Build's POV
I did it again, I knew better than to think he'd ever see me as something other than a friend. We'd known each other for a long time and it was always the same thing every time we hung out and he was between girls. He'd smooth talk and flirt and my mind would automatically go to all but planning our wedding and then the next thing I knew he'd be in another relationship and I'd just be "Build, his closest friend." I knew Bible didn't mean anything by it, he was irresistible to be around by anyone who'd ever met him. He had one of those magnetic personalities that drew people to him. I knew I'd been staring too long at him and his newest conquest, Anya looked over at me and smiled.
"So Build, tell me everything there is to know about Bible, he likes to keep secrets from me."
I offered her a warm smile and leaned closer towards her, "What is it you'd like to know? I know everything." I peeked at Bible to catch his reaction. It was too subtle and quick for Anya to have noticed but I knew what it meant. It meant he wanted me to play dumb and ignore her questions. I chuckled and glanced back towards her. "There really is nothing to tell when it comes to Bible, what you see is what you get."
"Defend your friend, I get it. Don't worry though he won't be able to hide things from me for long."
Bible just smiled quietly and nodded. He was getting irritated with her already and it wouldn't be long before he either broke up with her or ghosted her. Pity, I kind of liked her spunkiness despite the fact that she was an obstacle between me and him. But who was I kidding, I knew he'd never look at me like that so why bother. We finished our meal and went our separate ways. It wasn't even seconds after I'd walked into my apartment, my phone vibrated letting me know he'd texted me.
"Ugh, why couldn't you just ignore her? She wouldn't leave me alone with all her stupid questions."
"Why don't you just be honest with her and tell her you are a man whore that only wants one thing, get what you want or get turned down and leave it at that?"
"OUCH! That hurts."
"The truth normally does."
"What's wrong with you anyway? You haven't been acting normal for a few weeks now. Did I do something to you?"
"Nothing you need to worry about, I've just had a lot on my mind."
"Dude come on, you've always told me everything."
Well wasn't about to tell him that he's what's been on my mind. Tomorrow was day one of me starting to distance myself from him. I was wasting myself away waiting for him. I deserved to find someone who wanted to be with me and not just be my friend.
"Seriously, DUDE, it's nothing. We'll talk tomorrow, I'm tired."
I walked in my bedroom and laid the phone down beside me on the bed. Tears started rolling down my cheeks, I hadn't even realized they'd formed in the first place. I was a mess and I knew tomorrow was going to suck. Bible could always tell when I was off and he wasn't going to let things go until I told him. My screen lit up again and I held it up.
"I'm glad you're in my life Bui. You're one of the most important people to me. I don't know what I'd do without you."
SHIT. Why was he being like this? Tomorrow was really going to fucking suck.
**The Next Day**
"BUI! Over here."
He'd spotted me as soon as I walked into school the next morning, Bible was sitting beside our friends Apo and Mile, eating breakfast like always. They'd only been a couple for a few months so we had to deal with them still being in the honeymoon phase of their relationship. On the other side of the table was our friends Big, Bas and Pol. Apo whispered something to Bible earning him a elbow in the ribs and resulting in Bible blushing. I sat on the other side of Bible and grabbed his breakfast and started helping myself to it.
"Hey, that's mine."
"You mean was." I gave him a cute little smile then slid the bowl back over to him. "Sorry, you can have it back." I really need to remember that we weren't anything other than friends. He gave me a weird look and then slid the bowl back in front of me.
"I was finished anyway, enjoy."
Apo peaked around Bible and gave me a sly grin, "So Build, Bible tells me that Anya didn't even make it past meeting you and he's already given her the boot. What do you think about that?"
I looked at Bible, surprise on my face. "You didn't tell me that last night."
"I don't always tell you everything, besides I could tell she was annoying you too. She was too nosy and was asking me questions I didn't want to answer. She even asked me if we'd ever been in a relationship."
I started choking on the porridge when he said that. Bible gave me a few pats on my back and kept asking if I was alright, I nodded fervently to him and when I was able to regain my composure I couldn't help but yell out, "WHY DID SHE SAY THAT?"
Bible looked around at all the heads that had turned at my outburst "How the hell should I know? I guess it's because she could tell we were close." No keeping your fucking voice down, do you want everyone knowing our business?
I got lost looking into his eyes but was pulled out of my trance when Bas spoke, "As cute as it is watching you two, we all need to head to class before we're late."
I knew I started blushing when he said that and quickly turned to get up and head to my first class. As soon as I got up, Bible grabbed my hand. "Build, do you think we could hang out after school? I have something I need to talk to you about."
My heart all but jumped out of my chest at his touch, I couldn't stop the blush from getting brighter, or the sweat that started forming. "S-s-sure. I took the bus here so I'll just catch a ride with you."
