.
"Beauty, really is such a beauty." Lauren says as she gushes over Beauty.
We all agree with Lauren, wholeheartedly.
"Solange and Lauren, when are y'all gonna give us another GrandBaby." Mama Tina asks them as she looks right at them.
I'm trying so hard to hold my laughter in cause the looks on both Solange and Lauren's faces are priceless as fuck right now, just hilarious.
And just as Solange is about to say somethang Robyn and Onika finally walks into the living room with bottles of Wine.
The sigh of relief that Solange and Lauren just let out at the same exact time tho.
"Hey y'all." Onika says to all of us as she looks around.
"Y'all are late." Mama Tina says to Robyn and Onika as she looks at them.
"Well Mama, it's Onika's fault why we're late." Robyn says to Mama Tina.
"Like she had to take Centuries on top of Centuries getting ready, putting on some makeup." She adds as she rolls her eyes.
"You always gotta be snitching on me." Onika says to Robyn as she rolls her eyes at her.
"The shit be annoying right." Beyoncé says to Robyn as she walks into the living room.
"Beyoncé Language chile." Mama Tina says to her.
"Ooooops my bad Mama." Beyoncé says to her.
"But that be annoying tho right." Beyoncé asks Robyn again.
"Hella annoying." Robyn says as she rolls her eyes.
"I'm saying tho." Beyoncé says to Robyn.
"Like I was just talking about this subject today with Kelly." Beyoncé tells Robyn.
"And I got you to be on hush mode, so be quiet right now." I say to Beyoncé as I give her a look.
Everyone laughs as Beyoncé sucks her teeth and rolls her eyes at me.
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"Okay, okay so who's gonna say Grace." Mama Tina asks as she around the table.
"I mean......it's only fair that Beyoncé says Grace since I said Grace last Sunday Dinner." Solange says to Mama Tina.
"And I said Grace on The Sunday Dinner before that Mama." Robyn says to Mama Tina.
"Okay, and." Mama Tina says to them.
"All I know is that someone better say Grace now, right this very minute, right this very second, so that we can eat this Food." Matthew says.
Preach Matthew, you tell them.
"I'll say Grace then." Beyoncé says, a few minutes later.
"Now let's bow our heads and close our eyes, and join hands." Beyoncé tells us.
We all bow our heads, while closing our eyes and grab ahold of each other's hands.
Beyoncé clears her throat.
"Dear Heavenly Father In Heaven, we thank you for this lovely Meal that my Mama so gracefully has prepared for us today and we also thank you for the delicious Food that Kelly has prepared and brought to us, please help all this delicious Food be Nourishment for our bodies, we love and appreciate you God always, in Jesus Name, Amen." Beyoncé says, finishing saying Grace.
"Amen." We all say in unison as we all lift up our heads and open our eyes.
We all then let go of each other's hands, while we start making our own plates.
I immediately eat Mama Tina's Mac and Cheese, which causes me to smile so big.
God I love Mama Tina's Mac and Cheese.
"I see that you're really loving my Mac and Cheese Kells." Mama Tina says to me as she looks at me, while smiling.
I chew a couple more times as I then swallow it, while I then talk.
"Most definitely, you know your Mac and Cheese is my soulmate, like truly." I tell Mama Tina.
"Chile, stawp before you make me blush." Mama Tina says to me.
"Kells, speaks the truth Mama." Beyoncé, Solange and Robyn says to Mama Tina at the same time.
Everyone agrees with me, Beyoncé, Solange and Robyn.
"Tina, Honey. You know your Mac and Cheese is one of the reasons why I fell in love with you." Matthew say to her.
"Awe, Sweetheart." Tina says to Matthew as they kiss.
"Okay, ew people are eating hea." Beyoncé, Solange and Robyn says at the same time, while making gagging noises.
"Exactly." Blue, Broderick and Lommán yell out as they make gagging noises.
Matthew and Mama Tina laugh in their kiss as they then pull away.
