For over a year Winnie Marth had known Kaz Brekker.
In that year she had experienced emotions like no other.
She had felt pain, anger, sadness, hopelessness, turmoil, and rejection before. Her father had made sure of that. But when it came to Kaz, she had felt all those things too. But it was different.
Every emotion she had felt as a result of the Bastard of the Barrel had been because of the one she had felt most strongly. Love.
She had come to understand the hard way that love was just as dangerous as all the others, if not more so.
It twisted the way you saw things, the way you acted, the way you spoke, the way you lived.
Winnie knew she couldn't afford to have something control her like that. Especially in Ketterdam. It was a weakness. It could place her into situations she wouldn't survive. It almost already had.
That's why the moment she just shared with Kaz in his office scared her.
She was never sure of his feelings towards her, but one day months ago he had made it clear that he saw her as replaceable, a stone in his shoe that he didn't have time to remove and so learnt to deal with.
So why did he lean in too?
Such questions were dangerous to ponder over. The things she had shoved deep down into the depths of her heart could come rushing back out. And this was the absolute worst time for that to happen.
She needed to stay sharp and focused on the job at hand. On not getting herself captured by her father again. On keeping her darkness at bay despite the constant temptations that she would experience in Ravka to unleash it.
As her and Kaz walked over to Jesper, they remained in silence. Both clearly wanting to leave whatever had just happened in the past.
"Jesper! New job", Kaz shouted out as they approached him.
Winnie noticed Jesper appeared to have been in a conversation but seeing as no one was standing in front of him made her wonder who. Could it have been Inej? Why was she talking to Jesper? Knowing Jesper though, it was most likely he was simply talking to himself, so she refrained from asking him what he was doing.
The minutes that went by walking closer and closer to the Emerald Palace allowed Winnie to collect herself.
She pushed away any thoughts or feelings she was having surrounding Kaz Brekker and tuned into whatever nonsense Jesper was spurting out.
"I mean it. We need a demo man", Jesper was requesting.
"Not this again", Winnie sighed as she walked alongside the sharpshooter, Kaz just a few steps ahead of them.
"You ask for an explosives expert on every job", Kaz muttered.
"Because I don't want to be the one you point to and say explode something for us. That is not a Jesper talent", Jesper complained.
"And what exactly is a Jesper talent?" Winnie questioned.
"If I'm remembering correctly, you would know exactly what my talents are", Jesper said to Winnie with a small wink.
Of course, he was referring to a drunken night shared by the two friends. It had led to them sleeping together and it was something neither one regretted but had both agreed would never happen again.
Since Kaz had his back turned to the two, neither one saw him clench his jaw and tighten his grip on his cane at the mention of their shared night.
Kaz hadn't exactly had the best reaction to hearing about it at the time and refrained himself from commenting on it ever again.
"Look, I shoot things with style, and I look good. Just play to my strengths, boss", Jesper eventually said after receiving nothing but an eye roll from Winnie.
"Alina Starkov will be kept at the Little Palace. Entering it will require us to be quiet. If we're blowing something up, we've likely failed", Kaz responded.
"Then we should take Inej", Winnie chimed in, not wanting Kaz to forget about the way he had left things with her.
"She's a good investment. More quiet then he'll ever be", she continued, gesturing to Jesper.
"She can't stay here, you know that."
Kaz ignored her and continued walking ahead.
"Hang on", Jesper stopped the two by holding his arms out. "Aren't we on Pekka's turf now?"
"I go to Heleen now and ask for her buyout, she knows I need Inej and sets a price I can't pay", Kaz explained.
"That's evil. How do you know that?" Jesper asked.
"It's what he would do", Winnie said moving past the two boys.
"Inej refuses to kill. Would you trust her in a matter of life and death?" Kaz said.
"Always", Winnie turned around to respond immediately, her tone serious and stern.
"Well, I've trusted her so far and I'm still alive, so, yeah", Jesper added.
Kaz glanced between the two, acknowledging that they made their positions clear.
"Now, either of you want to tell me why we're scoping out a rival club?" Jesper asked.
"To have a talk with an old business partner", Kaz replied.
"I'm simply going to have a catch up with a friend", Winnie added.
Poppy was one of the few people in the Dime Lions who showed her any kindness during her time there. They had helped her through one of her darkest moments and had taught her a few fashion tips and tricks she desperately needed.
Kaz and Jesper shot her a look before Jesper said, "The bouncers will know both of you on sight."
