Present time..
After that day everything changes, that's the last day when Xav saw his cute bubbly czar, that day a part of her dies, a part which was kind, caring. They lost that kind hearted czar, how can she be a kind hearted girl when they broke her heart again and again, that's the last day she let her heart to beat for someone else, that's the last day, coz after that she became a heartless person who hate love, coz it makes her pathetic, venerable, mesirable, weak, nd she swear to never let anyone else make her feel these much pathetic.
Trusting and loving someone didn't do any good for her, it only shatter her heart into pieces, than how can she not hate it, she has stop feeling those feelings, she has shut his emotions, she completely stop herself from feeling those butterflies, those flattering feelings, those increasing heartbeat, she stop feeling all these shits years ago, but jst in few months they ( ryan nd Vyan) make her feel those feelings, they make her heart beat from them again, after sam left her with her broken heart, her heart stop beating for others, it only beat for her to keep her alive, to prove that she is still alive with her shatter soul and heart, but jst few months she spent with them nd they made her heart beat for them, first ryan than vyan.
And it's not a good sign, she didn't want this, she didn't want her heart to beat for someone and again get shattered and crushed by that someone, that's what she is afraid of, she wants her heart to beat for her only her, to keep her alive, but no her stupid heart has to beat for Someone else like a pathetic bitch.
She hugged her knees more tightly, clutching on her hoodie sleeves she feels like she came back to her past, where she finds herself in the same apartment sitting at the same floor where she was waiting for sam to come back, the same floor from were xav save her partially dead body. And again she hears those voices, but this time it does not belong to only one it belongs to 3 person.
sam : I love you rin, i love you so fucking much...
Ryan : i love you so much zaby
Vyan : i love you..
Czarina : everything was a lie..
Nd unconsciously tears started to fall from her eyes, this time she didn't tried to hide it or wipe it she let it flow, she didn't even have any count of time, she doesn't know from how long she was sitting there, she come out of her thoughts when out of nowhere someone cup her face, that's when he comes out of her thoughts. And she thought it was her best friend Xav who was kneeling in front of her, cupping her face..
?? : hey, What happened, tell me what happened, why are you crying, are you alright...?
That person who is cupping her face said getting panicked, his voice laced with concern and worry, but wait his voice, it's not xav voice, it felt so familiar, it sounds like sam, why his voice sounds like sam. Her eyes started to get blurry, She blinked her eyes, trying to clear her vision, she wiped her tears harshly and her whole existence frozen hearing his next word..
Riven : rin..baby look at me..
Thats when she started to get a clear vision of his face, his perfectly sculptured face, those doe eyes, those heart shaped lips which was her favourite, his teary eyes which are filled with guilt. He came back, after making her logged for him and his touch, his presence, his love, his care, he finally came back for her, that day she waited for him at the same place until she lost her consciousness, but he didn't come back, and with that she lost a big part of her, coz when she gained her consciousness back she was a completely different person, a person who is not less than a stone..
Riven : I am sorry please forgive me, I am so sorry. Please give me a chance to repent it... Please...
He attached there forehead together, as tears started to fall from his eyes,
Riven : plss, just..just one chance.. please...
His eyes as red with tears and guilt, she saw the same sam in him whit whom she falls in love with year's ago, the same loving caring sam, czar was stunned by his sudden revelation, he said those words she wanted to hear, she waited for him at the same place for him to come back and say those words, and finally he said it, she should felt relief right, but she is anything but relief, why, why she is not happy.
And the answer is...
Time..
The fact that he comes now but It's already too late, she should have been more than relieved seeing him in front of her, she should have been on cloud nine if he has come back earlier, just a little bit earlier, but now.
It's just too late..
Time can heal a broken heart
But it can also break a waiting heart
It's just too late..
She doesn't need him anymore
She no longer misses him..
And it's all because he made her want him but when she finally wanted him more than anything, he pushed her away..
He took for granted thinking that she would always be there.
Waiting for him to want her the same way she wants him before.
It's funny because as she waited for him to realise what he had..
She finally realised that she didn't need what he had offered..
It's just too late..
She told herself, she'd move on
She told herself, she'd let him go someday.
