I stare at my laptop which is laying on my desk. My palms are tingling, teasing and torturing me. It's tempting me but I know I shouldn't do it. Especially not with Valentin away. He said he's going on a mission and that he will be back soon but I'm already tempted and I doubt he wouldn't let me do it, if he would be here. I don't want to do anything behind his back, especially nothing like this but I'm dying to find out. My curiosity needs to be fed. I need to know.
I haven't touched my laptop since I put it away after the FaceTime call with my father.
It was hurting too much to pick it up and try it again. I wasn't even in the right state of mind to use it for other things like getting help, contacting Max or anything else. It's surprising that Valentin let me keep it. Apparently he trusted me enough to know I wouldn't do anything like this and he was right. He knew better. He knew me better than I knew myself. Back then I wasn't sure, if I wanted to stay but now I know that I'm not going anywhere. I don't want to go anywhere. This is my place. Whatever Valentin and I are right now, we are my reason to stay. My main reason at least. The other one would be that I don't want to go back home and live at the same place as my dad. I can't see him right now... but I want to.
Valentin won't forgive me, if I call him. If I do anything behind his back. Especially something that could put him in danger. It may be because I'm so obedient but I don't like doing things without telling him.
I open the laptop.
I hate myself.
Valentin will hate me.
I open FaceTime and want to look away as I see my pathetic face on the screen. I'm still a child who won't learn. I run after those who push me away and don't want me and then get upset when the expected outcome happens. I'm embarrassing enough to beg to be loved. Tears build but I keep them at bay because I don't want him to see me cry again. Even if I'm still a child, I'm stronger now. I can have this conversation without crying my eyes out or looking all dead and exhausted. At least that's what I'm thinking now. That almost changes when it starts ringing.
Come on.
The wall I built can't tremble now. It can't fall.
Come on.
Answer.
It rings and rings but he doesn't answer. My breathing goes faster. I'm getting impatient. He's not answering. He will never answer.
I slam the laptop shut and cover my eyes with my palms.
Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry.
I take a deep, shaky breath and hold it until I'm sure I won't cry when I take my hands off.
Maybe he's sleeping. It's late in the night anyway. But I know my father. He's not sleeping at this time and he always answers his phone calls because of his business, no matter white time it is. He's avoiding me. I don't even dare to think further about it or make an opinion on it because if I do, I fall apart. It tears me apart. I hate being the one with daddy issues. I hate this all. I don't want this to hurt so much. Why can't I just accept it?
Why can't I be like other girls and just enjoy staying with a handsome, mysterious man who gives me everything I ask for? Why do I need more?
Valentin would slaughter me if he would find out about this and he would have every right to do so. I broke my own heart again by not listening to him. He didn't give me any rules but I know he would've told me to not do this. He is rational and mature. Not like me. I don't get it, even if you brutally shove it in my head. I feel so dumb for trying and I hate myself for it. What did I hope was going to happen? What did I plan to say to him? Nothing. I just hoped for a miracle change. Stupid.
I hit my palm against my head over and over again.
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
I forget about all of it for a second when I hear noises. Footsteps. Valentin's footsteps. I know them by heart by now. They're fast and hard. I rush to the door and open as my heartbeat picks up the pace and the floor beneath me vibrates. Maybe I shouldn't run like a dog whenever I hear him come but I don't care. I will not wait for him to come to my room. I will see him right now because I want to see him and as I do, I realize that something is wrong. I'm standing at the railing and looking down. He's walking towards the living room with fast steps but he looks up at me before he enters. He halts for a moment. His eyes and facial expression darken. The corners of his eyes are red and sharp. He looks at me like I'm the reason for all the bad things that have ever happened to him in his entire life.
Then he quickly looks away and enters the living room. I shiver. It was so dark and mean, it shot me right in my heart. Why did he look at me like that? Or better. Or worse. Why couldn't he look at me?
Something on the floor catches my attention.
Blood. There's blood. Each step of left a blood stain on the polished floor.
My heart starts racing.
What happened?
