As Nanami talked about the class at school, Ume was thinking about Mizuki. He seemed so strange. He was sad one moment and happy the next. Something was off. He could only be one or the other. Only one half was his real feelings.
"Ume, you alright?" Nanami asked, snapping Ume to reality.
"Yes, I'm fine," she said, "I'm concerned for Mizuki."
"I know," Nanami said, "He has a habit of concealing his feelings. You know the saying 'fake it till you make it?' It seems like he does that when he's upset. When he's angry at Tomoe, he'll throw a sharp barb and show his feelings for him, but then he'll be all happy and come talk to me with a smile on his face."
"I wonder, does he know me?" Ume asked, "Does he recognize me? Did he see me die?"
"I don't know," Nanami said, "I'm sorry I can't help."
"No, no, I'm just thinking out loud."
"Oh. Well, I'll ask Mizuki about it when we get back."
"Don't," Ume said, "I heard him crying. He's hurting far more than I am. I don't remember what happened and maybe if I did, I would be sad, but now, I'm happy. I have no worries. Mizuki is hurting and he needs to come around in his own time. If I try to force him to do anything, he'll hide deeper under his facade to keep himself safe."
Nanami nodded thoughtfully.
"I worry that he'll pretend that his negative feelings don't exist, and he'll keep them inside until they break him."
"How do you want to help him then?" Nanami asked.
"I'll offer to talk to him, but I won't force him," Ume said.
Nanami nodded, "It seems like a weak plan though."
"I don't remember him," Ume said, "I don't know what else to do for him."
Nanami led her into the classroom and let her sit in Tomoe's seat. Ume looked around at the students chatting, laughing, or sitting quietly on their phones. The sound of squealing girls drew her attention as the door slammed open.
"Kurama!" the girls cried.
"Kurama?" Ume repeated, looking at Nanami.
"He's a popstar with a huge ego," Nanami said, "Don't let him get away with being a jerk."
"Okay," Ume said, feeling slightly anxious in the school setting. She wouldn't have been concerned about handling an egotistical or rude person anywhere else, but here in this setting, she felt unexplainably nervous. She was out of her element and she knew it, just by seeing how well Kurama melded into the crowd.
"How are you Nanami? No fox in sight. Who is this?" Kurama asked as he approached Nanami and Ume.
"This is Ume," Nanami said.
"Hearth and Home God, hmm? Interesting," Kurama said, sitting backwards in his chair to make eyes contact with Ume.
"I am. What are you?" Ume asked.
"I'm a fallen angel," Kurama said.
"Pfft," Nanami laughed, "He's a crow tengu."
Kurama shot Nanami a slight glare before turning to Ume, "So what brings you here?"
"I've never been to a school before, so Nanami offered to bring me. I thought it might give me more insight into a young man and young woman's world," Ume said.
"You've never been to school?" Kurama asked, "Why is that? How old are you?"
"That's rude Kurama," Nanami said.
"I recall you asking a similar question," Ume said to Nanami, "I'm over five hundred years old."
"Wow," Kurama said, "So you're a full god, not a human god."
"Yes," Ume said, "I was reincarnated as such."
"What was your previous form?"
"Apparently a human that died a very sad, violent death."
Kurama nodded and seemed to suddenly avoid eye contact, "Sorry I asked." He apparently was uncomfortable thinking about death.
"Death is too dark a topic for you?" Ume asked.
"No, I just don't see how you can say it so freely," Kurama said.
"I don't remember my past life much except for unclear fractions I see in my dreams," Ume said, "So I don't mind."
Kurama had nothing to say, so he turned and started talking to a few of his fangirls who had been waiting eagerly for him to finish speaking with Ume.
"You haven't experienced the hard parts of life yet, so you fear them," Ume said softly.
"What?" Kurama asked, glancing at her while he listened to the other girls.
"Death seems far off. Something that happens to others but that you never experience. So you're afraid. You want to pretend it doesn't exist," Ume said, "Am I mistaken?"
Kurama scoffed, "Yes, you are mistaken. I'm not afraid of death. If anything, I could care less."
