Melissa didn't arrive until the sun rose over Beacon Hills. She had been working the night shift at the hospital and couldn't get out of it earlier. It had been frustrating, as it meant Hayden had to lay in suffering for hours, but now that she was finally here, I couldn't lie and say I wasn't relieved. Scott seemed to be more at peace. He didn't watch Liam and I with a blank scowl anymore, only settled for keeping to himself. I hated his silence, but it was better than his anger.
"Is any of this actually going to help her?" Liam asks as we watch Melissa work. He and I stand at Hayden's tableside, while Theo and Scott observe from the waiting room doorway.
"In theory," Melissa replies cryptically as she hangs heavy IV bags from the hooks of their metal stand. They were filled with a clear solution that would inevitably find its way into Hayden's veins through a slight needle.
Melissa peers up from the extension tubing she preps, finding all of us wearing confused expressions.
With a sigh, she explains.
"It's called chelation therapy. It removes heavy metals from the blood."
Liam nods slowly as he thinks to himself.
"Mister Yukimura taught us about that. He said it was used in World War Two on soldiers who had lead poisoning," he says, making me smile subtly. He always had a brightness in his eyes when he spoke of History.
"Well, it also works against mercury. Our only problem is that it can injure the kidneys, and Hayden already only has one to begin with," Melissa continues.
Hayden winces at the mention of her failed organ. Her sweat-covered face contorted with anguish, and I feel useless just standing here to watch, so I put my hand over hers to make her focus on me rather than her own unease.
"If you survive this, I'll give you one of mine," I offer, entirely serious despite my coy grin.
Hayden smiles through her suffering, letting out a breathy chuckle.
"You got a deal," she agrees playfully.
Her moment of bliss ends when Melissa steps forward. Hayden shrinks away from the IV catheter in her hand, her aversion to needles being revealed. None of us could judge her for it, as she hasn't had the best of luck with them in the past twenty-four hours.
"How long do we have to do this for?" she asks the woman above her.
Melissa sends a pitied frown her way, her silence enough of an answer.
"Get comfortable. Got it," Hayden mutters spitefully.
She closes her eyes and grips my hands as Melissa stands on the other side of the table. She uses a clean cotton pad to wipe the surface of Hayden's hand to prep the area for insertion. When the metal pricks her skin, Hayden sucks in air through her teeth and clenches at my fingers. She doesn't struggle though, which helps make it pass quicker.
Melissa rubs her hand comfortingly when she's done.
"Good job," she praises before stepping away, moving to shift the slide clamp on the IV tube. The contents of the bag travel through it, making their way into Hayden. My breath becomes shallow as I wait for her to have any reactions, but she doesn't. She only gives me a slight nod to assure me she's okay.
"You all need to rest, too." Melissa studies the boys and I, her dark eyes showing concern. "I'm exhausted just looking at you."
My gaze ventures over my shoulder to survey Scott.
There are dark bags under his eyes that not even his enhanced healing can hide. His posture is caved in, too, and I hate how deflated he appears. When he catches me staring, he swiftly returns to the waiting room, not a single word spared. Theo notices and offers a sympathetic wince my way.
"We'll be in here, if you guys need us," he dismisses himself politely, taking after Scott.
I don't linger in the Alpha's attitude. I adjust the blanket Hayden was wrapped in, curling the ends of the wool fabric under her. She may have had an intense fever, but her endless trembling was a sign that she was convinced she was freezing.
She thanks me softly as her eyelids start to droop, all of the events from the past day drawing her into unconsciousness.
"You should sleep," Liam tells me. "I'll take the first watch."
I shake my head, resistant to being under for even a few hours. My mind had a tendency to be overactive in times like this and I knew there would be a string of nightmares waiting for me, or some vivid dream I could barely understand. I also didn't want to leave us vulnerable because I needed a nap. The faceless hunter and frozen woods could wait, as could my rest.