It must be something awful. Whatever happened made him lose his mind because whenever he walks in like this, bringing blood with him, I just know things went awful. I don't know for which side and what he has done but I don't need to know, to know that he's not in a good mood. Asking him about his jobs and his missions doesn't seem right to me so I stay out of it, especially since I don't want to get involved but I need to know what happened and why he's bleeding. Why he looked at me and gave me a death stare. Why he didn't mind me at all. I don't expect him to come to me when he's not done with his job but that stare wasn't normal. It was personal.
As I'm halfway down the stairs, a man enters. An old man with glasses, a long coat and a briefcase. He's following Valentin with fast steps and as I reach the end of the stairs, Cesare enters as well and shoots me a glance before he enters the living room as well. He apologized with his eyes. Probably for Valentin because he knows that something is wrong and for himself because he doesn't have the time to speak to me.
My eyebrows nosedive and I run to the living room but Cesare catches me before he closes the doors. "Baby, I'm sorry but you need to let the men handle this." He's trying to comfort me. I can hear it in his soft voice but I'm not comforted at all when I see Valentin bleeding. I can see under Cesare's arm which is reached out for the door. Now I understand why they all were rushing so much. Valentin is injured. He is sitting on the sofa and the old man is a doctor. I can see how he is pulling his stuff out of his briefcase. He pulls out whatever he needs to patch up the wound at Valentin's shoulder.
I look into Cesare's eyes, as tears are building in mine again. My hands get shaky and I put them on his chest to shove him out of the way and get in but he doesn't let me. He's standing in front of me like steel, not letting me pass.
"What happened to him?" my voice is shaking and giving away how concerned I am. He is hurt and angry and I want to be with him. I want to be by his side and know that he is okay. They can't just close the doors for me and expect me to wait out here. It's unfair and rude.
"Cesare, please!" I beg because he won't let me through. "Baby, he's okay." He puts a hand on my waist and looks into my eyes, making sure I'm looking into his. He's trying to sooth me with his words and his voice and block my view at the same time but he knows very well it won't work. I don't want to lose Valentin and even if this "little" injury won't kill him, I need to know what happened and if he will be fine soon. I want to know what made him so angry. I doubt this is the first time he's getting injured and I'm sure he already got worse injuries but I hate seeing him like this. It's scaring me.
"He obviously isn't." I tell him.
"This is not the first time. We will handle it. Don't worry." He makes sure I believe and understand. I do. I know he will survive it, I just want to be with him but maybe I don't have the right to be by his side right now. Maybe I'm not allowed to go in there and interfere. I'd understand that. Maybe Valentin's death stare earlier was a little warning to keep me in my room.
"Close the fucking door and make sure she stays out!" Valentin shouts from the inside and I freeze in Cesare's hands with our gaze locked. Valentins words hit me like an arrow and my heart pours out sadness that nestles in every inch of my body. It's almost like I can feel my blood go cold when it was burning for him just seconds ago.
I can see the pain and pity in Cesare's eyes. He wishes he could help me but Valentin is the boss. Whatever he says has to be done and he wants me out. He's excluding me from his life and whatever is going on right now. Does he even know how much it hurts? He really can't go back to being an asshole now. Not after everything that happened between us. I can't be just a fuck to him, can I? I pray not. He wants to fuck me but doesn't want me beside him when things get bad? We laugh together but don't cry?
It seems like no matter how close I will get to him, I will never be really close to him. I won't be a part of him or his life.
"He's furious now but he will get himself back together. I promise." Cesare whispers to me before I back off on my own because my body is so stiff, I fall right out of his grip. He backs off as well and closes the doors. I stand there and don't even wince from the loud noise that the slamming doors make. My gaze falls on them. So much is going on behind them right now. On both sides. Everyone has their own drama going on. I just wish I wouldn't be so lonely on my side.
I decide to sit on the ground and lean my back against the wall next to the doors until they're done. They can't stay in there forever and maybe I'll hear some of what's going on inside and can figure out what this all is about. Unfortunately I don't hear much since they seem to whisper, surely on purpose because they know I'm still here and they're lucky I fall asleep because they take longer than expected.