"What about those that love you?" Ume asked, "Would you want them to mourn your death? Would you want them to miss you and know you caused that pain because you didn't care about your life or death?"
Kurama was silent before saying quickly, "I don't need love. It doesn't matter. I have my fans. That's good enough."
"You crave attention because you know you don't yet have anyone to mourn your death," Ume said softly, putting a hand gently on his arm, "You want to find a way to ensure that you live because you haven't found hearts to live on in yet."
Kurama's shoulders sank, but he suddenly turned sharply away and faced the front of the classroom.
"If you want to live on in people's hearts, be something to remember," Ume said, "Do things that make you truly memorable. I remember a very old friend, even if it's blurry, because he was remarkable. When I see him in my dreams, he is a beautiful glowing aura. Will you glow in other's dreams, or are you one that fades?"
"How am I supposed to be something to remember?" Kurama whispered, "My face is everywhere and everyone knows my name. What else could I need?"
"Love," Ume said, "If you can make someone love you, you'll live on in their heart."
"How would I know I loved someone?" Kurama whispered, then inhaled sharpy as though he wanted to pulled the question back into his mouth.
"Does someone have your interest?" Ume asked.
"No," Kurama said sharply, "Just tell me."
"She'll be the most beautiful thing to you in every way, even in ways you can't explain. Her words mean more to you than anyone else's. Everything she does is perfect and you can't picture a world where she isn't there to smile at you or say something sweet that you love to hear."
Kurama went silent before a small smile tugged at the corners of his lips. His phone buzzed and he lifted it and answered.
"Yeah, I'll be there," he said before hanging up and turning to Ume and Nanami, "See you later girls. And next time, keep the sappy stuff to a minimum."
He gave a cocky grin and waved as he walked away.
"He's got a night and day mood too," Nanami sighed.
"Some believe it is easier to hide their true pain and they do it for many reasons; to stop feeling the pain, because they believe they are weak if they feel pain, or if they feel helpless to their pain to name a few. If they don't hide the pain, they can be irrational instead, trying to replace the pain with joy or things that make them happy. I've seen it many times in relationships of varying years. The husband or wife will hide their feelings from their spouse and come pray to me, asking for their fears or pain or anger to leave, when they need to talk to their love."
"So what do you think Kurama is doing?" Nanami asked.
"I think he is going to talk to someone who has caught his interest," Ume said.
Nanami groaned and stretched out on her desk, "I'm supposed to be matchmaking. You're going to put me out of a job."
"Not at all," Ume said, "You bring people together and I fix the fights among the people that are together."
"So you think Kurama's already confessed to someone and is dating?" Nanami asked.
"I could realize he was secretly asking for help to understand death. He fears death for some reason and it's regarding his love. Perhaps she is ill and he fears being forgotten if she is gone."
"Oh," Nanami said, "I guess I never pictured Kurama feeling."
"All creatures can feel if they choose to."
The teacher came in and Nanami shared her books with Ume. When lunch came, Ume noticed a cherry blossom tree outside the window that she liked and asked to eat lunch outside. The teacher was influenced by Ume's energy and innocent, kind request and agreed. As Ume and Nanami left, they heard screaming. Ume turned to see everyone rushing into the hallway and went out to see.
"The snake's back!" one of the boys yelled.
"Mizuki," Nanami muttered, "What is he doing here?"
"Mizuki?" Ume whispered, pushing gently through the crowd to see a white snake coiled up and looking around at the crowd. He didn't seem to care that he was caught or possibly in danger. He seemed weak.
"Come here," Ume coaxed softly, kneeling down by the snake and holding out her arm. The snake didn't budge.
"Mizuki, I want to remember you," she said softly so none of the students heard. The snake's head perked up and he hesitantly slithered up to Ume and coiled around her arm. She stroked his head gently as she walked through the classroom to the door that led outside to the tree she wanted to eat under.
"I'll let you talk," Nanami said, smiling and sitting at her desk.
"Thank you," Ume said, walking out the door and sitting under the tree as leaves fell. She let the snake uncoil from her arm onto the ground and looked around before asking him to change back. He shook his head.
"Why not?" she asked.
