A/N: So, for those of you who didn't read 'Enough for her' and 'happier', please do! This oneshot is a continuation and you'll want to have read them to fully understand what's happening in this one. Thank you to marina19x for the idea and for all of you for supporting me in my writing!
"Mommy?" Felice asked, walking around the apartment trying to find her Mommy. "Mike? Chase?"
It took Felice a few weeks to adjust to living with Maya, her brothers, and Florence, but she loved every moment of it. It was different than living with her Mama and with Gabriela, who was only living with them because they worked together a lot at the hospital.
She and her brothers only got closer. Mike was excited to have a little sister to care for and Chase loved having someone who loved playing with cars and trains just as much as him. Maya's heart warmed when she watched them all playing together and she wished that it would always be like this.
A few months after Felice joined their little family, Maya wanted to take the next step with Florence. She took the kids out for dinner and ice cream while Florence worked the night shift, and asked them if they would be okay with Maya marrying Florence. Mike and Chase immediately agreed with the idea, having been around Florence for almost two years already. Felice was a little more hesitant but ultimately decided that she enjoyed the idea of Florence joining their family.
So, Maya took her three children to the jewelry store to pick out a ring. They spent an hour in the store until Felice finally found a ring that she thought Florence, and Maya, would like. Maya loved the ring; it was simple, just like she wanted.
"Cosa c'è che non va, Felice (What's wrong, Felice)?" Maya asked as she walked into the living room, finding the five-year-old standing there, holding her bear. "Non vado da nessuna parte (I'm not going anywhere)."
Felice nodded, running to hug Maya, who graciously accepted and placed a kiss on her daughter's forehead. She knew that Felice was dealing with some separation anxiety since Carina had left her on Maya's doorstep, saying that it was Felice's idea. She later told Maya that it was not her idea, but solely her Mama's.
Maya was puzzled, not knowing the full reason why she now had custody over her daughter, but she was not going to complain about it. She loved having her daughter with her, being able to grow up with her older brothers, and forming a special bond with Maya.
They had gotten a lot closer over the past year, and Felice trusted Maya more than anyone else. While having Felice did warm Maya's heart, all she could think about was Carina. Why would she willingly give up her daughter? She loved kids and wanted them way more than Maya did in the beginning. What could have prompted her to do something like that?
"Honey, I'm home!"
Mike and Chase instantly ran to Florence, who smiled and hugged them tightly. Maya came with Felice on her hip a few minutes later and kissed Florence.
"How was your day?"
Maya smiled, knowing exactly what she and the kids did while Florence was at work. "It was good. We went shopping and ate some ice cream. Dinner's in the oven and the boys were just finishing their homework that's due tomorrow."
"Sounds perfect," Florence said. "How's the little bambina?"
"Sto bene, Flo. Solo un po' triste oggi (I'm okay, Flo. Just a little sad today)," Felice said, breaking Maya's heart in two. She knew how much Felice was suffering during this time, but she just did not know how much.
Florence sighed, smiling softly at Felice before picking her up and holding her close to her. Maya smiled as she watched her girlfriend and daughter interact with each other. She was happy that they'd formed such a close bond, especially since Felice needed two steady moms in her life and she still couldn't understand why Carina had abandoned their daughter like that.
xxxx
"Where are we going now?" Florence asked. "And why aren't the kids coming?"
Maya chuckled. "Because this is a date for just us. That's why Andy was so happy to babysit them."
"Are you sure she can handle six kids?"
"She's done it before," Maya shrugged as she kept holding Florence's hand on their walk through the park. They had just finished a romantic dinner at their favourite restaurant and Maya wanted to walk through the park. There, Vic and Travis would be, with everything all planned.
"Babe... Why do I see Vic and Trav here?"
Vic and Travis smirked, knowing what Maya's plans were.
Maya stopped walking, gently stroking Florence's face. "Because, darling, I have a surprise for you," she said. She then pulled out the small box from her pocket, lowering herself to one knee.
"Maya," Florence gasped.
"Flo, I know things haven't been easy these past two and a half years for us but we have been able to build the best relationship purely with our love. You have accepted all of my children as your own and are the best with them. I love you, Florence, and I want to seal our love for a lifetime. So please, will you marry me?"
Florence, whose eyes were full of tears, smiled and nodded. She couldn't believe she had gotten this far from being just a rookie and thinking she had no chance at love, especially not from her boss. Pulling away from Maya, her eyes brimming with tears, Florence was so overwhelmed she had forgotten that they had an audience. Turning to Vic and Travis, she playfully slapped them on the arm. "You knew!"
Vic chuckled, "Of course we did!"
"Bishop hasn't done this in a few years so she asked us for help," Travis exclaimed happily, earning a glare from Maya. She didn't want to ask her friends for help with her proposal, but since it had been almost ten years since her last, she figured the help would be good to have. She had thought of Carina a lot while planning the proposal for Florence, even being transported back to when she proposed to Carina all those years ago.