Valentin
I clench my jaw so hard it hurts when Antonio stitches my wound. It doesn't hurt as much as disinfecting it but it hurts like ass too, no matter how careful he is. He has been the doctor of my father and he has been mine, my whole life. He will be until he dies. Until god decides to take him.
Cesare sits on the armrest of the sofa across from us.
"Old motherfucker got you, huh?" He shakes his head and I swallow, trying to not insult him in the worst way in the presence of an elder. Antonio has seen a lot of me but I don't dare disrespect him.
He didn't get me. He just played his cards right and got me distracted for a moment. He didn't get me. I just let my guard fall for a moment and that's not even what I'm so furious about. That's not why I'm clenching my fists so hard that my knuckles turn white and why I'm resisting to speak because I feel like my throat will burn when I open my mouth. I feel like I don't have enough air in my lungs and it will escape when I do open my mouth.
I'm not furious because of what he said or did to me. It's not our little encounter that was just the beginning of the war. Not even seeing him is the issue.
But Anastasia is.
I came back and I knew she was waiting for me at home. I was relieved. Knowing that she was there, ready to take me with whatever I brought to the table, even if it was a fight with her father or the head of him was so comforting and nice to know.
But as soon as I looked at her, all I could see was him.
It was Spencer.
Spencer's blood.
Spencer's face.
Spencer's last name.
I couldn't speak to her or even look at her any longer. It was too much in that moment. So overwhelming. Sometimes I forget the she is his daughter. I felt like I came home to another Spencer, although she is nothing like him. Not at all. Although you'd need a DNA test and birth certificate to make sure she's related to him. It triggered me for a second and that's why I couldn't let her in. I saw how my words destroyed her. How they made her one with the floor, made her heart and her mind collide and pulled on every string of her heart. I hurt just as much as her. It pained me as much as her but I knew I wasn't ready to speak to her or answer her right now. Not like this. Not when I'm still bleeding from the wound her father gave me.
I can't see her face right now.
She did nothing wrong and this all isn't her fault but it's my mind that's playing games. It has nothing to do with her beautiful personality or the way she treats me.
"Did you leave him there?" Cesare asks and I take a deep breath to let Antonio finish his work. "Someone will find him. He won't die. Not yet." I tell him. I can't even think of Spencer right now. I don't care about how I let him bleed there, his wife or what's going to happen next. Suddenly the whole mission doesn't matter to me anymore. All I can think of is Anastasia.
Anastasia.
Anastasia.
Anastasia.
"I'm sure he shit his pants when you didn't tell him here his wife is." Cesare laughs but I'm not in the mood to laugh. I'm pissed, irritated and confused. Lydia, Anastasia's mother is being held hostage by us in a warehouse far away enough for Spencer to not find her easily. I didn't have to get my hands dirty for that but it was my idea and I know Anastasia will hate me for that. She will see me as a cruel monster who tortures her innocent mother but she isn't innocent. Not at all and I know that won't make Anastasia hate me less but I don't care. I told her what I'd do to make her love me.
I hate this all.
I love Anastasia.
But I'm seeing her father inside her.
Usually I don't but something tonight just triggered me.
"I feel like throwing up." I let my head fall back.
"Don't you dare to give up or close your eyes now. We're almost done." Antonio says. I swallow and shake my head. I wouldn't give up. I won't give up.
"I know he made you sick but this was just the beginning." Cesare tells me what I already know. We finally started the war we've been waiting for a whole year. "You need to be ready for whatever strings he will pull." He adds and I laugh. "He won't pull shit. I'll kill his wife, if I have to." I say and mean it. He sighs, letting himself fall on the sofa. Luckily he stays silent for a few minutes so I can put my thoughts in the right order again but then he opens my wound which is almost stitched.
