ISHQ- Love
"Ma'am..." short, concerned voices were reaching my ears. I attempted to open my eyes but soon closed them as a sudden pain reached my head. Why was it paining? I attempted to remind my brain about the latest scenario and suddenly the thought of Yash made me jerk my eyes open.
Numerous unfamiliar faces were staring at me with concern. My eyes searched for anything that could convince me that Yash was fine. Suddenly, the thought compelled my heart to ache in agony. I wasn't letting him leave me too. I wasn't going to allow myself to be heartbroken. It wasn't happening. Faith wasn't going to play games with me. It wasn't going to steal Yash from me. Not him! Not when it hurts so much at the mere thought of never being able to see his gorgeous smile.
"Ma'am, are you okay" same a hesitant voice as the lady from earlier touched my shoulder in concern. They had made me lay down on the couch. I pulled myself from it though they were urging me to have some rest.
"What had happened to Yash?" I inquired not letting my overthinking mind drive me crazy.
"Ma'am... I suggest you rest..." she was trying to doze off the topic but I interrupted her.
"No! Answer me..." I was least bothered if I sounded unprofessional. "What's wrong with him? Why is he not receiving our phone?"
"Nothing is wrong with your Yash." I heard a familiar voice and my eyes strolled in that direction. Abhijeet had a broad smile playing on his lip as he winked in my direction. That mischief was radiating from his orbs. It took a minute for my mind to register his words. The burying hope returned to the surface as I pulled myself from the hard, rough couch.
My legs directed me in his direction. Eyes demanding him to elaborate on the matter. "He isn't in a condition to console you." Those words made a sudden wave of anxiety knock out my spirit. I stumbled on my steps, Abhijeet attempted to reach for me but I maintained my posture.
"What do you mean?" My tone had the fear that made him stare at me with concern.
"He was adamant not to share with you about the condition. Actually... he met with an accident and..." I was already sobbing as he was narrating about the event. My mind was not in a condition to register the logical stuff he was uttering. Flashes of the past kept revolving every second. I was afraid of losing him. I was scared of history repeating itself.
I drew a series of breaths. Held my uneven breath in control. Attempting to not get triggered by the flashes. "Aarohi, are you fine?" His arms were soon wrapped around my shoulder. Those set of mischievous orbs glancing at me with concern.
"I..." It was getting difficult to breathe, to calm down.
"Shh... calm down..." he attempted to comfort me.
"I want to meet him..." I mumbled in between my sobs. He stared at me in concern not voicing a word. "Please..." I could feel him on the verge of denying it.
"But on one condition, you aren't going to panic." His orbs were staring at me with concern as if he was uncertain about his decision. But the way he voiced those words was further driving me into the pool of anxiety. I attempted to assure him that I won't but I could feel it in his orbs that he was confirmed that I would lose my calm, the minute I would glance at Yash.
~~••~~
The entire ride was met with silence. Abhijeet seemed lost in thoughts, contradicting his decision of taking me to Yash. Not able to hold my anxiousness back, I voiced my anxiety. "He is fine? Why hadn't he contacted me for the past few days if he was in the city? Has the accident made severe harm?" A number of questions were jumping into my mind. Why was the situation warning me that it was worse than anticipated?
"I will suggest you keep calm." Abhijeet came with a clear short answer making my anxiety reached its peak.
The minute he parked before a familiar, large building. I followed behind him with rushing steps. Yash was admitted to the famous hospital in the city. How long was he admitted here? And why was I kept hidden from the truth? Each step that took me inside was filled with fear. I was frightened to glimpse something unwanted. To hear a piece of undesirable news. I had met with enough grieving news in my life. I was craving peace, for happiness. The only person who was determined to offer me it. Faith was determined to steal him from me as well.
I wasn't going to allow faith to damage me. I wasn't allowing it to steal Yash from me. Soon, we were walking into the corridors. Numerous faces of pain, and grief were surrounding the building. None ever loved visiting the hospital. The building had a sense of grief associated with it. The walls had witnessed thousands of cries of loved ones. Saw many mothers losing their children. Wife loses their husband, and children lost their parents. This building how often might have passed only bad news. Only grief!
"Dad, how is his condition?" Abhijeet halted in front of a familiar older figure. I had seen him in Yash's office a week before. The person who invited us to his house for dinner. He seemed older compared to the figure I had seen a week earlier. The coat was removed while the sleeves of his white shirt were pulled to the elbow. His orbs showed exhaustion, he seemed much more devasted than Abhijeet.
"They are saying that..." his orbs locked on me. Shock reached into those orbs before he averted his gaze to glance at Abhijeet. "I am glad you brought her." He muttered before offering a smile at me. "You don't need to worry child, he will get better." His own voice was defeating him. He wanted to sound assuring but was dying in concern.
Abhijeet dragged his father a distance away, his eyes having the concern. "Is he fine?" He whispered attempting to not reach it to my ears.
"He had got conscious but there is a tragedy." His whisper was quieter yet due to the silence prevailing around them I could listen to it. "It will be difficult for him to get on his legs, bones are severely injured." Muttered in a despondent voice. My brain wasn't analysing any possibility. My heart wanted to glance at him, it wanted to be assured that he was alive.
"Can I meet him?" I pleaded to interrupt them in their speech. Abhijeet glanced at me with a denying look but before he could voice a word out. His father answered me.
"You can..." he informed pointing at the door. My heart accelerated, my brain fogging with worry as I took step towards the door.
"But dad..." Abhijeet attempted to interrupt but the older figure silenced him.
