When a cool breeze slid across my arms, I finally felt the sun. It beamed from above, crisping the top of my head. I wasn't sure when I fell asleep. When I swiveled in my seat, I figured it must have been a while ago. Aches fanned over my back and legs as I uncurled from Wren's passenger seat. Seagulls called out for food in the sky, but the bright blue sea caught my attention.
He brought me to the beach.
I flung out the car, throwing my shoes into the backseat. From the boiling concrete to the warm wooden steps, I pummeled down to the sandy coast. The sun shined differently here. As if the beach was the selling point to keep enduring summer. The heat was thick as the sand wrapped around my feet.
When the sun tucked behind a cloud, I took in the view. The sky and clear water melted together seamlessly. And in the middle was Wren, falling with the crashing waves as his surfboard launched away from him. Popping his head up, he found me instantly. Waving for me to come closer, he dipped back into the water and began to swim.
When I made it to the foot of the ocean, he was on solid ground. Water droplets hung from his lashes as he took his last steps towards me. The surfboard slipped from his hands and melted into the soggy sand. He looked radiant. The sun showed off, highlighting his best features.
"Did you sleep? You must've driven all night." The last thing I remembered was packing. The idea of a road trip outshined Mrs. Davidson's worries. When she realized his friends would be joining us, she let me go.
"I did last night," he said.
"When did you have time to sleep?"
The crowded beach almost upstage his chuckle. Stopping my next question short, he took my hand and weaved through the chaos of occupied spots. His tethered red and black blanket laid right in the middle of the beach. An umbrella was deposited into the sand and hung over a bag of gummy worms, my tablet, and his journal.
"Songbird, it's two in the afternoon." He pushed me onto the blanket and surprise drummed through my veins.
"I overslept!?"
He laughed. "Overslept for what? You got something planned?"
"No...I mean...the day, it's wasted." Digging my feet into the warm sand, I dropped my gaze.
"You're actually on time."
I hadn't fully woken up yet, and he already plotted something. "For what?"
He didn't answer, but he didn't have to. Right on cue, Val's sharp scream exploded at the beach's entrance. Bystanders ogled at her excitement as she zipped past a family of four. Da-Bin was right behind her, and together they carried armfuls of food, nostalgic games, and other beach activities.
Seeing Val made me feel giddy. I launched from my seat and threw her into a hug.
"I'm so happy you're here," I said.
"Me too. After your little allergy disaster at work, Ivy felt bad and let me leave earlier."
"That's...great." The words fumbled between my lips, and I rubbed the back of my neck. Still not over that. I can't believe I got fired on my very first day.
Val rolled her eyes and grabbed my hand. "Girl, it's not even a big deal. Come on."
Darting to the bathroom, she introduced me to three bathing suit options. After I chose the wrong one twice, she sweet-talked me into a two-piece. It wasn't long before we found ourselves on the beach again. She sunbathed, listening to music, I drew. Inspiration struck, and I didn't want to stop.
"Alright, let's go," Wren said.
Peeking over the tablet, I spotted Da-Bin at his side. He tapped on Val's bare leg and she sat up. When I offered Wren a quick glance, he nodded to the ocean.
"You mean into the water? Oh no, I'm not getting my hair wet," I refused.
Wren took the tablet from my grasp. "Nora, you said you wanted to feel the water."
"And I did. On my feet when I was talking to you a few hours ago."
As if on the same wavelength, Wren and Da-Bin looked at Val and she raised her hands. "Don't look at me. I'm not going to convince her. I don't want to get my hair wet either."
Stances were made, bets were on the table, and two opponents got ready for war. With one look, Da-Bin crouched down and Val shot to her feet. "Da-Bin, I'm not playing. You better not—ah!"
Wrapping his hands around her waist, he cradled her kicking and screaming. Within seconds, I lost them in the crowd. And when I heard her shrill scream evaporate into the sea, I knew I'd share the same fate.
"You're going into the water, Songbird. Even if I have to chase you all night." Wren tried to close the gap between us, but I wouldn't see to it.
"Wren, I don't—"
When his hand grazed my arm, I abandoned our spot. My footsteps intertwined with the crowds' as I tried to lose him. He followed me easily, but it wasn't long before I took the upper hand. An army of girls became barricades when they surrounded him.
I plopped through the sand, dodging every obstacle. I nearly ran over three tanned beauties and their improvised photoshoot but powered through. The distance between me and the ocean had grown, and I was determined to keep it that way.
But Wren came out of nowhere when he shot through the line of a popular food truck. Anchoring his power, he pushed himself to close the gap between us once and for all.
Out of time and options, I stumbled into the middle of a volleyball game but didn't falter. It was the moment I almost trampled a dancing four-year-old, I crumbled to the ground. And like a cheetah after its prey, he dove for me.