"Anastasia is devastated." He's so quiet, as if she wouldn't be devastated, if I wouldn't hear him say that. I swallow the pain that my heart causes and run my hand down my face. My wound should hurt more than my heart but it doesn't. Seeing her like that pained me. Seeing how she tried to get past Cesare and reach me hurt. How she looked at him when I told him to keep her out. I didn't want to do it but I had to. If she would be here right now, I would be struggling so much more than I already am. I just needed time since I never felt like this before and don't know how to handle it.
She was shattered and I hate it. I hate seeing her like that. I hate doing that to her and I hate that I don't know what I feel.
"Stop acting like you care more about her than I do." I scoff.
"Can't help it when I do." He says and I move to get up in that second and jump him but Antonio presses in my wound and I groan in pain and fall back. "Fuck!" I scream at the stinging pain that makes me dizzy. My eyelids feel heavy. "Give him a cold towel." Antonio tells Cesare. He stands up immediately and grabs one from the table where Antonio laid them out from out of his briefcase.
He places the towel on my forehead and just when he's about to back off again, I grab his wrist and open my eyes, although my eyelids feel as heavy as Cesare's heart will after I break it. His eyes widen as he looks into mine. It's a warning and he knows it.
"You know that she doesn't deserve this." He shakes his head. I clench my jaw. "V, she is not Spencer." His raw voice tells me that this isn't easy for him either. He knows and likes me too well to not do this for me. He's trying to help and comfort me but I can't tell him how worried I actually am about all of this. It's not easy to me. Not at all. "I sometimes forget who she is." I admit and he takes a deep breath. His eyebrows are furrowed now too. "You should stop remembering it." He tells me and I let his hand go, realizing that I'm still grabbing it. I clear my throat and he walks back to the other sofa.
"We're done." Antonio finally says and I take a deep breath. "Son, you need to take care of yourself." He takes off his gloves. "You're like a son to me but I hope to never be called by you again. At least not because of an injury." He starts packing his stuff and I laugh at his comment. "Thank you, Antonio. You know very well that I will call you again." I get up, taking off the towel from my forehead and pat him on his shoulder.
"Lead him outside, Cesare." I say because there's someone else I need to take care off. As well as I know Anastasia, she's in front of the door, waiting.
Anastasia
I wake up in my bed alone and groan loudly when I remember everything that happened last night. I rub my face with my hands and yawn into my pillow.
Of course he tucked me into bed instead of waking me up and talking to me about whatever happened. It's always like this. He just skips it whenever he's not in the mood. He doesn't understand how worried and curious I am since I don't know anything about what's going on. I will make him talk. I know it.
I get up, take a shower and brush my teeth before I change into a short, light pink skirt and a white thumb hole sports top. I can't decide on the shoes so I leave them for now because I'm way too curious about how he is doing. I'm too worried and dying to know what happened and if he is fine now so I just walk out barefoot, totally forgetting about how cold the floors are. My mind is too busy and blurry to think of shoes or socks or doing my hair or even trying to look good. Especially for him. He didn't want me with him last night, I doubt that what I wear or how I look will matter to him right now. His words and behavior last night broke my heart. I don't have the energy to get ready. I need to figure out first if he still has the same opinion from last night.
If he still doesn't want to see me.
My chest is aching when I think about that.
I was laying in your arms. Bare. In my purest form. Why are you pushing me away now?
I shake my head and the thoughts away because I don't want to think of our beautiful moments. It's hurting me more than helping me right now.
Him switching up again was what I was most scared of. Why doesn't he want me with him in his worst moments? He's pushing me away and it's hurting. I need to talk to him and see if he is fine. I have no idea how things will turn out and what I have to expect now.
"Clara!" I shout as she walks past, downstairs. She looks up, finds me and smiles. "Yes, miss Quinn?" She asks. "Where is Valentin?" I ask, almost hesitant because I'm scared that he won't want to see me. I'm almost sure that he doesn't want to see me. Why else would he leave me alone? I'm sick to my stomach. I can't stomach this heartache. The thought of everything between us going downhill now makes me want to throw up. Did his mission bring him down so bad that he started hating me out of nowhere? Or did it have something to do with me? My father maybe. I hope not because I can't even imagine it.
