Chapter 34: Chance
"Hey." Jungkook greets Jimin with a light smile.
"Hey." Jimin greets back.
They didn't ride the same car to Jungkook's apartment since Jimin also drove his own car to Jeon's house. In The End they came in different cars even Jungkook insists on letting someone take Jimin's car later because of Jimin's ankle condition, but the smaller one also insists that it's fine.
"Do you need a hand with that?" Jungkook points at a medium cross body bag that Jimin is holding.
"Oh no. It's fine." Jimin utters as he puts on his bag. "Let's get in?"
"Yeah, let's go." Jungkook leads them both to the elevator, glancing at Jimin who's showing no sign of nervousness or excitement.
"Do you mind if I use your guest bathroom when we reach? I need to freshen up." Jimin asks as they enter the elevator.
"Yes, of course." Jungkook glances at the bag. "What's in your bag?"
"Just the essentials. Since we're having sex. I want to clean up first."
Jungkook raises his eyebrows. Jimin was never like this before. They always loved it rough, and of course they both didn't mind a little bit of spontaneous sex where they did not wash up before. What's with these things? Curiosity hits him on who Park Jimin is becoming. The ding sound of the elevator distracts him from his thoughts. They both walk out from the elevator. "Is it like your sex bag? Do you always have them ready?"
"I thought I'd sleep over at my parent's tonight, but they're in that mysterious meeting. It can be a sex bag since I've got mostly everything I need in it." Jimin says as he waits for Jungkook to scan his finger. The door is opened, and Jungkook steps aside for him to get in first.
"Do you want anything to drink?" The lights turn on, and Jungkook walks toward the fridge. "I've got some sparkling wine. The sweet kind. Do you like them?"
"Moscato? It's my favorite kind of sparkling. " Jimin takes off his shoes.
"I knew it's something you'd like." Oh no, Jungkook didn't just get a few bottles of sweet sparkling wine because he expects that they'll be having sex soon. Jungkook just happened to drive past the wine store that's not on his way home and went in to get the best kind of Moscato sparkling wine which he can get someone do that for him.
"How would you know that?" Jimin tilts his head.
"I tasted it for the first time not long ago, and the taste itself reminds me of you. It's the taste you'd like."
"Well, lots of people like that kind of taste. Not just me." Jimin places his bag on one of the kitchen stools. "It's pretty easy to tell."
"I'm one of those people who doesn't like sweets when it comes to alcohol."
"But still, most people like it."
"Not me, and still, I'm right that you like it."
What point is Jungkook trying to make here? Jungkook is sure about his point. He just wants to imply that he still knows Jimin well after years. He just can't directly express it, but Jimin seems to get the idea of Jungkook's point, but he decides that it's best to ignore this nonsense.
Why ruin the mood by focusing on Jungkook's sweet acts?
"Can I go and freshen up now? So we can finally do it." Straightforward and upfront Park Jimin just doesn't see the point of small talk.
"Ah yeah. It's over there right beside the stairs." Jungkook leads as he speaks, turning on the light. "Is this ok? Are you comfortable? Or do you want to use min-"
"This is fine. It looks so new and clean." Jimin places his bag on the black granite counter.
"Yeah, I barely use it. I mean this bathroom is barely used." Jungkook informs.
"Not even your guests?" Jimin raises his eyebrows.
"I don't usually have guests here. Namjoon and Suga hyung visited once, and they were uncomfortable with how uncomfortable I was, having someone at my place."
"What about Bo Gum hyung?"
"I hang at his place. We mostly go out to hang."
"Ah. I didn't know you're so strict about people coming to your place." Jimin starts to take out his small blue pouch along with the bigger one. Jungkook assumes one is for facial and another is for body.
"Yeah, it happened when I had this apartment as my own. I love the idea of having my own privacy so much."
"Tae is also like that." Jimin chuckles. "You guys don't want your comfort zone being disturbed."
Jungkook tilts his head. "Are you like that too?"
"Depends. As long as they keep clean. I can always clean and cleanse my place after. I don't mind. That's why me and Tae always have parties at my place when we arrange one." Jimin chuckles again as he gets the facial tissue out from the bag before he gets another bigger pouch.
"I wouldn't like people coming over. I understand him." Jungkook listens. "So there's a lot of people visiting your place."
Jimin gulps as he takes out a shampoo bottle and conditioner from one of the blue pouches. "Yeah, there were times when I had people over." Silent takes over as Jimin takes out his body wash and his after wash lotion out from another pouch. "What about your flings? You don't do it here?"
"My bedroom? Don't even think about it. None of my fling has ever come here though." Jungkook glances at Jimin who takes his small bottle of hair serum out.
"No one? At all?" Jimin furrows his eyebrows as he grabs his facial washing gel out from another pouch.
"Mhm. We go to the hotel. I don't feel comfortable going to someone's place. The ones I'm not close to I mean."