Hooking his hand into my sides, he didn't even let me squirm. He hoisted me over his shoulder and thundered down the beach. I could feel the ocean water before we even touched it. It rippled against his chest and kissed the tips of my toes. One stride after another. The water and I became better acquainted until he finally let go.
It swallowed me whole, and the world went quiet. The rush of water broke as I bobbed back up. Laughter greeted me in the form of three. Da-Bin, Val, and Wren splashed each other. Fat, chaotic water droplets flung into the air until someone called a truce.
When the water settled, Wren swam closer. "So, how is it?"
"Peaceful."
South Warren was a vacation spot our family had only been to once when I was ten. I took in the scenery. I couldn't believe I shared the same earth with a place as beautiful as this. Water danced in the sun's reflection. Families soaked up the heat of summer. Even the mountains looked like they were sculpted. And at the top, people jumped off cliffs before crashing back into the ocean. Bungee jumpers.
"Val, look!" I croaked, pointing at two people jumping off the ledge.
The loose cord fell along with them before it became taunt. Stretching like an elastic band, they jolted up. The jumpers bounced and swung back and forth until they dangled still. It wasn't long before they parted from the cord and dropped back into the water. A motorboat waded through for them.
"Like Chasing Liberty," I offered, but they tilted their heads. Never mind. "You wanted to do it, right, Val?"
"Of course!" she clapped.
"Wren's afraid of heights," Da-Bin interjected.
Val laughed. "Me and Nora can do it together."
Puffing out his chest, Wren slapped the water with vigor. "Let's do it!"
"R-really?" Da-Bin asked.
I'd never seen them so scared. Now, Val and I were the ones wildin'. My, how the tables have turned. Before Wren could change his mind, we went straight for it.
It wouldn't be easy getting up to that height. After we passed through South Warren's annual community fair and took a gondola lift into the heart of the mountains, we made it to the top. The view was worth it. Tops of trees swayed in the wind. Even the clouds let the sun do its job without interruption.
When the last jumper made it onto the motorboat, the water stilled and got ready for its next taker.
The line to the launching pad was longer than expected, but you couldn't tell by looking at Wren. The boy who could convince anyone they could breathe underwater went quiet at the sight of the cliff. "You gotta distract, somehow," he said.
He looked as if one more step might send him to the back of an ambulance. Instead of telling him everything would be alright, I decided to poke fun at myself. "I looked at my camera roll after I ate those gummies. I can't believe—"
My distraction was shown up by a jumper's yell as they dove for the water.
I physically saw Wren's stomach drop, his face turning a chilling white. "Shit."
It was the last thing he said before he hung his head over the railing and released his breakfast. Hurling his insides, the acidic smell burned my nostrils. Jumpers behind us groaned. They can calm down. People face their fears every day.
As the last of his fear plopped into the ocean, he collapsed onto the ground. Da-Bin was already there with a water bottle in his hands. It wasn't just a fear of heights. He was afraid of falling. He was petrified, and the only reason he was here was because of me.
Crouching down, I rubbed his sweat-drenched back. "You really don't have to go. I can do it alone."
"I've been encouraging you to follow your dreams. What kind of guy would I be not to face my fears in solidarity?"
I wanted to tell him it was okay, and how sweet he was to face his fears for me, but the instructor came up before I got the chance. "How you guys feeling?"
With a weak nod, Wren said, "Never better."
"Think you can make the jump?" The instructor asked.
"Y-yep." Wren wobbled to his feet, and Da-Bin did the same.
Offering a small smile, the instructor patted his back. "Well, you're not going to like this."
He pulled a clipboard from behind and handed out waivers. I practically had to cradle Wren to keep him from falling. The line got shorter, and the closer we got, the more restless Wren became.
"I never asked. Do you have any siblings?" It seemed like a question I should've asked long before now. We talked about me a lot.
He nodded. "Yeah, three sisters. I'm the baby, though."
"So, Val was right. That explains a lot."
"What's that supposed to mean?" he laughed.
I'd successfully distracted him enough to bring some color back into his face. He seemed to have finally noticed the beauty of the view, but it didn't last long. We were next and with the instructor rattling with excitement; I felt it too. It wasn't something I wanted to experience, but now that we were up here, I wanted the memory.
When we were hooked up, Wren wrapped around me so tightly I could barely breathe. As we neared the edge and the instructor counted us down, I realized I was afraid of falling too. What if the cord broke? What if I hated the feeling? Perfect time to get scared, Nora!
My barreling nerves halted my feet, and we stalled. Even the wind had become impatient with us. It passed us by, practically tipping us over. And in a moment of great fear, I'd never felt closer to him. We were connected by the same fear and the same need to continue. A quiet moment fell between us, and without warning, we parted from the ledge and jumped.
We screamed. Our bodies seemed top-heavy as we nosedived towards the water. The rush of the jump matched well with the spiraling wind, but it didn't feel like falling. It didn't feel like flying either. It felt like we were headed straight for death, but knew we wouldn't die.