"He's in his office, miss." he's at home and already working. Is he insane? He needs rest.
I swallow the golfball in my throat and clear my throat.
"Thank you." I say as I'm already walking up the stairs.
When I stop in front of his office door, I take a deep breath to collect my thoughts. I don't even know where and how to start or if I even want to start. My mind is just blank.
I finally knock on the door, brave enough to encounter him. Why am I so scared? I wish I wouldn't be so scared of him getting over me.
"Come in." I hear him say from the inside and open the door. He's sitting at his desk, working on some papers. His hair is messy but his clothes are clean and he looks like he won't be leaving the house today. At least something. His squared shoulders and muscles are more defined than they are usually. He would look like nothing happened last night if the dark circles under his eyes wouldn't betray him. I swallow and close the door behind my back. When he sees me he halts for a moment and I get scared. Anxiety creeps up inside me. He puts his papers and the pen in his hand away and as he softens it feels like some of the weight falls off my shoulders. At least a little bit.
I can't move. My bones are frozen. He narrows his eyes on me. Tears are building again and I hate it. He's probably deciding on whether he should kick me out or talk to me. I wish he would think a bit faster because I'm getting nervous, impatient and scared. This silence is torture.
Then I see his lips form a soft smile and feel like I came back to the surface after drawing for way too long.
He backs off a bit with his chair. "Come here." He says. The relief I feel is so strong that the urge to cry gets heavier now but I don't waste a second and run to him immediately. I jump in his arms, bowing down a bit because he's still sitting and when I hear him groan, I back off immediately. My heart drops to my ass. "I'm so sorry. Oh my!" I cover my mouth with my hand, realizing I hurt him but he doesn't let his smile fade. He looks peaceful and fine now. Not like last night. The only thing that's left from last night is his wound.
"I'm sorry, I totally forgot it for a second." I tell him. He nods. I hate it when he is so silent. I'm glad that he is fine and doesn't have a problem with seeing me but there's still something that's bothering him. Of course there is. Nothing is handled yet. Nothing is really fine. The heavy feeling is back and even if it's not as heavy as it was a few seconds ago, it's still there.
"Last night..." I start, not even really knowing where I want to start. Where could I? He takes a deep breath and grabs me by my waist to turn me around and pull me on his lap. I gasp, overwhelmed by his sudden moves but don't bother.
"Sshh." He wraps his arms around my belly and rests his chin on my shoulder. The warmth that blankets my body is making me smile. I'm feeling okay again. He's alright so I'm okay again. There's so much we haven't spoken about but it seems like we don't need to speak about everything. At least not yet. His hug and moves are enough for me right now. The way he's holding me is enough for me because I know it's genuine. I'm happy and so relieved, I can't explain how I feel. All I do is enjoy and savor this moment. The relief that washes over me is overwhelming. I take a deep breath and close my eyes to let it sink in.
"You're barefoot. It's cold." He taunts with his husky voice. I smile. He must be looking down on me right now. I rub my feet together. "Not anymore." I tell him and put my hands on his. He is warm and he is warming me up. That's the only warmth and comfort I need right now. But I'm still curious.
"Does it hurt?" I ask him. He knows very well what I mean but it takes him a while to answer.
"Yes. It hurt me a lot to treat you like that." He suddenly says and I hold my breath, trying to figure out what this makes me feel. I was so scared of everything. Thousands of thoughts and questions went through my head and I felt so lonely but knowing that it wasn't easy for him either makes me feel better. I know he wasn't at his best or himself last night and that's fine. I can understand it. It was just scared.
"Why'd you do it then?" I still ask because I want to know more. I want to know the reason for all of this.
"Because when men handle something, little girls like you have to stay out of it." He whispers into my ear. His warm breath hits my skin and all the hairs on my body stand on end. I inhale quietly and swallow. I can feel a wave of pleasure and excitement wash over my lower abdomen again. As always when he does something like that. "It was nothing personal." He unwraps his arms from me and places his hands on my waist to slide them up and down to my upper waist and my hips. Over and over again, massaging me softly but it's getting more intense with every second. I try to concentrate but my mind is already wandering. Especially because I can feel him getting hard under me.