"That's why we bought you", Kaz said.
"Our little distraction", Winnie added as she tipped Jesper's hat slightly.
"Make sure they don't see us", Kaz said as he and Winnie walked towards the Emerald Palace.
"Handsome decoy is also not a Jesper talent", Jesper said as he straightened his hat back to normal.
Winnie knew her way around the Emerald Palace and so took the lead in front of Kaz.
They clung themselves close to the walls as Jesper tricked the bouncers with a shot to one of the signs.
Winnie had to hold back laughter as she heard Jesper toying with the bouncers. At one point she failed and let out a small scoff which earned her a smack from Kaz's cane to the back of her leg.
Eventually they made it through the doors and walked through the hallways.
Winnie felt her heart start to race. She kept herself hidden in her shadows as anyone around could recognise her and run to tell Pekka a certain shadow summoner was roaming around his gambling den.
"How are you faring?" Kaz whispered as they turned a corner away from anyone's sight.
Winnie let herself appear behind him and replied "fine" in the most convincing tone she could muster.
She had recognised some of the doors to rooms she was held in during her time here. What had happened in those rooms was something that she had nightmares about to this day.
Kaz noticed the slight break in her voice but decided the best thing to do for her was to get her out as quickly as possible and so he opened the door to Poppy's dressing room.
"Boris, would you ..." Poppy said as they turned around to see who had entered the room.
The dressing room was covered with eccentric items and clothes. It was painted the Dime Lions signature colour of green which matched the dress Poppy was currently sporting.
"It's been a while, Poppy", Kaz spoke.
Poppy reached out and grabbed a small gun, pointing it in his direction.
"I see you're still upset", Kaz remarked.
"At you, not her. But maybe a little at her seeing the state of her makeup. I thought I taught you better, Win", Poppy said.
Winnie hadn't had much chance to tend to her looks and knew that the stress of the last couple of hours was very visible on her face.
She gave a small smile in Poppy's direction before walking around to greet her.
"As for you, you stole my shares of the Crow Club", Poppy added keeping their gun pointed at Kaz.
"It wasn't stealing. It was just a raw deal. Most deals in the barrel are", Kaz uttered.
Poppy turned to look at Winnie who gave a confirming smile, causing them to lower the gun.
"I don't believe you've come here with the likes of him to have a touch-up", Poppy addressed their friend.
"No. But a touch-up from you does sound nice", Winnie commented.
Poppy reached onto the vanity in front of them and grabbed some powder before gesturing for Winnie to come closer.
"What do you want, Dirtyhands?" Poppy asked as they begun making amends to Winnie's exhausted looking face.
"I need to find someone. Or at least learn how to find them, tonight", Kaz started.
"Looking for a club act, are we?" Poppy responded moving onto Winnie's lips.
"I'm looking for the Conductor", Kaz said.
Poppy stopped working on Winnies face and their face went cold.
"You know him?" Winnie asked.
"This is about a job, isn't it? One that sends you all the way east for a million kruge? You'll never make enough to compete with Pekka, you know?" Poppy started as they returned their focus onto Winnies lips.
"He's a king. You're just the Bastard of the Barrel", Poppy finished with both their words and Winnie's touch-up.
The shadow summoner got up from her crouched position and stared into Poppy's mirror analysing the work they had done.
She always loved the way Poppy could make her look. They had the ability to hide the true pain, pure exhaustion, and scars from her face. She had only wished Poppy had been around back during her time at the Little Palace.
One night Winnie had smashed every single mirror in her room as she was tired from the pain bought on from looking at herself. The fresh wounds and old scars only taunted her, reminding her of all the hurtful words her father had said and the torture he had submitted her to that day and the next.
He had never allowed her to be tailored, despite her protests. Claiming they should serve their purpose as reminders of her failures.
At this point, Winnie was so scarred both externally and internally that it would take a miracle to reverse all the scars plastered on her body.
Besides, she had come to like some of them. They were a part of her now. Just as much as her arms or her legs were.
But she allowed herself her face to be fixed up. After all, it was the first thing people saw when they looked at another person. She was still just a teenage girl at the roots and what teenage girl doesn't want to look pretty?
Poppy could give her that more than anyone she had known could.
She smiled at herself and turned to give Poppy a much-needed hug.
"Thank you", she whispered in their ear as she hugged them tightly.
"Anything for my favourite shadow summoner", Poppy whispered back.