"Bambina, what's going on?" Carina questioned as she followed Maya to the roof of the Station 19 firehouse. They had just gone on a date, but Maya wasn't done quite yet. "Why are we on the roof?"
Maya smiled, staring at the city in front of her. "Carina, you're my life. I know I was hesitant about kids but with you... I'm not hesitant about anything. I want a life with you, I want you. I know you were concerned about what our next steps are, but I know exactly what those are."
"I don't want to pressure you into anything you don't want."
"You're not, my love. I want this, I promise."
Carina smiled, holding Maya's face in her hands and kissing her. She was over the moon that Maya had changed her mind about kids. It made her want to rethink her thoughts about marriage, something Maya had been thinking about for a few months. She had always been opposed to marriage, having seen the strained relationship her parents had before her mom's untimely death. But she didn't want to be like her parents.
"Actually, I have a question for you," Maya said softly, playing with her hands, something she did when she was nervous.
"What is it?"
Maya looked down, grabbing Carina's hands in hers. "I love you, Carina, and I have been thinking about this a lot. I don't want to lose you because you complete my life. You and I, we're forever. There's no limit for us."
Carina nodded, watching as Maya pulled something out from her pocket and she gasped. It was a small, velvet box and anyone could guess what was inside.
Kneeling on one knee, Maya opened the box with a nervous smile. "Carina, will you marry me?"
"Si, yes of course bambina!"
"Mommy!! Did Florence say yes?" Chase shouted as he came running to the door to greet them. Michael followed him while Felice was with Andy in the living room. "Did she say yes?!"
Maya chuckled, picking up her eager six-year-old son. "Si, bambino, Florence said yes. Are you happy about that?"
Chase nodded, allowing Maya to put him down so he could hug Florence. They had formed a strong bond and Maya was grateful that her kids had accepted Florence into their lives. She turned to Michael, who seemed to be processing the news. While he had given his mom the blessing to propose, it still felt weird to him. He and Florence also had a good relationship, but nothing could beat the one he had with his mama. The mama that he so dearly took after, both in mannerisms and looks.
"Mike?" Florence asked. She knew it would be tougher on him.
"I'm happy for you guys. I even helped with the ring," he said, shocking Florence. She hugged him and Maya smiled. Her family was slowly coming together. After all the twists and turns she felt like she had finally done it.
"Congrats you guys," Andy said, walking into the hallway with Felice holding her hand and her son, Emilio, on her hip. "Felice, are you happy for Mommy and Florence?"
Felice nodded, still holding a tight grip on her bear. Maya smiled sadly at her daughter, scooping her up in her arms and holding her tight. While she was happy for her mom and her girlfriend, Felice still wished that she could have both her mom and her Mama together with their little family. She wasn't too fond of Gabriela, despite having known her for her entire life. Gabriela was there when Felice was born and she had helped raise Felice until they moved to Seattle.
"She's still adjusting," Maya said to Andy, who noticed how out of place Felice felt. She had noticed it earlier when she was watching the kids. "Having Carina leave her here was pretty rough."
"So you still don't know why Carina did that?"
Maya shook her head. "I know we live pretty close now, but I haven't even thought about asking her. I think it would bring up too much for Felice and she's been through enough lately."
xxxx
Florence and Maya were excited to start preparing for their wedding, having decided against a long engagement period because of their jobs and the kids. They were inviting all their friends and co-workers, sending out invitations and cards. Vic and Travis were helping them plan the event, writing down every detail that the two women wished for.
Since Maya had already gone through the big white wedding, she wanted something smaller this time around. Everything was different this time, all right down to the outfits. But a part of her still wished that she wasn't going through with another wedding.
"Maya? What's wrong?" Andy asked as the two walked through the park, watching their children play with each other. James had decided to stay at home, which made sense since he was quite older than the others.
"I don't know Andy. Am I making a mistake? Marrying Florence?"
Andy's eyes bulged. She didn't think that Maya would be having second thoughts. She was so excited to see her best friend dating again and loved the little family that she and Florence had built together.
"Why would you think that, Mai?"
"I just... Should I have fought harder for Carina? When she left, I mean. I know I was hormonal and confused. I had a toddler and a newborn that needed me to be strong for them. I couldn't let myself fall apart, no matter how much I wanted to."
Andy nodded. She remembered how much Carina's leaving had hurt Maya in a way she would never wish upon anyone else. "I think you're just having some pre-wedding jitters, Mai. It's normal to be nervous before a wedding. I mean, I was."
"But Robert never left you. You have three beautiful children together and are still together after thirteen years. Andy, the pain I felt all those years ago is still there. I don't know why or how. I wish it wasn't, but the wound is still fresh. That's why I'm asking... Do you think I made a mistake with Florence?"
