After lunch we went back to the class we were just at and sat back down. I noticed that same girl who sits by me pull out the oddest looking object I had seen yet. It was black and had spikes coming out of one side. There was a handle to hold it and a reflective silver lining where the handle part subsided. She then brought the object to the end of her long hair and the spikes ran through. She slowly brought the item higher each time until it reached the top of her head and the spikes still ran through to the end of her hair again. I was fascinated by the process and in this moment there was nothing more I wanted than to try it myself. I saw her place the object back into her holding bag and she asked to use the bathroom. When she walked out of class I reached into the bag of items and retrieved the object I had seen. I held it in my hands studying it for a moment. I wasn't sure what it did but I could tell it had some sort of strange power. I decided to keep it.
A few moments later the bell rang and we returned to the halls. I continued to perceive myself with the hair that I desired. I began to notice more things that I liked. Accessories, ones particularly worn by the girls. They adorned themselves with small, shiny items around the wrists, neck, and in their hair. I enjoyed seeing the light reflect off of the items as they walked past. I approached one to ask where she had retrieved such an item. She mentioned a mall, which was an indoor ground of stores lining both sides of walls. She described how to get there, not far from here. I had to go.
"I want to go to the mall." I told Number 1 and 2 as we walked, still holding the item I retrieved from the girls bag.
"What?" Asked Number 2.
"The mall, it is an enclosed space lined with stores." I explained.
"What are stores?" Asked Number 1.
"Smaller enclosures that have desirable items. You go and retrieve what you like."
"That sounds fun, I want to go too." Said Number 2.
"We will go when it is time to leave here." Number 1 responded.
We left the school and went along the memorized route of how I was told to get there. We approached a large reflective building, this had to be where they hosted the reflective objects. We walked in and there was a wide variety of people both large and small. I noticed a store that seemed to have the most light reflecting off of it, I knew that was where I was supposed to go. I went with the item from school still in my hand and the the two followed. I noticed so many items inside a sort of cardboard and plastic wrapping as I proceeded down the walkway. On the wrapping the identities of them were labeled.
"Hair Spray"
"Hair Clip"
"Hair Dye"
As I traveled further down the line I saw a larger packaging, inside was long hair.
"Clip In Hair Extensions" was labeled under the plastic.
It was beautiful long hair just like I wanted, as if I created the possibility with my recurring thoughts. It was not the color I desired, but it was close. "Platinum Blonde" I read out loud as I examined it. I was not sure how much hair I needed to be as long as the girl's hair I saw so I took the last three packages that were left. "This is what I want." I told Number 1 and Number 2 as I faced them with the shiny packagings of hair.
"Ok." Said Number 2 shrugging his shoulders. Number 1 nodded his head in agreement shrugging his shoulders as well. We began to walk backwards towards the end of the enclosure as I noticed more shiny objects I liked. I picked up everything that stood out to me. As we proceeded to exit the store a loud sound was released from above the door, unlike the sound the walls at the school made.
"Can I help you with something?" Asked the woman who came from behind a counter.
"Yes I want this. I am looking to take it with me." I responded.
"Well I can't let you take it until you pay the money for it." She said. I felt betrayed. Why would I be promised an item and they want something in return?
"I don't know how to pay for it." I responded.
"Well then don't waste my time." She responded. I didn't know time could be wasted.
"You will let me take it." I said as I was sure of my decision. "I want it, it is already mine." I said.
She turned around to face me and we kept eye contact for a few short moments. "Oh, of course. My mistake that is already yours. Please enjoy the rest of your day." She said as she walked back off to the counter.
We then approached another store and repeated the process to obtain new clothes for us since ours became dirty.
We left the mall and proceeded back home. When we got home I immediately changed my clothes and opened the packages. I read the instructions and attached the hair to my head with the clips that were adhered to the fabric on them. They were a part of me now and I loved them, but they were not the color of the moon which made me sad.
"Smooth out with hair brush." I repeated the directions. I looked over and saw my retrieved item from the girl at school. "Hair brush." I said looking at it. I picked it up and mimicked as I saw her do. The experience was even more fun while participating.
The two boys walked back into the house exclaiming "Hey look what we found!" They said carrying in an older television side by side. "It was just on the side of the road." They brought it in and placed it down by where we slept.
"How do you make it work?" Asked Number 2.
"The same way we made the lights work." I said walking over to the black box. I placed my hand on it and told them to do the same. "Now just imagine it working." Electricity began to appear through the glass screen along with black and white moving dots. Number 2 pressed a button on the side of it and a show played.
"Wow it works!" He said pressing another button.
Number 1 looked at me and observed. "Your hair is different." He said.
"Yes, I like this." I responded.
"Oh ok." He responded.
"I like it too." Said Number 2 as he looked over at it and then back to the television screen.
We sat down on the floor and the show that was on depicted fighting and violence. It was a tan man with black hair very similar to Number 2, though their facial features looked nothing alike. His body was athletic and fit with curves in his arms that looked flattering. He kicked and leaped through the air aerodynamically.