"Okay, so what's new with everyone." Mama Tina asks as she takes a bite outta her Greens.
One by one everyone starts saying how their Week has been and what's new with them.
"Okay, so I'm working on this Music Video for one of my Songs that's on my Debut Album, right......." Onika starts to say.
We all just say right, agreeing with her as we look at Onika, waiting for her to continue.
"Well anyways, tell me how this nig-...I mean man who is my Backup Dancer was dancing all up on me, all up in my personal space." Onika tells us as she rolls her eyes.
"And that man had the audacity to ask me out, like boy please." Onika says as she rolls her eyes again.
"But it was a good thang that I walked in when it happened, and handled it like a real nigga should have." Robyn tells us as she smiles.
"Robyn Language." Mama Tina scolds Robyn.
"My bad Mama." Robyn says to Mama Tina.
"Anyways how did you handle it Rob." Beyoncé asks her.
Onika starts blushes, which causes us to get even more curious on how Robyn handle the situation.
"I walked up to them real calm and cool, I clear my throat as I then told Onika that I brought her some Dinner cause I know that she wasn't even gonna leave til her Music Video was done and perfect, with her overly Perfectionist Self." Robyn starts to say.
Onika rolls her eyes at Robyn.
"Anyways, the man wasn't even getting the message loud enough, so I had to turn the message up so loud, so I grabbed Onika's hips and I yanked her towards me, I leaned down and I kissed her with so much confidence and with so much possession." Robyn tells us.
"He got so tight that he stomped away all mad." She adds while smiling.
"Proud of you Rob." Matthew says to Robyn.
"Thanks Pops." Robyn says to Matthew as they highfive each other.
Beyoncé and Solange give Robyn a highfive, while telling her that they're proud of her and that they would have done the exact same thang if they were her.
"And in that moment, that honestly had me speechless and so wet." Onika says.
Beyoncé, Solange, Lauren, Robyn and I smirk, already knowing what was up.
"How, when no one spilled water on you Auntie Nicki." Blue says to Onika.
"Me and my big mouth chile." Onika says to herself.
"Exactly." Robyn says to her.
Onika elbows Robyn as she then looks right back at Blue.
Mama Tina, Matthew, Beyoncé, Solange, Lauren, Robyn and I all look at Onika.
We wait to see how she's gonna explain this to Blue and well to the other two Kids, since they were already looking at Onika.
"Well, Blue you see, in that moment Rob Rob kissed me, making that man jealous and mad, causing him come right back and throw water on us." Onika tells Blue.
Mama Tina, Matthew, Beyoncé, Solange, Lauren, Robyn and I look at Onika while lightly laughing.
"Nice save." I whisper to Onika.
"Oooooh, okay then." Blue says.
"He never really had a chance with you anyways Auntie Nicki." Blue says to her while smiling.
"And DOESN'T." Onika says to Blue as she gives her a highfive.
We continue eating til Mama Tina starts talking.
"So, when am I gonna get some more GrandBabies." Mama Tina asks as she looks at Beyoncé, Solange and Robyn.
"Cause, I've been having Dreams about some Fish for a whole Month now." Mama Tina adds.
What's with these Black GrandMamas and Mamas with these damn Fish Dreams.
"Well, I got a dic....I mean I got a penis so I can't get Pregnant, I can get someone Pregnant, I'm just waiting on my soulmate to come face the truth and be with me so I can get her Pregnant." Beyoncé tells Mama Tina as she looks right at me.
Solange, Lauren, Robyn and Onika start instigating saying yeah I know right and that's the truth, while I choke on my drink, cause that caught me all the way offguard.
Beyoncé pats my back as I continue to cough.
And once I stop coughing and getting my breathing back under control, Beyoncé stops patting my back as she then looks right back at Mama Tina.
"But, you and Pops has 3 GrandBabies from me." Beyoncé says to Mama Tina as she puts a spoonful of Cheesy Mashed Potatos in her mouth.