"I want to stay up for a while, make sure the IVs are working," I claim, brushing him off. Liam still seems resistant, though.
"You sleep," I insist further. "I'll wake you up in a few hours and we can switch."
It's a lie, as I had no plans to do such a thing, but it's enough for him to give in.
"Okay," Liam concedes lightly.
He steps away from me, going over to the chairs we had brought in from the waiting room last night. They were against the far wall, but he carries one over to me so I can be at Hayden's side. He repositions his chair, too, aiming it in my direction. Sleep finds him soon enough after he sits, and his endearing snores mix with Hayden's labored ones.
I take the opportunity to admire him as he slips away. His slumber softens the lines of stress that had been digging into his features for days, giving an illusion of peace that I wish would remain in his waking hours.
As desperately as I want to save Hayden, I resented that I was dragging him into this. He was going against his Alpha and being hunted by insane parascientists to protect her, all because I asked him to. That's not to say he wouldn't help her outside of this, I was sure he would in his own way, but his devotion was stronger because I was the one he was really trying to protect. He understood that I couldn't lose her like I had lost so many before. Though, my fear now was that in the midst of all of this chaos, I would lose him.
I only stop studying his path of breathing when I realize Melissa's watching me.
I default to staring down at my lap instead. I avoid her eyes, scared of what I would find within them. If she gave me even a fraction of the reaction her son had to my secrets, I would crack.
Melissa doesn't speak, only approaches me at a non-threatening pace, and brings her own chair with her. Using my peripheral vision, I observe her as she places it directly next to mine. She happily takes her seat at my side, sighing contently.
As if she's some horrid beast, I slowly lift my head to peek over at her. Melissa snorts in response to my childish actions, much to my relief. Her amusement is a sign she's not disappointed in me. Evidence of that only continues to stack up when she wraps her arm around my back. She pulls me toward her and starts to rub soothing circles into my arm where her hand rests.
I stiffen at first, but eventually find myself dropping my head onto her shoulder.
Melissa's actions are that of a nurturing mother, which makes me think of my own, and how much I wished she could be here.
Tears prick my eyes at the thought, but I don't bother to wipe them away. Melissa doesn't mention my discreet sniffling or the teardrops that darken spots of her purple sweater. She simply presses a light kiss into my hair, telling me that though my mother was gone, she was still here.
---
It wasn't long after she came to sit with me did Melissa fall asleep.
That left me as the only one left in the examination who hadn't given in to their exhaustion. The painkillers Melissa brought aided with that, as my headache was efficiently snuffed out. Years of hunting stakeouts also trained me not to rely on sleep when in the presence of danger, which we basically were at all times with the Dread Doctors somewhere beyond our knowledge.
Thoughts of them make me tense, especially when I hear a bell chime.
It's the one that's above the front door that signals when people come and go. There was no reason for it to be in use right now, so I rose to investigate the sound's origin. Melissa stirs when I move as she had been leaning against me in her slumber, but she falls back under when I don't disturb her further.
I migrate to the waiting room and stop behind the front desk when I find no one but Scott. He looks up, hearing the scuff of my boots against the tiled floor. He doesn't say anything, though. He only waits for me to explain why I've broken our unspoken rule that neither of us would interact.
"Where's he going?" I ask, referring to Theo's absence.
Selfishly, I had relied on him being here. He had been adamant about his support and I had assumed that meant he would stay with us through the night. I wanted to text him and ask what was more important, but I had hope he would return later.
"He's going to talk to Malia and Lydia," Scott mumbles.
I have the urge to question Stiles' whereabouts and why he didn't mention him, but after Scott's asthmatic reaction to his name last night, I decided against it. I simply nod in thanks for his explanation. Nothing comes after that, and then it's just Scott and I staring at one another.
This is the first time we've been alone for days, and it's clear we're both thinking about how nothing feels the same as it used to. That undeniable truth brings me more pain than I thought possible.
Feeling a mixture of bold and helpless, I go to him.
