First of all; hi guys, welcome back! Second, this may or may not take you more than an hour to read because it is hella long again (please grab a snack) and I therefore did not proof-read so I'm sure there are some mistakes. And third; despite it being the briefest mention, I have to say that this chapter mentions suicide (again, very, very briefly). That being said, please leave comments and update me on your lives!
July 14, 2024
There were two girls instead of one on the backseat of their Audi that afternoon, and there would be two for the next three months. It was weird, to say the least. Katya could not stop glancing in the rearview mirror as she drove into the city, the girls' soft chatter filling her ears.
Taking in another girl was definitely not on their schedule. They were supposed to be holiday planning; looking for fun things to do around their holiday home, buy pool floaties, and Katya was supposed to take the break she promised Natasha; letting everything with her mom settle down, give it time to process.
But priorities had shifted, their help was needed once more, so they threw all those plans out the window and made new ones.
Easy when you're spy-trained to adapt quickly and be flexible.
Luckily, Jordyn had started to warm up to them too. It went incredibly slowly, her anxiety in the way most of the time, but she spoke up every now and then. She'd dared to ask Katya if she'd called her work yet and settled everything with her boss, and she'd told Natasha her shirt looked nice.
Most of the time, though, she was silent and tense, afraid of overstepping or doing something wrong. She was used to getting yelled at, probably. In a way, she acted a lot like Maya when she first came home; constantly feeling a need to prove herself so she could stay; be useful. A survival instinct that played up but Katya hoped would settle down soon, hopefully as the days progressed and Jordyn learned this family's routines and habits.
''Don't be nervous.'' Maya's reassuring voice reached Katya's ears, not meant for her, but rather for the new best friend she'd made. ''My mom will talk to yours and it'll be fine.''
But despite her best efforts, Jordyn shook her head. ''My mom is not going to let me leave that easily.'' Her gaze stayed locked on things within the car, never daring to glance outside and see how close they were to their destination.
''Then you haven't met my mom. She can convince pretty much anyone of anything.''
''Which is incredibly sexy,'' Natasha muttered under her breath; too soft for the girls to hear, but loud enough for Katya.
Talking to Jordyn's mother wasn't something the brunette looked forward to. It made the most sense that it would be her, but she wished she could push Natasha inside that house and throw the door closed behind her. Not fair exactly, but she started to get tired of difficult conversations filled with heavy stuff. Stupid, yes, especially since she was the one in need of those talks usually, but her brain needed a serious break after this. More serious than the one before this.
Katya suppressed a sigh when she parked the car in front of the small house, hating the silence that took over once the engine, radio, and aircon died. Right after lunch, like right now, the sun burned on the black paint of their family car relentlessly despite it only being July. Sweat immediately gathered in her hands once that cool flow of air-conditioned wind stopped, but that could also be the growing nerves.
Her body turned around in the leather seat, catching Jordyn's gaze without trouble. And that's when she realized she wasn't the most nervous one. ''I want you to know that I'm going in there without prejudice. I want to hear her out first.'' Even though she had her opinion at the ready, there were always two sides to the story, no matter how much she trusted Jordyn's word. Call it leftover training from working in the intelligence business.
''Okay.'' Jordyn nodded without conviction; her expression quite hard to read, like she wasn't sure what to think of it. Maybe she thought they didn't believe her.
''Sit tight. I'll call you in.'' A small smile managed to find its way onto Katya's lips as she blindly reached for the door handle behind her. But the brief glance Natasha got from her was way less confident and reassuring, the nerves pooling in the blue of her eyes. The redhead gave her an encouraging nod and a small whisper.
''Good luck.''
It felt strangely like walking that path up to Alena's front door, every step only bringing her an inch closer to Jordyn's house. And just like then, Katya knew that her presence had already been noted - it took a suspiciously short amount of time for another brunette to open the door after she rang the bell.
Jordyn's mother must be around ten years older than her, the lines in her face clearly visible around her eyes and forehead. Her hair appeared a tad bit dry and dull of color. It held neither a curl nor it was completely straight; someone who didn't know how to treat their curls. She was small, of bigger build, but despite the sweet kindergarten teacher vibes, had a sharp shimmer in her eyes for the stranger on her doorstep.
She looked absolutely nothing like Jordyn, and Katya was immediately suspicious of her.
''Hello. Let me introduce myself. I'm Katya, former Avenger, and I'm here to talk about your daughter.'' The title may or may not have been dropped on purpose - it totally was - to warn the woman of trying to bullshit her. Yet Jordyn's mother barely looked impressed, rather pissed off, Katya would say, her face falling visibly.
''What did she do?''
A wave of annoyance and protectiveness washed over the brunette, who had to force herself to stay calm. She had to play the long game and prevent an early argument, but the fact that the woman's first emotion wasn't worry, said more about her qualities as a mother than Jordyn. ''What makes you think that she did something?''
''Well, if an Avenger is here, it can't be much good.'' The woman stepped aside to let Katya in, closing the door behind them. And while her back was still turned, the Russian clenched her jaw and took in the interior of the small home to distract herself from saying something irreversible. The furniture was old, well-used, clearly showing that this family didn't have a lot of money to spend, but still a long way from looking poor. Everything was just a bit... outdated.
''That's where you're wrong,'' she replied, taking a seat on the grey couch and shuffling to the edge. It felt like a good idea to start at the beginning, a recap of how she knew Jordyn in the first place. ''Jordyn and I know each other from the gym classes she joined.''
Jordyn's mother followed her without offering her something to eat or drink, choosing not to sit next to her, but rather in the armchair that was placed by the couch. It squeaked awkwardly. ''You teach? What kind of classes?''
Again, there was an edge to her voice Katya could not fully place. Skepticism, or dislike.
''Self-defense for women.''
''Fighting?'' She tried to correct her with an eyebrow raised, as if she had caught Katya using another word to cover up what was truly taught.
''Exclusively self-defense,'' Katya corrected sharply, hating when others accused her of something untrue. But the lies she'd been telling her whole career - also to the public - hadn't made her word very trustworthy, so Jordyn's mother didn't lower her eyebrow either. ''Anyway, we've barely talked to each other besides that - I barely even considered her a friend - yet Jordyn still called me last night, distressed, saying you two had a fight.''
''Yes, that's true.'' The woman - Katya had never gotten her name, though she looked like a Barbara - nodded calmly. Barbara didn't seem impressed by the accusation at all. And if that meant that she wasn't bothered by the fight either, was hard to tell.
Katya's eyes narrowed slightly, although her voice stayed businesslike. ''She wouldn't tell me what happened, but I couldn't leave her outside to sleep. So, I picked her up and she stayed over at me and my wife's house, in case you were wondering where she was all this time.'' The jab at the end was necessary, but Barbara didn't react as Katya expected.
''Of course, I wonder and worry where she goes, but I can't reach her anymore.'' Hints of saddened frustration seeped into her voice, her brows furrowing. ''It's like whatever I say goes in one ear and out the other.''
Katya tilted her head, finally feeling like they were getting somewhere that would validate Jordyn's story and give more information on the severity of her problems. ''What do you mean by that?'' Her brain worked on full power to read the woman's face and everything she didn't say.
Barbara sighed inaudibly, shifting to the edge of her seat and tugging her shirt down in the process. ''Jordyn's father left a long time ago, so it has been the two of us ever since, and we used to be so close because of it. We would do everything together; gossip, go on long holidays, shop for days.''