"Mai, only you can determine if this is the right thing for you and your kids. That has to be your decision. If you think that you're moving too fast or that you still love Carina, you have to take a step back and think it through for yourself. All I know is that Florence loves you and the kids. I'm sure she'll understand if you need a breather."
Maya nodded, watching her three kids running after each other. She saw so much of Carina in Michael that it was almost like looking at the younger version of her ex-wife. Chase was a lot like her, which made sense since he really looked up to Maya. And Felice... she was a mixture of the two of them. Maya could see that very clearly. Felice had Carina's temper, Maya's stubbornness, and the same beauty mark as Carina. What hurt Maya the most when she looked at her daughter were her green eyes. Much like Carina's, her eyes transported Maya to another dimension and she got lost in them quite often.
She knew that Andrew's death had shaken her and Carina's little bubble quite unexpectedly. They were over the moon to have brought Chase home, but then the bombshell came and they raced to Andrew's side. From there, Maya knew that Carina wouldn't be the same again. She just didn't think Carina would abandon them. But despite all that they had been through, Maya's heart still fluttered at the thought of Carina. She could still feel her insides exploding when she thought of all the good moments they had together. So she knew what she had to do, even if it hurt.
xxxx
"Carina, you haven't touched your food," Gabriela pointed out as the two women sat near the food truck in the park. Today was their day off from the hospital, so they decided to relax and eat lunch from the truck that was selling Greek food. "You have to eat, bella."
"She looks so happy," Carina muttered, biting into her gyros. Ever since she had moved back to the US, she had found ways to watch Maya and her kids from afar. Guilt had started eating her alive ever since she left Felice with Maya and she wished that she could undo all her actions of the past five years. She missed her family. "They all look so happy."
Gabriela sighed. She tried talking Carina out of giving Felice up, knowing that it would slowly break her best friend. Carina was meant to be a mother, so knowing that her children were living with their other mother and a stranger, made her insides boil. But it was Carina's choice. She was just there to support and work at the hospital. Gabriela watched as Carina's eyes lingered on the kids. She saw how Mike was running with a girl just a little shorter than him; that was probably Abby. Carina had explained how Maya's best friend had three kids as well and that they were practically like cousins; she and Maya had decided that Andy was their godmother.
"Look," Gabriela pointed out. "Mike is bossing everyone around, just like someone I know."
Carina chuckled. She knew that Mike had taken after her the most in mannerisms and behaviour, but watching it unfold before her was a different story. She only knew the younger version of Mike. The version of him that was once three years old, before she left. She didn't get to see him grow up, let alone see Chase grow up. That one pained her the most. She had left when Chase was one.
"Do you think Felice likes it with Maya?"
"Probably. It's Maya. And she's got that young girlfriend helping her."
Carina sighed. That was another thing that stung. Maya had a girlfriend the last time she saw her. She knew that Maya wasn't going to stay single and wait around for her, but a part of her wished that Maya couldn't love anyone but her. It was a selfish thought, but sometimes it was all she could imagine. "Lascia stare, Gabri." (Just leave it, Gabri)
"Mi sto solo prendendo cura di te, Carina. Sei stato così nella tua testa ultimamente e onestamente piuttosto ossessionato da Maya e dalla sua ragazza." (I'm just looking out for you, Carina. You've been so in your head lately and honestly quite obsessed with Maya and her girlfriend.)
"I'm not obsessed," Carina countered, a little louder than she wanted to. Turning to face Gabriela, she looked down at her hands. "I'm just looking out for my kids."
Gabriela shook her head. She'd let Carina believe what she wanted, but she knew the truth about everything. "Carina, they aren't your kids anymore. You legally gave them to Maya. Except for Felice. But you chose to give them up."
xxxx
Maya had just finished a run on the treadmill at work. Florence had the day off today so she was spending it with the kids for more "bonding" time before their wedding. Ever since her talk with Andy at the park, Maya had found herself thinking about Carina more and more. She wasn't sure what it meant, but she'd have to discuss this with Florence before the big day arrived and she couldn't do anything about it then.
"Hey cap," Travis said as she walked into the beanery to refill her water bottle. "What's up? You have your serious face on."
"I do?" Maya chuckled. "You'll have to show me what that looks like, Montgomery."
Travis laughed. Despite all that Maya had been through, he was just glad she was able to joke around again. After Carina had left, he watched as Maya lost herself. She wasn't the same fiery captain but had instead become more desolate and numb.
"How did you know that you wanted to get back together with Emmett?" Maya asked, startling Travis. He hadn't thought about that day in years when he and Emmett had gotten back together the night Maya and Carina got married. They broke up since Emmett was worried about his dad's reaction, but knew how much they loved each other and decided it was worth the risk.
