𝑪𝒉𝒐𝒔𝒆𝒏 𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒓(𝒔): 𝑳𝒐𝒌𝒊 𝑳𝒂𝒖𝒇𝒆𝒚𝒔𝒐𝒏 - 𝑻𝒐𝒎 𝑯𝒊𝒅𝒅𝒍𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒏, 𝑻𝒐𝒏𝒚 𝑺𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒌 - 𝑹𝒐𝒃𝒆𝒓𝒕 𝑫𝒐𝒘𝒏𝒆𝒚 𝑱𝒓
ꨄ︎
𝑻𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒈𝒆𝒓 𝑾𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 𝑰𝒏𝒄𝒍𝒖𝒅𝒆:
𝑫𝒆𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒊𝒐𝒏
𝑹𝒆𝒇𝒖𝒔𝒂𝒍 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒂𝒌𝒆 𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒐𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇
𝑰'𝒎 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒔𝒖𝒓𝒆 𝒊𝒇 𝑰 𝒈𝒐𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒎 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒔𝒐 𝒊𝒇 𝑰 𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒅 𝒂𝒏𝒚, 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍 𝒇𝒓𝒆𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒍 𝒎𝒆.
ꨄ︎
𝑪𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅𝒏'𝒕 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒅 𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒊𝒔𝒕 𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒊𝒏.
ꨄ︎
Loud aggressive beeps bounced around the walls as the time hit 10 am. Loki groaned in annoyance before throwing his arm over his face. Keeping his eyes shut, he began to angerly smash the alarm clock buttons. Sitting upright, the god rubbed his eyes obscurely. He felt dry tears on his face and noticed how they went sideways to one of his ears. This led him to two conclusions. 1. He must have slept on his side, and 2. He must have had another nightmare.
They've been getting more frequent. The nightmares. They tainted his mind and filled his head with violent thoughts. They whispered constantly. Their raspy disembodied voice croaked in his ear. Flashes of gruesome images sparked across his vision, plaguing his view.
Rising for his bed with a groan, Loki noticed how hungry he felt. The god had been eating less throughout the recent days, eating nothing more than a few apples or other fruits. Everything was just growing too much.
Loki began to leave his bedroom, and his stomach ached with hunger. A few avengers were in the kitchen, standing around the counter conversing. Loki paid the others no mind and went to grab an apple from the fridge.
Steve was speaking with Natasha and Clint about nothing in particular. The other two didn't bother to acknowledge the god that had walked in, yet Steve looked over. He was about to greet the man before he noticed the physical appearance Loki.
Loki had heavy eyebags that tainted his pale skin. Once full lips were now cracked and had almost lost all its color. Those previous vibrant green eyes seemed to have dulled. His face had dry tears that traced his sharp angles. The skin beneath Loki's eyes were agitated and red.
Steve chose not to mention it and just closely watched Loki walk back to his bedroom.
(𝑇𝑖𝑚𝑒𝑠𝑘𝑖𝑝)
Loki attempted to fall back asleep. He was successful, yet he didn't get the sweet dreams he desired to achieve. He was once again pulled into the dangerous and dark corners of his mind. HIs brain felt as though it was pulling itself apart, breaking itself and the host. A dark plague was cast over Loki, and frankly, he was afraid he wouldn't be able to pull himself out.
Loki lay still against the cold bed. A silk blanket was cast over him as heavy breaths sounded throughout the small room. His eyebrows were furrowed as beads of sweat slipped down his face. His lips were drawn into a jagged line.
He tossed and turned in his bed. Slightly groaning uncomfortably with every turn. The god ended up placing both of his hands against his ears. His eyes began to shut even tighter. Loki whimpered vaguely and slurred begs left his lips.
His hands began to tug at his hair. His raven strands of hair were knotted and unkempt.
Loki's eyes suddenly shot open as he jolted upwards. His legs lay out in front of himself while his arms held his upper body weight. His eyes were bloodshot. The skin underneath turned into a harsh shade of red as he violently rubbed the tears out of his eyes.
After a couple of moments, Loki began to calm down slightly. He let out a heavy, almost sobbing sigh before running one of his hands through his tangled hair. Tears continued to fall at a steady pace as his heart pounded against his wheezing chest.
The sound of knocking bounced against the green walls of the small room. The door creaked open as Tony Stark peered inside.
"Lokes, you alright?"
Loki took a deep breath. His chest wheezed with sharp breathing as his heart pounded against his ribcage.