A gloss had settled over her eyes, lost in the memories. But a brief shake of her head ridded them of it, her eyes now dropping to the floor.
''But then she suddenly changed; started to isolate herself, kept secrets, stopped talking... We barely argued before, and now we have fights every day. I don't recognize my own daughter anymore.''
Bingo, Katya thought, immediately summoning all her skills to subtly pry information out of someone. Jordyn's mother was a tricky one, who knew when she was being played, but whose downfall was being self-absorbed.
''When did that start?'' She asked, ignoring what emotions swarmed in her body in favor of hearing out the woman first.
Barbara's eyebrows nearly met in the middle. ''Almost a year ago, now. The beginning of August, I think. She always went out a lot with her friends during the summer break.''
''Out?''
''Entertainment parks, clubbing, shopping, the beach... You know. She had a good couple of friends, which she hasn't seen in a while.''
The uneasy feeling surrounding Jordyn's trauma grew stronger in Katya's chest. Or, more so, the cause of that trauma. There was only one person who could ever tell them what had truly happened to her, and that was Jordyn herself.
''Did you ever stop to think about why she changed?'' Katya continued delicately, and something within Jordyn's mother's brain switched back from sad mom to annoyed mom. A huff left her lips as her body leaned back in the chair.
''Well, she's a teenager, so I'm thinking boyfriend, hormones, rebellious period. Maybe even drugs, but I never found anything that pointed to that.'' She shook her head. ''Honestly, I have just been trying to handle her and haven't gotten any time to think about why. No matter what it is, she's gotten quite rude and lazy. She doesn't do the laundry when I ask, prefers to sleep the whole day on weekends, and her room is a mess. She says she can't do anything, but I don't buy it.''
It took everything within Katya to not blow up in her face, starting with a deep breath and counting backwards from five before even thinking about opening her mouth. The things the woman had said hit her personally, but she could handle people saying stuff about her. However, she grew very protective of those going through the same thing who weren't so keen on standing up for themselves.
''You should listen to her. Jordyn is not lying about anything.'' Katya decided to bet on her status as an Avenger to make this woman believe her. ''As a former spy specialized in human behavior and the mind, I know for a fact that she shows signs of serious mental health problems, probably caused by something traumatic that she went through.''
Now that, that was news to Barbara. Her eyebrows slowly raised on her forehead, like she'd just been told that water could catch fire.
''What sort of traumatic thing?''
Katya shook her head, allowing a hint of the immense worry she felt to show on her face. ''I don't know, it could be anything. It must have happened right before she changed. But it's currently eighty degrees out and she's wearing long pants and sleeves. On top of that, she doesn't like physical contact.'' Her head bowed, hands fiddling with the rings on her finger as her voice grew quieter. ''So, I believe we should think about assault.''
The room grew quiet for a moment, allowing those words to linger in the air painfully. Barbara's forehead must be hurting by now, her eyebrows nearing her hairline in shock. ''What?'' It appeared to be the only thing she could utter.
''You have to understand that she behaves this way because she's literally sick,'' Katya quickly continued, hoping to get to her while she was still vulnerable and open to more information. ''She can't help it. She physically can't clean her room or get out of bed, her brain won't let her. The isolation, the sleeping, the inability to do things, they're all signs of depression.''
''Depression,'' Jordyn's mother repeated bluntly, her eyebrows falling. ''Are you sure?''
When Katya nodded, she could see the hesitation start to seep in again. But she didn't doubt herself over this. ''You should have sat down and listened to her, saw through her behavior you classified as 'problematic' and realized there was more to it. If you didn't do that because of your character, or because the general knowledge of mental health issues and their signs is so limited under the people, I can't say. But Jordyn is at serious risk of falling down a very black hole if she doesn't get the help she needs immediately.''
Again, the reaction that followed wasn't the one she expected. Jordyn's mother didn't appear like someone who appreciated being told off, especially by strangers, and Katya fully expected to get yelled at, but the woman stayed awfully quiet. Possibly, she started to realize just how bad things actually were with her daughter. Although Katya doubted she faulted herself for anything.
''I don't want to fight with her. I love her, and I just want to go back to how things were.''
''You have to understand that things won't ''go back to how they were'','' Katya clarified, briefly clenching her jaw as all the typical clichés played out. Not-understanding mother rushing her daughter to get better so the hard times may be gone as soon as possible. Check. ''They'll get better with the right help, sure, but Jordyn won't be the same person she was before. Unlike something as simple as a broken leg, a mental illness lingers forever.''
Barbara's eyebrow raised skeptically. ''So you can't fix her?''
Katya's face hardened, her hands itching to literally slap some sense into her. She could deal with some bullshit, but this was a lot of bullshit to deal with at once. ''There's no such easy thing as ''fixing her''.'' Her tone was a lot sharper than she wanted it to be. ''It will need months, if not years of therapy to allow her to live her life more comfortably. But she'll most likely never be ''fixed'' completely. Try gluing the pieces of a broken vase together. You'll forever see the cracks. Getting her the help she needs will hopefully take away most of the darkness she finds herself in.''
Jordyn's mother narrowed her eyes, picking up on Katya's annoyed vibes. ''Isn't she just tired? I don't get all these invisible illnesses nowadays.''
Her hands itched even more.
''I can assure you that Jordyn is more than just tired. If you look at her and can't see that, then you indeed don't get it.''
And in that moment, they'd found themselves in a stand-off.
''And who are you to lecture me on this, on what's best for my daughter?''
''Someone who went through the same thing and almost killed herself for it.''
That effectively and wholly shut her up.
Katya let a shaky breath escape her lips. ''Don't be startled, but Jordyn won't be coming home for now. What she needs is peace and a safe environment where she feels comfortable, and I think you understand why that isn't here. Besides that, she needs someone who understands what she's going through.'' She could speak freely, Jordyn's mother still too shocked to respond. ''Jordyn has agreed to stay with us for the summer, and my wife and I will be providing and paying for a college dorm for her from there on out. Same for professional help.''
Jordyn's mother shook her head, slowly returning to her senses. ''If you think I'm just going to let her go like that...'' She protested, though it sounded weak.
''Respectfully, ma'am, Jordyn is older than eighteen and can legally decide for herself,'' Katya told her, to which the woman nodded defeated. She knew she was out of arguments and options, and despite her attitude and self-centered view, the tiniest part of Katya felt bad for a fellow mother. ''I promise, my only goal is to help her.'' Again, a sad nod, so Katya stood from the couch after deciding the conversation ended there. ''I'll call her in to get her stuff. I think it's best if you stay in here.''
Preferably, she would have liked to rush out of that living room with big steps, so it took all willpower to keep her stride normal until the door to the hallway closed behind her. It was incredible how easily a confident and brave attitude could befall her when she willed it to, but as Katya took a couple deep breaths in that quiet hallway, she noticed her hands were shaking.
Maybe the things said had hit her harder than she'd thought.
But then there was Natasha when she opened the front door, leaning against the side of the car with her arms crossed over her chest. That concerned look on her face when her head whipped up from staring at the tips of her shoes had all the stress leaving Katya's body instantly.
Natasha's eyes held a question, one which Katya answered with a brief smile and a nod, to which the redhead's shoulders relaxed and she stopped digging her fingertips into her upper arms nervously. It must have been too hot to stay inside the car, since Maya and Jordyn had opted for a seat on the curb in the shadow of a nearby tree too. They all looked as tense as the atmosphere felt.