But there was a moment before the cord went taut, I feared it would give out. And just when doubt crept into my mind, the cord tightened at our weight. Springing us back, we threaded through the wind. When I felt the jolt, it took my breath away, and I finally heard Wren breathe.
"We didn't die," he said.
Laughter funneled through my tight chest as our movement decreased. "We didn't die," I said.
When I heard the motorboat, I unclipped us. We fell into the water, setting ourselves free. I felt like I could conquer anything now, and as I floated back up unscathed, I knew he felt that way too.
The staff member stuck out their hand for me, and then for Wren. I couldn't tell if he had been hit by a truck or seen the face of God, but when his lips stretched into a triumphant smile, I felt peace.
As the motorboat carried us to shore, Da-Bin and Val got ready for their jump. I threw my fists in the air and screamed like a lunatic, but when the boat hit a wave, I fell into Wren's lap.
"You know what this reminds me of?" he asked.
I shook my head, feeling the rush of our jump stir in my belly. "Being on stage?"
"Roses," he said. "When we ended up at the bar where your parents met, and you got me roses, I thought it was fitting. We never would've gone in there if I didn't run out of gas. You know the saying, stop and smell the roses? I thought I would help you slow down and appreciate life. And here you are doing it for me. I guess whenever we're together, we'll always be smelling roses."
Even though part of me felt silly, I was proud of him. I didn't really know who Wren was before I met him, or the person he was before he made it to Elk Rose. But I'd helped him appreciate his life without even trying. I dedicated a big part of my life to helping others, but this time mattered more. We helped each other and didn't have to sacrifice ourselves to do it.
Pressing my lips into his, our sudden kiss caught him off guard. When I tried to pull away, he tugged me closer, and it felt like a perfect feature film ending.
By the time we made it back to the beach, the sun started to set. When Val and Da-Bin made it back, my adrenaline came back around. We re-lived the moment by comparing our experiences. I couldn't wait to tell Nadia what I did. She was going to think I was a superhero.
"Let's grill out when we get to the cabin," Val suggested as we headed to the parking lot.
"Cabin?" The details of our road trip were under wraps. I had no idea where we would go next.
Wren rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah, Da-Bin's family has a cabin out here."
"They...have a cabin? Yeah..." Da-Bin didn't meet my eyes. He looked at Wren, then up at the sky. He was a terrible liar.
I don't even want to know. As night approached, Wren and I lived our drive out loud. Reeling from the jump, we talked over each other. I wanted to do everything because everything was possible. The entire world suddenly looked different. I felt different.
When I felt my phone buzz, I realized I had three missed calls from Shae. I almost laughed. Something happened. The moment I started to enjoy my freedom, it was always something there to bring me back to reality. "Hey, Shae. You called?"
They hesitated, and I almost passed out. "Is it Mom?"
"No," they rushed. "I mean, it is, but not like that." They dropped their voice, and I strained my ears as if I could hear their thoughts. "After you left that day...you know?"
Of course, I did. I tried to forget it. Too bad I heard Zacari screaming, I wanted to kill mom every night when I went to sleep.
"We all talked it over," Shae continued. "Dad said you were right, so we agreed to give Momma until the end of the summer. If her condition got worse, we'd take her...we'd take her off because we don't want her to suffer either."
"Good. Who's idea was this?" My father would've never thought of this on his own. I was surprised he even agreed with me. Why didn't he tell me that, instead of yelling at me?
"She got worse, Nora." Shae's voice broke through my pride like a bullet to glass.
"What?"
"Doctor Simmons's called earlier. She's in a vegetative state."
It was my worst fear. Something about knowing she could sleep, wake, and do everything as if she was fully conscious and not be aware of anything. It was like a simulation. A body without a soul. It wouldn't be her.
But, I didn't feel anger or sadness. Only one thing came to mind. Irony. "It's like she was waiting for you guys to make that decision."
"Funny you'd look at it like that." They laughed, but sounded like their heart was breaking. "Here, I was thinking, she was waiting for you to finally let go."
"How could you look at it like that?"
"She's been holding on because you wouldn't let go. Now that you have, she can too."
I heard them, maybe even understood them, but I didn't believe it. My mother wasn't waiting for me. "I don't know. It seems cruel to think that way."
"Or selfless."
It was a great word to describe our mother, and it made me sad for her. Our poor mother, selfless to the end. She'd given up everything for us, even her peace and comfort. Had she ever experienced anything other than sacrifice? What about her? Her life was going to end without her experiencing anything outside of someone else.
"We won't do anything until you come back home. We want to do this together, so don't rush back. Trust me, we'd love you to take all the time you need. And at least try to have fun, you know, for Momma. She's waited almost three months for you to do it."
🌻Full playlist?
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