Tony took a couple of steps into the dimly lit room with a sandwich in hand. Getting no response, Tony peered around the room before his eyes landed on the figure in the bed. Loki seemed to be in a dazed state as he sat unblinking. He barely moved. The only giveaway for the still being alive was the way his chest raised and set.
Tony placed the plate onto the nearby desk. The inventor repeated his statement beforehand. "You alright reindeer games?"
Loki seemed to have left his dazed state as he finally looked at the other man.
"Yes," Loki cleared his throat. He readjusted his position on the bed to appear more relaxed and put together.
Loki glanced upwards at the inventor. "What did you come in here for?"
"Uh, I was bringing you a sandwich. Courtesy of Cap." Tony pointed at the sandwich before glancing at the door.
"I'll thank Rogers later." Loki mumbled to himself quietly.
Tony nodded. He paused for a second, taking in the appearance of the god. Taking note of it, he decided he'd return later. Tony realized that he was no longer needed in the bedroom and nodded goodbye before leaving.
Loki shook his head and dismissed the other man's actions. Sighing heavily, the god closed his eyes and fell backward. He let the dark void taint his vision as he succumbed to his afternoon nap.
(𝑇𝑖𝑚𝑒𝑠𝑘𝑖𝑝)
"Maybe take a shower, Loki? It might pull you out of that depressive cycle you seem to be stuck in." Tony lightly chuckles, slightly nudging the other man.
Loki spared a harsh glare in annoyance before scoffing. "I'd rather go back to sleep." The god then lay down and turned away from Tony. Shoving a pillow over his face tightly, he curled inwards on himself.
Tony paused. "You've got to shower sometime."
Getting no response, Tony spoke again, this time amusement seeped into his tone.
"Honestly, you're beginning to stink reindeer games."
Loki brought the pillow off his face before blowing a few strands of hair away from his eyes. His eyes pierced through the other man's eyes, and his mouth uttered a snippy response.
"I do not."
"Listen Lokes, if you don't get into the shower willingly, I'll throw your ass in."
The god scoffed in disbelief. Yet this moment of hesitation was short-lived, as Tony soon swooped the other man into his arms.
"Put me down this instant, Stark!" Loki shouted as he tried to get out of the other man's reach.
"As you say, your 'highness,'" Tony replied teasingly before dropping the other into the tub. He walked away, seemingly unbothered by his actions.
Loki sat on the base of his palms and feet, stunned. His eyes were still slightly wide before they quickly formed into slits. Glaring at no one in particular, the god huffed in annoyance.
Tony returned with a black, silk, long-sleeved shirt and grey baggy jeans with a white string around the waist. Setting the clothes on the counter, he walked out of the bathroom without saying a word.
Loki grumbled to himself before rising and beginning to undress.
Turning on the water, the god had set the temperature to lukewarm. Filling up the tub, he then added soap into the water. As the tub was filled with the liquid, Loki leaned back before sighing contently. Bubbles covered every inch of the water, leaving just Loki's head being able to be seen as it leaned on one of the tub edges.
Everything was great. For a moment.
An hour passed, and Loki made no effort to 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 move. His eves were shut gently. His facial expression was peaceful and content. The greasy raven locks on his head had been pushed back.
The annoying pierce of knocking broke the silence. The sound rang through Loki's ears. His eyes shot open. "What could you possibly want now?!" Loki called out, frustrated that his peace had been disturbed.
"Loki, you've been in there for about an hour now."
Loki could tell who it was on the other side of the door. Why won't To- Stark just leave him be already?
The god sat up and brought his knees to his chest. The water sloshed around in the tub as bubbles moved about.
"Can I come in?" The other voice muttered.
Loki paused in slight disbelief. He looked around the tub, noticing the bubbles covering everything.
The god then nodded slightly before realizing the other person couldn't see the action.
"If you try anything weird, I'll kill you." Loki shouted aggressively.
The other person took that as permission to enter and turned the doorknob. Entering the room, Tony walked over to the tub and grabbed some soap and conditioner before crouching down to the front of the tub.
"Can I wash your hair for you?" Tony asked politely.
Loki nodded hesitantly.
Tony began to put some of the soap into Loki's hair before running his fingers through the locks. He massaged the other's scalp gently and slowly untangled any small knots with his fingers.
Loki closed his eyes and relaxed. The physical affection reminded the god of Frigga. Whenever he or Thor had a nightmare, she would run her fingers through their hair. She'd whisper sweet words of affection.