"You gotta a GrandBaby outta Lauren and I." Solange tells Mama Tina.
"Well, I'm waiting for my Babygirl Onika to give me The Signal." Robyn says to Mama Tina.
"And I'm waiting for Robyn to Propose and Marry me, so that I can give her a Baby, cause I wanna do it the right way." Onika says.
"I know that's right." Mama Tina says to Onika as she gives her a highfive.
We all look at Lauren to say somethang, but she has this look on her face.
"Lauren, Sweetheart.....what's wrong." Mama Tina asks her.
Lauren sighs as she then takes a few deep breaths.
"Mama Tina, Matthew....I'm so so very sorry...." Lauren starts to say as she sniffles.
"That you're gonna be planning a lot more stuff cause you're gonna be having another GrandBaby." Lauren says as she places a Ultrasound Picture on an empty spot on the table.
Mama Tina and Matthew just stare at Solange and Lauren for a few more moments before they cheer loudly.
"Now y'all was way wrong for scarying us half to death, we really thought somethang was really wrong." Matthew says to Solange and Lauren as he looks at them.
"It was Solange's idea." Lauren says as she grabs The Ultrasound Picture.
"Snitch." Solange says to Lauren as she rolls her eyes at her.
"Well Solange is gonna be the one to get ha mothafucking ass beat beat." Mama Tina says.
"Old School Style at that." She adds.
"Ooooooou." Matthew, Beyoncé, Robyn, Onika, Lauren and I say at the same time, just instigating.
Mama Tina doesn't really cuss like that, so when she does, you know that she's very very serious.
"Mama, I'm an Adult. You can't whoop me no more." Solange says to Mama Tina.
"Chile, I don't care if you're an Adult or not, so you still can get ya ass beat." Mama Tina says to Solange.
Solange sucks her teeth as she rolls her eyes while mumbling stuff under her breath.
"So Lauren, how far along are you in your Pregnancy." Mama Tina asks Lauren.
"I'm 1 Month." Lauren tells Mama Tina as she smiles so big and bright.
We all cheer while clapping and genuinely smiling.
"I'm so glad my Dreams never lie." Mama Tina says as she genuinely smiles.
"Exactly Honey, I'm also so glad your Dreams never lie." Matthew says to Mama Tina as he pulls her into a kiss.
"Yeah okay, ew there are still people eating hea." Beyoncé, Solange and Robyn says at the same time, while making gagging noises.
"Exactly, seriously." Blue, Broderick and Lommán yell out as they make gagging noises.
Matthew and Mama Tina laugh in their kiss as they then pull away, while they shake their heads.
"Y'all are just haters." Matthew says to Beyoncé, Solange and Robyn through his light laughter.
"Pops, ain't no one even hating we just don't even wanna see that." Beyoncé says to Matthew.
"Yeah, forreal forreal tho. Cause we seen that all the time Growing Up." Solange says.
"Plus, why would I hate when I got a baddie as my Wife." Solange adds as she kisses Lauren's cheek.
"Exactly, like we definitely don't even needa be seeing y'all kissing anymore." Robyn says as she looks at Matthew and Mama Tina.
"And yeah, why would I even hate when I got a baddie as my Girlfriend." Robyn adds as she kisses Onika's cheek.
"And we just don't need to see y'all kissing at all cause that's so so very very gross." Brooklyn says to his GrandParents as he looks at them.
"Exactly. Preach Pastor Broderick." Blue and Lommán says to Broderick.
Broderick, Blue and Lommán all say that now, but wait til they get to their Teenage Years, they're really gonna be a different different breed, which will be giving Beyoncé, Solange and Lauren grey hairs.
I lightly laugh at my thought.
Anyways Mama Tina, Matthew, Beyoncé, Solange, Lauren, Robyn, Onika and I all then talk amongst ourselves while still eating our Food, and The Kids talk amongst themselves while they continue eating.