"I want a body like his." Said Number 2.
"I want skills like his." Said Number 1. The two boys proceeded in observing the man's actions.
I continued to brush my hair. I loved to feel it, this time it was actually there not just pretending. It was just how I imagined it.
The next day at school people seemed to be jarred by my appearance which I did not understand. People often altered their appearances. We continued to walk until we reached our class. There was a girl next to me in this class as well. She made a subtle sound to catch my attention.
"I like your hair." She whispered when I looked over.
"Me too." I said smiling.
She waited a moment and whispered again.
"Are you trans?" She asked quietly.
"What is that?" I asked.
"Transgender, you know like where you transition from one gender to the other."
"Yes, that." I said. I felt comfort knowing there was a term for it. It made communicating my feelings of the situation easier.
"Cool." She said. "Are you on hormones?" She asked after a moment. I stared and blinked in confusion trying to think up a response. "My cousin is trans, but like the opposite way. He gets his hormones from the clinic downtown. It seems to be going really smoothly for him." She continued at a low volume.
"Downtown." I repeated processing the word.
"Yes just a few blocks up from the left of the school."
"Thank you." I said registering the information.
When we arrived back home I immediately walked over to the mirror as Number 1 and 2 pressed buttons on the television to change shows. I walked up to them announcing "I am transgender now. This is my new form."
Number 1 looked up from the screen. "Ok." He said.
As Number 2 was eating a snack he saved from lunch time he said "Cool."
"Yes." I comfirmed.
After a short moment Number 2 asked "What does that even mean?"
"I think that means a transformation of gender." Number 1 responded turning to him.
"Yes." I comfirmed again. "I like this new form better."
"Ok." Number 1 repeated shrugging his shoulders.
"Cool." Number 2 repeated as he finished eating.
I made my way over to the clinic that the girl in class told me about on my own. I walked through the large doors and asked to see the person who delivers the hormones for transgender.
"Do you have an appointment?" Asked the woman.
"I don't know what that means, I just want the hormones."
"I can't do that I'm sorry, you need to go home and schedule an appointment."
This reminded me of the mall. This person had the ability to give me what I asked for but was choosing not to.
"You can do that, and you will let me see the person who will retrieve the hormones for me."
She stood in a daze for a moment. "Yes of course, my apologies. He is right down this hall."
"Thank you." I said walking down the hall.
"Hello, can I help you?" The Doctor asked looking up from a clipboard.
"Yes I am looking for the hormones to transgender."
"Well for that you would have to go down to the pharmacy next door to here."
"Thank you." I said walking down the hall and exiting the building. I walked next door to the pharmacy. I approached the man behind the counter.
"Hello." He greeted with a smile.
"Hello, I am looking for the hormones to transgender." I told him.
"Do you have a prescription?" He asked.
"No, hormones, not prescription." I corrected him confused by the word he used.
"What is the last name under?" He asked.
"I do not have one yet."
He looked confused and handed me a clipboard of papers with a pen attached. "Sign here." He said.
"Hand to me the hormones for transgender." I said feeling annoyance from repeating myself.
He had a dazed look like the woman before.
"Yes." He said walking over to a shelf behind him. He handed me all of the hormones on the shelf in different colored boxes.
"Thank you." I said exiting the building.
When I returned home I read the directions and ingested the hormones as directed. "Now I wait." I said to myself.
"What are you doing?" Asked Number 2.
"Eating hormones." I said as I faced him.
"Cool, can I have some too?" He asked.
"No they are for transgender, the man at the pharmacy handed me this many so I think I need them all."
"Oh ok." He responded walking back to the television.
I now had a smaller handheld mirror in which I would hold as I smoothed down my hair. I would use the smaller mirror even if I was by the larger one because it felt more interactive.
I noticed a short show playing on the television presenting a beautiful woman with red lips and long black individual hairs coming from her eyes, I couldn't tell why I found it so appealing. When I saw her have them I wanted them too. Multiple short shows would play in a sequence, making me desire more and more things I did not know existed.
As time went on I continuously added to my collection of possessions, I especially loved anything that twinkled in the light as those were my favorite. It's as if all the things I imagined obtaining were being drawn to me and that's what I chose to believe. It became apparent to me that your perception becomes your reality and according to one of the books I was currently reading this was called manifesting.
I returned to the mall to collect all of the things that I saw and applied or attached them to me as directed. Nails that had colorful, sparkling gemstones adorned to them, eyelashes you adhere to your own to create the desired length, eyeshadow and lipsticks in shimmering hues. I now had everything I liked that I could find there. There was a packaging there labeled "Hair Toner" which held a bottle containing a substance inside, promising to deliver my desired color. I applied that to my old and my new hair as well and it transformed into the color I have been envisioning. Everything looked just how I wanted it to.
After my transformation I learned that nothing will ever be as beautiful as the moon.