He smiled and rubbed the back of my hand with his thumb before finally releasing it. No sooner than he'd walked away I made a dash for my first class and had barely made it to my seat when the final bell rang. The rest of the day went by in a blur, all I could think about was what he'd possibly want to discuss. We talked so much as it was it couldn't really be anything important, Apo had spilled the beans about Anya, and we weren't in any similar classes so it couldn't be about school. I got in trouble in two separate classes for not paying attention when I was called on. When our last class of the day got out I rushed to the entrance to wait for him. I figured I'd beat him there, his last class was across campus, but he was already there waiting. I paused for a second to admire him, took a couple of deep breaths and walked over to where he was. There was a swarm of people around him like normal, one girl in particular was closest to him and couldn't keep her hands to herself. I couldn't remember her name but knew she was a grade under us. She was a very pretty girl and looked like she'd never spent a minute of her life doing anything hard.
"Bible, is it true your dad is one of the biggest businessmen in Bangkok right now and is working on an international deal with America? I'd love to hear all about, my dad is quite well known in the business world and I'm sure he'd love to do business with your dad."
"That's great, I'm not really into what my dad does. That's why I'm studying Engineering." Bible noticed me standing among the crowd and walked through everyone to get to me. "Hey Bui, you ready to leave?"
Everyone was staring at us. What was wrong with him? He'd never ignored a girl to talk to me. I know the expression on my face was one of embarrassment and shock. "Yeah, I guess. Don't you want to finish talking to your friends?"
"No, I'm ready to leave." He turned to everyone standing around him, "Bye everyone, see you all later." He grabbed my hand and started heading towards his car.
"Bibs, that was kind of rude. She obviously likes you and wants to know about you and your family. You could have at least gotten her number so you could text each other."
"Seriously?" We'd stopped in front of his car and had a stern look on his face.
"What?"
"Ugh, nothing, just get in the car."
"No, not until you tell me what's going on with you, you've been acting weird since last night."
"Bui, please just get in the car."
"Maybe you didn't hear me the first time. I said no, not until..."
Before I could finish the sentence I was being picked up and thrown over Bible's shoulder. He walked me the passenger side and all but threw me inside. He buckled me up and then went around and slid into the driver's seat. I crossed my arms and was wearing a pout on my face. I didn't turn to look at him, I just kept facing towards the window when he cranked the car and started heading towards my apartment. Once we got inside, I got comfortable on my couch and just watched as Bible paced back and forth in front of me.
"Would you please either just get it out or sit down, you're making me nervous Bibs."
"I don't know how to start."
"Ok...well just say whatever it is. I'm sure whatever it is I can give you the best advice possible and we can come up with a solution. Is it that girl from school? Is it Anya, I mean I know what Apo said but I didn't know if you were still thinking about her?"
"Its has nothing to do with either of them, it actually has to do with something I've never done before."
"Geez Bible, would you just tell me already. You're driving me crazy."
He finally stopped pacing and sat beside me. He was looking down and grabbed my hands, I tried pulling them away from him, but he just held them tighter. I didn't need him to do this to me again and get my hopes up.
"Bui," he said and looked up into my eyes, I could see tears had started forming. "I'm going to tell you something, but I'm scared of what this will mean for our friendship if I do."
"Bibs, you are really starting to worry me."
He scooted closer to me and reached up to grab my face in his hands. My heart started pounding. Is he about to kiss me? No, that's ridiculous he wouldn't do that. His thumb started stroking my cheek and a tear rolled down his cheek. Instinctively I reached up and wiped it away. I'd always wanted to feel his skin under my fingers like that but had never had the courage to touch him. He closed his eyes at my touch and a small smile started forming on his lips.
"Bui." He oped his eyes and looked deeply into mine. "Why are you my friend? I don't want to hear it's because we've known each other so longer or any of that other bullshit you'll tell me, I want you to tell me the truth."
I was speechless, he'd never asked me anything like this before. But how could I tell him how I felt. He was talking about our friendship being affected. I didn't have anything to lose, I'd already decided I was going to start separating myself from him, this was just going to make things easier if I go ahead and tell him now. I looked back into his eyes and took a deep breath.
"Because, I love how you make me feel. I love who I am when I'm with you, I love that we can talk about anything and everything and still find more things to talk about. I love that when I see you, no matter how badly of a day I'm having I immediately start having a better day. I love that you have a smile for me that you don't give anyone else. But I also hate it when I see you with all those different girls, I hate that they get hugs from you that I want, but mostly I hate who I am when I have to see it and how much it my heart breaks."
Well there it was, I laid it all out for him, my cards were out and now it was time to accept whatever consequences were in store for me. Bible didn't take his eyes off of me or speak for a few minutes. He finally swallowed deeply and pulled me into an embrace. It wasn't quite what I was expecting. Maybe he didn't catch on to what I was saying. Hopefully he just though I meant as a friend. He gently pushed me back from him and started stroking my cheek again.