''Hey!'' Katya called out softly, holding onto the front door with one hand while using the other to beckon over Jordyn, who shot to her feet instantly. ''Go pack your stuff.'' She smiled when the blonde had rushed over to her.
Her eyes widened in disbelief. ''She's letting me go?''
''I'm not giving her a choice.'' Katya held open the door for her, and after a moment of hesitation, Jordyn stepped inside her own home. The brunette was so glad to give her this good news, to take away a small but heavy part of the weight on her shoulders. Without having to tiptoe around her mother, she could hopefully start to worry about herself more. ''Do you want me to help, or do you got it?''
''I got it.'' Jordyn assured with a weak smile, jogging up the stairs quickly to pack three months' worth of stuff.
''There's no need to rush!'' Katya called after her, but still she heard lots of quick movements upstairs; closet doors being thrown open, suitcases and bags zipped open, and some squeaking that must be the shower door.
Deciding the hallway was the best place to wait - in case Jordyn did need help or her mom got the wild idea to sneak up to her daughter - Katya leaned back against the wood panels of the wall, arms folding over her chest. A headache worked hard to creep up on her; a combination of the heat, stress, and a lack of sleep. She made a mental note to take a nap later, after dinner. Gosh, this day was so busy.
She grew into a statue, waiting patiently for what felt like fifteen minutes or so while completely zoning out, thinking about the next few weeks; what must be done, be planned, be confirmed. She was damn glad to have Natasha helping her, because she had no clue where to start.
''Kat?''
Katya jumped when her nickname was called, blinking the blurriness in her vision away to find Jordyn's head poking out from the top of the stairs. The blonde had an apologetic look on her face, grimacing sheepishly. She'd changed her clothes.
''Can you maybe carry one of my bags? I think I packed too much.''
A relaxed smile curled on Katya's lips. ''Is there such a thing?'' she teased, pushing away from the wall. But gosh, was she glad for gym training, because the suitcase Jordyn lowered weighed a ton, the small plastic wheels hitting the wooden floor a tad too hard.
The woman came down with a large gym bag filled with stuff too, and one empty one, in which she put about five pairs of shoes from the hallway closet and two jackets from the coat rack Lastly, she picked up the tiny cactus that she had placed on the stairs for safekeeping, struggling to hold her heavy bag in one hand. Then, she turned to Katya, awaiting further instructions.
''Ready?'' Katya asked. Jordyn nodded, the realness of this moment finally hitting her as her face paled slightly. Moving out of her childhood home was a big deal, no matter the circumstances, and Katya sympathized with her. ''Do you want to say goodbye?''
It took a moment, but Jordyn eventually nodded again, very hesitant. It led Katya to believe that perhaps things would work out between mother and daughter one day. They both clearly loved each other, and with some hard work from her mom's side, Jordyn may just forgive her for this.
Katya knocked on the living room door for good measure, slowly opening it to find Barbara in the exact same spot as before, although she shot up at the sight of her daughter. Her face barely betrayed anything as she noted the bag and cactus in Jordyn's hands, but Katya knew she must feel regret and pain. It was still her daughter who she chased out of the house with her attitude.
Jordyn shifted her weight around uneasily, glancing at her feet and then up again. ''Bye, mom,'' she squeezed out when her mom neither moved nor said anything. That may also have to do with Katya acting as some sort of buffer between the two of them. In the end, everyone respected an Avenger.
Her mother gave the smallest of smiles. ''Bye, honey.''
When nobody said anything after that, and Jordyn grew more uncomfortable by the second, Katya nodded at the older woman. ''My wife will contact you.'' Because, respectfully, Natasha stood just that tad bit further away from Jordyn and this situation, and could handle business with Barbara more objectively and emotionally neutral. Better for Katya, better for everyone.
When that door closed and Barbara fell out of sight, relief washed over the brunette, knowing the hard part was done. And deciding she didn't want to spend another minute in this house, she picked up the suitcase and bag by the door and stepped outside, Jordyn on her heels.
The sun hitting her face was the reality check she needed, her eyes squinting to see anything. It made everything that happened inside that small house feel a lot less distant and real, like a fever dream. But sadness radiated into her back.
''You okay?'' Katya glanced over her shoulder, brows furrowed with worry.
Jordyn nodded, although a frown lay on her forehead too as she dragged her heavy bag along. ''I just don't know what to think of her letting me go so easily.''
Katya understood that part. Jordyn spent hours yelling at her mother to listen to her, to make her understand that she's telling the truth, and now one grown-up tells her the same thing and her mother is suddenly willing to work along without too many questions asked? It sounded as suspicious as it felt, like they were waiting on the other shoe to drop.
''Do you want to hear my honest spy observation?'' Katya tilted her head. ''She does really love you, I don't doubt that, but she also truly does not get or believe in the mental aspect of it all. I don't know if that's her fault or not, but I can't say she's trying to understand it either.'' A smirk tugged at the corner of her mouth. ''I gave her something to think about, though, so who knows, maybe she'll change her mind.''
Jordyn raised her eyebrows skeptically, chuckling when Katya's face broke out into a huge grin. ''I wouldn't hold my breath.''
Laughing through the trauma, this behavior of theirs was called, and a little humor should be possible. Life wasn't all seriousness and misery, they should remember that
''What's with the cactus, by the way?'' Katya asked with a slight tease.
''It's my emotional support cactus.'' Jordyn explained with a straight face, but her act fell when Katya threw her a look. ''No, it's just the only one that didn't die.'' She laughed, Katya joining her in that soon after. The brunette had killed her own fair share of plants.
''Does it have a name?''
''Should it have a name?'' She countered weirdly.
Katya shrugged, suppressing her smirk as she continued to roll the suitcase and carry the bag towards the car. ''I don't know, you look like the kind of person who would name their plants.''
''It doesn't have one.''
''Maya, Jordyn's cactus needs a name,'' she called out to her daughter, who had come up to help right as Natasha opened the trunk. ''Any ideas?''
''Billy,'' the girl blurted out instantly, a wide smile pushing up her freckled cheeks.
Surprise took over Katya's features, staring at her dumbfounded. She didn't even notice Natasha taking the heavy sports bag from her and throwing it into the car. ''That was way too fast.''
But Jordyn barely considered it before shrugging, handing her bag over to Natasha too. ''His name can be Billy.''
As a result, Maya smiled proudly, reaching her hands out in a silent question to hold it. They fell into a conversation about the plant immediately after, no longer paying attention to the two Russians. And that was good, because Katya's eyebrows shot up when Natasha threw the bag next to the other in the trunk and effortlessly tossed the suitcase next to that like they both weighed absolutely nothing. Only when her lip started to hurt, did she realize it had found its way between her teeth.
''Damn, when are you going to manhandle me like that?'' she breathed, smirking when Natasha turned her head to give her a dry look. The redhead was used to her comments by now, and discarded it with a shake of her head, pushing the bags around to make sure they were secure.
''How did it go?''
The teasing expression fell from Katya's face, a frown replacing it as she shuffled in her spot. ''I honestly have no idea how to feel about it. Could have gone worse, could have gone better?''
Natasha took a step back and grabbed onto the trunk lid high above her head, finding nothing but that already-voiced insecurity on her wife's face. ''Well, as long as she doesn't make trouble...''
''I don't believe she will.''
''Okay.'' She smiled, slamming the lid shut and shaking her braid towards her back. Katya watched with interest as her body turned towards her, knowing Natasha was trying to relax her with one of those soft smiles. ''Make sure you take a breath, yeah? First step is done.''