"Well, it wasn't easy. Hiding our relationship was not something I wanted, but I respected Emmett's wishes," Travis started but nodded and cleared his throat when he saw Maya's face. "Right, you mean when I realised I loved him more than anything? He's the one I wanted to be with through all the late shifts, tough conversations, and all the little moments."
"So, because it was unconditional love?"
Travis nodded.
Maya hummed in response, turning on her heel and walking to the showers. During her shower, she thought of everything that had happened five years ago. She remembered sitting in the hospital bed watching as Carina fawned over Chase and how Mike was cuddled up to her. Their little family was perfect.
"I think I still want to be with Carina," she mumbled with a sigh.
xxxx
The wedding day was approaching quickly, in a week to be exact, and Maya was starting to freak out. She hadn't talked to Florence about her feelings yet, even though she knew she had to. But ever since the divorce, she has been more guarded about her feelings. It was a lot like how she was before she met Carina. Andy had tried encouraging Maya to tell Florence two months ago when she had her revelation, but that didn't work. Maya was in denial about her feelings and had decided not to bring up her worries with Florence. She could hear her voice in her head saying what a bad decision it was, but she still ignored it.
"Mommy, do you love Florence?" Mike asked one night as he and Maya were finishing a movie. Chase and Felice had already fallen asleep and Florence was working the night shift.
Maya was taken aback by the question. Mike was smart for his age, sometimes a little too smart in her opinion, but she appreciated that she could have more mature conversations with him already. "Why do you ask that?"
"Well, you've been looking at old photos of Mama more recently. I know she hurt you a lot, but do you still love her?"
"Mike, I will always love your Mama. A part of me always will," Maya said softly, pulling him into her lap and staring into his eyes. "Things are just a little complicated."
He nodded, though it looked like he wanted to say more, but figured his mom wouldn't budge. While he loved Florence, his Mama would always be his number one. Their bond had been inevitable since he was born. "Do you think if you hadn't met Florence that you and Mama would still be together?"
"Maybe, maybe we would have."
xxxx
"Have you figured out what you're going to do?" Andy asked impatiently as she brushed Maya's shoulder length hair. Her best friend was getting married today, albeit to the wrong woman in her opinion. But she wanted Maya to figure it out for herself. "You're getting married today, Mai. I just want you to be happy."
Maya nodded, looking down at the vows she had written. She was trying to make edits to ensure that they were true and conveyed all her feelings. But a part of her also wanted to recall the vows that she had written for her wedding day to Carina. "Mike asked me if I love Florence."
"What did you tell him?"
"I kind of averted that part of the conversation," Maya grimaced.
Andy sighed. It would take a lot more than Maya's kids questioning her love for Florence to really sit and think about who she's marrying. Turning her head, she saw the door to Maya's suite open and Andy dropped the brush in shock.
"Carina?"
"Hi, Maya. Hi, Andy. Can I speak with Maya for a few minutes, per favore?" Carina asked, nerves rattling her entire body. Andy nodded, picking up the brush and placing it on the table, shooting Maya a supportive glance. She would just stand outside to prevent others from coming in.
Maya turned around, facing Carina and it felt as if her heart stopped beating. Carina was still as beautiful as she could remember; it's like nothing had changed. "What did you want to talk about?"
"I love you," Carina blurted. Maya's eyes widened. "I love you. I've loved you since I saw you running into the ER with a nose in a bag. I've loved you since we met at Joe's. I've loved you since you brought me coffee at work. I've loved you since Michael was born. I've loved you since you decided to carry Chase. I've loved you since he was born. I love you."
Maya just stared at Carina in shock, not knowing what brought this confession about.
"I know you're getting married, but I thought you should know. I've always loved you, Maya. I will always love you. It was a mistake to leave Felice with you and not fight. I regret it every day. But you, Maya... you are my soulmate. And I love you. But I understand if you don't love me anymore."
"Oh, shut up," Maya said, standing up and kissing Carina. She could feel fireworks in her stomach and everything just felt like home. After they pulled away, Carina held Maya's face, smiling in shock. She didn't expect Maya to kiss her after her confession, but she did. "I love you, Carina. I've always loved you. Only you."
xxxx
"I can't believe you and Carina got married, again," Andy exhaled that evening. She and the rest of the group were still at the wedding venue. After Carina's confession, Maya had talked to Florence about her decision. Florence wasn't surprised; in fact, it was her idea to have Carina come and for them to get married. She, Andy, and Gabriela were just the matchmakers. "The kids are so happy to have their Mama."
Maya smiled, watching as Carina was surrounded by their kids. Felice had not let go of Carina and refused to be put down, which made her brothers fight harder for their Mama's attention. It would be a long road back to normal for their little family, but Maya knew that everything would work out. "We just proved that our love has no limits."