"She deserves to glance at his state."
"He won't approve of it..."
"World doesn't work on his approval." The older, rough voice countered back. I offered a slight knock on the door before pushing it open. My heart was accelerating under my ribs. The thought of what was waiting for me inside was breaking me into pieces? I wasn't sure if I was prepared but I needed to confirm, my heart that he was fine. He was before my eyes, breathing.
The minute the door was opened, a cold air reached my spirit. There wasn't much brightness but enough for my eyes to glimpse into the surrounding. My eyes soon fixed on the creature laying on the bed. Machines were attached to his body.
The expressive, tailored suit I had last glanced on him was gone. A thin sheet of blue cloth was wrapped around his large figure. His eyes closed in peace while his chest would expand at equal intervals as he was taking heavy breaths. The oxygen mask around his mouth was providing aid to breathe properly. Numerous white cloth was wrapped around his body. And a number of machines operating beside him were clearly indicating the dangerous accident he had survived.
I couldn't must up the courage to walk towards him. I was afraid to find more bruises if I closed the distance between us. Suddenly, the conversation that took place a minute earlier drifted into my mind.
"It will be difficult for him to get on his legs, bones are severely injured."
My sight went of his legs wrapped by a blanket. They seemed normal, maybe the doctor made some mistake. I wanted to convince my heart. I slowly took step towards him. Unknowingly my eyes planned to break into tears. I was seeing him after more than a week. A week that was followed with so much confusion, worry, and anxiety. I was so uncertain about his existence.
The frequent flashes of the past troubling me. The horror of history repeating itself. I was exhausted with it. I was frightened of losing him.
"Idiot!" I rebuked, ending in tears. "How could you punish me like that?" I was scolding him, my tears not at all helping me to seem angry. "You're the dumbest creature existing on the planet." I kept blabbering as I slowly touched his wrist. I wanted to feel his presence. To assure my heart, I wasn't imagining things. He was before my eyes, breathing.
I was never aware that his existence was of so much value to me. The thought of losing him could make me feel dead. I was dead for once, he had brought me back to life without making me aware of it. I couldn't allow him to kill me again. Not when I was starting to believe that I could live.
"You aren't allowed to leave me. Do you understand? I hadn't asked you to come into my life but now that you had entered, you aren't allowed to leave. Not until my last breath." My tears weren't stopping neither were my sobs. I had pulled his hands hiding them in my chest. They were so cold, so large. "I am... in love with you idiot..." I was speaking in between my hiccups. "So much so... that mere thought of losing you suffocates me to hell..." I kept ranting, unbottling my feelings. Discovering my emotions, understanding the complicated stuff of my heart.
I wasn't allowing my mind to enter. I wasn't going to consider if it was correct? If I was doing justice to Rishi? If I was betraying my past? I wanted to lose myself. I wanted to forget my past and maybe this time forever. My past was destroying my present. I couldn't allow my future to be devasted by my past.
"If I knew..." I heard a small mutter suddenly realising Yash was conscious. His set of orbs was staring at me with adoration though I could depict it was drained due to lack of energy. "meeting with an accident could make you fall in love with me, I might have done it long back." He wasn't able to speak it clearly but I understood. His tone was wobbly, due to exhaustion.
I glared at him making a small smile reach his face. His other hand gesturing me to close the distance between us. I shook my head. "You aren't in a condition. Don't move and rest properly." I warned him, as he kept staring at me with a pleading gaze. "What?" I couldn't restrain those puppy eyes.
"I missed you..." His hand that was under my soft grip was attempting to break free from my grip. I allowed him, staring at his action with confusion. His hands slowly reached to cup my cheek. "I hate those tears that were the reason I had ordered Abhi not to inform you. You won't be able to glance at my..." his eyes moved towards his leg. A sense of grief was overpowering in those beautiful orbs.
Was he aware of the tragedy? Was it correct? Won't he ever be able to walk on his leg? I shrink at the thought but the emotion powering on Yash's face strengthened me to act strong. He wasn't allowed to feel powerless.
"I am not that weak..." I countered back. He seemed taken aback for a minute. Keenly observing me as if assuring himself if I was aware.
"I know... sweetheart..." he pressed a soft smile. "I am aware how strong you are but sometimes it isn't about strength but just peace. I had promised to provide you with peace, happiness and maybe faith is having some other plan." His orbs hadn't averted from me for a minute. "My life is going to be different. Things are going to be different and..."
"Shut up," I bounced back understanding what the conversation was shaping into. "I had enough of your nonsense. Now, sleep... no more discussion." He was going to open his mouth but my look was enough to make him shut his mouth.
"I love you..." he whispered before obeying my command. A slight smile reached my spirit at his confession. I wasn't that brave to confess twice in a row so I sealed my tongue shut but I heard him groan though his eyes were shut as I hadn't responded. A giggle popped out glimpsing at his childish nature.
I pecked on his forehead on discovering he was fast asleep. My hands were slowly caressing his face. None had troubled me to such a level. If his state wasn't bad, I would have showered him with my annoyance. I shook my head as my eyes kept staring at him. Assuring my heart that he was for real.
___
A few more chapters and soon the book will be done.
Writing books had thought me to let go, as each time I start writing a book. I start spending time with the characters, they become my friend, I start understanding them and then when the time comes to leave them I feel sad but I know I can't continue to keep them for my selfish desire because that would spoil their beauty and the only option I am left is to let them go. Each time I feel I won't be able to forget my characters but soon the other characters make me engrossed in them and soon they leave me as well.