Falling back into the routine her and hange had previously had proved rather difficult. It had already been nearly 2 months since Y/N had been disowned by her Father, and so much had happened, with Hange taking on two titans whom they named Sonny and Bean (and trust that Y/N was not happy one bit about it, and constantly checked on them to make sure they were being safe), to Y/N finally catching a glimpse of Eren, since he had been hidden away at the former Headquarters of the Scouts by the Levi squad, and even with Y/N becoming a lead nurse and training the few new nurses they receive every now and again. Once their routine had become established, they both fell into their days quite well.
When the both of them were not practically on top of eachother, it was because they were doing their jobs or simply because they were both so tired. The only break Y/N received during the day had become lunch, where Susanne would cover her so that she could get in some food, before returning to the infirmary until the sun went down and the night shift could cover. Y/N supposed she should be grateful that she was working the day shift, and even that her job included helping those in need. Y/N didn't mind it, so she tried not to complain. After all, her job was nothing compared to the scouts.
She found herself grabbing her food during lunch and walking to sit at the usual table that she did. Hange, Erwin, Levi, Miche and even Nanaba were nowhere to be spotted, as their table sat empty, and so Y/N walked towards it, planning to sit there and reserve their spot, even though nobody would ever sit there.
"Oh Y/N!" Y/N turned her head in the direction of her name, quite shocked honestly. She had become so accustomed to her usual spot alongside Hange that she wasn't sure if the other scouts even knew her name.
"Huh? Oh, Hi-" Was all Y/N could say. She didn't recognize the girl in the faintest, which she supposed was both a good and bad thing, as she hadn't been in the infirmary, but it also meant Y/N had to admit she didn't know who she was. She was short with orange hair and light brown eyes. She looked slightly familiar, but Y/N couldn't remember where she had seen her face. Luckily someone came up from behind the woman, someone that Y/N was able to recognize... "Oh! Oluo, it's nice to see you! How is that cut healing up?"
Oluo Bozado - Y/N clearly remembered him from 2 weeks previously. He had gotten too close to one of his team members while doing an exercise and had cut himself on his right side, not enough to be dangerous, but still enough to where Y/N needed to travel to the former scouts base to patch him up and ensure it did not become infected. It had been the first and only time Y/N had gotten to see Eren Jaeger up close, merely waving at him before being escorted by Hange away from him. He had looked so young, and so determined, It was a face Y/N wouldnt forget anytime soon, that was for sure. How often was it that you got to meet a titan shifter after all-?
She also remembered it because Y/N remembered being so excited to travel up to the old base, where hange had been for the past week. Meaning she would get to see Hange after so long. Right when the carriage arrived and Y/N had barely stepped out of it, she was nearly tackled by them, from them jumping towards her and squishing her into a hug. They had been so happy that she was there- and that made Y/N very happy too.
Then it hit Y/N where she had seen this woman- She had been there the day when she had arrived, and had greeted Y/N and taken her to where Oluo had been since Hange seemed to have a small grudge against the scout. What was her name? ... Her name was Petra!
"It's healing up rather nice actually- No scar or anything. Thanks for patching me up so well." he complimented her, though she could tell it slightly hurt his ego to say so. Y/N didn't mind whether or not he did compliment her though, she just wanted to make sure that all the scouts were safe and cared for.
"Of Course! Just be sure to be careful next time." Y/N smiled at him and nodded
"Don't worry about me- there wont be a next time." Oluo proudly says before Petra added:
"He says that now, but don't be too surprised when he winds up back in your care again Y/N." Petra and Y/N both laughed together, as an angry and embarrassed Oluo tried to stop them.
"You know what- I guess I won't invite you to sit at our table for lunch anymore Y/N." Oluo threatened after Petra and Y/N's laughter had finally died down. He had an angry look on his face, however even Y/N was able to call his bluff, as his team member just stood there looking at him- keeping herself from bursting out into laughter again.