Honestly it was the Hardest thing she has ever done, but it was worth it.
For her, for her heart, he hurt her so bad.
He killed her trust, he changed her.
She knew she should be strong enough to let him go.
She new it and she did it.
She can't explain how proud she is.
Because she is the only one who knows how much he hurt her.
But here she is healing.
She may love the wrong person.
Cry for the wrong person.
But one thing is for sure.
Mistakes will help her find the right person someday.
Whether it is the same person who breaks her or someone else..
She needs to let sam/Riven go inorder to find out wheather he really meant for her or not, if he'll come back to her again and again than it means he was the one from the starting nd if he didn't that means there relationship was jst a mistake for both of them to learn a lesson from it..
Time is a bitch, it heals you, it give you strength, it make you stronger day by day, Time never waits for Anyone nd Riven is not exceptional, coz the love she has for him faded away slowly, the pain, the Never ending waiting, her broken trust, her broken heart, those tears, everything helps her to move on from the reason behind it, her tears help her to erase the love she has for him, slowly Lil by Lil but finally she was able to do it, as time passes she Learn to move on, it hurts at starting but slowly she get resist to it.
Riven : Rin babe say something, please don't be silent..
And she feels her surroundings start to become blurry, her vision becomes blurry, she is unable to keep her eyes open it's shutting by itself, all the sound around her becomes muffled, and she passed out..
Time skip..
After 3 hours...
As soon as she woke up the pungent smell of hospital disinfect, invaded her nostrils. The room was silent apart from her heavy breathing and the beep beep sound we often hear in hospitals that indicates she is alive. She slowly opened her eyes, squinting in an attempt to sharpen the blurred images before her. She glanced around and took in the deserted, blue and white colour schemed hospital bedroom. How long has she been here? She shut her eyes, trying to remember what had exactly happened. Then it all hits her with a bang. The memory of it all starts to occupy her thoughts.
Evan mansion, that younger guard, the phone booth, the conversation between her nd xav, tht what, what was tht after that, did she really see sam/Riven or it's jst an illusion, everything felt so real, those words, his face, he felt so real, her eyes squeeze tight as she forced on her memory to remember the last happened incident, nd she clearly remember she saw him, his face was the last thing she saw before fainting, but how? What he was doing there ? Is all those are really an imagination of her desperate mind.
If it's not him Then Who brought her here? Out of impulse, her hand travels to her face, pressing the throbbing area on my right temple. She didn't feel any scar but still her head was hurting as she was forcing it to rewind all those incidents, and soon she flinched at the pain. She rubbed her temple and tried to get up. Once she stepped on the cold, white tiles, she instantly fell back on to the bed. Her body is engulfed in pain as if objecting her decision to stand up.
She lay there pathetically, waiting for the pain to wash away. She knows all that pain must be due to the medication they used, it's not something new for her, she always felt these pain after using any kind of medication, it's like that since she started to take drugs, it's a side-effects of being a drug addict for a long duration, she keeps Staring at the ceiling, illuminated with a white fluorescent light. Perhaps waiting for some help from the hospital staff. She still didn't know how she got here, who took her here, how long she has been here.
Her series of questions was interrupted as a devilishly handsome man, with brown hair and mesmerizing doe eyes, emerging from the door of her room, with a mobile phone close to his ear, talk. But as soon as his eyes fall on her wake up figure he drop his phone there only nd embrace her in an urgent hug..
Xavier : fuck you scared the shit out of me, i swear if you haven't woke up i should have come in your dreams nd choke you to death.. you stupid..
He hug her tightly like his life depends on it, czar smile at his best friend stupid remark, but soon she realised that his hug is too tight.. she tap on his back signalling him to pull away..
Czarina : xavy i can't breathe..
His eyes widened in realisation as he immediately pulled away from the hug nd cupped her face..
Xavier : iam so sorry are you allright, are you able to breath..
He asked as he started to panic, he keep observing her from head to toe to check whether she was feeling any of discomfort.
Xavier : take a deep breath, breath in breath out..
He himself started to exhale and inhale deeply, showing her how to do it, like she is a kid who didn't know how to breath, she shook her head but still complied, didn't want to argue with mommy xav, he literally acts like mom sometimes..