She didn't realize how present the tension in her body was until her lungs sucked in a deep breath and slowly let it escape, allowing the stress to leave her system like a deflating balloon. Her chest could suddenly move up and down easier, the dry and warm summer air flowing through her nostrils like it was the first oxygen she got today.
Only when Natasha was content did she turn away, urging the others to climb into the boiling car too. She started the engine and turned the AC up all the way before everyone had secured their seatbelts, blasting the one and only songwriter of the decade from the speakers. A way to pump up the mood for sure.
''Are we going to the park now?'' Maya urged, cradling Billy in her hands delicately. She hadn't brought her soccer ball for it to stay in the car all day.
Katya chuckled at her enthusiasm, glancing at the backseat. ''Only if everyone is still up for it,'' she spoke pointedly, mostly looking at Jordyn. One shake of the blonde's head and she would abandon the plan right this instant, but it seemed they all could use a distraction as Jordyn nodded along with the other two. ''Then a promise is a promise.''
Bless Natasha for keeping a calmer head than the others and remembering to bring their picnic blanket to sit on, some snacks, and bottles of water, laying it all out in the shade of a tree on the edge of a big grass field in Central Park. Half of New York City had left the comfort of their homes to enjoy this sunny day outside. There were kids, dogs and elderly people everywhere, but that couldn't ruin the fun. It provided faint, happy background sounds.
Natasha had planted herself on her stomach on the checkered blanket, digging around in her bag before her. And while her denim shorts were nowhere near skimpy, Katya, who sat cross-legged next to her, had a hard time refraining herself from giving her ass a playful slap.
''Maya!'' She beckoned over the girl who passed the ball back and forth with a clumsy looking Jordyn a few feet away. When she jogged over, Natasha reached up to press a twenty-dollar bill into her hand. ''Here, go get some ice cream for you both.'' With a nod, she gestured to the ice cream van across the field.
Maya's eyes lit up like a child's, tightly securing her fingers around the money. ''Thank you!''
''As many scoops as you want!'' Natasha yelled after her when she dashed off.
''Yeey!'' With her ball under one arm, she called for her friend. ''Jo! We're getting ice cream!'' The two happily made a beeline for the van, Maya nearly skipping while Jordyn slowly followed, hands in the pockets of her hoodie. They were already showing some serious 'little sister, big sister'-potential.
Katya watched them leave with a wave of adoration flooding her eyes, the nickname her daughter called her friend echoing in her ears. ''Jo?'' She asked Natasha.
Natasha hummed, rolling to her back and shifting her hips around until she lay comfortable, pulling one knee up. ''She kept calling her Jo the whole time you were in the house.'' She flipped open the magazine she'd brought, holding it up in front of her face. Katya was too busy watching the girls to notice the tacky gossip magazine and comment on it.
''Gosh, that's adorable,'' she gushed, her heart swelling at the thought of Maya having someone else to do fun stuff with. Her moms were up for a game of soccer in the park, sure, but not always. Having a sister ensured a second chance at a game partner. Also, she had a feeling Jordyn would hurt anyone who tried to hurt Maya.
''She has your ability to make everyone her friend instantly,'' Natasha said, sounding slightly distracted by her reading. ''I think it's the dimples.''
Katya raised an eyebrow, slowly looking down at her wife and noting the amusement dancing in the green of her eyes. ''The dimples?'' Natasha hummed. ''Just because the dimples are your weakness, doesn't mean they're everyone else's.''
''Yes, they are. It's scientifically proven,'' she mused, flipping the page of her magazine.
''Mhm, and you're the scientist, right?'' Katya replied knowingly. Natasha smirked playfully, which was enough of an answer. ''What are you even reading? You hate that stuff.''
''I do. But I have to admit, it is entertaining.''
Katya rolled her eyes, afterwards training them on the backs of their two girls, still making their way across the field to the ice cream van. Sometimes, she hated Natasha's smugness. ''So what actor is screwing which singer, and who had a nip slip on the red carpet?'' She all but scoffed, glaring at her wife when she started to laugh.
''Honey, look at the cover.''
''The cover? Why would I-'' A loud gasp burst from her throat, and she asked herself how she hadn't seen it earlier. Hell, Natasha had nearly shoved the magazine in her face and it hadn't clicked. Katya ripped the flimsy magazine from her hands. ''Hey! That's me! Why the hell is my face on this?''
Muffled laughs made Natasha's body shake, a hand loosely draped over her stomach as her shining eyes gazed up at Katya. ''It's for Pride Month.'' She knew all hell was about to break loose, and while that was exactly what she planned, she did prepare for it.
''Okay, I did not give permission for this.'' Katya's expression displayed pure outrage, her own smiling face staring up at her from the glossy paper. ''And this picture is years old! I did not ask to be a lesbian spokesperson for queer rights! Who can I sue? And why are you laughing?''
Anyone would have pissed their pants if the last question was directed at them in the tone Katya had just used, her gaze sharp, but Natasha just found it amusing.
''Page twenty-three,'' was all she said, her eyes continuing to sparkle brighter. It couldn't mean much good.
''Page twenty-three?'' Katya frowned, flipping to that page only to let out another gasp. ''My dating timeline?!'' She exclaimed, finding about six or seven pictures of her with a different 'fling' this magazine accused her of dating.
Now they'd really done it.
And oh, did Natasha find this incredibly entertaining.
''I didn't know you were seeing other people until 2014,'' she mused like the annoying person she was, noting that this timeline indeed ran to 2014, after which it said 'Natasha Romanoff: 2014 - now'. Which was even more disturbing if you considered that the public only got to know her in 2012, during the Battle of New York. They clearly thought she was a serial dater, going through seven people in two years.
''There are guys on here!'' Katya neared hysteria, feeling her stomach twist around. ''Is that Stark?! I'm not one of his side hoes! He's my best friend! And Steve?! Only because he once had his arm around my shoulder at a party?!'' She fake-gagged, a shiver running down her spine. ''I think I'm gonna be nauseous.''
She was very aware she made a scene in public, but people were too busy with themselves to notice it. If they were to look, it was probably because Natasha's loud laughter attracted their attention. Her body shook on that plaid like it had a seizure, absolutely dying at her wife's unhinged response. ''To be completely honest-''
Katya's hand shot up, successfully cutting off whatever she wanted to say. ''No, shut up, this isn't about you. I'm still processing this. I feel so violated! Maria Hill?!'' Her outburst stopped abruptly when she took a moment to think about that one, shrugging. ''No, okay, I get that one. But I don't remember these other people! They are totally randoms! I don't even like blondes! And this guy is, like, disgustingly buff. Ew, that's so gross.'' A scoff left her lips. ''They wished I was this scandalous and exciting so they had something to actually dig into, but I've only ever screwed you since 2009.''
Natasha hummed with amusement, folding an arm behind her head. ''I'm so honored you gave up your chance at a scandalous life for me.''
Her tone didn't please Katya at all, and she slowly lowered the magazine to send a nice glare her way. ''You're so annoying.'' Natasha only chuckled, appearing very proud of herself. ''Why did you even buy this?''
''For exactly this reaction. It's even better than I imagined,'' she mused. When she had passed the magazine stand in the supermarket last week and her eye had caught Katya's face, Natasha just knew she had to get this. Mostly for her own amusement, to see her rant about it.
''Well, I'm glad you are enjoying yourself at least.'' Katya stated dryly, shaking her head in disbelief. ''And god, why did they print my face so big? And why is there only an article on my ''dating history'' and not yours?''