The memories flashed in Loki's mind. They made the god feel comfortable and safe.
Loki flashed a small smile as his face relaxed once more.
"Alright, all done." Tony hummed. The inventor stood up and went to the sink to wash the remaining soap off his hands.
"I'll wait for you outside." Tony quietly told the other as he averted his eyes to the door, not looking at Loki.
He left the room, closing the door gently.
Loki rinsed off and dried. Putting on the black top and grey pants, he tried fixing his messy hair in the restroom mirror. Beads of water dripped from his scalp down his back and shoulders.
Noticing his shirt was getting wet, the god looked around the bathroom for a small towel. The only towel was the one he had previously used to dry himself. Turning back to the mirror, he attempted to put his hair into its usual look. Wet strands of hair continued to fall over his face, no matter how much he pushed it back.
Sighing somewhat, Loki just decided to keep it as it is and trucked out the room. Looking around his bedroom, he noticed Tony had stayed like he said he would. The god was slightly taken aback before covering his small feelings of disbelief.
Tony sat on the edge of the bed holding a towel. It is convenient for him to have that, yet there isn't a single small one in the restroom itself. Loki was irked somewhat at that realization.
Tony gestured the other man over to him with his hand out, palm facing upwards. Loki took steady footsteps over to the other man and sat on the edge of the bed as soon as Tony moved farther backward.
Tony began to fluff up and dry Loki's hair with the towel, much to the god's annoyance. All his handwork had been ruined in a matter of seconds.
After about ten minutes of repeated actions, Tony deemed the god's mess of raven hair dry enough. Setting the towel to the side, Tony began to speak.
"So, how do you feel now?" Keeping his voice quiet and even,
Loki paused at the question.
"What do you mean?" Loki uttered before turning his head towards Tony moderately.
"Well, no offense, but you looked like shit earlier." Tony replied, slight humor in his tone. His facial features remained somewhat serious as he tried to lighten the topic.
Loki glared and opened his mouth to argue, yet closed it abruptly. He didn't know how to respond to that. The god turned away from m the inventor.
"You wanna talk about it?" Tony began to rub one of Loki's shoulders.
Loki pulled away from the much-wanted embrace.
"Come on Lokes," Tony tried. "You've got to talk about it sometime."
Loki grumbled yet stayed stubborn and unmoving.
"It will only get worse the more you keep it to yourself. It'll just keep pouring and pouring until it overflows."
Loki lessened his glare as his eyes became blurry. He pretended he wasn't listening to the other man's soft-spoken words.
"If you don't want to tell me, that's okay." Tony paused. "But at least talk to someone." He added, gently nudging the god to get his attention.
After getting no response again, Tony sighed. He then moved to rise from the bed.
Loki didn't look at the man. He felt the weight shift off the bed from where Tony was sitting.
As Tony was about to leave the room, Loki swallowed his pride and quickly rushed his next words.
"WAIT- Wait." Loki turned to face the door.
Tony paused. The door was halfway open, doorknob in his hand.
Loki stumbled over his words as his voice was muddy slurred.
The inventor didn't bother trying to hide his concern as it soon overtook his facial expression. Closing the door, Tony waited patiently for the god to find his words.
Loki inhaled deeply and closed his eyes.
"I get nightmares, and I know it's stupid because I shouldn't get this upset over dreams- its pathetic of me." Loki rushed to speak. His voice was shaking slightly as he opened his eyes and looked down at the floor.
Tony walked away from the door and crouched infront of Loki. He took both of the god's hands into his own and chose his next words carefully.
"Lokes, getting nightmares isn't something to be ashamed of." Tony responded.
Loki scoffed while his face overtook an expression of annoyance, obviously not believing the other's words.
Despite this response, Tony continued. "In fact, I get nightmares all the time."
Loki glanced at Tony, his expression slightly let up.
"You're joking." Loki snapped.
"No, I'm really not."
"You are just saying that to make me feel bette-"
"Everyone gets nightmares, especially in this tower. Everyone had been through some deep shit and that's bound to cause nightmares." Tony cut off with a small lecture.
Loki didn't respond.
The room filled with silence as neither man spoke.
"I'll tell you what," Tony muttered. "Next time you have a nightmare, come get me."
Loki hesitated before nodding.
Tony spared a small smile before standing and walking out the door.
Loki sighed once the other man was gone. He then lay down on his side and tried to get some rest. Hopefully, he won't get nightmares this time.