I sigh in frustration as I stare down at the blank piece of paper. I twirl my newly sharpened pencil between my fingers and on the odd occasion, I tap it lightly against the wooden desk Sophie gave me a few days ago.
I was supposed to arrive in Paris today. Right now I'm supposed to be knocking on my aunt's door and start training to be a proper lady and begin my search for a husband. Needless to say, I expect my aunt will send word to my mother soon enough when I don't show up so I'll send a letter to both of them first. Only I can't seem to find the right words.
Frustrated, I toss the pencil against the wall and slump my head down onto the desk.
"Why is this so difficult!" I scream.
"I'm not entirely sure what you're up to but I'm pretty sure yelling won't solve the problem," a man chuckles from the direction of the doorway.
I look up and glare at Adrien, he smirks and casually leans against the frame his arms crossed over his chest.
"You standing there looking all smug doesn't help," I growl at him through clenched teeth which only seem to amuse him and he snickers.
He pushes himself away from the doorway and saunters over to my bed and takes a seat.
"What are you doing there anyway?"
"Making a list of all the ways I can kill you."
He laughs and despite how much he irritated me only a few minutes ago I found myself laughing with him. "Seriously what are you doing?" he asks as he lies down.
Sighing I turn around in my chair so that I am now facing him.
"I am trying to write some letters."
"Letters?"
"To my mother and aunt. I'm supposed to arrive in Paris today and I figured the least I should do is inform both of them that I will not follow their rules and will be living my own life."
He moves my pillows over to prop his head up so that he can look me in the eye.
He smirks. "So basically you're sending fuck you letters."
I raise my eyebrows.
"Excuse me."
"Fuck you letters. They are letters you send to people who you hate and you politely tell them fuck you for whatever reason. I knew a guy who once sent a letter like that to his wife who left him for a baker."
"That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard of... but yeah that's basically what I'm doing."
I turn back around and pick up my pencil. Resting on my elbow I pinch the bridge of my nose with my two forefingers and release a long sigh.
"Why is this so hard for you?" he asks me, his voice laced with curiosity.
"I'm not sure," I mumble.
The mattress creaks as he jumps up. "Well, I'll leave you to it," he walks over to the door but before he leaves he turns back around and smiles at me. Gesturing toward the piece of paper which so far only contains the words Dear mother he says, "Don't hold back."
Closing the door behind him I quietly listen to him walk away and down the stairs.
"Don't hold back," I whisper and with a beaming smile on my face, I move my pencil across the page, the words fueled by hatred flowing from me.
Dear Mother
I have allowed you to control my life for far too long and it ends now.
Father always noticed and celebrated the potential I had. He knew I was destined for more than the simple life you have planned for me. I could never understand why you couldn't see me the same way he did, I never comprehended why you were forcing me to become you, but now I know it is because you are stupid and a putain sans cervelle.
My new friend told me that I shouldn't hold back while writing this letter so here is something that I have always wanted to say to you. Some days I wished that you had died in that fire and not Papa. It would have saved me a lot of misery and at least if that were true I wouldn't have had to leave my home to find true happiness.
In the spirit of no longer allowing you to dictate my life, I will not be going to Paris. I will not become a proper lady and I will not marry some brainless and vile man who only sees me as a breeder for his family.
I have come across a beautiful little town during my travels and I will be staying here for good. The people here treat me as one of their own which is far more than I can say about you, Aunt Mary, and those spineless creatures I sadly have to call my brothers.
Do not bother yourself by sending anyone to come to take me away, you know that Papa taught me to fight and I will use those skills to take down anyone you send.
Goodbye, Mother, rot in hell, and I pray I will never see you again.
Valerie
I wrote a short letter to my aunt explaining the new situation to her and sealed them both into separate envelopes.
With the sealed letters clutched in my hand, I rush to the post office and hand them over to the man behind the counter.
As I walk back to the inn I spot Gaston standing outside what I can only assume and hope is his house. In his one hand, he is grasping a half-empty bottle of wine, and in the other a broom that he is using to push small piles of dust off of his front step.
Letters to my mother and aunt haven't even been the only thing on my mind.
For the last two days, I keep thinking back to my encounter at the castle and the promise I made to Maurie to bring him some book that Gaston stole. A book that might contain the knowledge that might help Maurie cure the Beast.
Even though I hold no desire to help that monster I still feel a sense of obligation to help Maurie and the others who are trapped within the castle. After all the curse isn't their fault, they should not have to suffer for something he did.
To get the book I need access to Gaston's house. Since we don't go there for training I had to think of a different way, and I believe I have found it.
"Good morning, Gaston," I cheerfully greet him careful not to make too much noise for I know he is most likely hungover in addiction to being tipsy.
Started by my sudden appearance he drops the broom but manages to keep a firm grip on the bottle.
"Oh... hello, Valerie. Why are you here, I'm certain we don't have a training session today?" he asks with a slight slur in his voice.
Nervously I start to pick at my fingernails. I hope this plan works. "No we don't, but last night I was wondering if perhaps you had any spare work for me?"
He snorts and takes a sip of the wine. "You want me to give you a job around here? Doesn't Sophie give you enough work over there at the inn?"
"It's not like that, it's just I want to learn all that I can from you and I thought that spending more time together would help with that. But I don't just want to barge in on you so I figured maybe I could work around your house and you can teach me while I'm working." I shrug, hoping that he will see and agree with my logic.
He doesn't say anything for a while, he just silently stares at me and takes a few sips of wine in between. Finally, he sets the now empty bottle down and starts nodding his head.
"Yes, that's some good thinking. I don't know how much time I have left and spending more time together would help with your training. And as a matter of fact, I could use some help around my house, come inside I'll show you."
I follow him inside and almost gasp at the state of his home.
Papers scatter the dirty floors, dust on almost every surface, filthy clothing lounges around and so many other signs which all show that this house hasn't been properly looked after in a very long time.
"Le Fou used to help me tidy up but since he died I've been quiet... neglectful. We can split up the training days, some days we will do our usual training, and some days we can work on the house. While we work I can tell you some stories and important things I want to live on after I'm dead."
"That works for me."
"Good, I'll see you tomorrow then."
"See you tomorrow."
Just before I leave I take one last look at the room. My eyes settle on a pile of books that have been carelessly left on the floor stacked up in a sloppy pile. There wasn't much to take note of except for one that was covered in a purple cover and had an array of strange symbols on it.
A small smile tugs on my lips at the sight of it. Maurie had told me that I would know the book when I saw it and, my God he was right.
Translation:
putain sans cervelle= brainless whore (yeah she didn't hold back there)