Scott doesn't refuse to let me take the seat at his side but doesn't make any moves to welcome me either. He resumes peering down at his hands, picking at the skin of his thumbs to keep busy.
"Do you hate me?" I can't help but ask.
The question forces his eyes to meet mine, his gaze filled with disbelief.
"Never," he utters, bringing a fraction of a smile to my lips. It fades as he continues.
"I just don't get why you kept lying," he adds quietly.
"It's not like you gave me much of a choice, Scott," I argue quietly. "You basically made me pick between you and Liam, and I didn't want to have to do that."
This moment obviously hadn't been what I wished it was, but there was also a great weight that had been lifted from my chest from that confession. I had been convincing myself for months that Scott's intentions were good and his grief was excusable, but neither was. The promise he asked me to make wasn't fair and I was done pretending otherwise.
"But you still chose," he mutters.
"Yeah, because I've been controlled almost my entire life. It gets tiring after a while," I reply with wry sarcasm.
Scott flashes an offended twitch my way.
"I'm not like Kate or Gerard," he says with disgust.
"And I didn't say you were," I instantly clarify, his misinterpretation of my words opening up a whole separate world of frustrations. I refrain from allowing that to goad me into a full-blown argument, as Scott's main problem here was that he couldn't see my side. If I wanted him to, I needed him to understand.
"You said that tempting fate is inciting death as if it's something to fear, but I've seen what's waiting for me. I'm not afraid of it," I start, a soft smile lifting my lips once more.
I can picture the woods I had been in so clearly, as well as the people that existed within their trees. It was a world without pain; suffering. All that I loved and lost waited for me there, and would do so forever. Nothing there was something I had to deem as horrific.
"But what does terrify me is dying without knowing what life feels like," I admit to Scott.
The amount of regret I endured as death claimed me wasn't something I would willingly put myself through again. If it weren't for my friends saving my life that night, I wouldn't be here. I would have died without living, leaving nothing behind but sorrow.
But since then, I haven't taken my second chance for granted. I had changed. It may not have been in the exact ways I wanted to, but it was worth something; worth confronting death and leaving behind a chance at bliss to gain something more.
The boy beside me had been one of my reasons to fight for that. None of our problems now would change that loyalty I had to him and his cause, not if I could help it.
I reach for Scott's hand, cradling it with mine. He doesn't pull away, only seems surprised that I've extended a comforting touch. It was still a rare act for me, especially now with the divide between us.
"I need you to find a way to forgive me, Scott, because I care about Liam, more than I've ever cared about anyone, and I'm not letting him go," I plead gently.
This wasn't up to me, it was up to him. He needed to decide whether he could move past all of this, or let it be our undoing.
Scott makes his decision as he pulls his hand out of mine.
"I can't," he whispers, making me grow numb.
"Not right now, at least," he adds afterward, as if that makes a difference.
"Scott-"
He silences me with one disappointing shake of his head.
"Jac, I was just trying to protect you, and you broke your promise and lied to me for months. I can't pretend that didn't happen," he says, sounding almost like he's lecturing me.
He doesn't mean for it to happen, but his words set me off. Him trying to use this as a teaching moment for me, rather than admitting he could possibly be in the wrong made my wishes for control and neutrality all slip away at once.
I separate myself from him as I stand, glaring down at his seated form.
"I don't need you to protect me," I all but spat.
Scott's features solidify into one of disdain while warm tears pool in the corner of my eyes. I don't push them away this time. I let them fall so Scott can see that he was the cause. I want him to feel a fraction of the loss he's just pushed onto me.
"I'm not her, Scott," I breathe out harshly. "I think it's time you accept that."
His stone expression crumbles in an instant. To him, I've gone too far, but to me, I've made the same play he did when he asked me not to care about Liam. I used Allison against him; our common weakness.