Natasha chuckled, closing her eyes and facing the sky. ''Isn't it obvious? You're the favorite.''
Katya went to give her an unamused look, but once her eyes landed on her gorgeous, peaceful wife, the annoyance lessened dramatically. Even in the shade, Natasha's pale skin seemed to be shining, a relaxed smile adorning her lips as the loose or escaped pieces of her long red hair waved in the breeze.
An angel taking a rest.
''I'm not agreeing, but if that is the case, then I'd rather not be the favorite,'' Katya finally replied, embarrassingly late. She quickly let her gaze drift back to the magazine, hoping to be oblivious to Natasha's knowing smirk. Still, she saw the corners of her mouth twitch in the side of her vision.
''I'm telling you, it's the dimples.''
''It's not the dimples.'' Katya repeated. ''And the fact that people now think I dated guys because of this article...'' she shivered theatrically, again. Sorry, but the thought of dating Tony? It was even worse than the simple thought of dating men. First of all, it was Tony, and second of all, he was her best friend!
Natasha chuckled. ''Oh, yes, that's just unacceptable.''
Katya grumbled, pouting angrily. ''You mock me, but we both know you're very glad I prefer the female physique.'' After she said that, she cringed at herself, but it was too late to turn back. And according to the way Natasha opened her eyes and slowly raised an eyebrow, the comment had surprised her and amused her at the same time.
''You mean you like boobs,'' she clarified.
''I tried to be polite, but yes, boobs.''
Natasha hummed playfully, lazily reaching up to wipe a stray hair from her forehead as her smirk grew once more. ''Yes, I'm very glad you prefer to be my roommate in a romantic way.''
The urge to roll up the magazine and slap her with it grew by the second.
With a grumble, Katya rolled her eyes and maneuvered herself onto her stomach. Her spine absolutely loved having the weight taken off like this, cracking in multiple places - she was getting old, after all. ''Why do you never buy this stuff whenever there's gossip on Tony or whatever? I would love to torment him with that.''
''Because he would only laugh at it, whereas you go erratic.'' Tony would rip out the pages and stick them on his fridge for everyone to see, and Katya knew Natasha was right in that, no denying it. The redhead chuckled when she dramatically rolled her eyes again. ''Did you find your brain yet?''
''You mean the brain that scored higher on the SHIELD IQ-test than yours did?'' Katya countered without missing a beat, scanning the pages currently before her completely unbothered. But on the inside, she burned with satisfaction and smugness. That only got stronger when she saw Natasha's face fall in the corner of her eye.
''By two points,'' Natasha corrected her dryly, suddenly not finding the whole thing so funny anymore. Over the course of their relationship, this topic had been brought up by her lovely wife whenever Katya saw fit, purely using it to taunt her.
''It's still two whole points.'' A smirk tugged on Katya's lips as she lazily flipped to another page, slightly having to squint against the bright sky. She knew Natasha must be boiling inside like she was a second ago, before turning the tables around. Oh, how kind they were to each other.
Natasha rolled her eyes and then closed them, facing the sky again. Possibly so she didn't have to see Katya's smug face. ''Whatever.''
''You can have my brain if you want,'' Katya mused, flipping another page and then deciding she lay uncomfortably, turning to her stomach again. Much better.
''I think I'll pass.''
Katya hummed teasingly. ''Maybe you are smarter than they give you credit for.''
''That's called being street-smart. The IQ-test doesn't measure that.''
''Sure, love. Sure.''
Natasha carefully opened an eye - or dared to - and sneakily watched the adorable, proud smile on her wife's lips. It lit up her whole face, the small wrinkles by her eyes shamelessly joining in as she read. She couldn't help but smile along and let out a small chuckle at their antics. "I love you." Her hand clumsily landed on Katya's lower arm, giving it a squeeze.
Pleasantly surprised, Katya looked up, scrambling to place her hand over Natasha's and squeezing it back. "I love you too." She smiled brightly, bringing the redhead's hand up to her lips and kissing its palm. A light blush instantly crept up Natasha's cheeks.
"Really found someone I cannot outsmart."
"I love it when you try, though," Katya teased softly, loving the intimacy of their little bubble they'd created. Usually, they only found these moments of rest while in bed together. So, she closed the magazine, placed her hands on it, and then rested her cheek on her hands, shamelessly staring at those green eyes before her. The rest of the world was on its side, except Natasha's face. "So?"
Natasha chuckled, turning her whole body to face Katya to show that she had her full attention. "What, so?" Her hand reached up to push some baby hairs behind her ear, her shirt rising slightly and the muscles in her arm flexing while the light bounced off her wedding ring, and Katya nearly forgot what she wanted to say.
"I'm checking in on you.'' She nudged her playfully. ''Feels like I haven't had time alone with you lately and I miss you." It was a tad dramatic. They'd just had five whole days of alone time and things weren't that hectic, but there was a distance between them that she didn't like. A date and a serious conversation to catch up, that's what they needed.
"Kat, we-" Natasha's chuckle got stuck in her throat when Katya prevented her from finishing that sentence with, 'spend at least eight hours a day in bed together'.
"Shh, accept how I'm feeling." The brunette glared with a pout.
"So bossy.'' Natasha teased her right back. ''I'm fine, though."
Those were, possibly, the worst two words she could have said; she realized that instantly. Everyone knew people said them when they were the opposite of fine. But before there was time to add a more convincing explanation to that answer, Katya's anxiety already bubbled up.
"Oh, no, the dreaded "I'm fine"." She chuckled, trying to make a joke out of it, but her once humor-filled eyes were no longer joining into her smile. Worst-case scenarios started to itch at her brain. Was Natasha unhappy? Was it her fault? It must be, right? Something she said or did, probably.
Before it could get too bad, Natasha playfully and lightly slapped her cheek a couple times, as if slapping common sense into her. "Kat's anxiety, stop looking into things,'' she scolded her wife's brain like a child, but a great bit of seriousness shone through the humor in her voice. Seriousness Katya, of course, picked up on.
"It's saying it can't help it." She pouted sadly. But Natasha gave up on trying to pretend like this wasn't serious stuff, dropping the playfulness.
"I know, I know." She sighed, her gaze dropping to a small leaf that had fallen onto the picnic plaid right by Katya's elbow. She wasn't mad in the slightest, just saddened that the anxiety had so much power and there was almost nothing she could do to help.
"There is something,'' Katya said softly, her eyebrows pulling towards each other as the worry continued. ''Please, tell me?"
Engaging in anxious thoughts was never advised, but when they didn't discuss Katya's terrible thoughts, she drowned in them. Drowned until she felt like she couldn't breathe. It would be the only thing on her mind all day and night, robbing her of sleep and joy. It was even more dramatic than it sounded.
Natasha chewed on her lip in deep thought, propping herself up on her elbow. Automatically, Katya lifted herself up on her lower arms too, her heart pounding anxiously in her ears. The redhead took way too long to gather her thoughts, and the only reason for that could be that her next words would not be to Katya's liking. Katya started to fiddle with her rings nervously.
"I hate myself for it," Natasha started carefully, frowning at that one leaf like it represented herself, "but I keep waiting for the moment everything comes down on you." Her green irises cautiously peered up, and when Katya didn't react, she continued. "You've been going and going without taking a serious break, and I just... I worry." Almost guilty, she looked, like she had just greatly offended her.
