you wanted me too much too much too much
to the point you thought you are going to lose me anyways
its this wretched over focus , the Machiavellian character
i wanted to please you too much too much too much
and look at me making promises i cant keep
its this wretched over thinking , the Azazalean character
i wanted to make all things perfect too much too much too much
to the point where i think about my writing projects
and i keep thinking of writing them
and i keep thinking , oh woe is me who cant get myself to write because
i cant let myself go and experiment
and i keep thinking to finish things but oh i wanted it to be perfect
the over focus being my shackles , binding me blind
what does it mean to let it go?
isn't it to let loose and explore while learning through consequences
but its alright too if i cant learn well
because then again if i go to overfocus on that
would i ever learn?
why is studies something i keep delaying?
why did i overfocus on it to a point im in disdain?
why did i overfocus on not feeling complete?
isnt that why im feeling obsolete?