He rises from his own seat, coming to his full towering height directly in front of me. His heavy breaths should caution me to back down. Wolves could feel the supermoon even during the day, and he may have been a True Alpha, but he wasn't invulnerable to it. That may have even been a reason why he was in denial, as outer forces toyed with his emotions, but I didn't care.
I openly play with fire, and relish in his battle with rage and control, as it's one I've fallen victim to time and time again. One way or another, he would understand my plight.
"Jac," Liam says firmly, snapping Scott and I out of our leering trance.
He observes us from the doorway to the back room. Despite speaking solely to me, his eyes are glued to Scott. He works to track every deep breath he takes with close attention, and his jaw remains stiff as sculpted iron. The only warmth in his blue eyes is a product forged by a fiery glare. It all tells me he's heard everything Scott's just said, and he cared for none of it.
His hand extends itself toward me, waiting.
"Hayden's awake. She's asking for you," he explains shortly.
I go to him, no longer caring about Scott.
Liam's hand hovers over my waist as he guides me into the other room, sending a final narrow-eyed look at his Alpha before we enter.
Liam hadn't been the only one to wake up in the time Scott and I had spoken. Melissa and Hayden had, too. The former was at Hayden's side, dabbing a damp rag on her sweaty forehead to cleanse it of heavy moisture. Hayden lets out soft whines as the sleep that kept her docile refuses to stay.
The mercury was taking its toll on her and the IVs she was connected to had done nothing to change that.
"What do you need?" I ask her lightly, taking my place at her side.
Hayden swallows thickly, forcing herself to speak. "Val. Call Val."
"Val?" Melissa echoes, confused.
"It's her sister," Liam responds. "She's a deputy."
"Deputy Clark," I clarify.
Hayden and her sister shared blood, but not last names. We had all actually seen Valerie at the station before, but never knew who she was until we met Hayden and discovered their relationship.
Footsteps sound from behind Liam and I, but I don't care to greet their creator.
"I think I might know where she is," Scott says, having heard us from the adjacent room.
He goes to the foot of the table, addressing all of us despite my glorified silent treatment. it was petty of me, but the only other solution I could think of was to get into a screaming match with him, and that wouldn't solve anything.
"Theo just texted me about the high school. He said there's cops everywhere, might be another chimera," Scott adds.
Hayden lifts her hand, her fingers opening shakily with an unspoken plea. I accept it and let her grip my hand as tightly as she can with her fading health. I don't want to see her like this, but if she needed me at her side, I was willing to bury that down.
"My sister... I don't want to die without my sister," she gasps through shattered breaths.
"I'll get her," Scott says grimly.
"And what exactly are you going to tell her?" Liam questions him with spite.
Valerie wasn't the most open person. She was reserved, and for good reason as a deputy. She didn't know Scott and she didn't know about the supernatural. Him going to bring her here was something easier said than done.
"If I have to, I'll tell her everything," Scott replies, making his way to the clinic's exit.
I glare at his retreating form, unable to help it.
He was willing to expose Valerie to all of the dangers that came with the knowledge of the supernatural world, but he wouldn't even consider biting Hayden. I had tried to understand his point of view over all of this, but the more I thought about it, the more enraged I became.
"Jac," Hayden whispers, breaking through my distracted state.
I smile down at her, forcing it for her sake. She didn't need to be dragged into the middle of Scott and I's back and forth, especially if it affected her concentration on healing.
"Does dying hurt?" she asks, making my false grin crack instantly.
I'm thrown by her question until I glance at Liam. His remorseful stare is enough of an explanation as to why Hayden somehow knew of my untimely run-in with the bone spike of a Berserker. It must've been a topic of conversation the day they spoke of my past, Liam taking the burden of explaining almost everything to her.
I suppress the burning sob that pesters my throat over the reminder of that moment. It's not there because I'm upset that he told her, not in the slightest, it's because I want more than anything for Hayden not to feel what I did as the end drew near.
"No. The pain is what keeps us alive," I repeat to her what I had once said to myself in the face of death. It brings forward a broken smile of Hayden's own.