Whilst they were distracted with their embrace, Kaz had found a note containing the symbol for the Menagerie.
"Tante Heleen wrote you?" he asked which made Winnie pull away from Poppy and take a step behind them.
"Just this evening, yes, you snoop", Poppy replied as they returned to doing their own makeup.
"She was asking about the conductor as well. Probably about the same job. So I warned him to steer clear of her."
Kaz and Winnie shared a look showing they both understood what that must mean.
"You warned him? With a note?" Winnie asked concerned.
Poppy gave her a small nod.
"She wanted you to do that so she could have the messenger followed", Kaz explained.
"She wouldn't hurt him, would she?" Poppy asked.
"She would if it meant hurting me", Kaz said as he took a step in their direction.
"Pops, if you have any loyalty to him, tell us where he is", Winnie said calmly.
Poppy immediately grabbed a pencil and paper and jotted down an address before handing it to Winnie who looked up at Kaz and gave him a nod, letting him know she knew where he was.
As they turned to leave, Poppy stopped them.
They walked up to Winnie and took her hands.
"Be careful, Win. You may be one of the most badass and scary people I know but this job sounds dangerous. Especially since you have to cross the Fold. I can only imagine how hard this will all be for you", they said in a caring tone.
"I'll be fine. When I get back, I'll come straight to you so you can make amends to all the horrors that will plague my face from Ravka", Winnie replied.
"I'll look forward to it", Poppy said as they pulled her in for a final hug.
Winnie smiled slightly into her friend's shoulder before releasing them and turning to leave.
"Look after her", Poppy said to Kaz, their tone almost protective in nature.
Kaz nodded and followed Winnie to find the Conductor.
__________<>__________
The two business partners walked with speed through the Ketterdam streets as Kaz was surprisingly fast on his feet considering his limp.
They were both secretly hoping that Inej's religious mindset had prevented her from doing anything irreversible before they got there.
Winnie, however, was unknowingly holding them behind ever so slightly as whenever she caught a small glimpse of her newly done-up face in a mirror or glass ornament for sale she paused briefly as if she couldn't believe it was her own face staring back at her.
"I didn't take you as someone so vain", Kaz said noticing her repeated glances.
"Neither did I. But Poppy works miracles, and those miracles need to be acknowledged", Winnie replied with a small smile.
"I wouldn't call it a miracle. You looked better before, anyway", Kaz muttered as he increased his pace.
Winnie didn't hear his comment as she was too busy looking into a cracked window of one of the houses.
"Marth, come on!" Kaz yelled back at her.
Winnie snapped out of it and ran to catch up with him, realizing that they had made it to the conductor supposed address.
"How do you want to play this?" she asked.
"He's a man with no known loyalties to any one gang. We'll be safe if we just walk in there", Kaz replied.
Winnie nodded and opened the door to step inside.
They walked up a few flights of stairs before reaching his room. They heard a man whimpering from inside which made them both feel relief that Inej hadn't yet betrayed her faith.
Winnie opened the door to see the conductor tied to a chair lying on his back with Inej holding up one of her knives about to release it into his neck.
"Don't", Kaz shouted.
Inej immediately turned and threw the knife in their direction. Winnie quickly crossed her hands in front of her face which summoned a wall of shadows, causing the knife to hit them and fall onto the floor.
Kaz and Winnie both had a slightly shocked expression on their faces which matched the one Inej was wearing.
"He's our way to Alina Starkov", Kaz explained carefully upon seeing Inej was still holding a knife to the man's neck.
"Heleen knew it. She was using you to sabotage our mission", Winnie added, taking a step towards her friend.
Inej shook her head. "She and I made a deal."
"It isn't worth more than what we get with him alive", Kaz said.
Inej turned to face him, anger and sadness in her eyes. "You choose him over my freedom?"
Winnie looked at Kaz.
For once, don't say something stupid.
"You assume it's one or the other", he replied.
Inej turned back to the conductor and hesitated. Winnie had no idea if her trust in Kaz stretched this far. She had been offered her freedom. Nothing should take that away from her.
But Inej drew her knife away from his neck, leaving behind a small cut.
Kaz and Winnie both let out a breath of relief before Kaz walked over to where Inej was standing above the restrained man.
"Conductor, I have a job for you."
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OK OK OK so idk I just hope you guys are liking it so far <3
I tried to get Poppy's pronouns right but if I slipped up at all please let me know and I'll make any edits accordingly :)