𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗮 𝗯𝗲 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺
Time had passed since the incident, if I'm totally honest it hasn't gotten any better. Everyday is the same cycle with no excitement to come. I have been searching around town or any other place that she could possibly be in. I have even come to the conclusion that she's not on this island no more.
Although I've had my reckless nights searching for the girl all across town, Pieck doesn't seem that interested into talking to me ever since the incident. Even after I had told her and explained to her she just seems to not believe me.
We tend to give one another a look and go with our ways as if we didn't know one another. I try to believe that maybe she's just busy but when she's off she's with her other friends. Or I would tend to go out and see her with them and act as if I was never there.
My anger and energy has shifted into silence unable to speak to anyone about my experience, and unable to talk to the only person that knows furthers my silence.
I had lost the patience to even have anyone around me that wasn't her. All my favorite things were turning into something I hated.
On the bright side is that after training I was planning to go to the garden and visit Jane. I had promised her that I'll come.
Before doing so I had to get a few duty's done before being able to leave. Mid shift I see Pieck walk by with some boy that had brown hair. As she walked passed me she acted like I wasn't there, to which I did the same.
4:35
I get done with everything and begin my walk down to the garden. This time I decided to enjoy the nice breeze while walking.
I close my eyes as I take a deep breath of the nice cold air. I couldn't help but smile at the feeling I was getting. I haven't felt like this in a while and I wasn't letting anything get in between that.
I get closer to the garden and walk in. Instead of being greeted to a quiet garden i was greeted to a bunch of kids running around.
These kids weren't small to say least they were soldiers. It was Pieck friends.
I slowly walk in as they all start to look at me weirdly. I begin to feel unwelcome due to all of the weird stares.
"Who is this?" The brown haired dude said as he gave me a look.
"I'll take care of it" Pieck said as she walked up to me in a unpleasant way.
Everyone begins to do what they did before I was greeted with Pieck. She reached to me and harshly grabbed me to the side.
"What are you doing here? Are you following me or something?" Pieck said a little annoyed to see my presence.
"What no I had told Jane I was coming, also why did you invite people here?" I told Pieck referring to all the kids that were running around. When we were there barely anyone came but now everyone was here.
"Yelena please you act like this is private property plus they're my friends." Pieck said rolling her eyes at my comment.
"Pieck this isn't just a place don't you remember and there was never this much people here for a reason." I tell Pieck hinting to her friends that were damaging some of the Flowers.
"Drop it Yelena it's time to make new memories with new people and also why would you care for what they do?" Pieck defended them.
"Seriously this is how your going to be? This might not be private property but this is someone's property that they're ruining." I argue back to Pieck.
"Stop bringing them into this. I know why your here and I'm not going to feel pity for you Yelena." Pieck said changing the subject. What is she talking about?
"What are you saying?" I asked Pieck confused to what she meant.
"You want me to feel pity over your actions. You were the reason why she's gone if it wasn't for you she would be here and we both know that. But you fucked up again." Pieck snaps at me i could tell she meant everything she said. I just remained silent letting her finish.
"Yelena I'm going to be so honest. I hated you since the moment I saw you around her. If it wasn't because Y/n wanted us to get along I would have been away from you years ago." Pieck spoke to me only coming out venom from her mouth.
I stood there speechless of what she had told me but I didn't give her the satisfaction to get a reaction. So I just kept the same look I had.
"I hope you rot as a Titian shifter and I hope you drop dead before you could see Y/n one last time." I spat back as I walked away from the garden. I had no business to be here not after what had happened just now. Lead along I wasn't going to get blamed by some stupid kids actions.
I was done with Piecks behavior furthermore i was done with the treatment she gave me these past days.
"ILL RUIN EVERY MEMORY YOU HAVE OF HER EVERYTHING WILL BE IN SHAMBLES" Pieck yelled at me i could tell she wanted a raise from me but I just didn't give in. I was in no place to give her what she wanted.
As I walked back to my house the breeze only grew colder. Although it was getting cold it had made me calmer.
I make it to my house just to notice the front door of my house was wide open. I froze at the sigh of the door wide open. Making sure there wasn't anyone around I looked around making sure there was no sign of a truck or anything of that matter.
I snuck to the side of the house and looked through the mirror.