"I guess it's a good thing this hurts like a bitch then, huh?" she jokes.
The two of us share a twisted fit of laughter that Liam and Melissa freeze at, as this is the last place humor should exist. I'm not bothered by it, though. I relish in the fact that even now, Hayden has the same warped sense of humor that made me enjoy her company in the first place. It doesn't stop the subtle tears from spilling from either of our eyes, but it makes this all feel a little less like torment.
Hayden's distorted chuckles stop as another wave of agony hits her. She grips my hand weakly as she tries to fight her way through it, but it's clear that task is growing more difficult.
I flinch, tempted to look away. I had seen piles of dead bodies before and mutilated corpses, but it all paled in comparison to someone I cared about being in pain. I wanted nothing more than to rid her of it, but I couldn't.
Liam comes to my side, his touch settling on my back to get my attention. His expression holds a strong sense of determination as he gestures to mine and Hayden's joined hands.
"Let me," he says, and it only takes a second for me to comprehend his intentions.
"You don't have to," I assure him quietly.
"I can do it," he replies without any trace of doubt.
Hesitantly, I place Hayden's hand down on the surface of her bundle of blankets. She watches Liam and I, unsure of what was happening. Her curiosity only grows when Liam reaches for her arm, and she dodges him before he can make contact.
"Hayden, give me your arm," he requests.
"God, no," she cringes through her whimper.
"Hayden," I scold her.
She sighs and drops her limb to its previous position, letting Liam wraps both of his hands around her forearm. Melissa and I both pay witness as he closes his eyes and takes long, concentrated breaths. I had expected him to remain like that, in a semi-meditative state, but he doesn't. He opens his eyes to reveal his yellow irises that find me, and then he never turns away.
A chill runs down my spine because of it, as it feels as though he can't see anything but me, and not only because I was all he was looking for.
Hayden's gasp pulls me from the borderline hypnotic state I was trapped in within his gaze.
Black lines coat Liam's exposed skin. They draw attention to the veins that line his muscular arms as he drains Hayden of her pain. She huffs out in relief, her rigid limbs becoming like water. This may not have been enough to cure her, but it helped to make it all the more bearable.
When Liam finally lets go, Hayden beams.
"Thanks, Dumpbar," she breathes out.
Liam shakes his head at the nickname, but for once he does it fondly. It's as if he's pleased to see that Hayden can make the effort to harass him.
"No problem," he tells her amusedly.
His eyes venture to mine again, and I instantly lean forward to press a grateful peck to his lips for what he's just sacrificed. His cheeks and neck burn bright with embarrassment, and he dips his head to hide his reaction. I'm not sure why until it dawns on me that this is the first time Liam and I had shown public affection, a smirking Melissa being our audience.
"That's gonna take some getting used to," she teases.
I bite my lip to stifle my laughter as Liam's blush intensifies over her words. I take his hand into mine to help ease his troubles and he relaxes with my touch. We stay like that for a while, standing guard over Hayden together, even as the sun starts to set and the supermoon works its way into the sky, its threatening glow lighting the path for what was to come.
~
||| A/N |||
TEEN WOLF MOVIE DISCUSSION
--SPOILERS AHEAD--
sorry in advance for the long note! skip if you'd like!
I really enjoyed the movie for what it was. I laughed, I teared up, and I cringed. It felt just like old times lol. However, there was some stuff about the movie that I didn't like or felt was ooc.
If yall want a book for it with Jac, being honest, there are some things I'm going to have to add/change. Our girl would never let the thing that killed Allison sit on a shelf in a ramen shop lol.
Also, would y'all want the book to be mature-rated like the movie or no?
I'm not saying Jac will play patty-cake with Liam's cheeks like Malia did with Parrish's (yikes), but there could be more descriptions of intimacy and consistent strong language...?
Last, but not least, RIP to the realest to ever do it.
<3