"Makes sense." Jimin gulps again. "We can go to the hotel if you want."
"There's always an exception." Jungkook mentions, wetting his lips, thinking whether he should say the next sentence. "You are Jimin. You can come as much as you want. You get to hang out anywhere in my apartment. Even my bedroom."
No words are being uttered. Jimin just starts to pump the cleaning oil onto his hand before he rubs the liquid on his face in circle directions as it's so normal to wash his face in front of someone. As if Jungkook's words never happened.
Of course, cleaning his face right away in front of Jungkook was not in his plan, but his stomach twisted at the words. He needs distraction.
To kill the silence, Jungkook comes up with a question he's already been curious about. "How many pouches do you own? You do own many of them."
"Well, I need them. The bottles. They spill. " Jimin gulps. "It takes forever to clean up when they do. You already know that."
"Yeah, I remember that. You used to put everything together, and I had to clean everything for you because you were lazy and insisted on buying everything new." Jungkook chuckles.
"Ah." Jimin doesn't know how to react. The flashback of how Jungkook used to complain about how messy he was does make his stomach uncomfortable. "Yeah, I was that messy." He shifts his gaze down the floor.
"I remember complaining about it so hard. There were many trips like that." Jungkook reminds. "I was super mad at that time we were on school camp. I wanted to go hiking with the class, but I had to clean things up for you."
"Mhm. I remember that. You shouldn't have to though. Did not have to." Jimin mumbles before he presses his lips into a thin line. Well, if he was such a burden, why didn't Jungkook just leave him alone. "You could have gone for those fun things."
"But I had not, had I?"
"That's why I said you didn't hav-"
"I complained, but I stayed every time, didn't I?" Jungkook's tone turns serious. The pair of big doe eyes stare right into Jimin's crescent ones. He steps forward towards Jimin who's stepping back. "I was willing to do all those things for you." Jungkook's arm starts to travel on Jimin's waist.
"You did complain a lot, but oh well, it's in the past anywa-" Jimin rests his oily fist on Jungkook's clothed chest. He still has that cleansing oil on his hands.
"Because I wanted to go have fun, but I couldn't leave you with those messes. Of course I was supposed to be mad." Jungkook still stares at Jimin who now shifts his gaze away.
This is too intense. What kind of energy is this? What's with the serious gentle voice and gentle touch on his waist. Stay strong Park Jimin. It's just a gesture. A gesture before sex, but what's point is Jungkook trying to make?
Jimin's eyes grow bigger when Jungkook tugs his bang behind his ear. Caressing one of his cheekbones with his thumb.
"I wasn't a good listener, but I made sure to stick by your side." For some reason, Jungkook felt like he wanted to say it. As if he wants Jimin to at least remember the good things he's done for Jimin. "I complained, but I never left or refused to help. I always stayed as your go to person." Jungkook just wants some credits.
"You didn't let me join when you went clubbing." Jimin lets it slip. He's actually talking about something that happened too many years ago. Something he won't admit that still affects him. "You left me out so hard on that." Jimin almost rolls his eyes, remembering how neglected he was feeling.
"You were young."
"You were young too."
"You were too..." too cute to be looked at by those lads. Jungkook pauses.
"Too?" Jimin tilts his head, still feeling Jungkook's thumb on his face.
"Too pure."
"Pure?" Jimin gulps again.
"You didn't deserve to be looked at hungrily."
Jimin chuckles. "So it's only you who could do it?" He asks a bold question because it's only Jungkook back then who was so obvious with his hunger. "You still do it though. Those hungry eyes of yours."
"Is it ok for you?" Serious tone is still from Jungkook.
"What is ok for me?"
"If I want to be the only person who can look at you like that? Would you be ok with that?"
Jungkook just said what? Jimin's lips parted. This is... well... straight forward. "Things changed, Jungkook. Don't be funny" His gaze shifts down, trying to, again, mask his emotion, pushing the thick chest away but fail to do so.
Why is Jungkook like this? Why be extremely flirty like this?
"Things really changed on my side too, Jimin." Jungkook uses his finger to lift Jimin's chin up. "Tell me what can I do? For you to give me a chance to make it all up." He looks into Jimin's eyes, trying to look for the glimpse of warmth that Jimin still has for him. The crescent eyes that screams affection. Jungkook always tried to avoid the butterflies he felt.
Jimin's eyes get soft as he's mesmerized by how Jungkook is being. Almost high. Almost drowned in Jeon Jungkook's spell. If it's years ago, Jimin might have already been on the floor, melting. However, things aren't the same. "Firstly," Jimin lets out a sign while putting his arms around Jungkook's nape. "You can skip all the bullshit." He utters.