"What are you, a child? Don't worry Y/N, you still have a spot with us at the table. Eren went to go see and eat with his friends so there's an open spot available, only if you want it-"
"Yes! Definitely, It'll be a delight to enjoy lunch with you guys."And so that's how Y/N came into a new type of routine, and became friends with the Levi squad. Well, becoming friends with all of them was just simpler to say, she became close with Petra.
When hange came around however, she noticed Petra acting slightly nicer than usual. Y/N chalked it up to Petra just deeply admiring Hange. Hange was after all a section commander, Not only that, but they were an intelligent person. Y/N could see why Petra was so excited to be around them after all, it must just be a mutual feeling with all scouts.
—
Y/N Found herself becoming more and more desperate for her and Hanges alone time, even coming to their office after she finished her shift, to try and convince them to leave earlier and earlier each time. Y/N was far from a good role model for hange, yet again she never claimed to be good in the first place, and so what Erwin didn't know wouldn't hurt him.
And when Hange did listen to her- When they touched Y/N, even the smallest and faintest of touches, it felt like Y/N was going to combust. Their very breath on her bare skin made her want to tackle them and show them exactly how much she loved them, which she often did.
When it was all done though, Y/N and hange never said a word afterwards. No words of comfort nor about their feelings, just simply holding one another. The silence was just enough for the both of them to convey everything and nothing all at once, and both were content with it. They were both content with the heavy breaths until they died down, with the dampness of each others skin from the activity, with the way Hange always made sure to cover the both of them since they knew Y/N didn't like to sleep on top of the covers, and how Y/N would always rest a bit higher than Hange so that she could hold them while they slept, letting them sleep on her chest.
It was their moment of time together when they could and would forget exactly what they were to each other and simply exist.
—-
However, all good moments are fleeting and never seem to stay within the grasp of those who desire them the most, such as Y/N and hange.
"A mission?" Y/N repeated exactly what hange has just told her, staring at them in shock. She knew this would happen eventually, that was their job as a scout of course, to go out and survey the area, but Y/N felt it was too soon. She had just gotten them back less than 2 weeks ago and now they were to go out into the dangerous areas where titans roamed?
"Don't worry. I'll come back, I promise-" they tried to reassure her, placing their hands on her arms with a small rubbing motion.
"Hange- don't." Y/N took a step back, and Hanges smile fell from their face as they noticed Y/N's serious and stoned demeanor.
"Don't what?" They looked at her confused.
"Don't make promises you can't keep." Y/N remembers the patients she has cared for- has bandaged those who have lost hands, feet, arms, legs, to the titans. And then she remembers those who have died at her hands, bleeding out to death. And she could only imagine how many don't make it back to receive proper medical care within the walls, how their bodies are now decaying without their families or loved ones. She was sure at one point those people had also all made promises to their loved ones about returning, only to end up in the mouth of a monster. "This isn't like Sawney and Bean-"
Hange slightly winced at the mention of their beloved pet titans "-The titans outside are free and will eat you at any chance they get. I don't want you to promise me that you'll come back alive, I know that it's foolish- just promise me you'll try and be as safe as possible." She said and they nodded.
"I promise Y/N- I'll stay focused and safe." They leaned forward to kiss the top of her head, and Y/N closed her eyes enjoying the notion. She knew deep down they would return, however she doesn't want to say anything in case she jinxes it.
"We'll be leaving out of Karanes district, with the mission heading towards that direction... I was hoping you would come with me- just to see me off before we leave." They quickly say, hoping it would slightly ease Y/N's nerves, which they could tell she was nervous for them, as she was tense.
"Of course! Like you even have to ask me... I'll always be there for you Hange, In any way you need." She says. Hange does not address what Y/N's words mean, and neither does Y/N. They stand there in silence, despite the thousands of thoughts in her head. They tell her to kiss hange, to admit she loves them before they leave. To grab them and force them into their bed, making sure to make sure they never leave it unless Y/N is with them. Yea.. that last thought is a little troubling for Y/N and so she lets it go, doesn't do anything but nod and accept whatever answer hange gives her.
What else could she do anyways, except wish the best for them.