Xavier : feeling better..
She nodded, nd extended her arms..
Czarina : hug me..
She literally looks like a kid, which makes Xav to Chuckled but he immediately compiles her order as he wraps her arms around her, engulfing her in his warm protective embrace..
Czarina : i miss these, i miss us, i miss you..
She whispered closing her eyes in contentment, snuggling more into him, wanting to disappear in his arms, she curled herself like a ball completely hiding herself in his arms, she wants to hide here for her entire life, far away from those selfish worlds and it's people, nothing can calm her like these protective arms radiating warmth. She feels relaxed, her best friend is one of her save zone, his warm embrace give her a sense of security and relief..
Xavier : me too czar.. me too
Xav whispers back and peaks her head, while he keeps stroking her hair,as she likes it whenever he strokes her hair, he keeps stroking her hair smoothly trying to ease whatever is going on in her mind or whatever is bothering her, xav is sitting in the bed, his legs are dangling out of the bed touching the floor while czar is half lying on the bed, there's a good comfortable silence between them.
Until..
Czarina : where is he..
She asked without any emotions, as xav is unable to point out any imotion even if there's any..
Xavier : outside..
Czarina hummed at it, she was 90 % sure that she saw him, but now she becomes 100% sure, but her expression is still unfazed snuggling more into him, it takes her time but she realised something, which she should have realised earlier. Or should I say she realised it earlier but she was unable to accept it, It definitely takes time but she did it..
Czarina : so how many punches..
This question makes Xav smile, no one knows him better than her, but still she was unable to differentiate Between love as a friend and love someone more than friends, such a dumb she is when it comes to relationship..
Xavier : hmmmm i didn't count maybe more than 10 or 20..
This make czarina Chuckled, she knows her bestfriend will not forgive anyone who will hurt her, nd what riven did was something he can't tolerate, she was amazed that he didn't kill him, it's not like she wanted Riven to die hell no, it's jst she knows how much xav hate Riven. Xav is the best example of the most famous phrases "Our best friend hates our ex more than we do... Isn't it"
Czarina : i hope those punches are hard enough to make him Remind of you for atleast months..
She lift her head from his chest nd wink at him, earning an smirk from him.
Xavier : trust me my each punch is enough to make him remember me for more than 2 months..
He replied with an iam so proud of my punch type of tone, they really are the safest zone for each other..
Czarina : yeah i trust you my boy and the training i give you...
She replied patting his head like she is appreciating his hard work like a proud teacher, xav pur at her gentle gesture, his stupid heart started to beat faster and faster, he showed her his brightest smile trying his best to hide those pink tint which crept on his cheeks..
Czarina : buy the how did you know iam here. What really happened after I completely black out
She asked in confusion.. she moved a little back giving him more space to sit properly,
Xavier : oh that,
He remove his shoes and placed both of his leg on the bed hugging his knees, as czar placed her chin over his knees, listening to his each and every word attententively
Xavier : when I reach there he was already with you with his damn ugly face asshole..
Nd czar has to use all her strength to stop herself from laughing at the remark he used for Riven, hell in this whole world only xav will be the only person to say Riven ugly face asshole, coz hell riven is hot from head to toe, in past he was able to sway someone like Czar with his charm, then there's no one in the world whom he can't made droll over him like some honeybee over honey, but look at xav he looks really cute while he used those remake for riven..
Xavier : he was trying to wake you up, but i thought he was some kind of pervert so i punch him and drag him away from you, but when I saw his damn ugly face, something tick in my mind nd I punch him continuously, again and again until my eyes landed on you, thts when i let go of tht ugly face asshole, you are more important than that asshole so i punched him hard for the last time nd bring you here..
She hummed with a slight smile on her lips hearing him explaining everything but it sounds more like complaining rather than explaining, he keeps frowning like a cute angry puppy which makes him looks like a kindergarten kid who is complaining about some bad guys who bullied him..
Xavier : but that ugly face asshole follows me and comes here, if it's not for those doctors and medical staff who stop me from killing that asshole, i swear he should have been laid in the morgue instead of standing outside, that fucking ugly face asshole, aghhhh i jst hate his ugly face..
