******
A week has passed since that happened. I didn't want to remember it, but I didn't want to forget about it either. I went back to that damned house and now everyone treated me like garbage, adding to the fact that my Grandma found out she has serious health problems that only got worst after Jake's death. Great, I was killing my Grandma.
I didn't go back to college, I was having private classes at home. My Grandma didn't want me to leave often, and to be honest I didn't want to leave either. Every time I did, I'd remember him.
Scott.
I haven't heard anything from Scott since, I just texted Esther once in a while. She was the only one who actually talked to me and she told me how Scott got back to being the arrogant boy he used to be. Thinking about Scott being a completely different person now made me feel worse about myself, but they all deserved it. Especially Dice.
Esther also told me that Dice didn't accomplish shit by doing what she did: she keeps being ignored by the boys and she's only good for a quick fuck. Esther said that she hasn't had any sex with anyone but Avi, though.
Mike preferred not to take me home nor visit me while I was here, he said he didn't really like the house and that he felt bad vibes coming from it. He was right. I also found out that I was developing symptoms of depression and was medicated for it, and that Jake's body was never found. My Grandma told me this, but she didn't really tell me anything else.
"It's so good to have you back." My grandma said. I was laying on her lap and she was petting my head in a way very similar to Mike's. Crying was already a routine for me and every time I cried, my grandma would try to console me. It was 11.13am, on a Saturday, and I was laying in bed not wanting to move nor go out. I wanted a cigarette, though, but it's impossible for me to smoke in this place. "Honey, why don't you go out with Joseph? You need to get out of bed, someday."
"I don't want to." I whispered.
"Look, I've been trying to not talk about this, but will you please explain to me why did you leave? Who where you with? The letter you left made me awfully curious."
"I was discovering new things I couldn't discover here." I said, positioning myself in front of her. "Grandma I was tired of this spoiled life, I needed to start taking care of myself."
"You could've just said it... I could've..."
"No Grandma, you couldn't. You want me to be a prince and the next king, but I don't want that. At all." I said and she looked at me, surprised. "Sorry."
"It's okay, I understand you. The royal life can be exhausting and it's a serious thing, and it'd forbid you to do a lot of things. Look... I don't know if I should say this but I don't want you to live like this." I looked at her, surprised. "I want you to be you. A rebel, a homosexual, whatever you want to be... just be you. I just don't want to lose you again. And if you leave again, please tell me. I won't go looking for you, I just want peace of mind." I was wondering why she was being so nice to me, she was changed: I could tell.
"Thanks Grandma." I hugged her and she got up.
"I have to go now, I need Rick to help me with something." Rick, the new cock-sucker. They told me he was the father of a member of a band from the show Sing-Off, I don't know the name of the band but I can assure you they are NOT good. "I hope you stay safe. And if you need anything, the maids are here for you."
She left and closed the door, as I stared into the ceiling. I didn't miss this place at all and the fact that I was here was blindly pissing me off. I feel my phone vibrate and I check Whatsapp, just to see a text from Esther.
E: Hey, what are you doing? Wanna go out with your bad girl friend? xx
M: You're okay with going out with the again Queen's grandson? :)
E: Save that for your grandma. I'll meet you at the shopping mall in 10 minutes!!
I put on some clothes and my snapback, I didn't have time to do my hair nor take a shower. Grabbing a banana, I left the house and waved at a cab, which drove me to the mall.
I got there and started walking by some stores, including the candy store, to which I bought a lemon lollipop and sat down on one of the benches, sucking it and waiting for Esther.
"Hello." I heard a whisper in my ear and I got up and, turning around, I tried to punch her arm. "Dammit Mitch!!" she grabbed my arm, stopping me from punching her.
"I didn't know you robbed during the day." I laughed and she showed me her tongue. "How are you?" I asked and she nodded.
"You look kinda down." she said and I gave her a bored look. "Sorry. How's your grandma?"
"She's a bit better." I smiled. "The fucking house is a bore, but at least Jake isn't there anymore. They didn't find his body, but the TV still announced the funeral." I said, throwing away the lollipop stick. "How's things in the house?"
"Tense. There's no life, there's no laughs. He barely stays at home now." I immediately thought of Scott as a boy-whore, one who fucks every boy around. But I was wrong. "He already brought millions of dollars into the house. His robberies last until dawn. He has changed," I lowered my head and bit my lip. "He misses you, Mitch." I rolled my eyes and looked at her.