"So you were just furious?" I'm already breathless but I need to stay strong. I place my hands on the edge of his desk in front of me to hold onto something and support myself.
"Exactly." he whispers, getting harder and I need to bite down on my lower lip to not make any noise that could expose how pleasing and arousing this is. "Why's that?" I ask but he starts planting soft kisses on my neck and I almost forget what I'm talking about. "Not important." His kisses get harder and wetter. I bite my bottom lip harder. "You don't want to talk?" my breathing is so shallow at this point I just can't hide it and I don't feel the need to do that anymore. "No..." he sucks on my neck and my grip on the edge tightens as he pushes my upper body forwards with his upper body. His chest is pressed against my back again and I can feel how I'm dripping.
I understand that he doesn't want to speak right now and while he is putting me in this foggy state of mind, I'm not capable of speaking anyway so I can't argue.
I got addicted to him. To his skin, his scent, the way his hair tickles me, his hands feel on certain parts of me and his voice. I fell in love with all of it.
Will we ever be able to hold hands?
Will he ever love me?
I shake my head at these intrusive thoughts that came out of nowhere and swallow the bad aftertaste they left. I need to concentrate. I want to concentrate. I know that whatever this is, it will never be like a high school romance or anything close to that so I should give up on these thoughts and just enjoy it.
I whimper and whine on his lap when he bites my neck unexpectedly. "Fuck, I love it when you squirm in my hands." He breaths out. I'm so lightheaded right now. I can't believe my office-sex fantasy is coming to life right now. In the best way possible. I love how his hands trail all over my body and how his lips are all over my neck. My heartbeat picks up the pace as he shoves his hands under my sports top and grabs my tits. He starts kneading them hardly as my nipples get hard. I lean into him and roll my hips, waning more. I want to feel more. "I need you inside me." The words roll off my tongue unplanned but I don't regret showing him how much of a desire is burning inside me. It's turning him on even more. I can tell from the way his breathing changes, turns even shallower and how his grasp on my tits gets even harder. If they were made of silicone, I'd be scared he'd pop them.
"Get up." He suddenly demands. I know what he wants. I push myself up enough to give him space to pull down his pants and his boxers. Not fully. Only enough for his cock to be freed comfortably. I arch my back, slightly leaning over his table so he has a good view at what he wants. I can literally hear him swallow. "Isn't that skirt too short, Anastasia?" there's something so dark in his voice, I'm scared I could get lost in it. I'm scared it will consume me. I don't even dare to look into his eyes right now. God knows how they darkened.
"I can see every part of yours. Aren't you ashamed? You walk around like a slut." I feel his hands grab my cheeks so hard that he will leave marks. He makes me shiver by sliding his thumb over both of my holes. It takes me a lot of strength to not squirm again, although I know how much he loves it. I need to stay strong to keep this play going. Unfortunately my wall trembles when he smacks my ass so hard that I dig my nails into his wooden desk. I'm sure I'll leave some marks too. My throbbing clit drives me insane. The need that's building up between my legs makes me lose every piece of self respect that I have. Lust shouldn't turn me into this but it does and I can't control it. Not when it brings so much pleasure.
He pushes my slip aside.
"Sit down, whore."
I blush at his words and the warmth that rolls down in my stomach.
I don't only sit down, I also get filled with his cock as I sit on it.
My lips part and I gasp before I let out a moan. His grip around my waist is tight. He knows that he needs to hold me because otherwise I will fall from him and this chair, from feeling so much pleasure. It makes me lightheaded and good. I feel desired and wanted. It's almost like I need to get laid to get rid of stress. To know that he isn't tired of me. That he wants me. I only hope that it's not the only reason why he wants me.
I look over my shoulder and meet his gaze while he's already fully at it, thrusting and pounding the way he loves doing it but I look away immediately, scared he will see the worry in my eyes. He notices. He slows down and reaches over to grab my chin and make me look back at him again.
