*Constance and Amita trapped in the lift*
Constance: I have an idea
Amita: *sighing in relief* Oh thank god! Now we are saved
Constance: let's not get ahead of ourselves
***
*Constance is arrested due to misunderstanding and then released*
Tammy: why did they arrest you?
Constance: *being a typical Millennial* for being so cool
Tammy:
Nine: and she was released because of lack of evidence
***
(A/n: thot = slang for a woman who has multiple sexual relationships)
Amita: what's a Thot?
Nine and Constance: *clearly planning mischief* it's short for thoughtful person
Amita: thanks
*Later that evening at dinner table*
Lou: here's the salt, Amita. It'll taste better
Amita: thank you so much, Lou. You are such a thot
Lou: *spits out water in shock*
***
Debbie: I think Tammy was right
Lou: wow that's... I'm surprised she hasn't marched in here to say 'I told you so'
Debbie: I don't think she'll do it. She fears me.
Tammy: You're right, Debbie. I would never say. For once in your life, you are right, Debbie. I wouldn't say that to you. I wouldn't. I definitely wouldn't.
Lou:
Debbie:
Tammy: *turns around and walks, the back of her shirt having printed wordings 'I told you so' in bold*
***
Amita: *trying a magic trick* pick a card!
Constance: fine
Amita:
Amita: not my credit card, Constance!
***
Debbie: i agree with Tammy
Tammy:
Tammy: that makes me question if i'm even right
***
Tammy: why are you so sassy all the time?
Lou: it's my coping mechanism
Tammy: oh I'm sor-
Lou: I'm coping with how dumb all of you are
***
*Tammy and Tom gets a call from principal to meet. Lou tags along with them*
Principal: *To Tammy & Tom* your daughter was in a fight today
Tammy & Tom: that's terrible, We're sorr-
Lou: did she win?
***
Amita: How do Debbie and Lou get out of the messes they make?
Tammy: they don't. They just make a bigger mess that cancels the first one out
***
*At breakfast, Lou drinks Vodka in her coffee mug*
Tammy: *suspicious, asks Debbie* what's Lou drinking?
Debbie: vodka
Tammy: straight?
Debbie: pretty gay, to be honest
***
*Debbie is at her parents' house for some reason while Lou is in the loft. Debbie dials Lou and they decide to roleplay as highschool lovers*
Debbie: come over
Lou: no. My car has only 3 wheels
Debbie: you have a tricycle?
Lou: you were suppose to say 'but my parents aren't home'
Debbie: I was distracted by your tricycle
Lou: I don't have a tricycle, idiot. The car tyre popped. There are only 3 good tyres. Now start over
Debbie: okay. Once again, here we go. Lou, Come over
Lou: no I can't, my car has only 3 wheels.
Debbie: what colour is your tricycle?
Lou: Fuck you!
***
Constance: I'm pretty sure my soulmate is a bag of gummy worms
Nine: Thats... weird. I just ate a bag of gummy worms and I didn't even like it.
Constance: you fucking piece of shit! That was the love of my life!
***
*Team playing truth or dare*
Constance: you can't turn down a dare
Debbie: you can if you are older than 8
***
Constance: can we get a dog?
Debbie: sure we-
Lou: no we can't. Dogs shed a lot
Constance: we can get the one that doesn't shed much
Lou: nope. No dogs
Constance: but dogs are cute. And I promise I'll take good care of him.
Lou: nope. No dogs allowed in my house
Constance: you scared of dogs?
Debbie: no, she is just worried that the dog might have smoother fur than her hair
***
Nine and Constance: are these brownies special?
Tammy: they are
*Later*
Nine: i don't fell anything
Constance: are you sure there's weed in the brownies?
Tammy: they are special because i made them with love, you idiots
***
Tammy: "i'm sorry" and "my bad" usually mean the same thing
Lou: unless you're at a funeral
***
Tammy: we all just ate our breakfast. Why are you making pancakes?
Lou: they're for the dog
Tammy: why are you making pancakes for the dog?
Lou: he doesn't know how
***
Debbie: I'm sorry
Debbie: *to readers, breaking the fourth wall* I'm not sorry
***
Constance: how do i take revenge on my enemies?
Tammy: you don't need to, you just have to forgive and let go-
Constance: Lou, how do I-
Lou: *throws boxing gloves at her* PUNCH THE SHIT OUT OF THEM!
***
Tammy: don't worry, you've got everything you need to defeat them
Amita: the power to believe in myself?
Tammy: yes. Your optimism and-
Lou: You listen to Tammy and you'll die in their hands, Amita.
Amita: Wha-
Lou: *hands a knife to her* stab them!
***
Lou: *tired of working at her club* I can't anymore. Someone needs to take me out!
Debbie: take you out as in... A date or murder?
Lou: I don't know. Surprise me
***
Lou: I'm in charge of this disaster
Constance: I have a name
***
Debbie: when someone points at my black clothes and asks whose funeral it is, i usually look around the room and i say "i haven't decided it yet"
***
cop: you ran a red light
Daphne: so did you, hypocrite
Cop: i was following you
Daphne: why? are you in love with me or something?
Cop: get out of the car, ma'am
***
*Debbie and Lou prank Tammy in her warehouse. Tammy enquires them and knows it's a lost cause trying to make Debbie confess. So, she turns to Lou*
Tammy: what happened here, Lou?
Lou: I don't know. I have nothing to do with... This
Tammy: Are you lying, Lou?
Lou: well, that depends on how you define lying.
Tammy: what?
Lou: define Lying
Tammy: *irritated* well, I define as not telling the truth. What do you define?
Lou: lying is defined as reclining your body in supine position *smirks*
Tammy:
Lou:
Tammy: I SWEAR TO GOD, LOU! GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE YOU TWO!
Debbie and Lou: absolutely
***
Rose: No, Daphne doesn't have a crush on me
Tammy: yes she does
Lou: she does
Debbie: she does
Amita: she does
Daphne: yes I do
***
Nine: Constance
Constance: what?
Nine: the floor is lava
Constance: *pushes Daphne onto the floor*
***
Lou: Lord of the rings is very personal to me
Everyone but Debbie: aww, it's for all of us. Such an epic
Debbie: Lou isn't talking about epic, guys. It's personal for her because just like Frodo Baggins, her last girlfriend left her for a bearded man and threw the engagement ring on fire.
***