I saw my father arguing to some solider as they soon came into an agreement. Not so long after I saw my father walk out of the house.
I ducked down trying to hide from my father since I wasn't sure if I was meant to be there. A few footsteps are heard before they go to a stop.
"Yelena?" He said confused to see me crouching. I slowly get up as I look at him confused.
"What happened?" I asked him confused to why there is a solider in our home.
"They kicked us out" He said I wasn't sure what he meant by that so I gave him a weird look.
"We can't live there no more. They kicked us out" My dad clarifies. My eyes widen now getting the news hes telling me. How can it be? What did we do?
"Where will we go?" I asked my father confused. We made sure everything was fine so why are we getting kicked out?
"Go to your friends for the night I'll make up something." My father said. My father's already going through so much I can't just tell him that I have nowhere to go. I just nod and begin to walk away from the house.
Ever since the incident everything has gone down hill. Today I was hoping that it was different but it was in fact not, it was way worse than any other day.
As if the days haven't gotten any harder to get over now I have to deal with not having a home and not having a friend. I was running out of ideas on what to do here.
The day was getting dark so I just walk to the garden hoping that this time I could enjoy any sort of peace. I was now sure that they were gone so I could enjoy the only thing I have for myself.
I walk into the garden that was somehow still open. As I walked in I look at Jane who looks devastated on how the flowers looked. I walk towards Jane and look at the flowers.
The flowers were now half stepped on or look like they were dying due to the poor treatment that they had just got.
"I would have never done this to you." I said as I stared at the beautiful flowers that are now dead on the floor.
"I know kiddo, Piecks no longer invited." Jane said sadly as she touched the dead flowers. The poor lady has been working on this garden for years only to be ruined less than a hour.
"I'll let you be" I said as I walked away from her.
I was in no state to comfort anyone I wasn't even in the right state to feel pity for anyone. So I began to walk away from Jane and up to the hill. I felt bad for the lady but what else can I do? I have nothing.
As I got up I was greeted with the amazing view but this time it was different because of the flowers.
I sat down as I looked at the sun go down and the garden.
Surprisingly I had no emotion to express how I currently felt. Even after what Pieck had told me and in addition of getting kicked out. I was left with no feelings but a heavy craving for the women I most desperately love.
Unsure of where to go now and unsure of where she could be all I do is just sit on top of the mountain that I once sat while ago.
The breeze got colder and the night got lonelier. This had to be the worst way to enjoy such view.
I tried not letting Pieck get to me since all she wanted is to ruin this place for me. This being the only place that I could spend my time without having to deal with anyone out of training.
I still have hope that she is alive, there is no doubt in my mind that she be out there somewhere.
For the past months I've been looking desperately for answers but I haven't gotten much from it. Although I have tired to make Pieck tag along she would usually dismiss me.
I thrive with on no more than a desperate hope. A hope that could lead me nowhere but I need to make sure.
The only thing that I want is far from me and who knows where. I won't give up like this.
Pieck
I laid In my bed reflecting my choices and my actions towards the people i had encountered today.
I have no remorse nor regret on what I had told Yelena earlier today. Nor do I regret taking my friends to the garden.
Although I am no longer able to return to the garden I have many other places I can go without needing to see Yelena.
To think that Yelena was trust worthy was nothing more than a hope. That girl was far from being trusted and far from reliable.
And yet Y/n saw something in her that I just don't see. She put hope in her and treated her like a love one. For fuck sake she convinced me that building a bond with Yelena was a good idea.
Yet all this hope got her to who knows where. I'm not even sure if she's alive all because of Yelena's stupid trip.
Even if it's true that her parents didn't care. It doesn't make it any better that Yelena could be one of the reasons to why she's no longer here.
Besides that I also have to deal with the burden of my friends coming back from Eldia or not. I just have to hope that they would make it back alive before we get our next mission.
The times I've spent in my Titian has slightly damaged the way i could walk. Sometimes even needing to hold onto the wall for support.
It's exhausting having to learn how to walk every time I stop becoming a titan just so I can lose that progress.
Yet I've been more used to the Titian more than my human body. I could go for hours without having to eat and or sleep.
Ever since the incident I've never been more focused with training than I am now. Hoping to possibly find her.
Even if my question is answered in a way I didn't intend I'll be happy that I tried.
I won't die until I get a answer.
©Yelenassubject