Yes, I would agree that JJ was always there for me, but not since I came back from rehab. He's changed from being my best friend.
JJ and I make eye contact for what feels like hours. His eyes were cold, I've never seen him this way before.
"Yeah, well uh-" JJ says.
I could tell he was trying not to cry by the way he was sniffing and looking away from me.
"I'm right here." he laughs, looking around.
"Lets just go." I hear John B saying to Kiara as she shakes her head.
"I'm sorry, okay?" JJ admits.
"But you can't just keep overdosing."
"It hurts me too, you know?"
I look next to me, seeing Rafe laughing at JJ.
"And he's a fucking psycho!" JJ shouts, pointing to Rafe.
"I even went to your fucking dad for help." he laughs.
"And you know what happened." JJ says.
What? How could he do that to JJ. He knows I grew up with him. JJ's stayed over when my dad was sober. He knew JJ.
None of the other pogues even had a conversation with him because I was scared of what he could do. I couldn't believe it.
"I didn't know that." I mumble.
"Yeah, why would you?" he shrugs.
"Look- Gia, we love you." Kiara says.
"But you can't keep doing this to us." she states.
"To you?" I nod.
"Yeah." John B says.
"I'm not doing shit to you." I laugh.
"It affects us too!" Kiara states.
"Here you go again." I continue laughing.
"You only ever think about yourself." I say.
"That's not true, Gia." my mom steps in.
Shit, I forgot she was here and that she was supposedly sending me to rehab.
"You know what?" I shrug.
"I'm just gonna go off, by myself. Like always." I say, walking away.
"Cause you don't need us, right?" John B shouts.
I was thinking of replying with 'fuck off' or 'shut up', but I was so tired of the arguments. I was exhausted.
"Gia get back here!" I hear my mom shout.
~
I've ran far enough so the pogues and my mom wouldn't see me. I take a few breaths when I reach an isolated place, panting as I do.
I was going to go to Barrys. I couldn't take this shit anymore. I'll just overdose on more than I did before and be gone. And then everyone will love me again once I'm dead, right?
And of course, I hear footsteps behind me.
"Hey!" the familiar voice shouts.
I turn around to see Rafe, and I sigh.
"I just wanna be alone right now?" I mutter.
"You mean you're gonna go get drugs?"
I scoff, looking around the environment I was standing in because I didn't know how to reply.
"Let me help you." he reassures me.
"I don't think that's possible." I pursed my lips.
"I think it is." he shrugs.
"Why are you being so nice to me?" I laugh.
"Because."
"Because?"
"I don't like people." he says.
I was confused at his answer, until he
finished it.
"But I like you, somehow." he goes on.
Rafe liked me? But as a friend, or more? Whatever it was, my stomach filled with butterflies and a smile appeared on my lips.
"Look, how about we do something?" he changes the subject almost immediately.
"Like?"
"Get out of this fucking island."
I smile at the idea. But negative thoughts always hit me.
"And when would we leave?" I roll my eyes sarcastically.
"Now."
"I'm broke. I can't just go anywhere."
"Well I'm not."
"Yeah, I know that." I roll my eyes, not understanding.
"No- I mean I'll pay." he chuckles.
That smile. I never saw it often, but I wanted to see it more. It showed the pureness in him.
"What, so you're like my sugar daddy?" I laugh.
"Guess you could say that." he smiles.
I smile back. I stand on my tip-toes, gently pulling his face down whilst my hand cupped his jaw, kissing him on the cheek.
I could never make the first move of actually kissing him, I would be too afraid of rejection.
I stand back on my own feet, seeing him smirk and lick his lips, his eyes beaming at me.
"Thank you." I say.
"For what?"
"For being there."
That look he was giving me, the way he was slowly leaning towards me, the sparkle in his eyes made it clear he was about to kiss me.
And just like that, his lips slowly join with mine, kissing me softly, enjoying every minute of it as he cups my face in his hands, not breaking the kiss. My hands glide to the back of his head, feeling his silky hair.
We both break from the kiss slowly, looking into each others eyes whilst our noses were still touching, smiling into each others mouths.
I couldn't wait to spend a day or a few with Rafe. He made me feel, happy?
"Lets go." he whispers into my mouth, giving me a brief kiss before we pull away.
He takes my hand in his, as we walk to the Cameron house to take Rafe's Jeep.
I didn't know what this thing we had was, but I couldn't get enough of it. He made me better.