"What's wrong?" He asks as I start slowly lifting and lowering myself on him with my hands still on his desk for support. "Nothing." I assure him, hoping I sound convincing enough for him to let it be now. Having the what-are-we-now conversation is the last thing I want now or in the future. I want to see it. I want to be shown and proven. I don't want to have to find out by myself. Maybe I want to be asked. I don't know but right now is not the best time for it. Savoring this moment is all I can think of.
I let out a loud moan as his grip on my waist tightens and bite my lower lip to not let everybody in this house hear me. Although it's kind of thrilling to imagine them watching and hearing us, I'm not sure if that would be fitting for his reputation. It would probably only make it better but we can experiment another time.
He starts thrusting harder and faster and my moans have something porny that I didn't know I like so much. It turns him on only more when I give these noises from myself. I take a look back over my shoulder to him. "You're so big. Filling me so good." I mumble with my puppy face because the pleasure makes me lose all my self respect and I love letting him treat me like this. I love it when he's big, dominating, praising and degrading at the same time. The knot that's building in my lower stomach brings me closer to the orgasm I'm chasing right now and I know he's close too now that I used my words. I can see it in his face that he's losing it. His eyes darken and his lips are parting slightly. I can tell that he is going to moan. I can hear it before he does it and it's giving me so much pleasure that it will take only one last thrust for me to come.
Suddenly someone knocks on the door and we get interrupted. I don't get that last thrust.
I feel so lightheaded that I can't even react fast enough and get off his lap or let go of his desk. My hands are frozen and locked. Maybe I'm just trying to hold myself up because I know I would drop, if I would let go. I can feel him breathing heavily behind me because so am I and he is pulsating inside of me, unmoving. I'm throbbing around him, hugging him tightly as I tense and he inhales sharply at that pleasant feeling. I should do that more often to him.
I try to catch my breath and get off but he digs his fingers into my flesh and whispers "Stay." Into my ear in a way that gives me immense goosebumps. I do what he says. I stay, with him inside me and try to hide the pink that flushes my cheeks. My heart hammers against my chest as the door opens and Cesare walks in with some envelopes in his hands.
"Morning, V! Wanted to che-..." he doesn't finish his sentence when he sees me. I could swear that he is seeing the panic in my face and Valentin probably feels how warm my body gets because of it around his cock. God. Even thinking about that makes me blush. Cesare isn't stupid and he must know what's going on, Guys like him sense it. A warm sweat breaks out in the back of my neck because I don't know what to think about this situation. It's thrilling and exciting but also so strange.
"Baby is here too." He continues and smiles and a ton of weight falls off my shoulders as I realize that he hasn't noticed anything or that even if he did, he at least won't mention it. I try to keep it cool, just like Valentin, who's looking over my shoulder while he's still holding me and slightly moving inside me. I would cry out at the tension and need that built up between my legs if I could. If Cesare wouldn't be here. I was so close to an orgasm and I need it right now. I was chasing it like crazy and now it just keeps running, although I stopped. I try to hide my frustration by leaning into him but I'm sure they both notice how stiff I am. This is crazy. Crazily attractive and hot, yet intimidating and strange.
"What is it?" Valentin growls behind me. I know he's not as mad as he sounds. He might be a little bit because he was so close to an orgasm too but the fact that he told me to stay shows that he finds this just as thrilling as me. He knew he would enjoy this and that makes it even hotter. Would he dare to thrust, while Cesare is here? I would give everything to find that out. Unfortunately I'm too shy right now to tease him or initiate it.