"If he wanted to be with me, he still has my number. Not to mention he'd believe me and not that bitch Dice. I don't even care about the sex, Scott was basically raped but of course Dice won't say a word about it." I walked towards the ice cream store and asked for one. "If he misses me, imagine how I miss him." she smiled.
"You two are completely in love." I laughed. "But he's gonna wait until you speak up. Scott's extremely proud of himself and he won't lower his guard to anyone." I heard her words and thought of what he might have been doing that exact moment.
We ate, we talked, we shopped for loads of clothes. And yet, the thought of Scott wouldn't leave my head. Was he proud enough not to come talk to me and apologize? But I loved him so much, I was willing to do anything for him.
We left the shopping mall and I called an Uber.
"When will you return?" she asked.
"I won't."
"Yeah, you will."
"I don't know, Esther..."
"You love him and I don't even need an answer to prove it!" Esther kissed my cheek. "I'll see you when I see you." she smiled. I quickly entered my Uber and they left me on Starbucks, I needed it.
I asked for a Chai Latte. There were so many people there blocking the way, but I decided to go anyway. But then, when I was walking towards a table, I immediately fell on the floor, my Latte all over my shirt and a guy on top of me.
"I'm sorry, I knew I shouldn't have passed here." I said while he helped me get up. He immediately adjusted his beanie and I adjusted my snapback, trying to clean my shirt.
"It was my fault!! I should've seen you." he said, holding my hand and pulling me to get up. "I'm Troye. Do you need..."
"No, I'm fine, I'm just... kinda sweet right now." he laughed at my unfunny joke. How cute. "I'm Mitch, by the way."
"I know who you are." he said and I laughed, obviously he knew. Who doesn't. "I can take you home on my motorcycle. It's the least I can do after I basically ruined your Versace." And he knew the brand of my shirt?! I liked him already. And he was cute as fuck, not gonna lie. I nodded and we walked towards his motorcycle, hopping on it after he did. "Hold on tight, Mitch." he said and I held the back of the motorcycle for balance. I didn't want much touching, I didn't even know the guy.
And then... I remembered how it was to drive with Scott. Fucking hell, stupid tears streaming down my face again. In a few minutes, we arrived and I hopped off, wiping my tears.
"Did something happen?" he asked.
"No, nothing. Thanks for the ride. Maybe we can see each other without Latte all over me." we laughed.
"Of course, whenever you want." Curious how he still hasn't referred to me as "prince" or "Queen's grandson", which made me a bit happy. "I'll see you." he waved at me and I waved back. Then he left.
Cool guy.
I entered the house and ran to my room, taking my shirt off while running. I started checking myself in the mirror: I was a mess. I had a giant bruise on my hip from that night in the club, that monster Travis. But, every time I checked myself in the mirror, I'd always remember how Scott would hug me from behind and tell me how beautiful I was and how much he liked me. Crying was inevitable, at this point.
Fuck, I miss him so fucking much.
******
It was 11.13pm and sleep still hadn't arrived, I was so unused to the timetable of this place. There, I had my own timetable and I followed no rules.
I decided to leave the house and walk towards the nearest gas station, buying a bag of gluten-free chips. It was so weird, everyone was staring at me: well, I was wearing sunglasses at night. But it was only because I wanted to hide my bags and my obviously dry eyes, from crying so hard.
When I got back home, I was still bored as fuck. I then decided to do another crazy thing, which was take the BMW and go drive around town, trying to forget everything I lived during the time I was with Scott. I left a note on the coffee table and I left, heading towards the garage.
I got on the black BMW and I drove, drove and drove.
I was pretty far away by now and, all of the sudden, a song by that band Rick's son is in started playing on the radio. It was a beautiful song, called Run to You.
Fuck, what was the name of the fucking band?
I decided to park the car and listen to the song, trying hard not to cry. How fucking relatable. But the moment was instantly ruined when I hear someone entering the car on the passenger's seat, with a gun on their hand.
"GET OUT OF THE CAR NOW AND NOBODY GETS HURT!" I felt the gun on my head, I was ready to punch him. But I recognized that voice, I would always recognize that voice.
"Scott?!" I said and he pulled his mask up.
"Mitch?!" he said and we went silence, and the only sound was from Run to You , which seemed to enter our ears like crazy.