Katya exhaled deeply, gathering her thoughts by dropping her forehead on her fists.
As usual, Natasha had hit dead center. She was right. Absolutely, one hundred percent right, to worry. Because the truth was, Katya's hands had been shaking for days, and her sleep wasn't deep enough, and she did feel more tired than usual and easily irritated. All signs of balancing on the edge of a burnout, and signs she had not hidden well enough apparently.
"Believe it or not, but I've been worried about it too," she spoke into her arms before lifting her head, being met by Natasha's lovingly, concerned expression. "I know it's all been busy, busy, busy. And now with Jordyn here, it's something else to worry about... I know I'm near breaking point again, but what was I supposed to do? Just leave her? I can't do that."
The desperation really surfaced at the end, and before she knew it, a warm hand weaseled its way between her fists, forcing them to relax. Their fingers laced together perfectly, Natasha squeezing her hand a couple times until Katya released the breath she held.
"I know. We'll figure it out. You don't have to do it all alone. Let me carry half the weight with Jordyn too. I can help her like I help you." Natasha's soothing voice had Katya instantly wanting to let all her worries sail away. It was hypnotic. "And the vacation planning, the administrative part of her stay, settling things with her boss and mother, her dorm room... don't worry about it, I'll do all that. You just worry about your well-being, half of Jordyn's, and half of Maya's," she finished with a soft smile, lightly squeezing with her hand again.
But that itch stayed in Katya's brain, a nagging feeling rising in her chest.
"And who worries about you?"
She asked the question already knowing the answer, and Natasha knew that too. Nothing she would say would be a good answer. It's like walking into a trap with her eyes wide open.
"I guess... me?" She said slowly, rushing to stop Katya's spiraling when her face contorted. "Don't go down that path. I know what you're thinking."
But it was too late the moment she had decided to share what bothered her.
"It's just so frustrating." Katya buried her face in her hands with an angry scowl, putting Natasha's hand to the side. "I want to juggle ten balls but I can only do four at a time before everything falls, so you are left to pick up the rest without a choice." She shook her head. "I've been so selfish again, dragging you everywhere for my own benefit. And because of it, I'm letting you down. You shouldn't have to put yourself second all the time for me."
Natasha's fingers pried and prodded at Katya's head and face until she could lift it up and see it. They delicately wrapped around her chin and forced the brunette to look at her. "Hey, you're not selfish. These things come onto our path unexpectedly, yet there's no way we can ignore them. We couldn't leave Jordyn to fate, could we? We couldn't risk missing the opportunity to see your hometown and meet your birth family, could we?" Katya didn't react in any way, but Natasha knew she had her there. "If you hadn't done those things by yourself, I would have dragged you to do them. I'm helping cause I want to help, and I wholeheartedly agreed with your plans before we did them. If I hadn't, I would have said so. I'll find time for myself again, and so will you."
Only when her words died out, did she let go of Katya's chin. Katya didn't move in any way, though, when the sounds surrounding them came flooding in again. Whenever Natasha spoke like this, the rest of the world seemed to fall silent, listening to her wise words. They were perfectly reassuring... for someone who didn't overthink every single thing she did or said.
"I just...'' Katya looked away and clenched her jaw, internally battling herself. ''I don't know if I could ever give you peace."
Abruptly, Natasha pushed herself into a sitting position, bordering on the edge of offended. In fact, her heart hurt, knowing Katya thought she couldn't give her the peaceful life she always wanted. "Honey, who said I wanted that? I wanted you, Maya, a nice house and a cat. And I got that, didn't I? Two cats, even." She teased lightly, but it fell flat. Her hand came to a rest on Katya's back. "I'd rather be busy the rest of my life having that, than find peace all alone, miserable by myself."
Katya pushed herself onto her butt now as well. "Natalia, I'll always be this unstable burden. You'll always have to watch out for breakdowns, and cancel your plans with friends because I'm having an anxiety attack, and put yourself second to make sure I eat.'' Her gaze lowered to her hands. 'Sometimes, I wonder what unstable home I brought Maya into, if she wouldn't have been better off with someone else."
That was the final straw for Natasha, who leaned forward to fish her phone out of her back pocket with anger at Katya's brain running through her blood. She paid no mind to Katya's confused frown when she started tapping on her screen, because it all became clear once she pressed the device into her wife's hands.
"Here."
Katya looked down at it, bringing it slightly closer to her face to study the familiar picture shining on the screen. The confusion had already helped distract her a bit. "What's this?" A dumb question, considering this baby picture of her was considered as holy, but it was more a question of 'what are you up to now?'.
"Look at her and tell her the same things you just told me,'' Natasha ordered, pointing at the screen. ''Tell her she's selfish for helping others, that she's a burden to the people who love her, that the daughter she'll have one day would be better off with someone else.''
But as Katya looked at herself, at the small, innocent little smiling baby, how could she possibly tell her that? She imagined that she was about to go back in time, step right into this picture and tell her the things Natasha ordered her to say. She imagined how heartbroken her younger self would be - assuming she understood.
''You can't say it to her, so why do you say it to yourself? You are her,'' Natasha said softly, which finally made Katya see how badly she talked about herself, how toxic she was to herself. Damn Natasha and her smart psychology tricks forced her to take a step back and look at it from a completely different angle. ''You can't run a marathon with a sprained ankle, so don't expect you can juggle all those ten balls with your bruised brain. It's okay to let others help. I love helping you.''
Slowly, Katya looked up. Besides looking slightly relieved, she also looked so insecure and small that Natasha felt another stab in her heart. ''Are you really not stressed, or mad, or annoyed at me? Even just a tiny bit?''
The most reassuring, loving smile she could summon, Natasha painted on her face. ''I really am not.'' Katya's shoulders deflated slowly. ''And I will tell you something else; I'm quite happy to have Jordyn around. It'll be fun for Maya to spend some time with someone who's not her mom, and it'll give us more time for ourselves. And, it gives you something to focus on.'' Patiently, she watched the woman across from her, but it seemed that her words had worked this time.
Slowly, Katya started to nod, more confidently as the seconds passed. A cautious smile managed to curl on her lips too. She reached for Natasha's hand, immediately finding those calloused fingers between her own. ''Thank you,'' she whispered vulnerably. ''You are the best partner.''
A faint blush crept up on Natasha's cheeks, her hand squeezing Katya's in thanks. She didn't do these things for any reason other than wanting her to be happy, but it was impossible to ignore the slight sense of pride in her own chest whenever she managed to pull Katya out of her doubts. ''If you have thoughts like this again, will you please come and tell me about them? I promise, you're not bothering me.'' Katya nodded. ''Okay. And don't you dare talk about my wife like that again.''
Katya chuckled, using the grip she had on Natasha's hand to pull her forward and into a warm hug. ''I love you.'' The sigh that escaped her mouth once those strong arms wrapped around her was nearly embarrassing, but Natasha's fingers tracing up and down her spine made her forget all about it.
''I love you, too. So much.'' Natasha smiled, her heart full once again. ''Why don't you take a nap once we get home? We can survive an hour of the day without you.''
Reluctantly - but also, they were in public and people were staring - Katya pulled back. But it was okay, because when she did, Natasha saw that that teasing glimmer had returned to her eyes. ''Can you do sixty whole minutes without me?''
''Oh, she has her jokes back.'' Natasha scoffed, rolling her eyes. She spotted something of interest while she did. ''And right on time.''
