Listen to this song to feel the chapter
Author Pov
Hazel sighed staring at Cyrus's sleeping face. This stubborn man! He didn't drink the medicine as expected. He simply glared at her and jumped on the bed switching the lights off. She knew it was his indirect no to her that he wouldn't take any medicine.
She placed the medicine beside the bed on the table switching the lamp light on. The yellowish dim light fell over his face making her stare at it for some time. Slowly taking a seat on the bed beside his laying figure she let her eyes soften while watching him.
She has no idea what to feel about him. She still doesn't like him that's the fact and she can't change it after all it's not easy to feel anything for him after all the things he did to her. But now she has admitted the fact that she doesn't hate him. She actually never hated him. She just pities him.
The big bad alpha is actually a broken scared child trapped in the darkness. And he's doing nothing to get out of that darkness. He thinks that her being with him is all he needs but that's not the truth. Her presence can cure him but what if one day she disappeared how will he live then?
The moment she disappeared from his life will be the moment he will again turn back to the vicious darkness he wants to get out of. And she can't let it happen. Whether she stays with him or not she wants him to become a better man. A man who could rely on himself before giving his all to someone else.
She sighed sadly watching him frowning in his sleep. Nightmare. Again. She gently brushed her small fingers in his messed-up hair. She has to admit he has silky hair better than her. She caressed his wrinkled forehead with her thumb making him sigh in sleep.
She felt his left hand moving and she knew he was trying to find her touch. Moving her free hand she softly grabbed him and as expected he instantly intertwined their fingers and cradled her hand in his tightly.
"Cyrus." She whispered feeling him tightening his grip over hers in a hurting manner. She caressed his cheek when he lightly whimpered in his sleep.
"Cyrus, wake up it's just a dream." She leaned closer to his face watching his distressed face covered in sweat. Forgetting about the pain his grip was providing her hand she whispered.
"No one's here to hurt you, Cyrus. Wake up!" Hearing her last two words he snapped his wavered eyes making eye contact with her right away.
Their faces were only an inch away as they stayed silent while gazing at each other. Cyrus's grip loosened but he still didn't let her hand go.
"It's ok. Nothing happened it was just a dream. A bad dream that can never be a reality. It's ok." She whispered against his lips making him slightly blink.
She smiled when he slowly nodded his head. She let out a relieved sigh finding him finally out of the daze and giving her his full attention. She slowly straightened her posture sitting on the bed beside him but didn't pull her hand back.
"You want something." She asked him making him gulp down. He slowly sat up on the bed resting his back against the headboard. He was wearing an undershirt with boxers which were covered with a heavy blanket. His hair was messed up and his eyes were slightly swollen because of lack of sleep. He looked up at her finding her already staring at their joined hands.
He gently pulled her hand near his face looking at it carefully. "Did I hurt you?" Hazel smiled shaking her head.
"I am fine." She mumbled looking at him who was busy inspecting her hand.
"Did it hurt you?" He slowly raised his eyes to hers and he knew the meaning behind her words. The dream. Did it hurt him? Did it?
"Yes." He said it finally he did. He never admitted in front of her how damaging his nightmares have been but tonight for the first time he did.
"But I don't know it wasn't as bad as it used to be." He whispered staring at her who gently smiled at him placing her other hand over their intertwined ones.
"It's a relief then." She watched a small smile appearing over his lips as he indeed weirdly felt relieved after seeing her in front of him.
"Remember you promised me something." He sighed pulling her hand to his eyes and playing with her fingers.
"If you're not gonna fulfill it then I wouldn't too." Cyrus chuckled.
"It's ok if you wouldn't. Because when you were trying to act like my wife I felt like I was with someone I didn't know. I don't want you to act anymore. Just be however you want to be. It's fine to me." He said and she knew he has seen the awkwardness behind her soft actions that day.
"But I am not ok with you breaking your promise." Cyrus stopped playing with her fingers before looking up at her.
He stared into her eyes blankly for some time in silence same goes for Hazel who gazed at him through the dimmed light. His eyes looked unusually scary and dark but weirdly it didn't scare her. While her eyes shimmered with unusual softness yet usual innocence.
"Give me the medicine." His voice made her flicker her eyes in surprise. He raised his eyebrows at her making her pull her hand out of his and grabbed the glass of water and medicines from the side table. And surprisingly he took them in one go drinking them down his throat before placing the glass on the side table.
"Anything else you want me to do." He asked staring at her with his usual cold gaze.
She smiled before nodding her head. Cyrus raised his eyebrows when she pulled her pinkie up making him stare at her finger in confusion. "Come on, join your pinkie with mine." She said with a serious tone making him slightly laugh at her. Hazel frowned at him.
"Why are you laughing? Is my finger funny to you?" He chuckled grabbing her extremely small pinkie with his index and thumb slightly swinging it.
"No, it's small to me." Hazel glared at him groaning in annoyance. She pushed his fingers off hers and motioned him to do as she said. Shaking his head at her childish behavior he wrapped his pinkie which was wider than her thumb and equally long to her index finger making her huff at how small her finger is.
But ignoring it she looked up at him. "Now you have to promise me something." He smiled at her.
"Ok, I promise you." Hazel chuckled.
"How can you promise without hearing what I have to say?" He leaned his upper body closer to her staring deeply into her eyes. His face hover over hers as he leaned his face a little down to come closer to hers.
"You can even ask for my life. I will give it up for you without asking for a reason." Hazel's smile slowly faded away freezing up in her place as she stared into his eyes not able to find any word to say further.
Their fingers stayed joined together as their eyes gazed at each other in pure silence. Something about his words made her stare at him for assurance like she wanted to find how sincere he was in his words and he was indeed sincere. His eyes screamed it openly.
Finally, after a few minutes, she came out of her daze gulping down. She blinked a few times before looking at him.
"Promise me if someday I couldn't be with you, you wouldn't stop living. You wouldn't go back to surviving this life. Live your life even if I am not with you because this life is yours and you should be the one to cherish it the most." Even though Cyrus's mind protested hearing her as he had already made up his mind that no matter what happened she will never leave him but something about her words made his heart shut his mind off.
She didn't say that she will leave him but instead she just wanted him to promise her to not become the monster he used to be if she wouldn't be near him. He knew in her eyes he still hasn't erased the image of a beast he had made but still something in her tone, in her eyes, and her words were different.
"Life is unpredictable Cyrus. We don't know what might happen in the future that's why I want you to understand that I am not the one for whom you have to live. You need to live for yourself." Hazel fell silent as she felt his finger loosening over hers but he didn't pull it back.
Cyrus stared at her for some minutes and he knew the look she gave him. Hazel felt internally sad when she thought that he might pull his finger back but was left surprised when he suddenly tightened his finger over hers once again making her snap her eyes to his.
He smiled. "I promise."
His one whisper was enough to make her smile widely at him. Even though there was something different in his eyes but she was unable to identify it.
They both smiled at each other through the dimmed light of the lamp letting this moment freeze for some time.
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