He coiled up into a pile and looked away from her.
"Did I do something in the past to make you hate me?" Ume asked.
"No!" Mizuki cried suddenly, looking up at her earnestly.
"You can speak in this form?" Ume asked.
Mizuki nodded.
"Why won't you help me remember?" Ume asked.
"You'll hate me," Mizuki said.
"Why do you think that?"
"I let you die," he hide his face in his coils.
"What do you mean?" Ume asked, not believing for a second that the sad, shy snake had abandoned her or done anything cruel.
"I let you leave and you got hurt because I let you go," Mizuki whimpered.
"Do you love me, Mizuki?" she asked.
"Yes and I should've told you then so you wouldn't have left," Mizuki said, "But I wanted you to have your freedom so you could be happy and live a life with the humans."
"I don't need my memories," Ume said, "That was all I needed to know."
"What do you mean?" Mizuki asked.
"I wanted to know who was the man with the beautiful, pure-white aura that I saw in my dreams. I wanted to know why I saw him and why he was important," Ume said, "If it was because I loved him, then that was all I needed to know. Mizuki, I don't need my memories if you'll help me to love you again like I did."
Mizuki's eyes went wide and he looked around before turning back to his human-like yokai form. His eyes were wide and eager and he looked like a young child staring up at her from the ground.
"Do you mean it?" he asked.
"I want to love you the way I used to," Ume said.
Mizuki sat up and he had a genuine, beaming smile on his face.
"I love you!" he said, "And I'll make you love me again!"
He wrapped her in a tight hug and held her there for a little while before loosening his grip and stroking her hair. The long, dark hair that he had once watched grow to her waist and flow like a shimmering river of onyx. He lifted her face and looked at the dark brown eyes that had once needed him so desperately. He felt bad that he would still selfishly keep her memories from her, but one thing he wouldn't regret was that these eyes he stared into weren't lace with the same terror and need they once had been. She no longer had that pain and fear of someone who couldn't trust. She was hopeful, innocent, and beautiful in a way Mizuki had never been able to help her become. He couldn't be more grateful that she could be this way, the way she always should have been.
"Mizuki, why are you crying?" Ume asked, wiping the tears off his cheeks.
"You're so beautiful," Mizuki said, "Please, always smile like you are now."
She smiled brightly and laughed softly. When she looked up to him, she saw the dream she'd had. The way that only the tree and the aura stood out, but it wasn't Yonomori's tree in the dream. It had been this tree, even if it wasn't in bloom, and it had been Mizuki talking to her under this tree that the dream predicted. Mikage had been right. It was a premonition five-hundred years in the making and it had come true.
"Beautiful," Mizuki whispered, pulling her head to his chest and closing his eyes.
She opened her lunch and ate it silently, letting Mizuki hold her closed and listening to his heart. He wasn't pretending and hiding pain. The pain seemed to have truly been erased.
"Mizuki, if I have to smile, then you have to do something for me," Ume said.
"Anything," he said brightly.
"Show me when you're sad, or angry," Ume said, "Don't pretend not to hurt. I couldn't stand watching you destroy yourself. I can already see it will be easy to love you, because my love for you still exists somewhere in my heart and I can feel it when I look at you. The trust I had, how happy I was with you. Don't make me watch you hurt in secret."
"I promise, I'll share everything," Mizuki said, "I'll never keep anything secret from you. Maybe someday, when I'm ready, I'll tell you everything about our past."
"Even if you never tell me, I trust that you are doing what's best."
Mizuki began to wonder if it was what was best. Hiding the past would leave a blank in her mind, but could that space be filled with new memories. What about Lady Yonomori? He would have to tell Ume about her. That was one thing that she would be happy to remember. The plum blossoms! That tree would eternally bloom. She could see it again. She had loved the tree so much.
"I'll take you somewhere special after school," Mizuki said, "Would you like to come?"
"Yes," Ume said.
Mizuki smiled and the bell rang. Ume finished the rest of lunch quickly before running inside.
"Go home and wait for me," Ume said.
"I'd wait for eternity," Mizuki said, smiling and then turning back into a snake and slithering away.