Katya followed her line of sight to find Maya and Jordyn returning with their cones of ice cream. Again, one skipping happily and one strolling along much more relaxed. They looked so carefree that her anxiety spiked briefly. ''Do I look like I just spent ten minutes hating myself?'' She asked, quickly smoothing down her hair and wiping at her cheeks despite not having cried. And before she knew it, Natasha was kissing her.
There were a couple things in this world which always made her smile, without fault, and getting kissed by her wife - especially when she also cradled her cheeks in her hands - was one of those things.
So, she beamed when Natasha let her go, making her chuckle.
''Not anymore.''
They were still dumbly smiling at each other when the girls reached them. The first thing Maya said wasn't anything concerning their open affection towards each other, but rather the magazine she almost stepped on. Frowning, she looked down to the object at her feet.
"What's this?"
In a lightning-fast motion, Katya picked up the magazine and flung it away. "Nothing." She cursed her voice for rising and making her look not-so-innocent, while Natasha was already on the edge of laughing her lungs out again, pressing her lips together violently.
Unimpressed, Maya raised an eyebrow. "You know I can just go over there and pick it up, right?" And she did so, clumsily holding the thing with one hand while melting ice started to drip on the other. Seeing the cover better did not help with the confusion. "Why is your face on this?'' She asked calmly, before exclaiming disgusted, ''Ew, why is this saying you dated Uncle Tony?!"
Katya scrambled to her feet at the same time Natasha burst out laughing, yanking the cursed magazine from her daughter's hands while her cheeks turned bright red, knowing every person in a fifty-foot radius definitely heard that. "Shh, not so loud!" Even Jordyn smiled amusedly.
"You're a lesbian," Maya said, taking a lick of her ice cream completely unbothered. She had her mom's sassiness and Katya didn't know what to think about taking on her own character sometimes.
"Yes, thank you for reminding me. I forgot," Katya responded dryly, cheeks still burning. While she may have warned Jordyn for this crazy family, she didn't think the blonde had expected this level of chaos.
Maya looked down at the magazine in her mother's hands, taking another lick of her cookie dough ice cream. ''Did you actually date any of those people?''
''Of course not!''
The chaos certainly did not end there. Maya kept bothering her about the magazine until Katya threatened to throw her ice cream in the nearest pond if she didn't shut up. And there were a fair few of them in Central Park. She swore she was going to set fire to that magazine once they got home, use it for the fireplace in the winter. It didn't help that Natasha didn't side with her either, that dumb grin on her face the whole time she drove home. Katya grumbled and sank down into the leather seat, staring out the side window with a pout.
As a way of making it up to her - as if that would fix it so easily - Natasha offered to cook dinner, which Katya allowed. She was seriously drained and sat on a dining table chair in silence the entire time, scrolling through her phone. Jordyn disappeared into the guest bedroom, which they renamed as her room, to unpack her stuff, refusing any help. And Maya sulked because she lost her friend to talk to, grabbing her Nintendo Switch and continuing to build her stupid island.
Dinner included a surprisingly good oven dish Katya had never seen Natasha make before, with potato slices, peas, mushrooms, broccoli and small cubes of ham, covered with cheese and mixed with some kind of white sauce. The four of them ate dinner together like it was the most normal thing in the world. Jordyn felt hesitant to take the second serving Katya saw she wanted, but eventually dared to after Maya did it first. There wasn't much talking, but Natasha had thought ahead and left the radio on softly to eliminate a possibly awkward silence.
When her stomach was full, Katya cleaned up dinner together with Jordyn - who didn't budge when she said it wasn't necessary to help - and then excused herself upstairs for some me-time. She lay down in bed with no intention of doing anything else, but soon found that much-needed sleep consumed her, her belly warm with food.
Natasha checked in on her after an hour to make sure she hadn't found herself in another downward spiral, climbing the stairs lazily. A stripe of light fell into the otherwise half-dark bedroom when she opened the door; it stretched from her feet to one of Katya's hands that lay by her side. It wasn't much, but enough to reveal that her wife had passed out peacefully, her even breaths interrupting the silence.
An adoring, warm smile grew on her lips as she watched her shamelessly, happy she managed to grab some rest. It is a lot harder to be mentally strong when someone is tired. And besides, Katya just looked so damn cute like this, so relaxed and carefree. Staring for long wasn't in the cards, unfortunately, as the brunette would wake when she felt she was being watched.
Softly, Natasha closed the door and tiptoed to the door directly across from theirs, knocking a couple times. Intently, she listened for the 'come in', which never came. She knocked again, harder this time, thinking maybe Jordyn had fallen asleep too. But she swore she heard shuffling before.
''Can I come in?'' She asked for good measure, thinking maybe Jordyn didn't realize the knocking came from the door.
But the surprised, rushed answer she got from the other side of the door made her realize that nobody had ever asked the woman permission before stepping into her room. Jordyn had no idea Natasha would be waiting on an answer before doing anything, used to people just storming in whenever they pleased.
''Oh! Sure!''
Natasha found her sitting on the edge of the bed, which was pushed sideways against the wall on the right-hand side. Their house wasn't the biggest, meaning this guest bedroom wasn't the biggest either. It was comfortably sized, yes, but it left no room for a double bed.
The open bags and her black suitcase lay on the ground around the blonde's feet, small piles of clothes on the bed covers and floor as she tried to organize everything. The doors of the wooden closet were open too, and Natasha took a quick peek to see neat stacks and a couple hanging jackets.
Billy had gotten a spot on the windowsill above the small desk beside the closet, soaking up the lowering summer sun. A picture frame adorned the desk too, of what must be Jordyn with one of her friends.
But most noticeable was a black ball of fur licking her paw on the foot end of the bed, lying on top of a couple socks. Liho. Traitor.
Jordyn looked up at Natasha expectantly, silently asking what she wanted, so the redhead gave her a smile to ease her nerves. ''Just checking in while Kat takes a nap,'' she explained her visit, pushing the door nearly closed but leaving a gap to prevent making Jordyn feel trapped.
Her second move was to sit down on the desk chair. It made her at eye-level so she didn't tower over Jordyn, but prevented her from sitting too close by choosing the bed to sit on. Despite it all, the girl still looked tense.
''Can you find everything? It looks more homey already.''
It may sound odd, but Natasha tried to move and talk as mundanely as possible, scrap all the calculating and intimidating parts of her lingering spy-persona. She wasn't the warmest person around strangers per se, but she needed to skip ahead three stages of comfort to make Jordyn warm up to her.
Jordyn's gaze dropped to the stuff around her, fiddling with the bundle of fabric in her hands which represented a shirt. ''I think I forgot to bring some things, but I can buy those at the mall later.'' She smiled, shrugging like it wasn't a big deal.
''Well, if you need something, don't be afraid to ask. Whatever it is, we're here to help.''
''Actually, I was wondering if you had an extra toothbrush for me to use tonight,'' she asked sheepishly, her cheeks pink. Of all the things she had forgotten...
Natasha let out a laugh, feeling some odd tension fall off her shoulders too. She desperately needed Jordyn to like her. ''I think we have a package of new ones lying around somewhere. I'll find it for you.''
''Thanks.'' Jordyn chuckled quietly, looking down again, and that's when Natasha realized she moved and wiggled her toes around as an anxious tic. Better not overstay her welcome.
''Also," she started, getting into the actual part of why she had stepped in, "I called your boss and she agreed to be very flexible, so you can pick what shifts you want to work every week, with a max of three. At least temporarily, you know?''
