Responsibilities
Sans' POV
I didn't know that I would have had to come here.
My mother's tomb.
It's...been a few years since I came here. Lots of stuff happened, such as my father's death, me having to do anything I can to give Papyrus a normal life.
I think I know why I came here: I just want to be the one that is taken care of, for once.
"...hi mom" I said as I sat down right on the bench next to the flower. I wonder if I'm actually the only one that knows about this place. And to be honest, I really hope I'm the only one that knows about it. I just realised that this may be my safe space, and I don't want anybody else to find it.
I sighed as I leaned on the back of the bench and closed my eyes.
"mom, are you there? ...heh, who am i asking? of course you're here. you never stopped watching me at all, haven't you?" I spoke.
But as an answer, I received only the soft, slightly cold breeze coming from an adjacent room.
"...heh, you really are here" I added.
Silence then filled the room for a good moment, until I decided to talk. I really couldn't believe that I was about to...vent, how people call it? I'm known around as "sans the comedian" or "comic sans", something like that.
Comedians need to vent too.
"to be honest mom, at first i felt resentment towards you: even if dad was always sweet with me and papyrus, before...his incident...he was always busy trying to search for a way to bring you back. i felt like he had no time for us"
I stopped for a moment, trying to give the invisible woman listening to me time to absorb everything i was saying.
"but then, i think i understood what dad must have felt. i understood it when he disappeared: i too wanted to bring him back, in any way i could. but how could i? i was merely a kid without any knowledge about science, and i quickly gave up hope...
...until i grew up"
I looked beside me, and noticed a slightly transparent feminine figure sitting right next to me.
"...heh, you really are here. if you are here that means that you are focusing on this screen at the moment, am i right?"
I knew about everything. The void, the screens, the pain my parents must have felt...when I became old enough to hold tools in my hands, I quickly scanned around the now repaired Core, and searched for traces of something my dad must have left.
And I found the time machine.
In any case, I could see the woman nodding. Actually, I could even see a sad smile on her face.
I pitied her.
"anyway...the time machine didn't function in that moment, and the only thing i could do now was to simply keep it away from strangers' looks. i put it in the secret lab behind our house in snowdin. but i understood something at least: i can't use the time machine because i am a monster.
i know what you are about to say, that i'm technically half-human and half-monster and that i inherited many things from you, but my soul is the one of a monster, hence...i don't have determination, and that made me...i gave up trying to go back a long time ago. i can't...save and load files, unlike frisk, who is able to do it."
I looked at her again, and she looked like she was deeply focused on what I was saying.
"actually, it quite surprises me that i inherited more things than papyrus from you: i'm the only one with a flashing eye, i'm the only one who loses blood, and most of all, i'm the only one who can see you. funny, isn't it?"
Another deep moment of silence.
"but anyway, back to where we left...the thing that is worrying me now at the moment is dad. i see him in my dreams, and he doesn't look like the man i called "dad". he doesn't look like him at all"
I stopped to see my mother's reaction, and in fact she didn't look happy at all, for what I could see.
"...you two fought, didn't you? ...do you still love him at least?" I asked genuinely curious.
Mum remained in silence for a while, to the point that I was starting to think that she wouldn't answer.
But then, she spoke without my expectations.
"Of course I still love him. How could I ever stop loving him? It's just that...he was visibly scared when we reunited, and...we both weren't thinking clearly. There's not a single day where I don't miss him, and I feel so ashamed for what he has become: the void forces you to see things you don't like, and he...succumbed to darkness. He succumbed to MY darkness"
I listened carefully, and waited for her to finish before I could answer.
"...mom, i need you to help him" I then told her, as she now turned her head to look at me.
"But how? The void has changed him so much to the point that even I don't know how to bring him back to his original status" she said.
"i believe that you can actually do it: the void was created when you shattered across time and space, is it not? you created the void, so there's nothing you can't do to stop your creation. you're like a queen of the void" I said comforting her, and realising that I never speak like this at all. Welp, guess I'm showing my true side
She looked hesitant, but she sighed and nodded in the end.
"How do you want me to help him? And why?" she asked.
And then I prepared myself to confess what I had known ever since one particular dream.
"i need you to stop him: in one dream i saw him, and he was planning to take frisk's soul. as much as i hate reliving the same moments all over again because of frisk, i can't simply stand here and watch dad as he tries to take my friend's soul. he wants to take revenge against all humans"
Mum looked astonished: it looked like she knew nothing about this at all.
"heh heh, perhaps you should have controlled him more"
She looked like she was going through deep thoughts, and ended up groaning and rubbing her eyes.
"What a mess..." she replied
"yeah, totally"
"This wouldn't have happened if he simply listened to what I managed to tell him that day on the phone, back then when you and Papyrus were kids" she added, but when I heard those words I quickly became the confused one.
"you said something that day? dad only heard glitches coming from the phone"
She turned her head in a rush to look at me as if this was the most unbelievable thing she ever heard.
"He didn't hear me telling him to stop searching for me?!"
"uh...no. he heard glitches and right the next moment his scientists called him saying that the anomaly was reaching high levels"
Complex emotions were running now in her almost transparent eyes: this was absolutely not the outcome she expected.
"...god damnit" she spit out.
"pfsh, if dad was here he would tell you to watch your language"
She ended up groaning in exasperation and hid her face in her hands, and that made me want to console her.
"hey mom"
"...yeah?"
"shit"
"Watch your language young man" she told me, and at least it looked like it actually consoled her.
I chuckled and leaned again on the back of the bench and closed my eyes. We remained like that for a while, as only the sound of the nearby water filled the room
"...how much time do you have left by now? i mean, to stay here with me" I asked still with my eyes closed.
She remained silent for a moment before answering, as if she was calculating in her mind.
"...I don't think I have much time left. Staying outside in this form is...consuming. I think I have more or less five minutes left"
I nodded silently as I received that information. I needed to be quick.
"So, where is Frisk now? Depending on their location Gaster might be acting now. If I want to help him I need to be there in time to bring him away from the room I confined him in"
I pondered a moment, trying to recall where Frisk was now.
"they should be near snowdin now. they are probably fighting papyrus now. that reminds me, i need to be there in the sentry to ensure that everything goes well"
She nodded, and looked away: she was about to disappear to be ready. But I still wanted more.
"wait, mom, before you go...can you still sing me that song? the one that you sang when dad..."
She looked at me with a slightly shocked glance, but then she smiled. And it was a motherly smile, one I never received in my life before.
"Of course I can sing you that song. I'll sing it whenever you want"
She cleared her throat and started singing with her soothing voice: not going to lie, I was probably about to fall asleep right there, due to her relaxing voice.
"When the light is running low
And the shadows start to grow
And the places that you know
Seem like fantasy
There's a light inside your soul
That's still shining in the cold
With the truth
The promise in our hearts
Don't forget
I'm with you in the dark"
I closed my eyes and pleasantly sighed: mom first sang this one day, after dad disappeared. She appeared and was there for me, and gave me the strenght to carry on with that song.
When I reopened my eyes, she was no longer there. I smiled, thinking that she was going to solve everything, I was sure of it.
I looked at the flower on her tomb, and felt like it was staring at me.
"what are you looking at? you know that i was never ready for responsibilities"