He huff nd thats it czar burst out in laughter, she laughed her heart out clutching her stomach, xav didn't remember when was the last day he saw him laughing like these wholeheartedly, without caring for anything or anyone..
Czarina : you... Hahahaha you.. look at you.. hahah.. jst look at your face.. you.. hahaha..
She tried to speak between her laughter but failed miserably, she is unable to complete her sentence as she again brust out in laughter, laughing with her whole existence, xav can't help but admire the most mesmerizing sight in front of him, it's like he found the old czarina back, the old bubbly one who knows how to laugh, smile nd live life to the fullest, the old czarina whom he lost in that apartment, yes he successfully save her that day, but he was unable to save a part of her, which die there in that apartment, a part of her which left her along with Riven, it's like he took that part of her with him, but now he finally saw that czar whom he lost years ago, he literally lose hope to see these site of her,
something changes?
But what?
Is it because of Riven ?
Did he brings these old czarina back ?
Did she became old bubbly czarina coz she found her long lost love back?
They said When you tell the story and it doesn't bring up any pain that means you are healed..
She was not in pain or any kind of discomfort, she was so casual while mentioning riven, did she already forgive him for whatever he did.
Or
His presence is working as a magical portion which is healing her every wounds?
No one can heal your pain better than the one who gives you that pain, is it really true?
Xavier's mind is messed up with millions of questions
Czarina : iam... Iam sorry.. but you look like an angry puppy.. oh my gosh.
Nd after minutes of controlling her laughter she finally stop laughing, but when she paid attention to xav she found him lost in his own world, she shook him..
Czarina : yahhhh Mr. Day dreamer come back to earth..
She snap her fingers in front of his face bringing him back to reality, he look at her with wide eyes...
Czarina : what happened...
She asked in confusion, xav immediately shook his head in a no, didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable , it seems she didn't notice what she did just now, she laughed wholeheartedly, but still she was unaware of it.
Xavier : nothing i was just thinking to kick his ugly ass once more as soon as he was out of the hospital premises..
Xav said trying to divert the topic. Czarina Chuckled and nodded..
Czarina : sounds like a plan..
Nd they both brust out in laughter, which went on for minute's. But soon czar's laughter dies when she unintentionally glance at the door nd saw a shadow indicating that someone is standing at the other side of the door, nd she knows very well who he is.
Czarina : xav...
Her voice was dead serious making xav look at her with worried eyes..
what's with this look czar, Don't tell me you want to give him another chance..
Don't tell me you are ready to love him again who is the sole reason of making you to hate these words.
Don't tell me you are ready to bet you heart for him..
Don't tell me you still love him even after all the pain and suffering he made you go through..
All these questions kept clouding his mind, Xavier wanted to ask all these, but it looks like a lump stuck in his throat, he gulp the invisible lump nd parted his lips to say something
Xavier : what happened... I...
Before he could complete Czar cut him off..
Czarina : i wanna talk to him, tell him to come inside.
Shit, why my thoughts has to be come out from her mouth..
Xavier whole existence Froze at the words left from her lips..
Xavier : are.. are.. you going to give him another chance..
He asked hesitatedly hoping she deny his words but what she said broke his heart, nd kill all his hopes..
Czarina : i think it's time we give each other a chance, afterall i loved him wholeheartedly, and for the sake of that love he deserves a chance isn't he....
She said with an calm smile, but xav is anything but calm, it's hurt to see her choosing someone else again nd again instead of him, he agreed he never asked her to choose between someone else and him, but still there's a little tiny miny hope in his heart, that maybe one day she'll recognise his true feelings and accept him wholeheartedly, it's all his fantasies which he can't say out loud, he can't say anything, coz her happiness is what he wanted, nd whatever makes her happy he'll support her in that. If her happiness is in sam/Riven then let it be, but this time even if czar agrees to give him a chance he'll not let his guard off one mistake from riven, one single drop of tear from czarina's eyes and he swear he'll kill him at that instant...
To be continued.....
Hint for upcoming chapters..
Whatever you are thinking will not going to happen, and what you haven't even imagined of will happen and that's going to blow.. so be careful with your thinking and imagination 😜😜
I hope you enjoyed these chapter..