Gatekeeping Jordyn's life was the last thing they wanted to do, but for the sake of her health, her shifts at the coffee shop had to be dialed down. Besides, three days a week at work during the holidays seemed reasonable, right? They'd cover whatever pay she missed because of this "rule".
Jordyn nodded shyly, saying she understood. Natasha could get a hard reading on her though. ''Thank you.''
The redhead furrowed her brows, trying to remember what else she wanted to say. ''Ehm, you can always use the Audi if Kat and I don't need it. Especially for evening shifts that end late, I can imagine you're not comfortable taking the bus. The keys are in the hallway. Just let us know when you're taking it so I don't call the cops thinking it got stolen,'' she chuckled, plucking at some lint on the sweatpants she'd put on when the evening chills set in.
Jordyn's eyebrows rose impossibly high on her forehead in pure surprise, her fiddling stopping at once. ''I can just use it? It's a brand-new car.'' They entrusted her with it without knowing her driving skills or experience?
''It's also a very insured car. I need to have impeccable insurance with a wife who cannot drive." Natasha smiled fondly, imagining the snarky comment she'd get if Katya heard. "Seriously, we don't care if you drive a dent into it or something. We don't really care about material stuff.''
''Is that why there's a bright orange supercar in the garage?'' Jordyn asked skeptically, very nervous about this whole ordeal.
Natasha had to laugh at her sharp observation. ''Cars are Kat's thing. She has a weird obsession with that car that I never got, but it's best not to question it. She gets quite protective of that carrot mobile.'' She smirked when Jordyn chuckled, again knowing she'd get a very nasty glare for that comment. ''Anyway, in case you want to take the bus, there's a stop at the end of the street. Ten minutes of a walk, max.''
''Okay. I got a bus card so that's not a problem.''
''Good. Hmm, did I have more? Oh, right." She leaned back to retrieve a piece of paper from her front pocket, handing it over. "My phone number, in case you can't reach Kat and you need someone."
Jordyn folded the small note open to be met by a series of numbers. Even those in Natasha's handwriting were elegant. "Thanks."
Natasha smiled back. "And I think that's all I have for you today. If you got any questions on anything, about routines or whatever, just ask us or Maya, since you already managed to climb to the first spot on her friend list," she teased.
''Thank you," Jordyn said softly, still staring at the numbers on the note. Her cheeks were pink once more, and she hated it. "I really appreciate everything you do for me.''
How would she ever repay them? She had nothing to give back, only brought unrest into the house. These women clearly already had everything they could ever want, so the only thing she could provide were services. Cleaning, doing laundry, other chores around the house...
''I know you know Kat best, and you trust her the most," Natasha's voice interrupted her pondering, and she looked up to find the redhead in her most vulnerable state yet, "which makes sense because she's amazing - but I hope you know you can always knock on my door as well."
The blush on her cheeks darkened, unsure how to handle all this kindness thrown her way. "I do."
"Okay, good." Natasha let out a breath, relaxing her expression. "Because you come from a place where it's the opposite, but mental health is very important to us." Her gaze fell to her hands, which intertwined with each other. "I don't know if you know this, but Maya's parents died during the Blip. Her family didn't want to take her in, so she ended up in an orphanage for most of her youth. There are days when she misses her parents, and she's still learning to live in society and a normal household again. Whenever she needs a moment, she says she's going to draw with her headphones on, or read, or watch a show, and we know not to disturb her."
While she knew Maya didn't want or need it, Jordyn still felt a wave of pity wash over her. Her mother may suck sometimes, but at least she still had a mother, a family. Maya's cheery and bubbly character was now more admirable, knowing what she'd lost.
"Kat is taking a nap right now because she needs some rest, and I'm not talking physical. She has her own family and trauma issues. You'll have to talk to her about that," Natasha dodged the core of the issue, aware Katya wouldn't appreciate her spilling her issues to everyone. "She fell hard last year, and is still climbing out of it. Some days are harder than others, and I kinda know what she needs by now, but I find her on the dock a lot in her safe space."
Again, Jordyn wasn't aware things had been that bad. She hated when Katya's classes were blown off because she'd had an accident, but that her 'mentor' had been through so much mental pain, she didn't realize. On the other hand, why would Katya have said that she understood, if she hadn't been through the same thing...
Natasha shifted on her chair. Sharing these things wasn't easy, but she needed Jordyn to know that everyone had struggles around here, and that it was nothing they were ashamed of. "As for me... spying comes with a lot of trauma, believe it or not.'' She grimaced. ''If it gets too much, I'm the type of person who needs someone instead of solitude. So I'll find Kat or call my best friend."
As if she sensed that her owner needed cuddles, Liho jumped from the bed and jogged to Natasha's chair, placing her front paws on the seat as a silent plea to be let on her lap. The redhead chuckled and pressed her knees together, patting her thighs as an invitation. Liho jumped up and started purring instantly, letting Natasha gather her into her arms and kiss her head.
"What I'm trying to say, is that if you need a break or a hug, whenever that is, you take it,'' she continued her speech, glancing up at Jordyn from time to time as she stroked Liho's dark fur. ''If you said yes to Monopoly night - which is on Saturday, by the way - but five minutes before it starts, you feel restless or anxious and all you want is to sleep, then take that nap, we all get it. There's no need to feel guilty for putting yourself first. In fact, I encourage it. Maya will get over you missing Monopoly night, but forcing yourself to sit through it does more damage in the end."
Jordyn nodded shyly, feeling her eyes burn with tears. They truly understood her, like Katya said they did. They understood. ''I'll try to remember that.''
''Don't worry, we'll remind you again and again. It'll be a long process, but at least you're not alone this time.'' Natasha smiled up at her gently, the eye contact lingering. Jordyn allowed her to look into her soul, to see how much pain she actually was in behind those sweet smiles she gave the world.
But their vulnerable moment was cut off by a meow, drawing Natasha's attention to the cat on her lap. ''What's wrong?''
A meow.
''You already had dinner, and I saw Maya throwing you pieces of ham when she thought I wasn't looking.''
Another meow, those big green eyes staring into another pair of green ones, impossible to resist.
Natasha sighed defeated. ''Fine, come on then, you can have some treats. Kat's still asleep so we'll be good.''
Liho sprinted off her lap and pushed through the gap in the door, knowing exactly where she had to go once her ears picked up the word 'treats'. Her little paws tapped on the hardwood floor and the stairs audibly, as if nudging her owner to follow her.
Natasha watched her go with a shaking head and decided to take her leave as well, standing from the chair. Better not to overwhelm Jordyn. ''I'll wake up Kat and then I believe Maya wanted to watch a movie downstairs. So, if you want to join...'' she trailed off, leaving the offer to hang in the air.
But Jordyn shyly shook her head, the blush that had finally been going down, rising up her cheeks once more. ''Thanks for the offer, but I think I'm going to watch some Netflix up here,'' she said softly, immediately looking down in fear of seeing a bad reaction.
However, Natasha nearly beamed like a proud mom. What she had told Jordyn a minute ago, the woman already courageously used. ''Okay. Just tell us goodnight if you go to sleep.''
Jordyn released the breath she was holding, managing a small smile. ''I will.'' And when Natasha closed the door behind her, the blonde took another good look around the room.
This would be her home for the summer. And every minute that passed, that thought sounded better and better.
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A/N: that's it for today! Hope you enjoyed :) Again, I have no clue when the next chapter will be out, as I have no ideas for it yet, but I'll keep you updated.