"That was beautiful Bui, I didn't expect to hear that from you."
"Well it's truly how I feel. You are very special to me and I don't ever want to lose you. But I can't help but be curious about why you asked me that."
"No reason, Anya asking me all those questions just got me thinking and I wanted to find out why my friends are my friends, I asked Apo, Mile, Bas, Big and Pol earlier. Theirs weren't quite as touching as yours but at least now when I meet someone new I can use some of this on them."
I started to see red. Stupid, stupid Build. Once again falling for that face, those words, the touching.
"So you only asked me, so you could get new material to pick up girls?"
"Well, yeah. Why?"
Impulse took over and I slapped him. I regretted it the minute I did it but I was so angry I immediately pushed that feeling aside and just stood up.
"Bible I need you to leave."
He was still so stunned from my slap he didn't move or speak for a second. "What the fuck was that for?"
Oh no, I could feel the tears starting to form, please don't fall in front of him. "Because I didn't tell you all of that for you to use it on girls, I told you because...never mind it doesn't even matter, you're never going to change, and I can't do this anymore. Please just leave."
Bible grabbed my arm and pulled me back down to him, "Bui, what the hell is going on with you. One minute I feel like we're perfectly fine and then the next you start acting all weird and clingy, then you slap me."
"I told you to not worry about it, stop worrying about me, just go find whatever girl will let you in their pants, get what you want, dump them and move on. But I'm not going to keep sitting by and watching you do it. Go find someone else to dump all your emotional issues onto."
Well, so much for not crying in front of him. I could feel the tears falling and I started pulling away from him again to head to the bedroom. He pulled me towards him again but he pulled a little too hard and we were nose to nose. He leaned forward and placed a small kiss on my lips. I pulled back and stood up faster than I ever had in my entire life. He stood up right after me and grabbed me into his arms. My tears started coming out faster and stronger. I pulled my gaze from his, he reached up and turned my face towards his.
"Bui, I'm sorry. I don't mean to hurt you."
"Well you may not mean to, but you do anyway."
"Does this mean we can't be together?"
"What the hell are you talking about Bible? We've never been together, we've always just been friends."
"What if I want the next person to be you?"
I couldn't form words, what was he saying? Was I being delusional again? I'd imagined it so many times maybe I'd finally started losing my mind. I was so distracted by my thoughts I hadn't even realized he'd started leaning in towards me again. His lips were all but touching mine, almost like he was waiting for me to make the next move, I stood there wide eyed and he just smiled and stepped back.
"I guess I should have expected you to react that way, you've always been too scared to make a move, why should now be any different?"
Ok, you asked for it. I slammed my mouth against his, I didn't care about how rough I was being, I let all my walls down and let myself give in to every pent up desire I'd ever had for him. I'd thought he'd push me back, but he grabbed me tighter. I wrapped my arms around his neck and felt one of his hands in my hair and the other on the small of my back. His lips were soft and plump. I felt his tongue run over my lips and I opened my mouth up to him and felt his tongue slip inside. His hand that had been running through my hair came down and encircled the back of my neck, turning my head the way he wanted it to give him better access to my mouth. A small moan escaped my mouth bringing me back to reality and I gently started pushing him back from me. I was glad to see that our kiss had just as much of an affect on him as it had on me.
"That was..."
"A one time thing...I told you I don't have the capacity to waste my time waiting on you."
"So that's it, we share an amazing, passionate kiss and that's it?"
"Yeah that's it."
"Well that may be it for you, but I'm not done with you yet. I lied to you Bui, I didn't want to know why you were my friend to pick up girls. I wanted to know because I needed to know if you felt the same way about me that I did you. I've liked you for a long time but thought you only wanted to be friends so I went out with all those girls to see what kind of reaction I could get out of you. You were really good at hiding how you felt, at first. After a while I started noticing different little things and suspected that our feelings were mutual, but you were just too chicken to act on them. I'm sorry it took me such a long time to be honest with you. I'm sorry for hurting you."
I was in shock, okay, seriously, now I know I'm delusional. Bible wouldn't never say things like this to anyone, especially not to someone he wanted to "date". I couldn't help but start laughing and plopped myself back down on the couch. I felt him sit beside me and looked over to see him staring at me while I was laughing like a maniac.
"Bui, you okay?"
Well since I've already lost my mind I might as well make the most of it, I pulled him to me and started kissing him again. It was so crazy. It felt so real. He even tasted like his favorite gum he always chewed. Spearmint. I was gently laid back on the sofa and I felt the weight of him on top of me. I reached underneath his shirt and ran my hands over his muscular back. I had always imagined how he felt. He did not disappoint, he kept himself in very good shape. Bible was an amazing kisser, he knew what he was doing it and I couldn't help all the moans that escaped from me as he bit, sucked and teased my mouth. This had been my best delusion yet and I was going to savor every bit of it.