"They're not bullshit." Jungkook tightens his grip on Jimin's waist. Only a tiny bit. "I'm dead serious about m-"
The question itself is tempting, but it's not safe. Therefore, Jimin decides to shut Jungkook up with a kiss. A hungry kiss where Jimin bites on Jungkook's bottom lip. Yes, that would fix everything, for now. At least, he can make Jungkook forget and stop continuing this uncomfortable talk.
"Jimin. I'd do anyth-"
And if stubborn Jungkook doesn't stop with this topic already, Park Jimin will then shut him up again with another kiss, sucking on Jungkook's lip while licking on it, repeatedly. It does come off quite aggressive in Jungkook's eyes, but he won't deny any kisses from Park Jimin. He likes it like this too.
It's not easy for Jungkook to pull away from the kiss he's high on, but he needs to talk things out. Not sure if this is the best situation to have this kind of conversation, but for Jungkook, they need to make things clear before sex happens. "Jimin." He grabs both of Jimin's shoulders before he pushes the smaller body away a little. "I'm serious. Can't we talk? Can we please talk about things that happened. I have things I want to explain."
Jimin lets out a frustrating sigh. "I don't want to talk." He then pulls Jungkook's nape close to him.
Needy.
Pushing his body against the bigger body, Jimin stares into Jungkook's eyes. "We're supposed to do something else instead of talking." He glances at Jungkook's thin lips. "The quicker I get to take a shower, the quicker we can finally... do it."
"Jimin. All I'm asking for is a chance." Jungkook looks right back at Jimin's lips too, and Park Jimin knows too well that licking his own lips would affect Jungkook at the right amount since the taller of the two leans in for a gentle kiss. Too gentle for Jimin's liking.
"Do you want to do it, or no?" Jimin starts to roam his hand down to Jungkook's pants button, unbuttoning it slowly before he starts to unzip. "If you want to talk, we might not end up doing it." He rubs on Jungkook's waistband gently.
Seems like Needy Jimin is not willing to talk, and Jungkook doesn't want to ruin the mood. He wants a chance to talk things out, but this is also his chance to get close to Jimin. The closest he can get right now. "I don't mind." Jungkook states, closing his eyes as he gulps at Jimin's sensual touch on his body. "We can talk. I don't mind not doing it."
What? Jimin tilts his head, looking at Jungkook's sincere eyes. What is happening? Jungkook wants to talk things out. He is literally rejecting their sex to talk to him? Jimin then inhales deeply before he gives one peck on Jungkook's lips. "We'll talk when I'm done taking a shower. Will you go and take a shower too?"
"Yeah. I'll do that." Jungkook assures.
"Ok." The smaller of the two then turns back to his pouches to grab more things for the shower.
"Jimin-ah." Jungkook still stands on his spot. "We're talking, right? You're giving me a chance, right?"
"Please go take a shower. I'll see you in a bit." Jimin walks towards Jungkook who steps back. He keeps walking until Jungkook is out the door.
Closing the door, leaning on the door, Jimin touches his chest, trying to breath and process about what just happened.
Chance? What kind of chance Jungkook was talking about? What kind of chance Jungkook is asking for? To make things up? But what kind of things? Is Jungkook making up for things that happened a long time ago with that girl at the party? But why? Is Jungkook into him now? But then why did Jungkook disappear all those years? Is he asking for a chance to explain about that? Or even making it up, but how? How exactly would Jungkook make things better when the glass was already broken? Things really changed. He evolved so much.
Curious, but no, Jimin is not ready to talk at all. He won't admit that it's too painful to even talk about all those things. Not sure if he's ready to hear what Jungkook has to explain. The way Jungkook disappeared like that left a wound in his heart, but Jimin won't be pathetic to say how painful it was.
Anger and pain aside. Jimin is not planning to hurt Jungkook back. It feels nice to have Jungkook close at this level. Of course, Jimin still has a thing for his thick body and handsome face, but Jungkook needs to know where he stands. It's Jimin's plan to put Jungkook in sex category. Jimin needs to let him know that it's not in Jungkook's hands to walk back into his life with more mix signals. Jungkook doesn't get to treat him nicely like real friends. No friendship.
Plus, he misses sex. So much. And sex with Jungkook is a bonus. No doubt. It's only comfortable. It's what Jimin has been trying to tell himself or making himself believe. He gets to choose. He gets to lead.
And being vulnerable because of Jungkook's genuine sweetness is not at all an option. It's only safe this way. Only sexual relationship feels safe. Jimin went through that kind of pain twice, but no way will he go through it the third time because at the end, it's only Jimin who saves himself from pain. It takes too much energy, and he'd rather focus on his career.
Like how he promised himself, no guys will ever stop or slowing him down from making his career happen.
Therefore, instead of wearing a t-shirt and shorts, Park Jimin walks out of the bathroom only with his dark blue robes. He makes sure that it's obvious enough that he's wearing nothing under.
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End of chapter
A/N: I'm back!