I finally let the table go when Cesare approaches us. My eyes widen more and more with every step her takes because the closer he comes, the more he will see and from where he was standing at the door, nothing was visible. My skirt is draped over our laps and his pants aren't even down to his knees. We should be safe. I hope we are, although I doubt Cesare's reaction would be bad. I think he would enjoy it and make something good out of it but I don't want him to see me like that. Nobody should know I'm fucking the boss. At least not yet. Not until I don't figure out what we really are and where this is going
"I wanted to see how my favorite person is doing. Hope you could get some rest after last night but it seems like you're already all fine." He winks at Valentin and I can see him roll his eyes without even having to turn around to him. I get soft shivers when I hear Cesare speak about it like that. It's obvious that we weren't just talking but I don't know how to find it that he's pointing it out. I can't blame him, though. We're the ones who are pointing it out by not even changing the position when he walked in.
Valentin is still rock hard. I couldn't get up now, even if I wanted to. I wouldn't want to expose him and feel the cold emptiness inside me. He needs to stay inside me right now. That's what I need.
"Some of the infos you wanted." Cesare informs Valentin and puts the envelopes on the desk, right in front go us. Literally in our faces and I'm scared that he can smell how terrified I am. Just like a dog. But I'm glad that he's not paying as much as attention to things as Valentin does most of the times. Just when Cesare is about to back off again Valentin twitches inside of me and I let out a little gasp, pressing my lips together afterwards immediately. They both look at me. Valentin is burning a hole into the side of my face with his eyes while Cesare is raising a brow at my sudden and awkward gasp.
"Everything okay?" He asks, confused, looking up and down at me. I shake my head but answer with "Yes. He just squeezed a bit too hard." I smile, blushing at the embarrassment that I couldn't think of another, better lie but that doesn't matter because he doesn't care and I'm glad that he's not as serious as the other men around Valentin.
"Will this take long? I'm not the one to tell you what to do or how fast but-..." Cesare starts, looking like he's in a rush and now I feel so too because of his comment. There's no doubt they will be busy and we can't finish this. I don't want to occupy him and keep him from his work. "Then shut the fuck up and don't." Valentin interrupts him, getting angrier now. He's impatient, hard and ready. "Come on man, I gotta meet a chick!" Cesare begs, desperately. I almost laugh at how girls are all he thinks about. Flirting and fucking is all he does. It's a miracle that he has enough brain left for work with Valentin.
"God... Okay. Wait downstairs for me. I'll be there in a few." I can feel the body under me vibrate as it speaks and are tempted to look down but don't. Cesare smiles brightly, being happy that he will be in time for his date but I am sad because we will have to end this session. We're not the type of people to have a quickie. It takes a bit longer with us. More passion, time and lust. It can't be rushed or forced.
As soon as Cesare leaves, I release the breath I was holding all the time. With my sigh I feel him inside me again and pout at the orgasm that I let run off.
He plants a kiss on my neck.
"I'll have to handle this. And then I'll fuck you again." Another kiss. I have to smile, although I want to be mad at him and show him that my needs didn't get fulfilled. "If you catch me." I give back. He circles his arms around me again and I fold at his warmth. "You want me to chase you?" He asks with a voice that makes me throb again and he continues because he can feel it too. "You have no chance. I will always be faster than you." He whispers against my skin and I chuckle because it tickles. I feel careless and free. Lightweight. "Valentin, I like this." I turn my head around a bit so my lips meet his. "What?" He asks. There are so many things I could like about this right now. "You staying inside me." I answer and he laughs in a way that gives me goosebumps. He has such a pretty laugh.
"My pretty girl likes cock warming. I promise you, Anastasia. I'll be inside you, every chance I get." He makes me blush again. "But now I need to speak to Cesare." that's my sign to get off him. I do so by slowly lifting myself and getting on my feet. We both can feel how he's sliding out of me, fully covered in my clear, sticky juice and still hard. I leet out a soft moan at the feeling. The coldness that comes afterwards feels awful but I fix my slip and make sure it covers me again while he pulls up his boxers and pants. He places his hands on my hips and makes me turn around so I'm facing him.
I look down at him. One of the rare times where I'm taller than him. He smiles and reaches to squeeze a strand of my hair behind my ear.
"Everything is okay." He assures me, knowing what storms are happening in my heart and my head. He knows I'm still worried, even if I didn't say it out loud.
I smile and nod but take a quick mental note about opening this subject later again.